New Guys vs Experienced Players
Tags: Tanis | Psychologyxplain
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125 comments displayed.
#1
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lollypopalopicus (01/03/2016) [-]
Nothing like the guy kicking in the door to the lair of a ******* lich.
#36 to #1
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rimmerdall (01/04/2016) [-] reminds me of a battle whe had once.
we where a paty of 5 at lvl 8. our mage had forged a pact with a demon lord, so he recived a book which had turned im to a sucubuss and gaind an ability he could use once a week, with no idea what it was. The paladin in the group had recived an eqivilant to thors hammer.
our party came across an small base/encampment in and around a muntain, which we ofcourse wanted to explore. upon entering we soon found us face to face with a lich, wich we managed to kill. so on we went. we somehow managed to survive another two liches, before reuniting/freeing Bargin Bargin, the sorta retarded hillbilly merchant wheve had som dealing with in the past, which may, or may not include me selling him an bridge belonging an military base.
We exited the base and set up and magic barier to rest up and sleep, thinking ourself safe.
the next mourning we found bargain holdign the book of the demon lord, before reveling himslef as the lich lord. the first thing to happen was the lich attacking us dealing som masive damage. our paladin then decided to throw his hammer, since it was quite some distacne between us, wich dealt nice damge on both the throw and return. our mage decided he wanted to use his new secret power, wich just so happend to be power word kill, and the lich just so happend to die, making t he dm quite frustrated, so at teh end of the session he reveled that the last bit of damage had set the lich health to exactly 100.
all gory to the luck
we where a paty of 5 at lvl 8. our mage had forged a pact with a demon lord, so he recived a book which had turned im to a sucubuss and gaind an ability he could use once a week, with no idea what it was. The paladin in the group had recived an eqivilant to thors hammer.
our party came across an small base/encampment in and around a muntain, which we ofcourse wanted to explore. upon entering we soon found us face to face with a lich, wich we managed to kill. so on we went. we somehow managed to survive another two liches, before reuniting/freeing Bargin Bargin, the sorta retarded hillbilly merchant wheve had som dealing with in the past, which may, or may not include me selling him an bridge belonging an military base.
We exited the base and set up and magic barier to rest up and sleep, thinking ourself safe.
the next mourning we found bargain holdign the book of the demon lord, before reveling himslef as the lich lord. the first thing to happen was the lich attacking us dealing som masive damage. our paladin then decided to throw his hammer, since it was quite some distacne between us, wich dealt nice damge on both the throw and return. our mage decided he wanted to use his new secret power, wich just so happend to be power word kill, and the lich just so happend to die, making t he dm quite frustrated, so at teh end of the session he reveled that the last bit of damage had set the lich health to exactly 100.
all gory to the luck
#54 to #36
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lollypopalopicus (01/04/2016) [-]
>Lich killed by death magic.
>Mjölnir hammer expy.
>All this at level 8.
How in the flying **** did you accomplish all this? What edition? Not raging at you but rather confused as hell, as that seems kinda odd.
>Mjölnir hammer expy.
>All this at level 8.
How in the flying **** did you accomplish all this? What edition? Not raging at you but rather confused as hell, as that seems kinda odd.
#117 to #103
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holycrapimacupcake (01/04/2016) [-] A paladin would never dare ally himself with a demon loving mage.
#134 to #54
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rimmerdall (01/05/2016) [-] can start our by saying that the players, includeing me were quite noobish, might aslo been a cleric and not a paladin, as i just remembered the paladin dying earlier.
but anyway, due to past events we found ourself traped in the plane of the demonlords, so to get out we made a deal with one, that was traped. so in return for freeing him, he would take us back to our world, were we would wage war on another demonlord, and each of us would get one wish/gift granted to us, and all we had to do was a sacreficial ritual, where the mage offered himself, and in return came back as a sucubuss
but anyway, due to past events we found ourself traped in the plane of the demonlords, so to get out we made a deal with one, that was traped. so in return for freeing him, he would take us back to our world, were we would wage war on another demonlord, and each of us would get one wish/gift granted to us, and all we had to do was a sacreficial ritual, where the mage offered himself, and in return came back as a sucubuss
#135 to #134
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lollypopalopicus (01/05/2016) [-]
Okay but how were you waging war on a demon lord? They are capable of granting Clerics spells because of their power. At level eight it should kill all of you in one round. It would be like an imprisoned spec ops telling some toddlers to set him free in exchange for candy and killing a special forces unit. I am guessing that you are playing a newer edition that I am not familiar with, or your DM is nerfing the ever living **** out of them.
But as you said, I know people whose first character was level 120, so what you described is not beyond what I have heard before for new players, and I imagine you are/will rein(ing) in characters, if that is what you wish to do, at some point.
But as you said, I know people whose first character was level 120, so what you described is not beyond what I have heard before for new players, and I imagine you are/will rein(ing) in characters, if that is what you wish to do, at some point.
#136 to #135
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rimmerdall (01/06/2016) [-] the war. for the most part would consist of us fighting the minions/servants of the other demonlord. But that is where the qampain ended, due to time constraints, and to some part lazynes of the others and a bit of sicknes
#69 to #36
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masdercheef (01/04/2016) [-] "may or may not include me selling him a bridge belonging to a military base"
Did you steal the bridge first?
Did you steal the bridge first?
#106 to #1
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angelusprimus (01/04/2016) [-] Crashing down through a volcano skylight in the middle of Red Dragon orgy.
Now THEN you are ****** .
Possibly literally.
Now THEN you are ****** .
Possibly literally.
#67 to #1
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holycrapimacupcake (01/04/2016) [-] Or the guy who thinks charging into a ******* dragons layer at level three is a smart idea.
#116 to #79
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holycrapimacupcake (01/04/2016) [-] Nah, I'd just like to keep my Paladin alive for more than htree hours.
#14 to #1
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jeffthellamaking [OP]ONLINE (01/03/2016) [-] There's always someone chasing Leeroy's shadow.
#31 to #14
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magicmatchsticks (01/04/2016) [-] Someone should make a D&D adventure where a thinly veiled expy of leeroy jenkins is the deity of honorable battle or something
#120 to #31
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jeffthellamaking [OP]ONLINE (01/04/2016) [-] Who'd thinly veil it?
The guy should be canon.
The guy should be canon.
#9 to #1
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anon (01/03/2016) [-] >psionic monk
forget actual stats and most of everything that happened
what i do remember:
>1 size above gargantuan whatever the **** that is.
>baseline strength of +34
>combat skills can increase that by max of +60 something
>passive skill, unarmed. for every level in size i gain +10 strength
>can probably juggle half a dozen power armors or more at this point
>butwaittheresmore.gif
>had to get a secondary item to increase my own durability because my punches would shatter my own arm
>rolled for random campain item
>ring increases size by 1 for every incriment of 10 my strength stat is.
>unable to describe mfw
long campain short:
>steamrolling literally everything
>some halfass necromancer tried to res an entire graveyard. buried him like onepunchman
>etc
>later on
>roll to kick in some iron door
>nat 20
> **** nice
>roll for combat strength buff
>nat 20
>...
>roll for kick effect on door
>nat 20
>ohhellnaw.jpg
>door soars as a ******* missile
>lich we didnt even know was behind the door, now a stain on the ground
>iron ******* door keeps going
>shatters back wall of fortress and lands off in some forest behind a mountan 30 leagues away killing some elfin cheif or whatever
>thats a big ass tombstone for the elf
>partys FW
forget actual stats and most of everything that happened
what i do remember:
>1 size above gargantuan whatever the **** that is.
>baseline strength of +34
>combat skills can increase that by max of +60 something
>passive skill, unarmed. for every level in size i gain +10 strength
>can probably juggle half a dozen power armors or more at this point
>butwaittheresmore.gif
>had to get a secondary item to increase my own durability because my punches would shatter my own arm
>rolled for random campain item
>ring increases size by 1 for every incriment of 10 my strength stat is.
>unable to describe mfw
long campain short:
>steamrolling literally everything
>some halfass necromancer tried to res an entire graveyard. buried him like onepunchman
>etc
>later on
>roll to kick in some iron door
>nat 20
> **** nice
>roll for combat strength buff
>nat 20
>...
>roll for kick effect on door
>nat 20
>ohhellnaw.jpg
>door soars as a ******* missile
>lich we didnt even know was behind the door, now a stain on the ground
>iron ******* door keeps going
>shatters back wall of fortress and lands off in some forest behind a mountan 30 leagues away killing some elfin cheif or whatever
>thats a big ass tombstone for the elf
>partys FW
#11 to #9
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mcoperator (01/03/2016) [-] Jesus Christ, anon. I seriously hope you aren't using a d20 system, because that **** is broken as hell
#23 to #11
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mcoperator (01/04/2016) [-] Wait I just realized you were rolling natural 20's rather than from any d100 system. **** me, I'm both dumb and dumbfounded.
#80 to #11
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anon (01/04/2016) [-]
>>#47, >>#22,
>have a second game.
>gain pacifism skill, can no longer do ANY damage whatsoever
>heres where **** gets real.
>according to the rule book we had at the time. forget if this was 3 or 2. it was way back.
>all attack skill has to be dumped elsewhere.
>30strength 35attack baseline.
>dump it all in strength
>heres where the obscure ass rules come into play
because i can do no attack all of my combat skills that buffed it instead went negative which broke the game and buffed my strength to 65+60 with +100 for every -1 under zero my attack went.
>I am become pacifism destroyer of worlds
>with passive skills tack on +30 more for my size
>can juggle cthulu like a ************* chihuahua
>craft a ******** crusifix out of dwarf star material.
heres an example of what a guy who can juggle cthulu but do ZERO damage to ANYTHING in the game
>toss crusifix
>it weighs more than half the ******* planet itself.
>crashes with the impact of a thousand suns exploding
>entire battlefield a crater
>nobody dies
>roll intimidation
>nat20
> ***************** .facepalm
>all armies and kingdoms of the world bow to me as their ruler and emporer out of shere ******* fear
>have a second game.
>gain pacifism skill, can no longer do ANY damage whatsoever
>heres where **** gets real.
>according to the rule book we had at the time. forget if this was 3 or 2. it was way back.
>all attack skill has to be dumped elsewhere.
>30strength 35attack baseline.
>dump it all in strength
>heres where the obscure ass rules come into play
because i can do no attack all of my combat skills that buffed it instead went negative which broke the game and buffed my strength to 65+60 with +100 for every -1 under zero my attack went.
>I am become pacifism destroyer of worlds
>with passive skills tack on +30 more for my size
>can juggle cthulu like a ************* chihuahua
>craft a ******** crusifix out of dwarf star material.
heres an example of what a guy who can juggle cthulu but do ZERO damage to ANYTHING in the game
>toss crusifix
>it weighs more than half the ******* planet itself.
>crashes with the impact of a thousand suns exploding
>entire battlefield a crater
>nobody dies
>roll intimidation
>nat20
> ***************** .facepalm
>all armies and kingdoms of the world bow to me as their ruler and emporer out of shere ******* fear
#47 to #9
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epicalania (01/04/2016) [-] >My first D&D game, I was a sorcerer, friend, also his first game, was a wizard.
>Various regular playing up till lvl 5, spell 'dream'.
>Now me and my friend get a plottin', we leave the party for a while under the guise of "special ritual of our god, Empream". Paladin gets a bit suspicious since he's never heard of it spent a lot of time researching gods in his backstory .
>Find a small village. Tell sleeping peasants their new lord and deity shall rise, blah blah blah, somewhat cringy "ima god" crap.
>Do this for about a week before returning to the party, by now rumours of a new god have shown up to them and the party immediately suspects us.
>Can't prove anything so nothing happens.
>Spread our 'holy word' wherever we can
>choose our spells to suit our plot, giving up some combat potential in exchange for what will eventually lead to one player refusing to play with us again.
> eventually, after about a year ingame, we are ready. We head out on our week long ritual again, this time we don't just give messages. We travel for a day to a large town, we don't want a city yet but a village is too small
>At dawn, just as the people are leaving their houses, a flash of blinding light pierces the sky, a brilliant blue flame traces patterns in it's wake, and descending from it is I, Kil'Gathronet, god of various **** that we mostly made up to suit the local people as we talked to them.
>Eventually people settled upon war, protection and, for some reason, sheep.
>We used our magic to show off to the ignorant peasants, left them with various gifts including large amounts of food, enchanted tools and the heads of any bandits nearby.
>Word spreads quickly, the blue fire became a symbol of Kil'Gathronet, we travelled accross the land in a path more or less towards the capitol, where the party was heading.
>many detours to visit villages, towns, anywhere people lived.
>Get called a false god many times, kill the heretics in creative, flashy ways.
>DM tells us in private that we can't actually become gods by having people think we are, he doesn't want to deal with that **** .
>Thats fine.
>we've been gone for two weeks now, party is probs suspicious as **** .
>tell our followers that the king has betrayed his people, blah blah blah, holy vengeance, blah, gather everyone and we march at the dawn of the new month.
>send followers into the capitol to convert as many people as we can.
>get moles in the city guard, even manage one in the palace guard.
By this point I'm lvl 12 and my friend is lvl 13.
>dawn, army of peasants holding various tools, a few bandits we converted, some small militia groups from various towns.
>Only really intimidating to other peasants.
>Tell the army that a group of holy warriors would appear to fight for our side.
>march on the city
>city archers slaughter many
>our people in the city get to work
>chaos in the guards, city gates stuck half closed.
>people running through the streets screaming that the city is doomed we figured getting citizens panicked would help us
>party appears to defend the city
>oh **** , it's you guys
>wanna help us conquer a kingdom?
>but what about the invasion we have to defend it against?
>wouldn't that be easier if we were in charge?
>paladin refuses to help, but the rest help out and lead the fight to the palace.
>we win, crown the swordsman as king and go on to set up defending the city, with it's new patron god.
>when the invasion comes we lose abysmally.
>what happened?
>the paladin helped the enemy invade for retribution for being false gods
>DM refuses to let our **** happen ever again
>rogue refuses to play with both of us at once
>Various regular playing up till lvl 5, spell 'dream'.
>Now me and my friend get a plottin', we leave the party for a while under the guise of "special ritual of our god, Empream". Paladin gets a bit suspicious since he's never heard of it spent a lot of time researching gods in his backstory .
>Find a small village. Tell sleeping peasants their new lord and deity shall rise, blah blah blah, somewhat cringy "ima god" crap.
>Do this for about a week before returning to the party, by now rumours of a new god have shown up to them and the party immediately suspects us.
>Can't prove anything so nothing happens.
>Spread our 'holy word' wherever we can
>choose our spells to suit our plot, giving up some combat potential in exchange for what will eventually lead to one player refusing to play with us again.
> eventually, after about a year ingame, we are ready. We head out on our week long ritual again, this time we don't just give messages. We travel for a day to a large town, we don't want a city yet but a village is too small
>At dawn, just as the people are leaving their houses, a flash of blinding light pierces the sky, a brilliant blue flame traces patterns in it's wake, and descending from it is I, Kil'Gathronet, god of various **** that we mostly made up to suit the local people as we talked to them.
>Eventually people settled upon war, protection and, for some reason, sheep.
>We used our magic to show off to the ignorant peasants, left them with various gifts including large amounts of food, enchanted tools and the heads of any bandits nearby.
>Word spreads quickly, the blue fire became a symbol of Kil'Gathronet, we travelled accross the land in a path more or less towards the capitol, where the party was heading.
>many detours to visit villages, towns, anywhere people lived.
>Get called a false god many times, kill the heretics in creative, flashy ways.
>DM tells us in private that we can't actually become gods by having people think we are, he doesn't want to deal with that **** .
>Thats fine.
>we've been gone for two weeks now, party is probs suspicious as **** .
>tell our followers that the king has betrayed his people, blah blah blah, holy vengeance, blah, gather everyone and we march at the dawn of the new month.
>send followers into the capitol to convert as many people as we can.
>get moles in the city guard, even manage one in the palace guard.
By this point I'm lvl 12 and my friend is lvl 13.
>dawn, army of peasants holding various tools, a few bandits we converted, some small militia groups from various towns.
>Only really intimidating to other peasants.
>Tell the army that a group of holy warriors would appear to fight for our side.
>march on the city
>city archers slaughter many
>our people in the city get to work
>chaos in the guards, city gates stuck half closed.
>people running through the streets screaming that the city is doomed we figured getting citizens panicked would help us
>party appears to defend the city
>oh **** , it's you guys
>wanna help us conquer a kingdom?
>but what about the invasion we have to defend it against?
>wouldn't that be easier if we were in charge?
>paladin refuses to help, but the rest help out and lead the fight to the palace.
>we win, crown the swordsman as king and go on to set up defending the city, with it's new patron god.
>when the invasion comes we lose abysmally.
>what happened?
>the paladin helped the enemy invade for retribution for being false gods
>DM refuses to let our **** happen ever again
>rogue refuses to play with both of us at once
#76 to #58
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majestispaceduck (01/04/2016) [-] A less epic first game, all luck,
>start in town
>party of 3
>rather unforgiving DM
>everyone in my party gets drunk after 3 in game days of nothing happening cept me cause monk
>dm finally rolls to have orcs come and pillage while everyone else is drunk
>just 3 orcs
>think to myself i got this and go to stop them on a naturally formed bridge covered in snow with steep falls on either side
>land a hit on one causing it to stumble and knock the other two off the bridge before falling off itself
>dm is pissed while everyone else laughs.
I don't know why he was upset, he very obviously put the bridge in his own story for a reason, that's actually the only time i "played" i usually dm now.
>start in town
>party of 3
>rather unforgiving DM
>everyone in my party gets drunk after 3 in game days of nothing happening cept me cause monk
>dm finally rolls to have orcs come and pillage while everyone else is drunk
>just 3 orcs
>think to myself i got this and go to stop them on a naturally formed bridge covered in snow with steep falls on either side
>land a hit on one causing it to stumble and knock the other two off the bridge before falling off itself
>dm is pissed while everyone else laughs.
I don't know why he was upset, he very obviously put the bridge in his own story for a reason, that's actually the only time i "played" i usually dm now.
#127 to #58
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epicalania (01/05/2016) [-] DMs pretty cool, I'd played other games with him before and he knew the sort of **** I'd pull, he doesn't make it easy but he's a good GM, doesn't like to have too much rolling when RPing works better. On the other hand, I've since played with a GM who made me roll to open a door. Which I then rerolled until I succeeded and nothing came of it.
I'm pretty good at getting this sort of ******** to work logically.
I'm pretty good at getting this sort of ******** to work logically.
#128 to #127
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epicalania (01/05/2016) [-] EDIT: Other non d&d games incase anyone gets confused, this was my first d&d game but I'd played things like Call of Cthulhu and **** before
#22 to #9
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mcmanybucks (01/04/2016) [-] please send this in to that DND stories tumblr..id love to see it drawn.
#114 to #89
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mcmanybucks (01/04/2016) [-] is that a rule?
i mean, you cant be fully certain that any of the dndstories actually happened..getting a d20 x3 is rare but possible.
i mean, you cant be fully certain that any of the dndstories actually happened..getting a d20 x3 is rare but possible.
#8
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anotherhaloguy ONLINE (01/03/2016) [-] The annoying thing when I play D&D is the fact our campaigns are never completed, because our DM makes it his goal to murder us; not just slightly but massively obvious
I'm talking like; insta decapitation by an enemy that was too high level but we couldn't avoid or run from.
Its annoying when you die to something you couldn't fight in the first place, that the DM just hurdled at you with little justification
I'm talking like; insta decapitation by an enemy that was too high level but we couldn't avoid or run from.
Its annoying when you die to something you couldn't fight in the first place, that the DM just hurdled at you with little justification
#104 to #8
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restorf ONLINE (01/04/2016) [-] I don't usually try to kill my players, but during a Pathfinder scenario I was running, my group had to try and question a gentleman who was in charge of "The Forge", a place that he basically created a bunch of magical golems. In fact, he had Iron Golems as guards to keep out anyone he didn't want to talk to. All my players were level 1 and I thought that this seemed like a good deterrent from seeking the NPC here and instead search elsewhere in the city.
I was wrong.
Our magus decided that there was enough talk and through out an acid splash at one of the golems (A piddling 1d3 damage). Naturally it bounced right off. The golems advanced and made it quite clear that he should back off. *Acid Splash* The golems stomp right up and tower over him by a good 7 feet. *Acid Splash* I rolled the attack and damage. Even with non-lethal, he was paste.
mfw he told me that he thought the golems would be killable or they wouldn't be in the scenario.
I was wrong.
Our magus decided that there was enough talk and through out an acid splash at one of the golems (A piddling 1d3 damage). Naturally it bounced right off. The golems advanced and made it quite clear that he should back off. *Acid Splash* The golems stomp right up and tower over him by a good 7 feet. *Acid Splash* I rolled the attack and damage. Even with non-lethal, he was paste.
mfw he told me that he thought the golems would be killable or they wouldn't be in the scenario.
#110 to #104
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anotherhaloguy ONLINE (01/04/2016) [-] Understandable if he started the attack, but ours was at our like first mission; a stealth mission and we were on the way back, when the battle began and we were on the wrong side of everything... Didn't stop him spawning a 7 foot tall Demon infront of us that decapitated my shamen in one hit, I didn't even try to fight it, just healed my friend who was near death
We were Level 3 by the way
But I get it if they engaged in the fight so you squish them
We were Level 3 by the way
But I get it if they engaged in the fight so you squish them
#34 to #28
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keroberios (01/04/2016) [-]
I like to say to my parties. "My job is to almost kill you every night. Everything is survivable, sometimes its harder than others. But if you die, you ****** up, or just had piss poor luck. Now lets begin."
#61 to #34
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tropenthatshtup (01/04/2016) [-] I like this, a lot. Can I quote this to friends both irl and online?
#64 to #61
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wraithguard (01/04/2016) [-] No, and you're not allowed to illegally download music or games either.
#100 to #64
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tropenthatshtup (01/04/2016) [-] Awwwww, guess I better pay royalties to his publishing agent then.
#77 to #28
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majestispaceduck (01/04/2016) [-] Exactly, as a level 2 "boss" encounter i had two blazing skeletons, mind you this was for 6 people so it was managable.
#21 to #8
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manofparody (01/03/2016) [-] Bad DM = Bad experience. Kick him out and elect a new one. Can't become a better DM if people don't put you in your place.
#56
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thechosentroll (01/04/2016) [-] Don't play DnD, but it reminds me an awful lot of my experience with Planetside.
Day 1: "OK, gonna play it nice and safe. I don't want to bring my team down by doing dumb **** and killing everyone."
Yesterday: Spent 5 minutes trying to calculate if my tank could reach a high enough speed to launch itself off a cliff and shoot a Scythe point blank Black Lagoon-style. Pulled it off and only ran over two teammates and squished another with the landing. It was glorious.
Day 1: "OK, gonna play it nice and safe. I don't want to bring my team down by doing dumb **** and killing everyone."
Yesterday: Spent 5 minutes trying to calculate if my tank could reach a high enough speed to launch itself off a cliff and shoot a Scythe point blank Black Lagoon-style. Pulled it off and only ran over two teammates and squished another with the landing. It was glorious.
#43
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keroberios (01/04/2016) [-]
>Party makes it through the whole game from beginning to end. Some close calls, but no deaths surprisingly.
>After wading through hoards of enemies they manage to get to the center of down where BBEG, a Lv20 Blackguard and His Lv17 Wizard and Lv15 cleric await the coming of their god into the mortal realm.
>BBEG faces them down. "I knew it would be you guys. You just cant keep-"
>Party rogue interrupts him. "I activate the amulet of timestop I found in that ruin." Works once for 1d4 rounds, then burns itself out. They got a lucky roll. Gets a 3.
>Round 1 - Shadow hop behind BBEG, has **** to make it a move action. Takes already drawn bow, Manyshot, Splitting, +Sneak. Arrows leave bow and hang lifelessly in the air, because stopped time.
>Round 2 - Rapid shot, Splitting, +Sneak
>Round 3 - Rapid shot, Splitting, +Sneak
>Time starts again. BBEG gets ******** of arrows in the back, destroying his AC because buffs+back attack+surprise. Falls face down on the ground, dead.
>I play the GM fiat card and have half-summoned god be godly and res him because **** you, you do not beat my BBEG in the first characters surprise round.
>Party looks at me. Ohnoyoufcukingdidnt.png. Party is a team of hoarders, they've kept basically every magical mcguffin they've ever found since day one. Start pulling out all kinds of vague magical items.
>Long story short. BBEG spent more time unable to fight back, stunned, sickened, negative levels, STR reduced to 1, crushed under his own armor.
>Wizard is a smear of blood on the ground.
>Cleric isn't even in the same plane anymore.
>They take BBEG's greatsword which has a rod of immobility enbedded in the hilt. Stab BBEG through the back pinning him to the ground. Activate immobility. Then give him every way to regen health they had on hand to make him suffer through the passive damage of having a ******* sword in your chest.
>Broke the shrine to the god, stopping the summon.
>Hung out waiting for kings of nearby kingdoms to show up to show him what they'd done to their worst enemy of the last 50+ years. Took turns pissiing on BBEG's head as they waited.
>Kings, and Queens show up. Party is waiting. "Oh, thank you for reclaiming this land. What could we possibly-"
>Party has spent the last 2 years real time assisting these people time and time again. They have gained a lot of renown for their prowess.
>"We;re taking it."
>"What?"
>" We.re taking it. This land is ours now." Party leader points to BBEG suffering in a pool of his own blood and weakness. "He's stronger than all of you and your best men combined. Let him for ever be a reminder of what happens when someone ***** with us. We would also like to remind you we, indavidually, are wearing the relative worth of most of your kingdoms in enchanted **** . Expect trade negotiations to end by the end of next week."
And that is the story of how my party of renown heroes basically took over an entire continent in less than a minute. To get back at me for bringing back a BBEG with a GM fiat.
>After wading through hoards of enemies they manage to get to the center of down where BBEG, a Lv20 Blackguard and His Lv17 Wizard and Lv15 cleric await the coming of their god into the mortal realm.
>BBEG faces them down. "I knew it would be you guys. You just cant keep-"
>Party rogue interrupts him. "I activate the amulet of timestop I found in that ruin." Works once for 1d4 rounds, then burns itself out. They got a lucky roll. Gets a 3.
>Round 1 - Shadow hop behind BBEG, has **** to make it a move action. Takes already drawn bow, Manyshot, Splitting, +Sneak. Arrows leave bow and hang lifelessly in the air, because stopped time.
>Round 2 - Rapid shot, Splitting, +Sneak
>Round 3 - Rapid shot, Splitting, +Sneak
>Time starts again. BBEG gets ******** of arrows in the back, destroying his AC because buffs+back attack+surprise. Falls face down on the ground, dead.
>I play the GM fiat card and have half-summoned god be godly and res him because **** you, you do not beat my BBEG in the first characters surprise round.
>Party looks at me. Ohnoyoufcukingdidnt.png. Party is a team of hoarders, they've kept basically every magical mcguffin they've ever found since day one. Start pulling out all kinds of vague magical items.
>Long story short. BBEG spent more time unable to fight back, stunned, sickened, negative levels, STR reduced to 1, crushed under his own armor.
>Wizard is a smear of blood on the ground.
>Cleric isn't even in the same plane anymore.
>They take BBEG's greatsword which has a rod of immobility enbedded in the hilt. Stab BBEG through the back pinning him to the ground. Activate immobility. Then give him every way to regen health they had on hand to make him suffer through the passive damage of having a ******* sword in your chest.
>Broke the shrine to the god, stopping the summon.
>Hung out waiting for kings of nearby kingdoms to show up to show him what they'd done to their worst enemy of the last 50+ years. Took turns pissiing on BBEG's head as they waited.
>Kings, and Queens show up. Party is waiting. "Oh, thank you for reclaiming this land. What could we possibly-"
>Party has spent the last 2 years real time assisting these people time and time again. They have gained a lot of renown for their prowess.
>"We;re taking it."
>"What?"
>" We.re taking it. This land is ours now." Party leader points to BBEG suffering in a pool of his own blood and weakness. "He's stronger than all of you and your best men combined. Let him for ever be a reminder of what happens when someone ***** with us. We would also like to remind you we, indavidually, are wearing the relative worth of most of your kingdoms in enchanted **** . Expect trade negotiations to end by the end of next week."
And that is the story of how my party of renown heroes basically took over an entire continent in less than a minute. To get back at me for bringing back a BBEG with a GM fiat.
#84 to #83
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keroberios (01/04/2016) [-]
Big Bad Evil Guy. Usually used to refer to the main antagonist of a campaign.
#51 to #43
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lolollo ONLINE (01/04/2016) [-] That's when you make it backfire. All intimidations fail. They kill people because they're basically tyrants now, but best case scenario, you sneak a resistance in to royally **** them up. Worst case scenario "you killed everyone and are now alone...forever...enjoy eternity".
You're the GM, ******* act like it...make it bite them in the ass.
You're the GM, ******* act like it...make it bite them in the ass.
#113 to #51
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chemicaltamer (01/04/2016) [-]
Or, alternatively, he could let them have their victory, and then say this massive conquest means their characters have retired from adventuring in order to oversee their new empire.
Then he could run a new adventure where the previous party are the main antagonists.
Then he could run a new adventure where the previous party are the main antagonists.
#13 to #12
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jeffthellamaking [OP]ONLINE (01/03/2016) [-] Oh, you're like, actually called froot.
I thought that was just a nickname I had no background knowledge of.
Huh.
I thought that was just a nickname I had no background knowledge of.
Huh.
#37 to #35
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heartlessrobot (01/04/2016) [-] You were born with it fused to your waist.
It gets really annoying because if you try to sit on a rock it shoots out from under you.
It gets really annoying because if you try to sit on a rock it shoots out from under you.
#39 to #38
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heartlessrobot (01/04/2016) [-] You can't break something using something it protects against.
#40 to #39
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lathyrusvii (01/04/2016) [-] Oho, traveller, but I can break a shield with a hammer, if there are enough rocks. Point is...
#41 to #40
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heartlessrobot (01/04/2016) [-] You can break a regular shield with a hammer, but you cannot break a shield with 100% blunt damage immunity using a hammer.
#42 to #41
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lathyrusvii (01/04/2016) [-] I don't think you understand the power wielded by a DM. He's like... host on an online game; if someone dies according to host calculations, that's the one everyone else gets.
That's what the joke is. If you want to argue with an actual DM, go find the local mayor and tell him he can't do his job. I quit, though.
That's what the joke is. If you want to argue with an actual DM, go find the local mayor and tell him he can't do his job. I quit, though.
#44 to #42
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heartlessrobot (01/04/2016) [-] Yeah DMs have absolute powers, but if a DM wants to keep being DM, they should try to avoid being a dick.
And the difference between DM and Mayor is you can kick the DM out of your mothers basement.
And the difference between DM and Mayor is you can kick the DM out of your mothers basement.
#45 to #44
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lathyrusvii (01/04/2016) [-] =________________________= Are you this droll irl or what.
#46 to #45
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heartlessrobot (01/04/2016) [-] Eh, I don't see the fun in perma-killing a party. If you're getting bored just hand out character sheets and start a over, you don't have to tear up the old ones, you might want to go back to them some time.
#49 to #46
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lathyrusvii (01/04/2016) [-] I get your point. Pointedly, I get your point. You don't seem to get mine, though.
Further, where do you want this conversation to go? I was going to be done because you were single-minded about a particular axiom, but now I just want to know where you think this conversation can go from here.
Do you want to talk about DM fiat? Would you like to share DnD stories? What's your aim, man?
Further, where do you want this conversation to go? I was going to be done because you were single-minded about a particular axiom, but now I just want to know where you think this conversation can go from here.
Do you want to talk about DM fiat? Would you like to share DnD stories? What's your aim, man?
#78 to #50
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majestispaceduck (01/04/2016) [-] Oi cunt, im fine with player suggestions, however if i get straight up called a dick for a very manageable fight i will become a dick.
#3
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malhaloc ONLINE (01/03/2016) [-] Or that could just be your standard tryhard. I've got a friend who's been playing longer than I have and he's subscribed to the mentality that Player = Main Character= Plot Armor. So he intentionally does stupid **** like this instead of playing the game.
Me: I'm going to check down this hallway for traps or other dangers.
Anon: I go running down the hall into the next room.
Me: You're an Elf Wizard. Your CON mod is in the negatives. If this game didn't have a minimum 1 max HP, you'd be dead on creation.
Anon: I go running down the hall into the next room.
Me: *Facepalm*
DM: Fortunately there were no traps, at least none that were set off. As you enter the next room you see a bunch of Orc Berserkers. And they're not happy.
Next thing our characters heard was the bloody screaming of our dumbass Wizard. The next thing we the players heard was the frustrated ranting of a dumbass who thinks PCs should be immortal because plot.
Me: I'm going to check down this hallway for traps or other dangers.
Anon: I go running down the hall into the next room.
Me: You're an Elf Wizard. Your CON mod is in the negatives. If this game didn't have a minimum 1 max HP, you'd be dead on creation.
Anon: I go running down the hall into the next room.
Me: *Facepalm*
DM: Fortunately there were no traps, at least none that were set off. As you enter the next room you see a bunch of Orc Berserkers. And they're not happy.
Next thing our characters heard was the bloody screaming of our dumbass Wizard. The next thing we the players heard was the frustrated ranting of a dumbass who thinks PCs should be immortal because plot.
#19 to #3
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beasert (01/03/2016) [-] I played with a guy that fell into both categories. He was always researching obscure ways to power up his character or cheat death. This went on for two years and he constantly fooled the other players into thinking he was making new characters, but NOPE! It was his bloody drow bard in disguise, stealing the loot and ditching the adventure when discovered!
He made it to level 14 in D&D 2nd edition using this tactic.
He made it to level 14 in D&D 2nd edition using this tactic.
#29 to #27
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beasert (01/04/2016) [-] He didn't need to. No one ever called him out on it for some reason.
But I eventually got him.
Him and I happened to be the best players at the table; we played smart and were willing to take risks, so the DM loved us. Since I was going to be moving away soon, he offered to write a mini adventure for our two favourite characters. He, of course, picked his drow, Sylph, because it was technically his only character. I picked my halfling rogue, Pip.
The quest revolved around the drow's back story of wanting to overthrow a demon queen, Lolth. I happened to have an old halfling barbarian who was captured by her years ago with another group so I made it my job to rescue him. Into the Abyss we went, gathered an army of demon's, located the queen and rushed off to fight her. But Lolth is a lover of treachery and our whole army was really working for her.
So, Sylph and Pip were standing before a demon queen alone. The drow player saw this as the end and, being a good friend, asked me out of character if I wanted to do one last charge for glory. I said yes. We rolled initiative and I went first.
I casted Hold Person on Sylph.
Then, I offered to execute this nuisance to the demon queen in exchange for my barbarian.
The drow player, completely blindsided as I play exclusively good guys, is fuming.
The DM this this is hilarious, agrees, and I walk out of that hellscape with two characters.
But I eventually got him.
Him and I happened to be the best players at the table; we played smart and were willing to take risks, so the DM loved us. Since I was going to be moving away soon, he offered to write a mini adventure for our two favourite characters. He, of course, picked his drow, Sylph, because it was technically his only character. I picked my halfling rogue, Pip.
The quest revolved around the drow's back story of wanting to overthrow a demon queen, Lolth. I happened to have an old halfling barbarian who was captured by her years ago with another group so I made it my job to rescue him. Into the Abyss we went, gathered an army of demon's, located the queen and rushed off to fight her. But Lolth is a lover of treachery and our whole army was really working for her.
So, Sylph and Pip were standing before a demon queen alone. The drow player saw this as the end and, being a good friend, asked me out of character if I wanted to do one last charge for glory. I said yes. We rolled initiative and I went first.
I casted Hold Person on Sylph.
Then, I offered to execute this nuisance to the demon queen in exchange for my barbarian.
The drow player, completely blindsided as I play exclusively good guys, is fuming.
The DM this this is hilarious, agrees, and I walk out of that hellscape with two characters.
#118 to #29
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tropenthatshtup (01/04/2016) [-] I'm a little late to the party but that sounds great.
I don't get why she didn't kill you too though, since you were kinda right in front of her.
Was she less, "kill everyone ever" evil and more "I rule by whatever gets the job done" and sometimea goodish evil.
I don't get why she didn't kill you too though, since you were kinda right in front of her.
Was she less, "kill everyone ever" evil and more "I rule by whatever gets the job done" and sometimea goodish evil.
#123 to #118
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beasert (01/04/2016) [-] She thought the betrayal, built up with a straight face and no clue over a period of two adventures (and several real life weeks) was too good to not reward.
Sylph and his player completely trusted me and and Pip, and suspected nothing because they always felt invincible. They had an escape plan for anything an adventure might thrown at them. He never considered another player fighting him with anything but brute force. And then I killed his character with him unable to fight back.
Lolth, lore wise, loves that stuff, and my plan actually banked heavily on it.
Sylph and his player completely trusted me and and Pip, and suspected nothing because they always felt invincible. They had an escape plan for anything an adventure might thrown at them. He never considered another player fighting him with anything but brute force. And then I killed his character with him unable to fight back.
Lolth, lore wise, loves that stuff, and my plan actually banked heavily on it.
#124 to #123
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tropenthatshtup (01/04/2016) [-] Ooh, I love it when a betrayal is more reliant on lore than just mechanics. Nice job.
Also that completely makes sense now, I never bother to learn deities or royalties in, well, anything.
Games, books, movies. I just get to confused.
I have a small story about that that kinda emphasizes that but it doesn't have the most satisfying ending.
Also that completely makes sense now, I never bother to learn deities or royalties in, well, anything.
Games, books, movies. I just get to confused.
I have a small story about that that kinda emphasizes that but it doesn't have the most satisfying ending.
#131 to #125
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tropenthatshtup (01/05/2016) [-] Also, one of my friends that reads a lot usually makes fun of me for forgetting really easy character names and remembering the names that sound funny or are super long.
Like l'll forget King George, Lord Sally and Prince Greg, because all they do is talk about things while advancing the plot, even if it is super interesting to me.
But I remember Durine, Slartibartfast, and Algernon simply because the a sentence like "And Durine slashed at the air in front of him, daring the goblin to come closer." will stick in my mind.
What I'm trying to say is, I'll usually remember and appreciate both characters and their contributions, but unless they shoot a thing or almost die for some reason, their name is Mudd to me.
Like l'll forget King George, Lord Sally and Prince Greg, because all they do is talk about things while advancing the plot, even if it is super interesting to me.
But I remember Durine, Slartibartfast, and Algernon simply because the a sentence like "And Durine slashed at the air in front of him, daring the goblin to come closer." will stick in my mind.
What I'm trying to say is, I'll usually remember and appreciate both characters and their contributions, but unless they shoot a thing or almost die for some reason, their name is Mudd to me.
#130 to #125
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tropenthatshtup (01/05/2016) [-] It's not really about a game, its about my failure to recognize characters.
Here we go I guess.
I read the walking dead comics but I'm only up to number 8 or 9 because they are expensive. Im a fan of big old physical copies and I buy the chapters.
My friends watch the walking dead on TV, and I don't and have almost no idea what's going on at any given time in the series.
So there is a character, I dont remember his name so I'll call him Rick Grimes.
Im absolutely positive it wasn't the actual Rick, because Rick is Rick and even I can see that. but lets call him Rick Grimes to prevent spoilers.
So one night we are watching the show and I ask my friends who this character is and they say it's Rick and too shut up and watch.
I say, " I don't remember Rick, where did they first meet him." And they tell me where and I instantly recognize him.
In a moment of pure genius I blurt out.
"Oh that Rick, the one that dies in the comic!"
My friends flip their **** and pause the episode just to yell at me.
When they finally calm down, I bring up the several points.
1. The show doesn't follow the comics.
2. Rick died when they went to "Germany", and since they are already in " Spain" now which happened after "Germany" and he is still alive they probably chose not to kill him at all.
3. I mean, come on, how often do they actual kill main characters.
To point three they quickly responded with "All the time! Have you even seen the show?" I admitted that I hadn't.
They were right though, in the comic Rick died pretty cheaply. And it's not like I read the walking dead for the baddass survivalists.
I felt like an asshole so I shut up for the rest of the episode.
But I wasn't free yet.
During that particular episode,(and later in the ones to follow) Rick almost dies more than anyone I've ever seen in a show. 5 times is what I remember.
I don't just mean like he jokingly "played" with a zombie or pranked someone in his group pretending to be dead. I mean he had the most dangerous zombies at his throat and barely held then away by inches. Or worse, he would get surrounded and there would be a dramatic stall to attract attention to how screwed he was.
And every ******* time he almost died, my friends turned to me and said "Thanks a lot asshole, you killed Rick!"
For anyone who has seen the show and is wondering, I totally forgot which character it actually was, and I sure as **** don't remember which episode we were watching. I also don't even care if they are still alive. I'm too embarrassed to check.
It might be pretty obvious if you read the comics though. Might be, Its been a while since I read them myself but you know.
Here we go I guess.
I read the walking dead comics but I'm only up to number 8 or 9 because they are expensive. Im a fan of big old physical copies and I buy the chapters.
My friends watch the walking dead on TV, and I don't and have almost no idea what's going on at any given time in the series.
So there is a character, I dont remember his name so I'll call him Rick Grimes.
Im absolutely positive it wasn't the actual Rick, because Rick is Rick and even I can see that. but lets call him Rick Grimes to prevent spoilers.
So one night we are watching the show and I ask my friends who this character is and they say it's Rick and too shut up and watch.
I say, " I don't remember Rick, where did they first meet him." And they tell me where and I instantly recognize him.
In a moment of pure genius I blurt out.
"Oh that Rick, the one that dies in the comic!"
My friends flip their **** and pause the episode just to yell at me.
When they finally calm down, I bring up the several points.
1. The show doesn't follow the comics.
2. Rick died when they went to "Germany", and since they are already in " Spain" now which happened after "Germany" and he is still alive they probably chose not to kill him at all.
3. I mean, come on, how often do they actual kill main characters.
To point three they quickly responded with "All the time! Have you even seen the show?" I admitted that I hadn't.
They were right though, in the comic Rick died pretty cheaply. And it's not like I read the walking dead for the baddass survivalists.
I felt like an asshole so I shut up for the rest of the episode.
But I wasn't free yet.
During that particular episode,(and later in the ones to follow) Rick almost dies more than anyone I've ever seen in a show. 5 times is what I remember.
I don't just mean like he jokingly "played" with a zombie or pranked someone in his group pretending to be dead. I mean he had the most dangerous zombies at his throat and barely held then away by inches. Or worse, he would get surrounded and there would be a dramatic stall to attract attention to how screwed he was.
And every ******* time he almost died, my friends turned to me and said "Thanks a lot asshole, you killed Rick!"
For anyone who has seen the show and is wondering, I totally forgot which character it actually was, and I sure as **** don't remember which episode we were watching. I also don't even care if they are still alive. I'm too embarrassed to check.
It might be pretty obvious if you read the comics though. Might be, Its been a while since I read them myself but you know.
#119 to #118
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tropenthatshtup (01/04/2016) [-] Oh, I forgot she was a demon.
I guess that kinda makes sense, demons in fantasy confuse me too much.
I guess that kinda makes sense, demons in fantasy confuse me too much.
#33
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klina (01/04/2016) [-] >when people want to fight the obviously ominous character that's obviously a higher level and will anihilate our anuses if we try to
#48 to #33
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angrybacteria (01/04/2016) [-] The issue is that new players often think like they are playing a video game "If I can see it, then it must be killable". Veteran players are the opposite: jumpy and scared of everything that could possibly be threatening. even children. especially children
#53 to #48
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holycrapimacupcake (01/04/2016) [-] dude in my experience children are actually giant ******* serpent demons wearing a childs skin always run from children
#68
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Stevethewizard (01/04/2016) [-]
Really don't have much in the way of "horror stories", but I figured I might as well tell the tale of an old character of mine.
This was over a decade ago, and I don't have my character sheet anymore, but this was 2nd Edition, so quite a bit of stuff was improved by the DM.
So, game starts up, my character is cooking his lunch (Druid, so in the middle of the ******* woods, obviously, because the DM ******* hated the cliche "You all are in a tavern" opening), minding his own business, when suddenly, about eight dogs approach, chasing down an Elf (the Wizard). I see this **** happening, I climb a tree and pull out my sling, start sniping off the dogs, until I roll a 1 and my sling rips in two. By that point, though, the commotion we've raised attracted a nearby aspiring knight (the Fighter) and a Kinder (the Thief), who decided to get involved for training and relief from boredom (respectively, of course), and the four of us have effectively wiped out the dogs... when the owner of said dogs (the Ranger, who's the GMPC) shows up, and demands to know what the hell is going on. Wizard immediately shouts off self-defense, which the Ranger acknowledges as a distinct possibility, since he was still training the half-wild dogs... when suddenly, the giant rats that Ranger's dogs were supposed to be hunting showed up. Literally dozens of them.
So, Ranger pulls out his bow, Fighter pulls out his greatsword, Wizard pulls out a knife, I pick up a stick to use as a club (it was allowed by the DM, mostly because my only other weapon broke), and Thief... is nowhere to be seen. This seems kind of odd, but I'm apparently the only one that noticed, in-character, that the Thief is gone, so I don't say a damn thing, and hope for the best.
Now, a bit of background for those unfamiliar with the Kinder. They're technically a Halfling sub-species, who aren't simply short, but appear to be young humans. Add to it their natural curiosity and their predisposition toward picking up literally anything they find and putting it in their pocket for later investigation, and you'll see why Thief is their race's Preferred Class.
So, we're fighting off dozens of rats, when suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, a somewhat large dog comes charging in, picks up a rat and shakes it violently, snapping its neck. On the dog's back, there's the Thief. Apparently, she used a bit of her starting money to purchase a riding dog, because non-standard mounts were a thing back in 2nd Edition.
Short battle made shorter, we finish off all but one of the rats, which I appear to have managed to charm with Charm Creature, and said giant rat is now my animal companion. Wizard realizes that if he had summoned his familiar, this would've been over faster, and Ranger states that if I had put out my cooking fire, the smell of the food wouldn't have drawn in the rats in the first place.
Things only get weirder from here.
This was over a decade ago, and I don't have my character sheet anymore, but this was 2nd Edition, so quite a bit of stuff was improved by the DM.
So, game starts up, my character is cooking his lunch (Druid, so in the middle of the ******* woods, obviously, because the DM ******* hated the cliche "You all are in a tavern" opening), minding his own business, when suddenly, about eight dogs approach, chasing down an Elf (the Wizard). I see this **** happening, I climb a tree and pull out my sling, start sniping off the dogs, until I roll a 1 and my sling rips in two. By that point, though, the commotion we've raised attracted a nearby aspiring knight (the Fighter) and a Kinder (the Thief), who decided to get involved for training and relief from boredom (respectively, of course), and the four of us have effectively wiped out the dogs... when the owner of said dogs (the Ranger, who's the GMPC) shows up, and demands to know what the hell is going on. Wizard immediately shouts off self-defense, which the Ranger acknowledges as a distinct possibility, since he was still training the half-wild dogs... when suddenly, the giant rats that Ranger's dogs were supposed to be hunting showed up. Literally dozens of them.
So, Ranger pulls out his bow, Fighter pulls out his greatsword, Wizard pulls out a knife, I pick up a stick to use as a club (it was allowed by the DM, mostly because my only other weapon broke), and Thief... is nowhere to be seen. This seems kind of odd, but I'm apparently the only one that noticed, in-character, that the Thief is gone, so I don't say a damn thing, and hope for the best.
Now, a bit of background for those unfamiliar with the Kinder. They're technically a Halfling sub-species, who aren't simply short, but appear to be young humans. Add to it their natural curiosity and their predisposition toward picking up literally anything they find and putting it in their pocket for later investigation, and you'll see why Thief is their race's Preferred Class.
So, we're fighting off dozens of rats, when suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, a somewhat large dog comes charging in, picks up a rat and shakes it violently, snapping its neck. On the dog's back, there's the Thief. Apparently, she used a bit of her starting money to purchase a riding dog, because non-standard mounts were a thing back in 2nd Edition.
Short battle made shorter, we finish off all but one of the rats, which I appear to have managed to charm with Charm Creature, and said giant rat is now my animal companion. Wizard realizes that if he had summoned his familiar, this would've been over faster, and Ranger states that if I had put out my cooking fire, the smell of the food wouldn't have drawn in the rats in the first place.
Things only get weirder from here.
#109 to #101
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Stevethewizard (01/04/2016) [-]
Alright.
Again, more than 10 years ago, and typing this from memory, without any unimportant bits. May not be fully historically accurate.
So, after all the dust settles from the campaign intro, I'm talking to Ranger, getting **** smoothed out (apparently I was the only one who rolled a decent Charisma) so we'd be able to pick up the next bit of plot from him. Apparently, the rats were just another in a long series of ****** things to happen to a nearby kingdom. They were looking for people to set out to find and resolve the root of the problem, and, as such, they were holding a "test of heroes" (read: tryout to find people who can take on tough **** ) in a few weeks. So, we set about heading toward town.
Once we get there, Thief ducks out for a bit (she's apparently a member of a rather large Thieves Guild that's active in the area), and the rest of us head to a tavern to try to pick up some food, drink, and possible work. It's here that I dropped the ball by asking if a room and board would run at more than one gold a night.
This was back in 2nd Edition, where 1 Gold was more than the average person would see in their lifetime. I was unaware of this at the time, and paid one gold for one day's room and board (to be fair, my guy was a ******* Druid. He doesn't exactly know how much stuff costs, because he doesn't live in town).
So, I sit down for a meal, because I realized that I missed my lunch, and I'm getting hungry. Stuff shows up, and I get a feeling I shouldn't trust it, so I cast Purify Food/Drink on it, because this was 2nd Edition, where that was a spell. I eat the now purified food, and Thief shows up. Thief lets us all know she "told [her] friends all about [us], and that we're safe here, because [her] friends are watching" (translation: since we're with a registered member of the biggest guild in the area, we're under guild protection in town).
Also, her "friends" apparently know about a problem outside of town... a group of orcs and goblins have been hitting merchants who've been passing through the area, and they aren't even trying to get in touch with the guild to give them a cut of the action.
So, we take it upon ourselves to take care of the bandits. Long story short, we end up rescuing a half-orc Cleric (PC who's around for about two sessions, then never shows up again) who they were holding prisoner, take down the boss bandit (who has a few magical trinkets amassed, and a fair bit of gold and weaponry), and come back to town as well-liked people.
Few days later, we head from town to the castle town, where the trial is being held. There's a big market set up, and I go around looking at stuff, seeing if anything catches my eye. Fortunately, I've managed to drag the Wizard along with me, and he picked up a Ring of Magic Detection (it also allows him to determine what kind of magic is affecting things), so we're able to sort out the **** from the genuinely good stuff. Lo and behold, we find an enchanted Scimitar of Speed, which is ******* perfect for me, which is good because at this point I'm literally the only one without any enchanted gear. Guy selling it knows it's magic, but doesn't know what it's worth, so we're able to get it for 30 gold.
Meanwhile, **** happens, Thief sells off a magical trinket she picked off the Fighter for a necklace... and when she puts it on, she ******* disappears and is replaced by a different Kinder (Thief's player's old character from a campaign she played way before I met her), henceforth known as Kinder (I don't remember what class it was. Iirc, it was multiclassed Thief and Cleric). Fighter is ******* furious about that, but he didn't let Wizard ID the damn thing, and it was a red orb that could move on its own, which is never a good sign, so Wizard and I are thinking it's a good thing it's gone.
So, after that, sidequest happens, we meet a crystaline dragon, we find out that Kinder apparently both speaks Draconic and has a baby crystal dragon as a companion...
Will continue.
Again, more than 10 years ago, and typing this from memory, without any unimportant bits. May not be fully historically accurate.
So, after all the dust settles from the campaign intro, I'm talking to Ranger, getting **** smoothed out (apparently I was the only one who rolled a decent Charisma) so we'd be able to pick up the next bit of plot from him. Apparently, the rats were just another in a long series of ****** things to happen to a nearby kingdom. They were looking for people to set out to find and resolve the root of the problem, and, as such, they were holding a "test of heroes" (read: tryout to find people who can take on tough **** ) in a few weeks. So, we set about heading toward town.
Once we get there, Thief ducks out for a bit (she's apparently a member of a rather large Thieves Guild that's active in the area), and the rest of us head to a tavern to try to pick up some food, drink, and possible work. It's here that I dropped the ball by asking if a room and board would run at more than one gold a night.
This was back in 2nd Edition, where 1 Gold was more than the average person would see in their lifetime. I was unaware of this at the time, and paid one gold for one day's room and board (to be fair, my guy was a ******* Druid. He doesn't exactly know how much stuff costs, because he doesn't live in town).
So, I sit down for a meal, because I realized that I missed my lunch, and I'm getting hungry. Stuff shows up, and I get a feeling I shouldn't trust it, so I cast Purify Food/Drink on it, because this was 2nd Edition, where that was a spell. I eat the now purified food, and Thief shows up. Thief lets us all know she "told [her] friends all about [us], and that we're safe here, because [her] friends are watching" (translation: since we're with a registered member of the biggest guild in the area, we're under guild protection in town).
Also, her "friends" apparently know about a problem outside of town... a group of orcs and goblins have been hitting merchants who've been passing through the area, and they aren't even trying to get in touch with the guild to give them a cut of the action.
So, we take it upon ourselves to take care of the bandits. Long story short, we end up rescuing a half-orc Cleric (PC who's around for about two sessions, then never shows up again) who they were holding prisoner, take down the boss bandit (who has a few magical trinkets amassed, and a fair bit of gold and weaponry), and come back to town as well-liked people.
Few days later, we head from town to the castle town, where the trial is being held. There's a big market set up, and I go around looking at stuff, seeing if anything catches my eye. Fortunately, I've managed to drag the Wizard along with me, and he picked up a Ring of Magic Detection (it also allows him to determine what kind of magic is affecting things), so we're able to sort out the **** from the genuinely good stuff. Lo and behold, we find an enchanted Scimitar of Speed, which is ******* perfect for me, which is good because at this point I'm literally the only one without any enchanted gear. Guy selling it knows it's magic, but doesn't know what it's worth, so we're able to get it for 30 gold.
Meanwhile, **** happens, Thief sells off a magical trinket she picked off the Fighter for a necklace... and when she puts it on, she ******* disappears and is replaced by a different Kinder (Thief's player's old character from a campaign she played way before I met her), henceforth known as Kinder (I don't remember what class it was. Iirc, it was multiclassed Thief and Cleric). Fighter is ******* furious about that, but he didn't let Wizard ID the damn thing, and it was a red orb that could move on its own, which is never a good sign, so Wizard and I are thinking it's a good thing it's gone.
So, after that, sidequest happens, we meet a crystaline dragon, we find out that Kinder apparently both speaks Draconic and has a baby crystal dragon as a companion...
Will continue.
#112 to #109
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Stevethewizard (01/04/2016) [-]
Then the trials start up.
First up is Fighter. He's up against a Dire Lion. Fight lasts about 3 rounds, Fighter emerges unscathed.
Next, me. Giant Snake. And when I say "giant", I mean 40 feet long, aggressive, and apparently venomous, if the fangs were anything to believe. Fortunately, the Scimitar gave me some insane bonuses and two more attacks per round. It lasted my half of the first turn, due to my third attack being a critical.
Next is Ranger. He's up against a manticore. It doesn't even get close before he lands a headshot and takes it out.
Then, Wizard. He's up against a Griffon. Couple rounds of Magic Missile later, it's down.
I don't remember Kinder's fight. I think she wasn't able to register, yet somehow managed to sneak past and get to the rest of us when we were regrouped as the only ones who passed the trials... then, we were told the "true secret" of the trials.
Apparently, the Court Wizard had somehow recently betrayed the royal family and driven them mad. We were to track him down and find a way to reverse this curse.
To aid us in doing this, we're granted access to the royal armory, and told we can each take one thing.
I grab a cloak made of an animal hide I don't recognize, put it on, and immediately, everyone looks three feet to my right and asks me how I moved there so fast (Cloak of Displacement), Ranger grabs a Cowl of True Sight, Fighter grabs a sword (apparently both holy and enchanted), Kinder is told she's not allowed in (and actually follows the rules), and Wizard looks through a box of rings, and picks one at random.
So, we're tracking down our first lead, and we run into some ogres. Wizard gets taken down, but not killed. Other than that, we do just fine. Wizard gets discouraged, says, I **** you not, "I wish I would just heal on my own, and that nobody would have to waste their time healing me."
Suddenly, the ring he picked out starts glowing, and a new ring appears on his hand. Wizard uses the last full charge on the Ring of Detect Magic to ID the new ring. It's a Cursed Ring of Regeneration. He can't take it off, and as long as he's wearing it, he'll heal from any wound, even fatal wounds. He's also an Elf, so this effectively renders him immortal.
So, we now know two things: Wizard is immortal, and he has a Ring of Wishing with an unknown number of charges. This was news to everyone but the DM, since the ring's effect was rolled for.
So, instead of wishing for a cure like a rational person would at this point, we keep going with the lure of a bigger reward at the end of all this. We keep following lead after lead, and eventually end up at a run-down looking shack with what the Wizard recognizes as some crude magical instruments. Kinder finds a hidden door, and we go downstairs, where we see... ourselves, or rather, doppelgangers of us. We fight our own doppelgangers, take them out (really easy to do when you're geared the **** up), and then I notice that my Giant Rat has run off, and is shaking violently... And turning more and more humanoid. Suddenly, Wizard starts smiling, and telling us all not to panic, he recognizes this guy as an old friend. Unfortunately for the Were-Rat, we all passed our check to know that this is being coerced by magic. Combat ensues, Ranger can't land a shot, I get in a few hits, Wizard is stuck not being able to actually cast anything because he's telling us not to fight, and Fighter got knocked out by a spell for two rounds. Fighter gets back up, obviously upset, and throws his sword at the Were-Rat. It hits, hilt end on the ******** forehead, knocking him out. Wizard can now talk again, and immediately casts Polymorph on the unconscious Were-Rat, who turns into a cricket. Fortunately for us, Kinder happens to have a perfectly-sized jar to keep our prisoner in as we report back to the head of the King's Guard. Apparently, the Were-Rat was the court wizard, who was secretly in an alliance with the doppelgangers for the sole purpose of ******* with people.
More?
First up is Fighter. He's up against a Dire Lion. Fight lasts about 3 rounds, Fighter emerges unscathed.
Next, me. Giant Snake. And when I say "giant", I mean 40 feet long, aggressive, and apparently venomous, if the fangs were anything to believe. Fortunately, the Scimitar gave me some insane bonuses and two more attacks per round. It lasted my half of the first turn, due to my third attack being a critical.
Next is Ranger. He's up against a manticore. It doesn't even get close before he lands a headshot and takes it out.
Then, Wizard. He's up against a Griffon. Couple rounds of Magic Missile later, it's down.
I don't remember Kinder's fight. I think she wasn't able to register, yet somehow managed to sneak past and get to the rest of us when we were regrouped as the only ones who passed the trials... then, we were told the "true secret" of the trials.
Apparently, the Court Wizard had somehow recently betrayed the royal family and driven them mad. We were to track him down and find a way to reverse this curse.
To aid us in doing this, we're granted access to the royal armory, and told we can each take one thing.
I grab a cloak made of an animal hide I don't recognize, put it on, and immediately, everyone looks three feet to my right and asks me how I moved there so fast (Cloak of Displacement), Ranger grabs a Cowl of True Sight, Fighter grabs a sword (apparently both holy and enchanted), Kinder is told she's not allowed in (and actually follows the rules), and Wizard looks through a box of rings, and picks one at random.
So, we're tracking down our first lead, and we run into some ogres. Wizard gets taken down, but not killed. Other than that, we do just fine. Wizard gets discouraged, says, I **** you not, "I wish I would just heal on my own, and that nobody would have to waste their time healing me."
Suddenly, the ring he picked out starts glowing, and a new ring appears on his hand. Wizard uses the last full charge on the Ring of Detect Magic to ID the new ring. It's a Cursed Ring of Regeneration. He can't take it off, and as long as he's wearing it, he'll heal from any wound, even fatal wounds. He's also an Elf, so this effectively renders him immortal.
So, we now know two things: Wizard is immortal, and he has a Ring of Wishing with an unknown number of charges. This was news to everyone but the DM, since the ring's effect was rolled for.
So, instead of wishing for a cure like a rational person would at this point, we keep going with the lure of a bigger reward at the end of all this. We keep following lead after lead, and eventually end up at a run-down looking shack with what the Wizard recognizes as some crude magical instruments. Kinder finds a hidden door, and we go downstairs, where we see... ourselves, or rather, doppelgangers of us. We fight our own doppelgangers, take them out (really easy to do when you're geared the **** up), and then I notice that my Giant Rat has run off, and is shaking violently... And turning more and more humanoid. Suddenly, Wizard starts smiling, and telling us all not to panic, he recognizes this guy as an old friend. Unfortunately for the Were-Rat, we all passed our check to know that this is being coerced by magic. Combat ensues, Ranger can't land a shot, I get in a few hits, Wizard is stuck not being able to actually cast anything because he's telling us not to fight, and Fighter got knocked out by a spell for two rounds. Fighter gets back up, obviously upset, and throws his sword at the Were-Rat. It hits, hilt end on the ******** forehead, knocking him out. Wizard can now talk again, and immediately casts Polymorph on the unconscious Were-Rat, who turns into a cricket. Fortunately for us, Kinder happens to have a perfectly-sized jar to keep our prisoner in as we report back to the head of the King's Guard. Apparently, the Were-Rat was the court wizard, who was secretly in an alliance with the doppelgangers for the sole purpose of ******* with people.
More?
#129 to #126
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Stevethewizard (01/05/2016) [-]
Alright.
So, after we find out what happened, it becomes blatantly obvious that the reason the royal family has gone insane is that they were replaced by Doppelgangers. The doppelgangers and were-rat are put down, and a provisional government is put in place, but you're probably not interested in that. We're all told to turn back in the items we were granted, then we're given one wish each (excluding the Wizard, since it's apparently obvious he already got a wish).
Fighter wishes for a horse that will be eternally loyal. A horse appears from nowhere, and it's apparently bound to him magically, meaning that no matter the circumstances, his horse will find its way back to him. Even if it's killed, it'll come back from the afterlife and start following him again.
Kinder wishes for something interesting. She's granted a magical staff that does a various number of seemingly random effects.
I wish for the most powerful sword I could wield. It appears, I grab it, and it disappears (apparently the DM hated me for actually wishing for something useful).
Ranger wished for command of a ship. Nothing happened immediately, but as soon as we left the castle proper, he's approached by a courier who hands him a document of ownership for a ship. It's revealed that it's the ship of a legacy character formerly played by the DM, who apparently ascended after his last session, and now appears when his name is spoken.
So, after finding this out by inadvertently summoning him, we set sail for nowhere in particular, mostly because we aren't exactly the best-liked people in the kingdom at the moment. Along the way, we fight a Dragon Turtle, kill it with the ship's cannons, haul it aboard, and cook it (the ship's cook is apparently a culinary genius).
We eventually get troubled by some bizarre dreams, and it's apparently apparent that it's due to the influence of vampires. We sail to the closest island, and find that the locals are apparently locked in battle with some trolls. We help them drive the trolls away, and the locals start mentioning the vampires in charge of the trolls that are the big problem, and they also mention that the vampires are somehow related to the perpetual overcast conditions on the island. They've managed to forge some silver weaponry to fight the vampires, but they know they wouldn't be a match for them.
We, being the bunch of thrill-seekers we are, take up their arms against the vampires. We make it to the mountain fortress the vampires have taken residence in, and we pretty much effortlessly walk through, lopping off vampire heads until we reach their boss.
Now, apparently, the vampire in charge of the others had been at this for a while, and had amassed quite a bit of power in his hundreds of years alive. Unfortunately for him, our team had a Druid, someone who doubles as a divine caster with a focus on nature. I used a spell to create my order's holy symbol on the floor of the room, which caused the vampire to wince in pain and be driven outside. Thinking quickly, I cast it again on the entrance to the room, to keep him outside, as Kinder activated her staff while running outside. She activated its "Change Weather" use, which randomly changes the weather to any number of possible conditions... and it started raining. Unfortunately for the vampire, it wasn't a normal rain. It was somehow raining Holy Water, which is apparently a legitimate roll for the item, as the DM made sure to roll that in the open, then show the table for the item in question.
So, the vampire started burning away, and tried to run back inside, only to find himself burning even more when he touched the door with a holy symbol on it.
So, vampires taken care of, we head back to town, where we're welcomed back as heroes for taking care of a potentially massive problem before it became one. I, of course, mention the weather situation, and ask if it'll clear up soon.
"What are you talking about? It's always like this in winter."
That was the last session.
So, after we find out what happened, it becomes blatantly obvious that the reason the royal family has gone insane is that they were replaced by Doppelgangers. The doppelgangers and were-rat are put down, and a provisional government is put in place, but you're probably not interested in that. We're all told to turn back in the items we were granted, then we're given one wish each (excluding the Wizard, since it's apparently obvious he already got a wish).
Fighter wishes for a horse that will be eternally loyal. A horse appears from nowhere, and it's apparently bound to him magically, meaning that no matter the circumstances, his horse will find its way back to him. Even if it's killed, it'll come back from the afterlife and start following him again.
Kinder wishes for something interesting. She's granted a magical staff that does a various number of seemingly random effects.
I wish for the most powerful sword I could wield. It appears, I grab it, and it disappears (apparently the DM hated me for actually wishing for something useful).
Ranger wished for command of a ship. Nothing happened immediately, but as soon as we left the castle proper, he's approached by a courier who hands him a document of ownership for a ship. It's revealed that it's the ship of a legacy character formerly played by the DM, who apparently ascended after his last session, and now appears when his name is spoken.
So, after finding this out by inadvertently summoning him, we set sail for nowhere in particular, mostly because we aren't exactly the best-liked people in the kingdom at the moment. Along the way, we fight a Dragon Turtle, kill it with the ship's cannons, haul it aboard, and cook it (the ship's cook is apparently a culinary genius).
We eventually get troubled by some bizarre dreams, and it's apparently apparent that it's due to the influence of vampires. We sail to the closest island, and find that the locals are apparently locked in battle with some trolls. We help them drive the trolls away, and the locals start mentioning the vampires in charge of the trolls that are the big problem, and they also mention that the vampires are somehow related to the perpetual overcast conditions on the island. They've managed to forge some silver weaponry to fight the vampires, but they know they wouldn't be a match for them.
We, being the bunch of thrill-seekers we are, take up their arms against the vampires. We make it to the mountain fortress the vampires have taken residence in, and we pretty much effortlessly walk through, lopping off vampire heads until we reach their boss.
Now, apparently, the vampire in charge of the others had been at this for a while, and had amassed quite a bit of power in his hundreds of years alive. Unfortunately for him, our team had a Druid, someone who doubles as a divine caster with a focus on nature. I used a spell to create my order's holy symbol on the floor of the room, which caused the vampire to wince in pain and be driven outside. Thinking quickly, I cast it again on the entrance to the room, to keep him outside, as Kinder activated her staff while running outside. She activated its "Change Weather" use, which randomly changes the weather to any number of possible conditions... and it started raining. Unfortunately for the vampire, it wasn't a normal rain. It was somehow raining Holy Water, which is apparently a legitimate roll for the item, as the DM made sure to roll that in the open, then show the table for the item in question.
So, the vampire started burning away, and tried to run back inside, only to find himself burning even more when he touched the door with a holy symbol on it.
So, vampires taken care of, we head back to town, where we're welcomed back as heroes for taking care of a potentially massive problem before it became one. I, of course, mention the weather situation, and ask if it'll clear up soon.
"What are you talking about? It's always like this in winter."
That was the last session.
#133 to #129
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karvarausku (01/05/2016) [-] **karvarausku used "*roll picture*"**
**karvarausku rolled image** not bad.
I have only had one "Real session" so far and it was year ago throu roll20 and skype.
We were group of 4 + DM.
There were me (as bard), 1 guy as paladin, 1 guy as druid and 1 guy as ranger if I recall correctly.
Anyway it was start of the pathfinder quest don't really remember what exactly, but it started with town getting invaded by goblins. Afterwards we were sent to investigate some dungeon (some mosquito boss was there) and in midst of the action when going there had funny encounter.
There was a door, and we didn't know what was behind the door so we investigated it first and there were stairs leading down where were bunch of goblins. So as paladin was front of the door I cast grease on him making his armor and himself slippery as duck and I kicked him down the stairs jumped on him and surfed him while playing lute.
The whole party was laughing how ridiculous it was and that I managed to pull it off with the rolls that DM asked. Tho the paladin wasn't that happy cause he took some dmg when he hit the goblins.
**karvarausku rolled image** not bad.
I have only had one "Real session" so far and it was year ago throu roll20 and skype.
We were group of 4 + DM.
There were me (as bard), 1 guy as paladin, 1 guy as druid and 1 guy as ranger if I recall correctly.
Anyway it was start of the pathfinder quest don't really remember what exactly, but it started with town getting invaded by goblins. Afterwards we were sent to investigate some dungeon (some mosquito boss was there) and in midst of the action when going there had funny encounter.
There was a door, and we didn't know what was behind the door so we investigated it first and there were stairs leading down where were bunch of goblins. So as paladin was front of the door I cast grease on him making his armor and himself slippery as duck and I kicked him down the stairs jumped on him and surfed him while playing lute.
The whole party was laughing how ridiculous it was and that I managed to pull it off with the rolls that DM asked. Tho the paladin wasn't that happy cause he took some dmg when he hit the goblins.
#102
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silentark (01/04/2016) [-] Reminds me of my very first campaign.
-First time playing, make up a dwarf fighter with AC18 at lvl1 DM learnt very quickly that while I was a DnD noob, years of carefully reading WH40k codexes meant I knew how to twist words and a penchant for booze and gold.
-First mission, come to a locked door with boss hiding somewhere on the other side.
-My dwarf, being of the drunken disposition decide to do what he does best; bashing **** .
Pity I wound up moving only a few weeks in, had a blast with it and nobody to play with out here.
-Roll a 3 to force the door; wind up face-planting into the door and falling down.
-Had a dick of an elf in party who though it was the best time to try piss on me while I was down.
- ******** .jpg. dex rolloff and somehow rolled 18 against 5.
-Decide to punch him in the nuts as revenge.
-Nat 20, DM tells elf to take endurance check, he rolled a 1
-Tables FW elven dick and balls are pulverised into nothing under might of sturdy dwarven steel-backed fist.
-No healing gonna bring that back.
-I be a nice sport though and buy a whore for 'Steve the dickless elf' in every large town/city we pass through.
-First time playing, make up a dwarf fighter with AC18 at lvl1 DM learnt very quickly that while I was a DnD noob, years of carefully reading WH40k codexes meant I knew how to twist words and a penchant for booze and gold.
-First mission, come to a locked door with boss hiding somewhere on the other side.
-My dwarf, being of the drunken disposition decide to do what he does best; bashing **** .
Pity I wound up moving only a few weeks in, had a blast with it and nobody to play with out here.
-Roll a 3 to force the door; wind up face-planting into the door and falling down.
-Had a dick of an elf in party who though it was the best time to try piss on me while I was down.
- ******** .jpg. dex rolloff and somehow rolled 18 against 5.
-Decide to punch him in the nuts as revenge.
-Nat 20, DM tells elf to take endurance check, he rolled a 1
-Tables FW elven dick and balls are pulverised into nothing under might of sturdy dwarven steel-backed fist.
-No healing gonna bring that back.
-I be a nice sport though and buy a whore for 'Steve the dickless elf' in every large town/city we pass through.
#111 to #108
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silentark (01/04/2016) [-] true, though got **** to do for a couple of weeks, swipe a few more rulebooks before i get back into it.
Damn it was fun though, by the time I finished I had a dwarf eldrich knight who, due to a lack of foresight on the DM's part, and some diplomacy, wound up in full platemail with a +1 shield and a +2 longsword, shield had a bear trap strapped to it we ruled it as once per fight the wielder can either deliver a 2D6+S attack OR use it as a reaction to latch onto an enemy weapon after a failed attack, effectively disarming them, plus i get to keep whatever it snags, which at that point my armour plus shield of faith for a total of 23AC, meant it happened often .
Also after he lost a bet with a wizard, he was cursed never to wear pants.
Damn it was fun though, by the time I finished I had a dwarf eldrich knight who, due to a lack of foresight on the DM's part, and some diplomacy, wound up in full platemail with a +1 shield and a +2 longsword, shield had a bear trap strapped to it we ruled it as once per fight the wielder can either deliver a 2D6+S attack OR use it as a reaction to latch onto an enemy weapon after a failed attack, effectively disarming them, plus i get to keep whatever it snags, which at that point my armour plus shield of faith for a total of 23AC, meant it happened often .
Also after he lost a bet with a wizard, he was cursed never to wear pants.
#18
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beasert (01/03/2016) [-] Obviously the black cat is a barbarian and will only take half damage on those traps anyway. The grey cat rogue was taking too long and the evil wizard was getting away.
#82
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hyperactiveman (01/04/2016) [-] Loved it when my rogue finally came online. Found every trap (soooo many traps) in the next encounter (a really suss house), trumped everything for initiative and slammed monsters with my stealth kills (soooo many d6).
... Of course that didn't stop the fighter going in the back way, falling through a trap, into the mouth of a giant maggot that ate all his gear and nearly him in the process.
... Of course that didn't stop the fighter going in the back way, falling through a trap, into the mouth of a giant maggot that ate all his gear and nearly him in the process.
#75
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titusbraovdo (01/04/2016) [-] That was me in my second group. We were going to look for treasure in a small shake that was to lead to an underground ruin. I was a dumb and i mean dumb half orc. The leader of the group a rogue wanted to scout the place out. But first thing i did was yell treasure at the top of my lungs and bash the door open. Lucky me the Dm just had a bucket of water splash down on top of me because kids played in the shack a lot. I was a disappointed wet orc that day.
#98
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alpako (01/04/2016) [-] **alpako used "*roll 1, DD Class*"**
**alpako rolls Sorcerer (Sor)***roll picture* i want to play d&d
**alpako rolls Sorcerer (Sor)***roll picture* i want to play d&d
#96
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brothergrimm ONLINE (01/04/2016) [-] I actually just had this problem with my weekly DnD ish... game tonight. Something called goddamn time-sight. They want to check every option 6 ways from ******* sunday until they know for a fact nothing can go wrong. What fun is that?
#85
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anon (01/04/2016) [-]
Be vengeful Demi-God
Start religion because a blue dragon wannabee killed my mutated donkey
Religion of revenge
Go preach it everywhere
Scribbled bible in hand
Kick in door of a gambling party in a garrison on a sneak mission
Break their table in half with my self-made bible
Ascended to godhood
Start religion because a blue dragon wannabee killed my mutated donkey
Religion of revenge
Go preach it everywhere
Scribbled bible in hand
Kick in door of a gambling party in a garrison on a sneak mission
Break their table in half with my self-made bible
Ascended to godhood
