DnD Story Time: The Grind Pt 2
i'd like to thank those who have viewed my content and liked it enough to rate it (even the red thumbing bastards), so here is the next installment of my story. hope you enjoy!
>ran out of hometown
>wizard still sore from earlier
>party still butthurt from not getting supplies for the adventure to the next town
>me, the War Priest, and the wizard are chilling in the back taking notes on what's going on (and frankly felt useless of anything else)
>rest of the party out in front waving their dicks around boasting how "we" got mad XP from the last encounter
>ranger pokes his head up and tells us we need to get the **** down
>everyone but me and wizard heard and ducked out
>"hey, where did everyone go?"
>*thuds heard from a distance*
>perception checks rolled and we spot a tarrasque ******* up trees and ****
>we're just out in the open dumbfounded
>"okay, just don't move and we'll be just fi-"
>ranger shot an arrow that hit the tarrasque
>"HOLY **** DUDE WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?"
>Ranger:"there's a pouch attached to the underbelly and i want to see what it is"
>"THAT'S PROBABLY HIS NUTSACK **** THIS I'M OUT"
>leave the party to the next town, a few people follow behind
>when we got there they were moaning about how they could have gotten more XP if we took it down (yeah guys, taking down a CR 25 is soo easy for lvl 1s. it's like shooting the exhaust port on the deathstar, super easy when you're ********************** )
>town's deserted except for the cleric guarding a spike in the ground
>made of marble
>yadda yadda talk to the guy and that spike is apparently the tip of the temple he's actually guarding
>tells us it sunk after aliens crash landed there like XX years ago
>"the temple sunk?"
>"yeah, it sunk. bloop, outta nowhere"
>oh yeah, and apparently the "aliens" are trapped in there too so we need to take them out
>*record scratch* wait wut?
>(this is where the debacle of the whole campaign started)
>ran out of hometown
>wizard still sore from earlier
>party still butthurt from not getting supplies for the adventure to the next town
>me, the War Priest, and the wizard are chilling in the back taking notes on what's going on (and frankly felt useless of anything else)
>rest of the party out in front waving their dicks around boasting how "we" got mad XP from the last encounter
>ranger pokes his head up and tells us we need to get the **** down
>everyone but me and wizard heard and ducked out
>"hey, where did everyone go?"
>*thuds heard from a distance*
>perception checks rolled and we spot a tarrasque ******* up trees and ****
>we're just out in the open dumbfounded
>"okay, just don't move and we'll be just fi-"
>ranger shot an arrow that hit the tarrasque
>"HOLY **** DUDE WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?"
>Ranger:"there's a pouch attached to the underbelly and i want to see what it is"
>"THAT'S PROBABLY HIS NUTSACK **** THIS I'M OUT"
>leave the party to the next town, a few people follow behind
>when we got there they were moaning about how they could have gotten more XP if we took it down (yeah guys, taking down a CR 25 is soo easy for lvl 1s. it's like shooting the exhaust port on the deathstar, super easy when you're ********************** )
>town's deserted except for the cleric guarding a spike in the ground
>made of marble
>yadda yadda talk to the guy and that spike is apparently the tip of the temple he's actually guarding
>tells us it sunk after aliens crash landed there like XX years ago
>"the temple sunk?"
>"yeah, it sunk. bloop, outta nowhere"
>oh yeah, and apparently the "aliens" are trapped in there too so we need to take them out
>*record scratch* wait wut?
>(this is where the debacle of the whole campaign started)
(this was my portrait for my character that i gave to the DM to whore XP)
>we start digging deeper around the spire (i guess it would appropriately be called) after a few hours in game, about halfway to the first window we hear trumpets and sirens go off in the distance.
>the other half of the group charges into the clearing on centaurs with unicorn horns glued to the warpriest's head
>my jaw drops, in and out of game because wtf kind of entrance is that?
>turns out that tarrasque i said i wasn't going to **** with had unicorn horns, and they were in the "ballsack", which was a satchel
>talked to my guys (this was all in game of course, i already knew the ******* that happened ahead of time outside) and they didn't take it down, but what the ranger shot at indeed was the satchel of horns, with remarkable aim in fact
>DM rolled for what they were worth, very high of course, and they had super magical powers (can't remember for the life of me what they were. either way, it was stupid powerful)
>the warpriest comes in and asks why we're digging the sand when we can MOVE the sand?
>(his name is Merick, and the Wizard is Boot, because my buddies who played them deserved credit for the ******* we all endured)
>so he points the unicorn horn at the ground near the spire and *POOF*
>we're 20ft above the deep of a newly created sinkhole
>10% manage to succeed on their reflex save, the ranger's like "yay!" but the cleric kicked him down there along with us anyway
>he was a dick
>and now we traverse through the underground temple. what mysteries lie ahead for our young, eager adventurers?
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> ******* aliens is what it was
thanks guys for reading again. the first part's here in case you missed it /channel/dungeons-n-drags/Dnd+story+time+the+grind+pt+1/iLmRLvY/
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