13 Rules of Gunfighting. Credit goes to CJ Grisham, an soldier of 17 years. I only made minor edits. www.businessinsider.com/cj-grishams-13-rules-of-gunfighting
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13 Rules of Gunfighting

Credit goes to CJ Grisham, an soldier of 17 years. I only made minor edits.
Feel free to add rules you think should be on the list

These Are The 13 Rules Of Gunfighting Everyone
Should Know
l) Guns have only two enemies: rust and phoneticians.
2) It' s always better be judged by 12 than carried by tr.
S) Chops carry guns pretend themselves: net you.
4) Never let someone er something that threatens yen get inside arm' s
5) Never say "I' get a gonf" If yen need use deadly f arce: the first
seend they hear should be the safety clicking eff.
6) The average Dispense time of a 911 call is 23 minutes; the response
time efa is 1400 feet per second.
7) The most important rule in a gunfight is: Always win - cheat if . f _
necessary- a - ' I
8) Make yew attacker advance through a wall of bullets _ _ _Teu may get killed with yew own gun, but
he' ll have beat yen death with it, cause it' ll be empty.
9) If in a gun fight;
If net sheeting: yen should be leading.
If net leading: yen should be miving.
If net sheeting: miving er leading: probably dead.
IO) In a life and death situation, samething_ _ _It may be wrong, but
I 1) If yen carry a gun, peeple call yen paranoid. New ense! If yen have a gun, what yen have ta be
paranoid ab out?
12) You can say ‘step’ er 'alto' er any other werd: but a large bare muzzle painted at ' s head is
pretty much a universal language.
13) Ten cannot save the planet, but yen may be able save yourself and yew family.
Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybady stands around railroading," - Themes
J eff as en
Views: 63317
Favorited: 720
Submitted: 08/26/2012
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User avatar #855 - BigDoktor (07/25/2013) [-]
You know that Jefferson quote is doing the opposite of helping your case, right?
#851 - anonymous (04/05/2013) [-]
1,000,000 Americans have died from gunshot wounds since the assassination of Martin Luther King. Need I say more!
User avatar #852 to #851 - psydoc (04/05/2013) [-]
Not unless you're tying to make a point.
#828 - anonymous (08/28/2012) [-]
It´s illegal to defend yourself with a firearm in Czech Republic (Europe). If you shoot someone in defence you can get 10 years in prison. FML
User avatar #831 to #828 - psydoc (08/28/2012) [-]
Which basically means if you have to defend yourself, you better hide the body.
User avatar #796 - aileronqt (08/27/2012) [-]
These rules are from a very selfish standpoint in my opion
User avatar #853 to #796 - psydoc (04/05/2013) [-]
1. opion

Pertaining to high opinion reminiscent of opium giving high
Due to suffering from delusions of grandeur he has an opion of himself.

(From the Urban Dictionary)
#756 - ianosity (08/27/2012) [-]
Why use guns when you can just suplex the 						****					 out of everybody?
Why use guns when you can just suplex the **** out of everybody?
User avatar #847 to #756 - zyvac (08/31/2012) [-]
what's that from? o.o
User avatar #751 - IamSofaKingdom (08/27/2012) [-]
Number 6 made me lol but I don't agree with 7. I understand protecting and surviving but I will not take a child as a human shield or commit other ********** acts to save my own life (in response to "cheat if you have to"). That is just disgusting.
#791 to #751 - locke (08/27/2012) [-]
the point is if you have a way to take advantage of your opponent, do it, also i agree with trostell, meat sheilds aren't bullet proof.
User avatar #793 to #791 - IamSofaKingdom (08/27/2012) [-]
Why is that even mentioned? I never said you would use a friggin child to block bullets. You obviously would hold onto a child to prevent the other person from firing their gun and possibly hurting a kid. If your opponent is a cop or a soldier from a primary military like England or the US then they won't fire on a child. That was the point of the statement. It is an under handed act that would be classified as cheating. Not a logical action to stop bullets with the frame of a miniature person.
#757 to #751 - trostell (08/27/2012) [-]
Cheating in a gunfight isn't the same as taking a hostage and using it as a ********** . Oftentimes, that's a bad idea, as the person shooting at you might not have reservations about shooting your hostage, and shoot through them to kill you. Contrary to popular belief, bullets often overpenetrate people, and walls. Consider instead shooting out the lightbulbs above your enemy, the shower of sparks and glass is distracting to an untrained opponent, thus giving you an advantage.
User avatar #766 to #757 - IamSofaKingdom (08/27/2012) [-]
I wouldn't consider shooting out light "cheating". If you have an advantage in the dark it just makes sense to get rid of it. I would compare that more to you using a different gun. If the enemy had an AK but you preferred an HK, it isn't cheating to use it, you just prefer that. I would consider cheating to be using physical harm to their loved ones to make then disarm themselves, or using children as shields to stop someone from firing at you. In the middle east the enemy will run into graveyards and fire at American troops because we adhere to rules of war and we will not fire onto the graves of another countries people. The enemy knows this so they take shots on troops who can't fire back. I consider that cheating.
User avatar #770 to #766 - trostell (08/27/2012) [-]
Alright, I'm going by rules that would make it a "fair" fight. You know, like in a video game. In the real world, cheating would be messing with your opponent's head. Like throwing an empty magazine out where you aren't going to move so they stick their head out to look for you. Like throwing sand in your opponent's eyes in a fist-fight.
User avatar #776 to #770 - IamSofaKingdom (08/27/2012) [-]
The problem with that comparison is that the first would be a gun fight. Utilizing your magazine once it is empty is just a tactically smart move. It is up to that other person whether or not they look, they are not physically deterred by the action, and the fight is still skill, not cheating. In the second example it is a fist fight. Introducing sand is taking an outside element and then using it to significantly reduce the opponents capabilities (his eye sight in this instance). Although I would agree to you using that as a means of getting an advantage in this seemingly non-lethal confrontation it would be "cheating". A proper comparison to the sand thing in a gunfight would have to be something like you are having a fight and there is a nearby mercenary who you shout out a monetary offer to in order for him to shoot the guy while you have him pinned or something. It is an outside aid you bring in for the unfair advantage. Depending on your stance (did you star the fight, are you just trying to survive, etc) it could be acceptable but I am not sure I would do that unless I was simply trying to survive some random maniac. I also have no idea what you mean by mentioning video games.
#782 to #776 - trostell (08/27/2012) [-]
The whole "cheating" thing is very vague, but no sane person would cheat by using another person as a meat shield. However, cheating can be literally anything that gives you an advantage your opponent can not have. If you nail your opponent in the face with a thrown stick, you have a major advantage, as your opponent is probably in pain, perhaps even losing some of his/her eyesight, and thus distracted. Again, shooting out the lights would be cheating as you're gaining an advantage your opponent can't easily counter. It's "unfair". In fact, there is little difference between cheating and good tactics. What is considered cheating by most people is called smart by those who've been through gunfights.
User avatar #789 to #782 - IamSofaKingdom (08/27/2012) [-]
Well then the problem here is that my idea of cheating is generally closer to war crimes and your idea of cheating is anything advantageous by any degree. I guess we will just be stuck disagreeing on that notion then.
User avatar #792 to #789 - trostell (08/27/2012) [-]
The thing is, I'm speaking of general rules for the common man. However, another way of cheating in a fight would be, say, blowing up their ambulance, which is a war crime, but is strategically advantageous. However, in a one-on-one gunfight, between two average people, with no military training, shooting out lights, throwing things, causing distractions, those would be considered "cheating"
User avatar #794 to #792 - IamSofaKingdom (08/27/2012) [-]
As I just said, your definition makes you consider it to be cheating but mine doesn't. You don't have to reiterate something that I already replied to. I said that in a one on one gun fight I would not consider shooting out a light unfair. In the movie Kick Ass the little girl used a strobe light to make enemies think she was somewhere she wasn't and to impair vision but she was greatly outnumbered, I don't consider her use of the light cheating.
#786 to #782 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
this cant be!!! a respectful gentlemenly intellectual arguemnt on a ********* topic like this on fj?!?!
#790 to #786 - trostell (08/27/2012) [-]
My work here is done.
My work here is done.
User avatar #848 to #790 - zyvac (08/31/2012) [-]
I ******* love that gif
#754 to #751 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
I think, in this case, 'cheat if you have to' is more or less making someone think they shot you, then when they come over to check, blow their dumb ass away.
#749 - schmegma (08/27/2012) [-]
**schmegma rolled a random image posted in comment #104 at Nooooooooooooooooo **
User avatar #747 - shadowhorn (08/27/2012) [-]
i disagree with no 5. sometimes fear can strike deeper than a bullet.
#744 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
what if no1 has a gun?
User avatar #767 to #744 - malhaloc (08/27/2012) [-]
Then the people who want to rob/kill you will
#741 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
herpy derpy, duuuuhh.... theiy took my job, herpy derpy, the guy who made this must be som army brainwhased u.s army gay.... guns are awsome herpy derpy herp..... its so stupid beening hanged up inn war like this, its childish and ******* scary.
#735 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
Let's ignore all the causes of violence and focus on inanimate objects.
#733 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
swords are cooler
#731 - Drfish (08/27/2012) [-]
Its all just one big misunderstanding they mean Fun rights not Gun rights, just a typo one letter away on the keyboard...
Its all just one big misunderstanding they mean Fun rights not Gun rights, just a typo one letter away on the keyboard...
User avatar #722 - Spavaloo (08/27/2012) [-]
Ban and melt down every gun in the world- everybody just use swords and settle your disputes with a gentlemanly duel.
#857 to #722 - anonymous (08/02/2013) [-]
User avatar #732 to #722 - psydoc (08/27/2012) [-]
China conquers the world.
#755 to #732 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
One does not simply march on moscow, regardless of numbers.
#719 - cornonthebob (08/27/2012) [-]
Its like some people think guns are the only weapons in the world.
#714 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
I live in Aus, we have guns. But we make a vital distinction some NRA indoctrinated Americans don't; guns are tools, not for self defence. One cannot buy a gun for self defence in this country, only for hunting and if you are a farmer.

But it is not he only thing that contributes to our low crime rate, we don't have an education system which is going down the drain, we have a good health and welfare system and we don't get a hardon when presented with the idea of shooting some desperate or mentally ill trespasser.

Anyway I'll get off this forum, as the only comprehensible responses I will receive from the gun toating white trash, are accusations of being a commie or pinko. Well comrades, enjoy your American utopia...
User avatar #724 to #714 - thewormking (08/27/2012) [-]
Hear, hear! Aus has plenty of problems, but at least an irresponsible culture of gun use isn't one of them.
User avatar #721 to #714 - Spavaloo (08/27/2012) [-]
Your society is doing so well because the continent you live on actively wants to ****** you. Your citizens have things to worry about other than crime.
#745 to #721 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
well it wasn't an accusation of being a communist, but it was still amazing bigoted, well done sir, very creative.

*Ignores the fact China is our biggest economic partner*
I honestly live in fear of the asiatic hordes invading my country, oh wait I'm not heavily xenophobic and treat them with equality, because honestly they work harder than the small (and i mean small) racist minority which makes all noise.

User avatar #750 to #745 - Spavaloo (08/27/2012) [-]
I was there a few months ago, and I went to the Venom Zoo in Kuranda. I said with only the truth in mind that the continent you live on does not want you there.

The Asiatic hordes have already invaded, though. They outnumber visitors to Australia from any other part of the world by a factor of at least two and a half to one.
#760 to #750 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
I'm suprised you used the term "Asiatic horde" genuinely, i meant it as satire...
But it does reveal some interesting biases. Australia is an immigration nation, our culture/art/cuisine/philosophy was once monotone and racist. I was born in Malaysia, i lived there, but my family is about 3rd or 4th generation Australian. There is nothing threatning about people of Asian decent, many are my friends. Only paranoid white trash like you, who honestly deserve no place in this country, think less based on ethnicity. Multiculturism, and the reconginition of varying ideals and opinions creates a dynamic and liveable soceity. As a consequence of such, Melbourne is voted the liveable city in the world, and rightly so.
User avatar #773 to #760 - Spavaloo (08/27/2012) [-]
Look at the picture I use for my profile. Then, read x.kcd from start to finish (not sure if the comic name is still filtered out or not, just delete the full stop and search it).

I live by that picture- and the attitude it represents. I am not "paranoid white trash". I strive to embody satire while practicing neutrality. Any terms used by myself in a manner that seems racist or bigoted are used with full intent to mock the true bigots of the world. Taking me seriously in the comment section of this or any website is poor judgement and is only to be done by the foolish, a category which you find yourself in at the present.

The inability to recognize satire that you have displayed frankly disappoints me. The internet does not seem like a good place for you.
#787 to #773 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
Well, I'll admit you got me good. But Honestly, considering the other comments, there was enough stupidty to make me beleive you were genuine. Bad judgement on my part true, but really I'm not a bigot, i didn't react emotionally, and the satire was mediocre and aambiguous at best. So in conclussion you have wasted your time and mine, bad troll. Lift your game mate.
#709 - petal (08/27/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#707 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
lol gay

#702 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
the only reason why there is war in this world is because of governments, even if the governments were the only people to hav guns you could still get them. Look at drugs they are banned but people still can get them.
User avatar #712 to #702 - onewithpokerface (08/27/2012) [-]
no... the reason there is war in the world is because arms industry is the number one money making thing in the world. period.
#723 to #712 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
(not same anon) your comment screams of retardation, because past wars wernt fought for land, power, oil, money, women, men being ******** , the thought of forming a eutopia, for the king, and of course not the actual biggest contributer, religion.
#806 to #723 - anonymous (08/27/2012) [-]
what about Vietnam
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