the old lickaroo. . d, times you yourself Anonymous ( Thu) oi: mu I just did one of the most embarrassing, ball blooming things of my life. Seriously I cannot s
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the old lickaroo

d, times you yourself Anonymous ( Thu)
oi: mu I just did one of the most embarrassing, ball blooming things of my life. Seriously I cannot sleep because of the shame. This occurred nine hours ago.
ITT: TIM ES YOU is are emote bunny who I bumped into last week, I used to hang around with her brother ages ago, we were in a queue together.
COC K B Loc K E D is the get talking about fotress as I recall she was quite sporty, I mention my gym is rubbish and she says I should check hers out, guest pass and shiz
is I Jump at chance, both for gym and possible bone.
YOU RS E l. F is We go, I do chestiest' s she goes treadmill than than a few reps on the crunch machine for some reason.
is She asks what am I doing after this, I say might watch a movie, I' got a pirated copy of Avengers We been meaning to watch.,
is She says she has wanted to see that, I maintain my spaghetti and ask her to come, she accepts, met.
C) Anonymous s No.
is Go to mine, I crack open my cheapest wine, we are watching the movie and talking a bit.
is She is apparently a bit of a lightweight and wine goes straight to her head, we get talking about sex.
is Oh god just typing this hurts.
is She mentions her ex never went down on her. I say something along the lines of "what an idiot“.
is She goes in for kiss, we kiss for about 5 seconds.
is She pulls away, then I for reasons unknown need to fill a nonresistant void...
is “you know, I could give you the old lickaroo'
is the old lickaroo
is I said it and cheeky but there was no way that didn' t sound weird, **** I may have sort of winked a bit, oh god.
is She looks at no We I am a shoe miner and pulls away and said "err yeah just gonna go toilet’
is This commas roughly around when Hulk is smashing up the plane
is She returns and I put my hand on her knee In an attempt to salvage.
is We make awkward smal talk for what feels like an stem he man this is a long film
is when Hulk punches Thor I remove my hand from her.
is Eons pass and the film finally ends. I walk her to my door and go for A hug, she attentively pats me on the shoulder.
3- I am too ashamed to even masturbate, and just lie in bed alone.
a the old lickaroo.
Share with me your shame mth my misery needs company.
l I Anonymous 03/ 30/ 12( Thu) 07: 08 %
vgtt a girl back to my place
vgtt to talking about sex
attell I could giver her the old , and
winked at her
rehear her vagina shut down with the
windows 98 closing sound
...
+432
Views: 30464
Favorited: 79
Submitted: 12/02/2013
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#1 - implication (12/02/2013) [+] (3 replies)
stickied by internetshakespear
>be me at my room masturbating
>sister comes blasting in the room
>she sees me
>she is in shock
>try to play it out as wincest because sister is a solid 9/10
>"hey, you want the old lickaroo?"
>sister looks at me
>slowly closes the door
>I can hear her crying next room

Awkward as **** next day, sister keeps avoiding me now. For ***** sake I hate my life.
User avatar #2 - marcothespud (12/02/2013) [-]
stickied by internetshakespear
>be me
>last relationship ended recently
>ex comes round to pick up some of her stuff
>end up sat together just talking about how things were
>she jokingly complains about the lack of sexual release
>"you know, I could give you the old lickaroo?"
>she laughs
>she picks up her stuff, still laughing
>she leaves, still laughing
>old lickaroo
#8 - internetshakespear (12/03/2013) [+] (2 replies)
stickied by internetshakespear
>Be me, 16   
>gfs parents are out of town for the weekend   
>she invites me over   
>im still a virginfag, and beta as 						****					   
>sitting downstairs on the couch, she turns to me and says in a sexy voice, "so... what do you want to do"   
>ohgodshewantsthed.jpg   
>I could feel the spaghetti start to pour out   
>panic, yell "let's watch a movie!"   
>she looks a bit disappointed/confused and says, "um.. alright then.. what movie do you want to watch?"   
>"GALAXY QUEST!"   
>at this point, the spaghetti is so thick it's becoming gnocci   
>"um.... alright....."   
>watching the movie, I can feel Tim Allen's disappointed eyes staring at me through the screen   
>finally get the courage to put my arm around her   
>she puts her head on my shoulder   
>						****					 ya, so alpha   
>she starts talking to me   
>bitchimtryingtowatchamovie.exe   
>I pretend to listen, just saying stuff like, "uh huh, oh ya"   
>all of the sudden, she says "if I was chained to a bed, what would you do to me?"   
>"um... probably set you free"   
>"no! I mean sexually!"   
>						****					 it, time to man up - engage alpha mode   
>"I'd do so many unspeakable things to you"   
>her tone changes, she smiles a bit and starts approaching me   
>"Oh ya.. what would you do first" as she starts unbuttoning my shirt   
>start sweating a bit, say the first thing that comes to mind   
>"well, I'd probably give you the old lickaroo"   
>piles of gnocci everywhere   
>she backs away with a weird look on her face   
>I 						******					 up   
>gotta try to salvage the situation - never give up, never surrender   
>"I could do it right now if you want" I say in my deepest voice, trashing my tongue in and out of my mouth like a snake searching for food   
>"um... no thanks"   
>watch the rest of the movie in silence, go home right after   
>feel like an idiot, text her saying sorry   
>she texts me back saying she doesn't think it's gonna work out   
>By Grabthar's hammer, my manhood shall be avenged   
>text her back "I still want to chain you to a bed and 						****					 you"   
>she never responded   
>the old lickaroo
>Be me, 16
>gfs parents are out of town for the weekend
>she invites me over
>im still a virginfag, and beta as ****
>sitting downstairs on the couch, she turns to me and says in a sexy voice, "so... what do you want to do"
>ohgodshewantsthed.jpg
>I could feel the spaghetti start to pour out
>panic, yell "let's watch a movie!"
>she looks a bit disappointed/confused and says, "um.. alright then.. what movie do you want to watch?"
>"GALAXY QUEST!"
>at this point, the spaghetti is so thick it's becoming gnocci
>"um.... alright....."
>watching the movie, I can feel Tim Allen's disappointed eyes staring at me through the screen
>finally get the courage to put my arm around her
>she puts her head on my shoulder
> **** ya, so alpha
>she starts talking to me
>bitchimtryingtowatchamovie.exe
>I pretend to listen, just saying stuff like, "uh huh, oh ya"
>all of the sudden, she says "if I was chained to a bed, what would you do to me?"
>"um... probably set you free"
>"no! I mean sexually!"
> **** it, time to man up - engage alpha mode
>"I'd do so many unspeakable things to you"
>her tone changes, she smiles a bit and starts approaching me
>"Oh ya.. what would you do first" as she starts unbuttoning my shirt
>start sweating a bit, say the first thing that comes to mind
>"well, I'd probably give you the old lickaroo"
>piles of gnocci everywhere
>she backs away with a weird look on her face
>I ****** up
>gotta try to salvage the situation - never give up, never surrender
>"I could do it right now if you want" I say in my deepest voice, trashing my tongue in and out of my mouth like a snake searching for food
>"um... no thanks"
>watch the rest of the movie in silence, go home right after
>feel like an idiot, text her saying sorry
>she texts me back saying she doesn't think it's gonna work out
>By Grabthar's hammer, my manhood shall be avenged
>text her back "I still want to chain you to a bed and **** you"
>she never responded
>the old lickaroo
#6 - marlton (12/03/2013) [-]
Windows 98 startup and shutdown sounds (HD)
The Comment Section
#15 - ilroby (12/03/2013) [+] (1 reply)
>>hear her vagina shut down with the windows 98 closing sound


ahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahaha
#29 - dbBlues ONLINE (12/03/2013) [+] (1 reply)
>Summer after highschool
>old friend (8/10) just broke up with bf
>invites me over to her place
>no parents home
>hangout(go get food, walk around neighborhood, talk, etc)
>head back to her place, still only like, 2pm
>in her room, on her bed, watching BBT
>pretend to fall asleep so that she might take the initiative
>actually fall asleep
>smacks me awake
>finish watching the episode
>go home
>mfw 2 years later I finally realize what I did wrong

I cringed just writing this
#25 - drstedman (12/03/2013) [-]
>be me at party
>talk to this girl i am in love with
>get chatting away kinda flirty
>one thing leads to another
>unbuttoning my top
>Gordon Ramsey making Michelin stile spaghetti
>she starts talking dirty to me asking for it hard and deep
>spaghetti erupting out my penis
>me "you want the old lickaroo"
>she immediately stops and looks at me like i had just scarified her vagina to the devil
>she runs down stairs
>everyone finds out and im humiliated
>the old lickaroo
#31 - otroviciado ONLINE (12/03/2013) [+] (3 replies)
>be me   
>reading all this 						****					   
>ultimate mega ultra super badass betas everywhere   
>no interesting stories   
>i should study for my math test   
>search for a gif for this comment   
>ask to myself why no gf   
>don't give a 						****					 about it   
>fap
>be me
>reading all this ****
>ultimate mega ultra super badass betas everywhere
>no interesting stories
>i should study for my math test
>search for a gif for this comment
>ask to myself why no gf
>don't give a **** about it
>fap
User avatar #4 - fantasma (12/02/2013) [-]
This is beautiful.
Even if this is a repost, I would love for this to get on the front page.
#32 - dragondubobski (12/03/2013) [-]
happened like 10 minutes ago
>walking to my car
>girl I talked to a couple of times the obviously wants the D
>Wave, she opens mouth to say hi
>I do as well
>she can't get the word out for some reason
>throws off my expected order of events, now I cant say hi either
>Both of us waving and mouthing hi as we walk by each other in perfect silence

people saw
-1
#7 - keeganembry **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (1 reply)
#11 to #7 - incest (12/03/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#13 - awcskin (12/03/2013) [+] (1 reply)
get with girl
started as f buddies
got to the point where we were messing around
in the house
on my bed
parents and guest at house too
said she liked it rough
......i was a lil too rough
damn near ripped her tits off
broke up with me later that week
still talking though
said she got laid....the emotions
still hurts been a few months
no friends
its one of those weeks
User avatar #5 - chayio (12/03/2013) [+] (1 reply)
not mine reposting one i saw on /g/

>be home chilling with gf
>friend calls me and asks for help in fixing his computer
>go to friend's house, bring gf
>fix computer
>tell gf its time to go
>gf says she has headache, gonna stay at the house
>cry on the way home
User avatar #34 - warlordstuart (12/03/2013) [-]
> Be me. 23
> been with same woman since middle school.
> happily married, have kid. poor as **** though
> wife and i bored one day
> find old thread. have good laugh
> offer to give her the ol' lickaroo
> she says "sure" and removes her pants
> perform tongue lashing
> eventually leads to sex
> the old lickeroo

....


did i do it right?
User avatar #28 - thedungeonmaster (12/03/2013) [-]
This is one of the few posts that can be reposted everyday and I will still laugh just as hard at it.
#42 - solbadguygg (12/05/2013) [-]
lickaroo
#39 - selfrazedzealot ONLINE (12/03/2013) [-]
said i'm nervous during the nervous game
#37 - meatygoodness (12/03/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#24 - 4chan refugee (12/03/2013) [-]
Have this many people used the exact same phrase?
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