story time (enlarge if necessary). Just some funneh i found while browsing good ol' /b/. Anybody else here grow up with retardedly overprotective parents and fe
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story time (enlarge if necessary)

Just some funneh i found while browsing good ol' /b/

Anybody else here grow up with retardedly overprotective parents and feel like their social skills still suffer from it'? I don' t just mean
wouldn* t let me stay out late" protective. I' m talking "didn' t let me experience basic social interaction" levels of obsession. Somebody
please tell me they experienced something as bad as this story so I dont feel so alone about growing up so alone.
3 be 8 years old
no siblings
3 at that point had only been to school one day in my life. I was a nervous wreck, and sure other students would have picked on me
except they couldnt because my mom actually stayed there at the school with maths whale day
3 be early summer
3 always see kids playing outside from my window, because kids actually went outside back than
3 id seriously just sit there staring at kids playing outside, my mom never once thinking that this was strange
3 never be allowed to even explore the neighborhood
3 mom would occasionally walk with me down the street to this small type area, but if heaven forbid there were other people there i had to stay with her instead of
maybe actually making some friends
3 wake up early one morning, its raining outside
3 my life is so pathetically dull that I am amused by rain- fucking rain
3 mom lets me go outside and play in the rain, and by outside i mean the back yard
continued)
3- in a move as rebellious as my life had ever been up to that paint, i decide going to jump into the biggest puddle i can find and cover myself in mud
honestly just wanted to cover myself in as much filth as possible
3- mom notices and meant even get mad, opens the door, laughs, and tells me fine as long as istar outside - "I guess boys will be boys hurr
dun’
3- closes the trad goes back to reading a book or whatever
3- fuck this going to test my limits here, thug life
have yard
rs walk dawn the street to the park
rs in deep shit when my mom fittest out anyway, might as well try to mingle
is set in park
3- the rain has stopped, but nobodys there because its like in the meming and gross outside
3- covered in mud anyway
3- realize retarded, turn around to head home
3- here a young girl scream "'' and look warm see her waving at me from the back yard dds house closest to the park
shes a little me, maybe E or?
rs . jpg
rs dont say anything just awkwardly walk over to her
bashes
3- too entranced by social interaction to res lat the sweet song of this siren
3- "ALLWELL CLEAN'' - this girl apparently had a problem with volume control
continued)
El Anonymous (ID: / : 43: 54
314)
basks
3 oh sweet lord yes ido
3- this lasts for probably about five minutes, i dont even have the coordination to kick the damn thing properly but my god in
heaven
3- get this girl' s life story in those five minutes - her name is jennifer and she likes themes the tank engine
3- suddenly her dad opens the back door and shits a brick
3- starts screaming bloody murder like there to murder his daughter
3- jennifer is crying
3 i am scared shitless
3- just stand there rigid, too afraid to move or make a sound
3 crazypat walks over to me and fucking GEARS ME
3 drags me over to his can opens the passenger door, and tells me to get in
3- Host stand there because i have no idea whats going on or haw ishould be acting
3 "GET IN THE FUCKING CARP
continued}
414)
in the back seat, shes pleading with her father to me nicer to me, mia name is mama and has really nice and he likes tht: the tank eugine
bitch I never said i like mamas the tank engine
3- crazypat' s voice is calmer now but has still on like crazy, telling should have known better and he cant take his eyes off her fora second and some
other paranoid shit
drives me to my house, i Invent even told him where i live
see my mom standing at the front door with a couple of my neighbors, she managed to organize a goddamn search party in the 15 minutes i was gone
crazyred pulls into the driveway, parks at the very bottom, gets out
yells to my mom "i assume yours looking for newts?"
my mom sprints warts the passanger side with tears in her eyes, opens the car door, and throws her arms around me
close your gate next time. at least you had enough sense to put a tag on
3- rrzdiu I am a dag
...
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Views: 36256
Favorited: 190
Submitted: 08/26/2012
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Comments(170):

[ 170 comments ]

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#2 - lovetolmao (08/26/2012) [-]
That was well done. Mfw the ending.
#34 - DecubitusVulgaris (08/26/2012) [+] (1 reply)
>MFW I read he's a dog.
>MFW I read he's a dog.
#66 - ppeeddoobbeeaarr (08/26/2012) [-]
"Bitch, I never said I like Thomas the Tank Engine"
User avatar #18 - cmurphyjrjrjr (08/26/2012) [-]
at first i was like... this kid is pathetic
then i was like... i don't have a suitable reaction for this amazing work
+30
#25 - leveetothechevy **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (1 reply)
+27
#75 - zalaman **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (1 reply)
#73 - glowinthedarkpants (08/27/2012) [-]
10/10. I actually sat and thought about what I had just read.
#7 - dikslapping (08/26/2012) [+] (3 replies)
that was the best thing from /b/ i have ever seen
#62 - mainstreamusername (08/26/2012) [-]
God fucking dammit if there's one thing that gets to me more than Nessie, it's when they're animals. All the same. 10 out of 10 for Marcus.
#63 - chawlsBITCH (08/26/2012) [-]
Got me. I honestly threw my glasses on my computer desk and walked away because it was so flawless.

10/0
User avatar #42 - falloutfanatic ONLINE (08/26/2012) [-]
god dammit.... honestly never saw that coming
#4 - scaredfury (08/26/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#32 - SnacksJr (08/26/2012) [-]
I... I dont know what to say.   
   
10/10
I... I dont know what to say.

10/10
#147 - thatguythatlaughs (08/27/2012) [+] (1 reply)
that got me. 10/10
#149 to #147 - thatguythatlaughs (08/27/2012) [-]
cannot be unseen
#125 - souleatingbunnies (08/27/2012) [-]
Fuckin' Marcus. Being a dog and all that bullshit. Making me feel bad and then making me laugh my ass off.
Fuckin' Marcus. Being a dog and all that bullshit. Making me feel bad and then making me laugh my ass off.
#49 - mrpointynose (08/26/2012) [-]
10/10, a flawless victory.
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