oh /b/. . Fwd Memeries that yen will never farms. sbe at a party, about years would stalking be this girl, having a great time people leave, I' m fucking wasted oh /b/ Fwd Memeries that yen will never farms sbe at a party about years would stalking be this girl having great time people leave I' m fucking wasted
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Fwd
Memeries that yen will never farms.
sbe at a party, about years would
stalking be this girl, having a great time
people leave, I' m fucking wasted and sup is she
smy friends house, his dad was gene and he lets me "crash" in guest return
ssuck the shit out pf that drunk slut, she passes out after
sstill awake, want reind two shortly after, start pulling her pants dawn
stuart fingering her while she' s half asleep
I' ll never fucking farms that. I got up and went inta a different ream.
...
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Views: 50876 Submitted: 06/23/2013
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[ 168 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
#13 - thehappyphoenix
Reply +151 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
What if she said "Stop that" and either he misheard it or she mumbled because they were both drunk?
#33 to #13 - anon id: cb8e9f72
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Why not both!?
User avatar #14 to #13 - richardastley
Reply +13 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
I sure hope.
User avatar #6 - higginz
Reply +133 123456789123345869
(06/23/2013) [-]
I read that as
'Start fingering her dad while she's half asleep'
#7 to #6 - minsheme
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #8 to #6 - minsheme
Reply +20 123456789123345869
(06/23/2013) [-]
I read that as
"Farts tingling are bad.
Whale, she's half a sheep!"
#34 to #8 - damakorithus
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#174 to #8 - thisusernamesux
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
are you the fukin light bulb thingy ?
#26 - potatasivagree
Reply +107 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
>Be 15-16 year old girl
>Have sex with guy at party, was drunk
>Fall asleep
>Have bad dream where Dad is driving over the speed limit, I tell him to stop it
>Wake up, guy from last night is gone
#113 to #26 - anon id: 7bf968cf
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
You almost copied that post correctly.
#55 - latinotornado
Reply +76 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Story I will never forget   
>Be 10 year old me   
>My friends and I have been going through puberty (I had started one year earlier and they had started not long ago)   
>Since where 10 year old boys we're talking about banging girls even though we have no idea how to sex well   
>My friends start talking about their dick size (when you're 10 the concept of slightly homosexual topics is meaningless)   
>"alright Sebastian, how big is yours?" they ask me. I told them I dunno.  "Dude! You gotta know your dick size! When a girl wants to have sex they ask you that right away!"   
>lolk I go home that night and look for a ruler   
>before I get myself hard I google up 'average male penis size' so I had a reference on how I was doing.  average male size is 5.5-6 inches   
>go in the bathroom and think of big tits and asses and hot girls to get it up   
>check myself with the ruler and see i'm 6.5 inches   
>flip ****   
>extreme fear.  I was flipping out because I was only 10 and past the adult average   
>I was super scared, thought I had a tumor in my dick   
>wait for my dad to come home later that night   
>"dad, I think there's something wrong with my wiener"  my dad is an R.N. so I feel comfortable talking to him about it   
>He asks what's wrong and I tell him what happened and my 'size' issue   
>he sighs and puts his hand on my shoulder and says to me..   
>"Son..god has blessed you with a gift.  Now in time, you will mature, and learn how to use this gift properly and appropriately.  For now, don't worry about it.  It'll all make sense in a few years."   
>I kinda understood what he was talking about but I was just happy nothing was wrong.   
>I never forget that day because my father teases me whenever I come home from a girls house asking, "did you give them a gift?"   
    
hfw I was 16 and came home from my girlfriends house telling him "I got her a gift."
Story I will never forget
>Be 10 year old me
>My friends and I have been going through puberty (I had started one year earlier and they had started not long ago)
>Since where 10 year old boys we're talking about banging girls even though we have no idea how to sex well
>My friends start talking about their dick size (when you're 10 the concept of slightly homosexual topics is meaningless)
>"alright Sebastian, how big is yours?" they ask me. I told them I dunno. "Dude! You gotta know your dick size! When a girl wants to have sex they ask you that right away!"
>lolk I go home that night and look for a ruler
>before I get myself hard I google up 'average male penis size' so I had a reference on how I was doing. average male size is 5.5-6 inches
>go in the bathroom and think of big tits and asses and hot girls to get it up
>check myself with the ruler and see i'm 6.5 inches
>flip ****
>extreme fear. I was flipping out because I was only 10 and past the adult average
>I was super scared, thought I had a tumor in my dick
>wait for my dad to come home later that night
>"dad, I think there's something wrong with my wiener" my dad is an R.N. so I feel comfortable talking to him about it
>He asks what's wrong and I tell him what happened and my 'size' issue
>he sighs and puts his hand on my shoulder and says to me..
>"Son..god has blessed you with a gift. Now in time, you will mature, and learn how to use this gift properly and appropriately. For now, don't worry about it. It'll all make sense in a few years."
>I kinda understood what he was talking about but I was just happy nothing was wrong.
>I never forget that day because my father teases me whenever I come home from a girls house asking, "did you give them a gift?"

hfw I was 16 and came home from my girlfriends house telling him "I got her a gift."
User avatar #91 to #55 - roflsaucer
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Considering puberty starts at around 11~12 for boys, and not just you but all your friends as well started about a year early, I'm calling ********.
User avatar #163 to #91 - neutralgray
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
You're an idiot if that's the detail that makes you go "THIS IS ********."
User avatar #92 to #91 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
the AVERAGE is actually 10-12. I started one year early. It's not uncommon.
#93 to #92 - roflsaucer
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
K.
User avatar #94 to #93 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
User avatar #95 to #94 - roflsaucer
Reply -5 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
There are three sources on the Wikipedia page I screencapped from to support that puberty begins at ages 11~12.

Not to mention the fact that if your site is using the current average age puberty begins at, the information is most likely not applicable to you at age 10. Why? Because that's using 2011~2013 statistics for something that happened at least 6 years ago, depending on your current age. And recently puberty has been beginning earlier because of certain things put into foods and whatnot, i.e. preservatives. So you would be far less likely to begin puberty early 6 years ago than you would now.

So I am STILL calling ********.
#97 to #95 - latinotornado
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Yes, it's absolutely and totally impossible for me to have started puberty one year early. I mean there is noooo chance it could have happened. You are obviously correct due to your skilled usage of statistic averages. You're right dude, my whole story is fake because it's impossible for me to have started puberty early. You are sooooo smart to figuring out my little fib. Now what will I do that everyone's going to realize i'm a phony.
User avatar #99 to #97 - roflsaucer
Reply -4 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
It wasn't the fact that you started puberty early, it's the fact that your whole group of friends started puberty early.
User avatar #112 to #99 - latinotornado
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
I think you're missing the point of what an average is and it's really aggravating me. The average age that puberty begins at for ANY child is anywhere between 9-12. Once again, this is an average for both genders. Girls TEND to hit puberty BEFORE boys. So it's not uncommon for a girl to hit puberty at 8 or 9. Boys USUALLY develop later than girls. so the AVERAGE age boys begin puberty is 10-12. Once again, this is an AVERAGE. do you understand what an AVERAGE is? Because I don't think you do. A boy starting puberty at the age of 9-10 is NOT uncommon.
User avatar #114 to #112 - roflsaucer
Reply -5 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
No, I'm not missing the point of an average. Did you not listen to what I said?
I said that depending on WHEN the said average was gathered would, in this case, change the results because puberty starts earlier now that it use to, or rather the frequency of early puberty has increased. While that may increase, the age you are SUPPOSED to have puberty does not.

So if you take the average of 2011~2013 and apply it to something years earlier, this would make NO sense.

Let me restate my argument - boys are supposed to have puberty at the ages of 11~12 - notice, here, I'm not saying average - meaning, yes, you had puberty a year early. However, not only did YOU, but all your friends did too. Which, 6 years ago, is highly unlikely. Whatever recent average you get does not change this - because puberty occurring early is much more frequent now, which would thereby make the average age of puberty beginning now lower than it was 6 years ago.
User avatar #115 to #114 - latinotornado
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
that's it, i'm done. Feel victory, tell your mom to give you an extra cookie and some fresh undies for being a champ.
User avatar #118 to #115 - roflsaucer
Reply -5 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Look, all I'm saying is it makes your story doubtful.

I don't know if it's true, nor do I care. Just seems unlikely, is all.
User avatar #120 to #118 - latinotornado
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
>nor do I care
***** you just spent 45 ******* minutes arguing with me over my '********* story.
User avatar #122 to #120 - roflsaucer
Reply -5 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
It's 4 in the morning and I had nothing better to do.
#171 to #122 - chapperz
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
He is 10, his friends may be in the same year but 11 years old, there you go they are 11 and old enough to start puberty in your stupid idea, now shut up you're making yourself look stupid.
User avatar #124 to #122 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
once again, cookie and undies man. cookie and undies.
#128 to #124 - roflsaucer
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
But I don't want either of those.
User avatar #101 to #99 - comatzdark
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
I don't see the part where any of his friends mentioned having large penises.
User avatar #105 to #101 - roflsaucer
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
When did I mention anything about their penises?
Or his?
Or anybodies?

I said that, while if he alone were the one to have puberty early, his story would be totally believable. However, he and his entire group of friends did. So I'm doubtful.
#66 to #55 - mckinkymcormic
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
that's adorable!
that's adorable!
#67 to #66 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
May I ask how?
User avatar #68 to #67 - mckinkymcormic
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
daddy! i have a problem.
what is it?
i think i have a tumor.
its ok you just fine.
(father-son bonding hug)
story time.




IM A MAN DAMNIT!
User avatar #69 to #68 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
twas a terrifying experience to me
#71 to #69 - mckinkymcormic
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
better explaniation made by image.
#74 to #55 - owmowmow
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
No I swear I've heard this story before.
User avatar #75 to #74 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
If you have then the only way I can imagine is by word of mouth because i'v told a lot of friends that story. My dad usually tells it but I like to tell it now because I can understand the humor unlike when I was younger.
#76 to #75 - owmowmow
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Really? I'm scared now.
User avatar #78 to #76 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
why are you afraid?
User avatar #79 to #78 - owmowmow
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
I... don't know.....
User avatar #80 to #79 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Do you live in the states? and if so, what state? I'm curious now haha
User avatar #82 to #80 - owmowmow
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
No I live in Australia it's cold and wet atm lol
User avatar #83 to #82 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
ahhh then we definitely do not know eachother. I live in Alaska
#84 to #83 - owmowmow
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Really? that's cool I watched Balto a few days ago I thinking "man that place must be a harsh to live"
#87 to #84 - latinotornado
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Oh yes, my life is quite harsh in my house on my expensive laptop drinking Arnold Palmer and eating funyuns.  I may leave the safety of my bed to go play some PS3 now in my loft, it's a harsh life man.
Oh yes, my life is quite harsh in my house on my expensive laptop drinking Arnold Palmer and eating funyuns. I may leave the safety of my bed to go play some PS3 now in my loft, it's a harsh life man.
#89 to #87 - owmowmow
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Wow... so much in common.   
   
random GIf.
Wow... so much in common.

random GIf.
User avatar #90 to #89 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Yea haha Alaska isn't much different from the rest of the modern world. It's got major cities and towns, we have all the same crap technology wise. I mean, obviously if you go out into the bush it's pretty rough. The bush is where most of the stereotypes of alaska come from. Because most of Alaska still isn't modernized errr...whatever the correct word for it is haha
#159 to #90 - redstag
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Are you saying that movies lie about Alaska? Cause they wouldn't do that it's illegal!
Are you saying that movies lie about Alaska? Cause they wouldn't do that it's illegal!
User avatar #85 to #84 - owmowmow
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
also, pic related.
#150 to #55 - waterbottlemanboy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
I hit puberty late and was honestly small, but I got bigger though, thankfully. But the most sexual thing to happen to me was getting a bj from a guy at an art supply store. Still awesome though.
I hit puberty late and was honestly small, but I got bigger though, thankfully. But the most sexual thing to happen to me was getting a bj from a guy at an art supply store. Still awesome though.
#151 to #150 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
good for you man!
good for you man!
#152 to #151 - waterbottlemanboy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Thanks! And hey, at least he was hot.
Thanks! And hey, at least he was hot.
#153 to #152 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Haha whatever floats your boat bro!
User avatar #162 to #55 - neutralgray
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
"(when you're 10 the concept of slightly homosexual topics is meaningless) "

I can relate to this 110%.
User avatar #164 to #162 - latinotornado
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
tis true for many of us men. We all have those slightly gay conversations when we're that age because that slight homophobia hasn't been instilled into us yet hahaa
User avatar #165 to #164 - neutralgray
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Not just conversations, man. gay moments. Me and me stupid ******* friends back then thought it'd be hilarious to see if glow cream made an acceptable lotion so I filmed my friend jerking off in complete blackness to see if his dick would glow. And it did.

I look back on that and laugh my ass off because it's a fun story to tell but it's definitely not one I could repeat.
#166 to #165 - latinotornado
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
**** XD   
   
yea that's deff one not to tell in public haha
**** XD

yea that's deff one not to tell in public haha
User avatar #111 to #55 - garymotherfingoak
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
lucky bastard.
User avatar #116 to #111 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
which part?
User avatar #117 to #116 - garymotherfingoak
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
your gift
User avatar #119 to #117 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
well it sucked hardcore in 6th and 7th grade (sometimes in 8th) when I was getting random boners. My mom refused to buy me looser pants because she said they were baggy and ghetto and I was always uncomfortable talking to my mom about 'man/boy' stuff so I didn't explain that if I got a hard on that everybody and their momma would see it. Thankfully I never had one of those moments with a hard on and had to stand up in front of the class or antyhing.
User avatar #121 to #119 - garymotherfingoak
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
that's also a lucky moment. i don't have an exponentially large one like you do and i still have noticably large bulges frequently.
User avatar #123 to #121 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
It happens bro. It's great for sex though, size really does matter. I'm not saying that to discourage you or anything. It's just i'm pretty sure i'm not that great at sex because i'm still fairly young so I mean...not a whole lot I could know haha I just do some different positions and speeds and maybe some different hip movements now and then to spice it up, but I mean, **** haha not a whole lot I know in general, so i'm pretty sure if I didn't have my 'gift' then I would be pretty lame in the sack XD
User avatar #126 to #123 - garymotherfingoak
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
well size matters only in finding women though and having you feel more of what's going on.
User avatar #129 to #126 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
True. Plus I think my 'gift' was for a price. I'm a mediocre student haha
User avatar #131 to #129 - garymotherfingoak
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
*focused
User avatar #130 to #129 - garymotherfingoak
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
possibly. keep yourself focus m8.
User avatar #132 to #130 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Yup. Only one year of high school left too haha and thanks i'll try. Thanks for the conversation as well my friend
User avatar #133 to #132 - garymotherfingoak
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
np
User avatar #125 to #55 - zeroxnight
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
so 5.5-6 is the average male size. I am an average male in general, but above average considering the fact that I am Chinese. Kind of opposite with intelligence, I am above average when compared to most people but am average compared to other Asians
User avatar #134 to #55 - JMF
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
"how to sex well"
I had to take a break right there to laugh that off.
#135 to #55 - JMF
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
10 year old > Me.
10 year old > Me.
User avatar #136 to #135 - latinotornado
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
It happens man. But believe it or not you don't need a 'gift' to get women (or men)
User avatar #137 to #136 - JMF
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
>Implying I don't get girls








I don't.
#138 to #137 - latinotornado
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
yea sorry I didn't mean it like that :/ if you uh...need advice or something feel free to PM me or something I guess haha
#139 to #138 - JMF
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Damn, that is one adorable Pikachu.
Damn, that is one adorable Pikachu.
#11 - dehymenator
Reply +31 123456789123345869
(06/23/2013) [-]
#10 - lilbigjoker
Reply +16 123456789123345869
(06/23/2013) [-]
#27 to #10 - agentdoubleohio
-1 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #25 - demandsgayversion
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
If you read the lightbulb in a Scottish accent, it actually kinda makes sense
#42 - infinitereaper
Reply +10 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Fun for the whole family.
#141 - Dap
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
Ed your story is getting weird
#145 to #141 - mercyburris
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
User avatar #172 to #141 - deadmice
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/24/2013) [-]
I just wanna know where stuart came from...