huehuehue. . Fat people stories thread we me at Walgreens but it pays the bills while I wait to backto school in spring sshow night. not many customers y spudde
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huehuehue

Fat people stories thread
we me
at Walgreens
but it pays the bills while I wait to backto school in spring
sshow night. not many customers
y spuddenly see the fattest effet fat ***** approaching register
scan full m Mountain Dew and Het Pockets
I ' was so much fat that he haste lean en the cart to assist him with walking
we fat that he wen' t take anything out ofthe cart. makes me scan everything while its still in cart
ea guy walks in only wanting a Elle: Pepsi. haste wait behind Fatty McGee
Metal comes to 78 dollars
sweaty bill in my face like an asshole
dmark it to make sure its legit. tn put itin the register
wait let me give you the (whatever) cents"
astards searching in pockets fer approximately a decade looking fer change
em this point there are hour people waiting behind ******* Mcfatterson
rail visibly upset that they have ta wait for him
kl call fer second cashier
eeveryone immediately gees to his line to stop dealing with all the fat
tthis guy is seriously new running out of breath searching fer change
astards wheezing
Mcnally makes the change SC) I can give him all bills back
messed cashier' s line empties
any spends a couple minutes sorting hot pockets. wallet. fat
NI cant wait tn get heme and age tn bed, it' s been a long day"
smaking small talk I say. "Long day at work?"
oh no. I dent have aim. I renewed that money hem my mom"
what do yeti do?"
HI moderate the sports beard en khan"
wmm
...
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Views: 45114
Favorited: 133
Submitted: 12/23/2013
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Comments(76):

[ 76 comments ]

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User avatar #1 - lordplatypus (12/24/2013) [+] (4 replies)
Well, I'd like to say it escalated quickly but with all the fat in this story i'm not sure it could have...
#18 - bowmasta (12/24/2013) [+] (7 replies)
I work at a paintball field and I usually don't deal with ham planets but I did have a fatty the other day and this is his tale.

>Reffing a private party
>Usually get tipped from Parties
>Grandpa and 4 kids
>Grandpa is fit as an ox
>Kids are out of shape - Wheezing every game
>Thanks American P.E.
>Birthday boy is a little **** (like always)
>Never wants grandpa to play
>Grandpa is the best out of the 5
>BB after every game
>"I ran through and got you all"
>He sits in the back Every. Single.Game.
>Barking useless orders
>Yells loudly to cover him when he moves
>Gets shot to pieces
>Grandpa flanks and makes use of cover
>Never sticks his head out for more than .02 seconds.
>Runs like Forrest Gump
> ***** on all the kids in a 1 V 4
User avatar #20 to #18 - arsyro (12/24/2013) [-]
i played paintball with my dad once. It doesn't sound that bad until you realize that my dad was trained as a sniper in the US armed forces. My balls never fully recovered
User avatar #8 - ireallylikepotatoe ONLINE (12/24/2013) [+] (1 reply)
That's the only board I go on and I can completely believe this.
#15 - mayoroftownsville (12/24/2013) [+] (4 replies)
Coincidentally, this happened to me yesterday:
>Be working at supermarket
>Fat woman comes up to my register
>have a friend who is 300 pounds
>she dwarfs him with her ass alone
>ring out all her items
>"Do you have paper bags?"
>company is trying to phase out paper bags, only gives us ****** little lunch bags
>explain this to her, see the anger rising in her beady eyes
>"All you kids today think plastic is so great, well it's not! I blah blah blah..."
>yes ma'am
>of course ma'am
>show her the lunch bags, she rolls her eyes
>says to try putting groceries in plastic first and then the lunch bags
>she starts to help, puts a ******* of cans in one plastic bag
>clearly not going to fit
>start taking some out into another bag
>"DON'T YOU DARE TAKE OUT A SINGLE ******* CAN YOU **** "
>explain that not all of it will fit in one ****** lunch bag
>"YOU'RE JUST LAZY, GIVE THAT TO ME"
>she puts the whole thing into a ****** lunch bag, it immediately rips in half
>cans fall ******* everywhere
continued in part 2
#16 - mayoroftownsville (12/24/2013) [-]
Part 2
>start trying to move the cans again
>DON'T YOU ******* DARE. GO GET ME A BOX!
>wut
>explain that we don't just keep boxes lying around
>"THEN WHAT'S THAT?!"
>she points to a display box filled with ice scrapers
>that's a display box ma'am, I can't empty it
>at this point my supervisor has come over
>"Anon, why don't you go to the back and see if the manager has crushed all the boxes yet
>I go to the back, all he has is a banana box, really huge with a flimsy bottom
>take it back to hamplanet
>"THAT WON'T WORK, I NEED SOMETHING I CAN CARRY"
>cashier behind me is sick of all my customers switching to her line
>she dumps a box of plastic bags and hands it to me
>I start loading up the box and hand it to ham planet
>she keeps complaining as she's walking out the door, then falls and drops ******* everything
>mfw
User avatar #7 - WMDxVeLoCiTy (12/24/2013) [+] (3 replies)
im fat but people like this make me sick, its pathetic how they got like that.
#6 - cenderer (12/24/2013) [+] (3 replies)
No! NO! I don't want to be me!
#32 - mrpavelowgrimm ONLINE (12/24/2013) [+] (6 replies)
>Be me working cashier at ****** restaurant
>Friends know I work there come by sometimes I try to hook them up whenever I can.
> Group of friends show up
>I give them the ****** especial discounts you are not supposed to give unless they specifically ask for them.
>Friends disperse one by one getting their drinks
>Behind them Exo-planet RG 216435 comes into view marvel at my discovery expect NASA to send me letter of recognition
>Ask him his order I **** you not this ****** orders 3 items less than previous party
>Tell him his total and he looks at me with such indignant bewilderment
>Ask him what's the matter and he answers "How come I have to may more than those douche-bags?"
>I start to analyze situation I didn't give him secret discount cause he didn't ask for them.
>Tell him some special discounts have to be asked for if he has the coupons or saw the advertisement he can get them.
> ****** throws tantrum cusses and bitches about having to ask for them when I just gave them to my friends
>Manager over-hears asks me what's going on can't even begin to explain
>lardsack starts complaining hyper-ventilating trying to catch breath after every word.
>Manager gives me **** and makes me give hamlord some free **** .

>While all this was happening crazy friend I only know as "Yogi " stands in the middle of the restaurant sipping on his drink
>Give greasetub his **** he cant carry all of it by himself so co-worker has to help him.
>Glance over and see Yogi standing there sipping his drink he looks me dead in the eyes gives me chilltingling possesed man stare
>As soon as Lord Jabu Jabu passes by him he turns around Grabs both ends of Shamu's pants And pulls them down kicks him in them ass and makes him fall forward
>Grabbed all the wrapped **** Michelin Man dropped and yells in a perfect Yogi the bear impression
"HEY BOOBOO I JUST GOT ANOTHER PICK-NIT BASKET!!"
Runs out the store no one could contain laughter not even manager.
#30 - jalthelas (12/24/2013) [-]
>this guy is seriously now running out of breath searching for change   
>starts wheezing   
   
   
I cracked up so bad right there.
>this guy is seriously now running out of breath searching for change
>starts wheezing


I cracked up so bad right there.
#12 - riggyrigs (12/24/2013) [-]
>						*******					 mac fatterson
> ******* mac fatterson
User avatar #5 - sajouk (12/24/2013) [-]
Yeah, that sounds about right.
#51 - incest (12/24/2013) [-]
>be me   
>working at grocery store   
>we are under staffed that day, get asked to watch self scan and the front desk (where people get smokes and ask about stupid 						****					)   
>have all three available cashiers at till   
>one cashier, hamplanet   
>she can't work until she has a chair at her till   
>she tries to call my phone to complain that she has too many customers in her till   
>we usually call another cashier when there are more than 3 or so   
>she had 4   
>I can't answer cause dealing with customer   
>instead of waiting, she runs off crying thinking I am purposely causing her harm   
>wat.jpg   
>she runs off crying, leaving her till and customers there   
>tells my manager, and other staff who work there   
>mfw   
>talk to manager later   
>we laugh about it   
   
God I hate her so much.
>be me
>working at grocery store
>we are under staffed that day, get asked to watch self scan and the front desk (where people get smokes and ask about stupid **** )
>have all three available cashiers at till
>one cashier, hamplanet
>she can't work until she has a chair at her till
>she tries to call my phone to complain that she has too many customers in her till
>we usually call another cashier when there are more than 3 or so
>she had 4
>I can't answer cause dealing with customer
>instead of waiting, she runs off crying thinking I am purposely causing her harm
>wat.jpg
>she runs off crying, leaving her till and customers there
>tells my manager, and other staff who work there
>mfw
>talk to manager later
>we laugh about it

God I hate her so much.
User avatar #13 - Shrynesnotfunny ONLINE (12/24/2013) [-]
you had me at "cashier at walgreens" for I work there currently and I two have a fat regular customer that comes in and buys 6 of the 1.5 litres of Mountain dew every two days. It takes all of me not to eat a bullet everytime i go to work
#62 - shanagdamian (12/24/2013) [+] (2 replies)
my co-worker's mother-in-law makes $86 an hour on the computer. She has been without work for nine months but last month her payment was $14777 just working on the computer for a few hours. Look At This....... tec30.ℂom
User avatar #65 to #62 - oliveirajo (12/24/2013) [-]
my co-worker's mother-in-law makes $86 an hour on the computer. She has been without work for nine months but last month her payment was $14777 just working on the computer for a few hours. Look At This....... urapheiggit.ℂom
User avatar #35 - smokingman (12/24/2013) [+] (6 replies)
I don't want to justify him, but I'd like to point out that moderating a sport-related imageboard does not require being fit.
Hell, it doesn't even require knowing anything about sports and fitness.

Sport doesn't mean fitness, it means competition, be it basketball or eating contests.
#37 to #35 - semidemon ONLINE (12/24/2013) [-]
yes, but irony.
#60 - wontforget (12/24/2013) [-]
I want to see the rest of the stories in that thread
User avatar #50 - oceanfrank (12/24/2013) [+] (2 replies)
Man you guys must get some of the worst fat people. Literally the fat people that I go to help at my job are the kindest ************* you'll ever meet. Literally I think half of them are santa and mrs. claus. What's even funnier I swear the fat people decide faster and move faster than everyone else prolly cuz they want to eat sooner.
#29 - HEADSHOTyou (12/24/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Comment Picture
User avatar #23 - bjartur (12/24/2013) [+] (3 replies)
This february my sister went to USA and she saw the fattest of ***** sitting at the table, so right after my sister ordered a meal at the counter, this fat **** suddenly gets a heart attack and dies.

the only thing my sister thought of was " damnit, where can I sit now ? " because the room was full of surprised americlaps.
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