Something something joke about 4chan. How great would it be if all these stories happened to the same person?. Nretam Real lfe moments you are ashamed of we e w
Home Original Content Funny Pictures Funny GIFs YouTube Funny Text Funny Movies Channels Search

Something something joke about 4chan

How great would it be if all these stories happened to the same person?

Nretam
Real lfe moments you are ashamed of
we e
wee seme ofmy menu hang out
mend bung: ens sister
neem lets es dunk w/ we coolers
new awesome " **** about
drunk forthe new hme
to put en seme mum:
w seen my mem forthe past hour
we to get another- cooler
pantry ees no door
mend my mem
mew eneste
we back to the we neem
neak to ens sister
masster w: drunk " ****
een we the bed neem
mehe' s euwe to ****
nakes ebeen clothes
wee knew howto take ebeen ene
wee knew howto was
ene unjust whynne there
ween someting from the bathroom heath es
monent broke sank ******* my mem en l
impend the weege tskune sister (she we me
That ees to be ene ofthe weirdest moments Emmy lfe sew crony, ween w thank about l
Hae we
my ebeen beeson and ens mend
wns frends a eww neem but okay
m" Hey can you watch Anon for a "
weaves
news guy talked me Into whynne euwe en the bed
newbs me to suck ens enak
w ten, w not even aware ehwhat my ewe perms does
neww enm w aee knew
we demonstrates en me
new w gettng my enak sucked by a grown man
ween leesons een pull up
we up pants
we a taco
And that wes my new sexual
Holy **** new
We we
rightly league ofreminds
manerds en skype go to bed
for a weege throw seme mastodon en
weege togera l
******* bangbros
annee Into l
ripply sht tons ofline
ween loud ess nolte outside
llook outside to we l
nenene weege curtain wes all the way open
there we mam l
muscle w: es feet away we ens truck
gradually walk away from curtain
we not even full boner
we to (b/ to get my mmd outings
nee ths thread
D Anonymous (IO / 13( ) 04 44 15 mos No Rams:
We 17
we bored horny " **** en the Internet
thenwe searching for eene craiglist caused encounters
Aman orenge people use to let enm
we horny that w reply to ens ad
ttell enm W 17
mms men was up to we
manye to ens house and get my enak sucked
new eene were
New duty " **** , spent the weege hme my eww: eene l
mst/ l regret l alot
Not really that bad
Here' s anotherfjer op
w posted ths somewhere else but should aee eene
neine eneeq
run the playground
Soulles push me euwe
crush out ofthe corner chm eye
neww myselfe gotta man up
nee got eene eveyone on en the psa
weege aee em
neww the heme: w can shoot
to get the worst ess chm lfe
D Anonymous no ) / 13( ) 03 53 an mos No 470385178 Rams: » »enilennaa
eene
wee a nineteen
wes may " sht
wee the misake wth enm
nee next day, m eveyone seme " eema we my neem
n hear Hey Anon week wee w can could"
neen around and see enm full en maself
we a beta anymone
neww enm to get the **** out before w beat ens ess
eema een evenn
ween later have he ****** ens Jennee ene to death
I nonymous I Rams: _
We 15
about guys at the hme
we pool eveyone eames wth mend
eneeq up euwe and he pulled my pants euwe randomly and sucked my enak for a few serenes
w ene seme
felt really good
kept eene l to minutes
annee get een w
about to get out ohcool and week up at house waneer
dad weekend at me wth most digusted face
never spoke word oft
cannot stop at momeny
be 20 new and Deanne he forgot
D Anonymous (IO G / 13( ) 05 28 47 ewes No Rams: »
He enm forget we aee forget that sht
D Anonymous (IO weege ) / 13( ) 04 Us we mos No 470386529 Rams: »
Be yesterday
aabout to move to a new place
eames menu euwe me clean out the new place
Megs we my reedeem
Wm cleaing the sank we the bathroom
ggu week wee sees eene
een about to open my serener chest wth all my bandage gear and d/ dos and other kinky sht
we wens l
Wm w
we wee
we closes l quckly
appologies
we aee bung w up
ween the place
we weaves
ttell my asabout w later
we laugh but w knew
w never be able to use that , w cant even week at w
I Anonymous an n )/ 13( ) 05 aw we ewe's No 470396546 Rams:
We eema key 1280x960, )
We we
we my evenn " usual
cat walks up, parks next to me
my no attenion ths sht w: gettng good
through
nnewmy bust that nut
rreally cat never moved
maxed all een " back
wee no neeh howto clean l Must let w dry
few weege: later w weaker Into the kitchen and m mem wes sunken the cat
We 1365159853011 pg-( , )
we eneeq
weege seme move, all song en the Mor
rlrl Deanne me ees a crush en me
we keeps Jeanne me and sht
nnewmy ween w week back sees attemping to Msh at me
New " sht so w aee see sht but knew wee see wes attemping to do
wen en tell mend that w sew a weege
we asks me wee l weegee inke w told enm "llke a hue“ ( ******* cause w had no neeh)
we asks seme eww to show enm
we weeks at me " , must shrug
New nee eneeq see shows enm we the bathroom, he actually sew
we eames Deeanne back Ween exceed and says you weenu Ham! " inke a evenn
Myrna sense's that wave seen that ewes Wee
spuddenly l becomes cool for eww: to Msh them sht at boys we our class
news was en for about a month before out
we yells " es but doesnt tell anyone because offeer wee
Mum w started a we eneeq weege club without eye a weege
Anonymous an e / 13( ) 06 42 28 I Anonymous on 'mag'') / 13( ) 06 34 AB ewe's No 470403358 Rams:
we young
w my neem Wynne neeh eames Meme my Erwin head through my mom' s Wee
ween meening sounds from my sisters neem Ashore my shoulders, my elbows, my weege ******* body out een most euwe
n thought engeneers were exhort Week en hem! afterwards
new to een neem
Appen the door Not my proudest moment
new en the Mor
eeveryone was ******* hearth a broom D Anonymous (IO ) / 13( ) 06 an we mos No 470
We 1365161418958 key 320x240, batman holdong a mews
new wok down my door _
n have dragon dildos hanging frufru the Deanne we me
m use wens day eames we homework, rework forthe
new fght through we dongs news go en Ashen‘
Tthere ene rmah, nutmeg en en
new my bedroom door >/ w 5 bunny today
we wearing e bennek en new
nee ths thread
myself we owe oil ppost we l
rra ml en my balls
Pla/ Mm my nipples
as weege as possible "YOUR MOVE MR LADIMAN!" Ne never been more digusted at myself
cops MN never be the seme
12' ( 13 we 36726%
mew. u
Teachers ween ask nee whal helped the turtles aee nat Lewis w WU Ono knew
...
+1429
Views: 61870
Favorited: 292
Submitted: 06/17/2014
Share On Facebook
Add to favorites Subscribe to sunsetshimmer Subscribe to 4chan E-mail to friend submit to reddit
Share image on facebook Share on StumbleUpon Share on Tumblr Share on Pinterest Share on Google Plus E-mail to friend

Comments(261):

[ 261 comments ]

Show All Replies Show Shortcuts
Show:   Top Rated Controversial Best Lowest Rated Newest Per page:
Order:
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #120 - sunsetshimmer (06/18/2014) [-]
stickied by sunsetshimmer
#2 - blipz (06/17/2014) [+] (11 replies)
These stories give me the right mix of "haha" and "jesus ******* christ what the **** "
#3 - bentimover (06/17/2014) [+] (5 replies)
>Be me, 18
>Riding my bike back home after a night of drinking
>Some Indian guy asks for directions
>End up having a half an hour conversation with him about life
>It's getting late so I want to go home
>Indian guy says "I'm very excited of you" His exact words
>Have a feeling this isn't ending well
>I say "I'm not gay"
>"Come on, I just want to suck you"
>He grabs my crotch as I politely say "No thanks" He didn't say no homo
>Go home and take the longest shower ever before finally going to bed. Terrified.
>MFW
#14 - xnotcreative (06/17/2014) [+] (1 reply)
>Be today
>At college, leaving the parking lot
>As I'm walking I see a Miley Cyrus "BANGERZ TOUR" bumper sticker on the back of some Hyundai
>live at home sister in law's obsessed with this **** , therefore, **** this ****
>without thinking, start picking, scratching and peeling at it
>seconds turn into minutes and I'm still picking at it
> bumper is now completely defaced
>check the time
>"Oh **** , class starts in 2 minutes"
>look at myself in the reflection of Hyundai's tinted rear window
>done fixing my hair, look inside car out of curiosity
>spot a pair of eyes looking at me in the rear view mirror

The driver of the Hyundai was looking at me the entire time.
#9 - maaarknuuuut (06/17/2014) [+] (3 replies)
#8 - kingofunnyjunk (06/17/2014) [+] (4 replies)
#6 - benschien ONLINE (06/17/2014) [+] (1 reply)
User avatar #10 - iceguy ONLINE (06/17/2014) [+] (2 replies)
what kind of turtles
User avatar #19 to #10 - olmesy (06/17/2014) [-]
Sea turtles. You know, the kind that are 5 feet long and weigh 200kg?

Hundreds of them.
#30 - thesirofponies (06/17/2014) [+] (6 replies)
I've got a story for you guys.
>Be me,8
>Visiting grandparents on Cape Cod
>Stuck in traffic for hours,last thing we ate was greasy Chinese food
>In Hyannis
>"Mommy,I need to go to the bathroom"
>We pull up to a Marylou's coffee
>Take a **** in the toilet
>3 foot log of horror,half hour passes
>Go to look at it before I wipe up
>loose balance,fall over
>Hear the bloodcurdling sound of an earthquake
>Round 2
>A minigun of dark green diarrhea ejects out of my asshole onto the wall
>Turn around and stare in horror
>The minigun fires up again
> **** everywhere
>The horror subsides
>Wipe up like a pro, and run out
>As I look back,janitor has a Vietnam flashbaack looking at the formerly pink bathroom
And that's how I'm banned from the Marylou's Coffee in Hyannis Massachusetts.
>mfw
#40 - grimmwaters ONLINE (06/17/2014) [+] (11 replies)
>Be 16
>Be 3:00AM
>Be experimenting
>Decide I like women's clothes, as they're more comfortable
>Have milfy step-sister
>Steal one of her thongs out of the wash
>Hide it amongst my clothes and go take a shower
>Midway through the shower I hear the door open
>Mom comes in to pee
>For some odd reason she decides to look through my clothes
>Finds frilly black thong
>Tell her its not mine
>MFW she knows i'm full of **** and Dad's gonna hear about this
#43 to #40 - grimmwaters ONLINE (06/18/2014) [-]
One more because why not
>Be 18
>Just finished having a shower
>Wee hours of the morning maybe 4:30
>Feeling ballsy I walk back to my room naked
>No regrets
>Decide I want to jerk it
>Start goin' ham
>Butt ass naked
>Feet outstretched on my bed
>Next thing I know Mom walks in
>Foiledagain.bat
>Asks GrimmWaters, what are you doing?
>In my feeble attempt to cover up, I say "I'm Stretching.."
>She looks me in my eyes, and closes the door while saying "Ok, don't pull anything.."
I didn't leave my room for 3 days after that.
#39 - finalfantasymaster (06/17/2014) [+] (4 replies)
heres another 4chan story
#41 - dogwars (06/18/2014) [+] (11 replies)
>Be me, 14
>At girlfriend's house
>She's ******* crazy
>Some of the **** she's done is ******* insane, I've thought about story-timing her before
>8/10 redhead
>I go along with it because horny teenager
>Staying the night because parents don't give a ****
>2am
>She wants me to eat her out
> ************* .jpeg
>I have no idea what I'm doing
>Start to kiss her vaj
>What's this weird thing at the top
>Bite it lightly
>She flips the **** out and punches me in the top of the head
>Figure I ****** up
>Get up
>Finger her
>Go back to watching anime with her in my lap
>She jerks me off later
Everythingwentbetterthanexpected.jpeg
#52 to #41 - kwanzalord (06/18/2014) [-]
why did you start with "be me'   
Like....who the 						****					 else could you be?
why did you start with "be me'
Like....who the **** else could you be?
#97 - darthmaulman (06/18/2014) [+] (3 replies)
Only a few months ago
Dont judge me
Im a massive beta

Been hanging out with this really cute girl I met a few months before
We quickly became best friends
I look back now and realize she wanted my D but I was too stupid to see at the time
I give her ride to school every day (College)
We live about an hour away
Joke one day that I need to be there extra early and need to leave at about 6:15 am
We normally leave about 8ish
She says "Well if were leaving that early, I might as well just stay at your house tonight."
My ******* brain shuts down
I say "Sorry but I don't think that will work"
I wish I was making this up
But this is 100 percent true
MFW
#77 - Jabberwocky (06/18/2014) [-]
> ****** his guinea pig to death
#15 - elseano (06/17/2014) [-]
"Grown woman strokes sticky pussy"
#51 - marinepenguin (06/18/2014) [-]
>Be 17, in football senior year
>Everyone on the football team acts gay as ****
>Everyone grabs each others asses really hard just to surprise each other and freak them out
>End of practice one day
>See opportunity to freak this kid out while we're doing our closing talks about practice, next game, etc
>I grab his ass with a force and strength I didn't know I possessed
>He grabs on to my hand, holds it on his ass, and lets out this siren shriek that silences all 80 of the football players
>My hand is still glued to his ass
>Coach looks at me with this dumbfounded look on his face
>"......Did you just grab another man's ass?"
>Remain silent
>Coach looks down and mumbles "Jesus Christ.." before moving on
>Coaches face when he literally caught me playing grabass with another guy
User avatar #125 - elcreepo (06/18/2014) [+] (2 replies)
>be 16
>first job on Cape Cod, living with my father
>be going great, making sandwiches and working the till
>boss comes and tells me to clean the men's bathroom
>k whatever I'm getting money
>Go in
>It's ******* Nam in there there is **** everywhere, even on the ceiling
>It's ******* green and brown and dripping
>Did a swamp monster rape an infant in here?
>the smell is enough to make me faint, run to sink to get water on my face before I add my lunch to the mix
>Inside the sink is the biggest turd I've ever seen
>run out, manager gives me the "you leave now you're so ******* fired" look
>go back in after pretending I needed extra cleaning supplies
>ain't enough bleach in the world not even in Amanda Todd's stomach
>start cleaning because hey, it's money and I'm sixteen
>Anyone else with more experience would have quit there and then or called a swat team
>Nobody deserves to touch the slimy butt babies I touched that day
>Go home, take the longest shower of my life
>don't eat anything for the next two days
>Lifelong fear of **** and the color green ingrained in me
#5 - anonymous (06/17/2014) [+] (2 replies)
>be me being 17, early morning
> computer had no sound
> ******* dial-up
> had to look up pictures to jerk it to
> find one of raven riley, bent over in a closet (still clothes)
> dowhatyagottado.jpg
> sit back on the couch in the room, spankin it
>mother shuffles down the hallway. only heard her close enough to put dong away
> "What's this"
> mfw "nothing. It just popped up"
User avatar #102 - shogg (06/18/2014) [+] (14 replies)
>Be me, first or second grade I honestly can't remember
>The sandbox was out turf
>School has this ditch at the corner of the yard, right next to the sandbox
>No one on the yard can see you if you stand in the ditch
>Me and my friend convince this girl to go down there with us
>She was kind of cute to me at the time
>Tell her to show us her vagina
>She does
>Me and my friend think we are hot ****
>Abuse this poor girl until I moved in the third grade
>Pull her pants down, make fun of her, etc
>Halfway through the third grade I move to a different town and a different school
>Get a huge ******* package at school one day
>Open it at home and find its full of letters
>My old teacher had the class write to me
>Get letter from girl I abused
>She says in the letter how much of a dick I was and that she hopes people aren't dicks to me at my new school
>Literally one of the nicest people I've met and I was nothing but a total cunt to her
>Feel guilty as ****

So Callie, if you ever read this by some crazy chance, I am so, so sorry for everything I did in elementary school. You were really cool and didn't deserve it.
#75 - mormon (06/18/2014) [+] (5 replies)
In case someone hasn't seen this gem of a thread
[ 261 comments ]
Leave a comment
 Friends (0)