Dating story. . This happened a long time age- Take really attractive girl out fer a data at this as Italian restaurant Hist for a while, small (alk get bill GO
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Dating story

This happened a long time age-
Take really attractive girl out fer a data at this as **** Italian restaurant
Hist for a while, small (alk
get bill
GOD
is her
glares aims
swat did we say?"
r-" Ere yes think i cant pay fer my awn **** ?"
s'' No, l was rust being?
ewes were being the stereotypical ******* that thinks weman cant support "
troche gets up
Plates and bottle shrine smash against finer
starts throwing **** elf of shares and ether peepee' s tables
few people get em up frem l: glass that same hem shattered settles smiles, plates, vases, at eaters
at think a few slipped silver the wine tee
eventually makes her warts the deer
o" PAY FOR THAN"
calarts deer really ******* hard en the way out
around
Manager wreathing dawn my making
o'' Will yes be paying fer thi.?"
at smile
at hand him enaugh mesa is pay fer my portion eitha meal
at else write sewn her contact and billing , elem with her license plate
She went to jail a months earlier l: . isa afford to pay fer all of the damages. We net mimicking.
it wreaths best moment in my life.,
ml tairan‘ t dated amines ainoa.
...
+3479
Views: 74560
Favorited: 385
Submitted: 03/24/2012
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Comments(366):

[ 366 comments ]
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User avatar #392 - shoryuken (08/03/2012) [-]
kingnappa

**** you
#409 - senseofpurpose (03/25/2012) [-]
>TL;DR   
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pic related
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#408 - klaidcraft (03/25/2012) [-]
**klaidcraft rolls 38**
User avatar #404 - DisgruntledTomato (03/25/2012) [-]
go to a restaurant for first date with a girl
>pick the table close to the toilets so I won't have to walk to far when I go for my postprandial ****
>the waiter asks what we would like to drink
>she orders red wine I order banana
>the waiter tells me they don't serve milkshake so I demand for a bowl of icecream
>date asks about strange order
>I say I am going to mush up the icecream and consume it, she is impressed but doesn't show it
>the waiter exhales heavily and slithers away
>awkward silence so I come in with the pick up line "what is your favourite dinosaur?"
>she says she doesn't know, I announce mine is a pterodactyl
>a few minutes later after recalling the plot of Jurassic Park 3, wine arrives for her






User avatar #405 to #404 - DisgruntledTomato (03/25/2012) [-]
I ask where my icecream is
>waiter says he will bring it after our meal
>I tut loudly but don't complain
>She says she is ready to order the lobster bisque
>he turns to me
>"no its dandy, I brought my own feastings" I inform him placing my container of spaghetti on the table
>he mutters something in french and hurries off
>after a few minutes of silence she talks, but I am not listening
>I laugh and exclaim "you know that is so true"
>"what you think it is funny my dad has cancer"
>I choke on my spaghetti spraying it on the table
>Instinctively I lurch over and pick chunks out of her wine
> she looks close to vomiting and runs into the bathroom
>I pursue after her and tell her that is some leavings on her skirt, however she ignores my cries
>she slams cubicle door in my face I can hear the meaty sound of chunder
User avatar #407 to #405 - DisgruntledTomato (03/25/2012) [-]
>an old women screeches "pervert pervert"
>"no my girlfriend is ill I am trying to assist!"
>behind the door she yells "I am not your girlfriend"
>the old lady takes a wild swing with her handbag, and catches me in the eye
>out of blind fury I yell "shuryuken" and lunge at her with an uppercut
>missing spectacularly I plummet to the floor
>the waiters burst in and drag me to the kitchen where they tell me that after I pay I must leave
>I suddenly remember I spent all my money on my new fedora
>I try to make a dahs for it but I trip on my cape and go flying into the lobster tank
>the lobsters claw and attack me, I grab a shard of glass and slash them all to death
>everyone is horrified by the massacre I have just commited and they shy away from me as I collect my spaghetti and leave
>stop in the doorway and admire the havoc I just wreaked
>everyone cowers in fear

haven't dated since
#399 - anonymous (03/25/2012) [-]
Fake. Seriously, you're dumb.

**** you ****** .
#403 to #399 - aksion (03/25/2012) [-]
No one gives a 						****					, that 						****					 was epic.
No one gives a **** , that **** was epic.
0
#389 - lebanonymous has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #390 to #389 - lebanonymous (03/25/2012) [-]
25 year old , Parents tell me to get a girlfriend and get married , went on vacation , met lot of crazy people , came back with nothing , still feels like i dont need a partner .
why i came back empty? :
- bitches so demanding , they think i have a money-tree growing in my yard
- acting so high and mighty , just because they have a vagaga
- you have to own a house ( 250,000$ min because i live in downtown) or 100,000 in the country which i dont have
- not a working female , she just want to go out shopping while i work my ass out
- they are not open to the internet/ anime / online video games (my hometown has no good internet )
- life style still old fashion where people do visits and **** to enjoy their time
- fun is considered crazy ( before marriage ) , after marriage it's a guaranteed divorce ( try to light fireworks indoor)

no that's not female dominance , that's a ******** society Vs 1 guy
#402 to #390 - spiritedaway (03/25/2012) [-]
"while i work my ass out "
You mean "off".
#387 - kisushima (03/25/2012) [-]
This sounds about right..
User avatar #386 - woahnelly (03/25/2012) [-]
Women..
#385 - suzukihondacivic (03/25/2012) [-]
**suzukihondacivic rolled a random image posted in comment #60 at Walking Dead fetish ** mfw
#383 - cthulhutotet (03/25/2012) [-]
Comment Picture

#382 - herecomesjohnny ONLINE (03/25/2012) [-]
#381 - marconde (03/25/2012) [-]
Comment Picture

User avatar #379 - IamSofaKingdom (03/25/2012) [-]
See made up story post on FJ then see dozens more in comments.
#377 - Is that a nipple (03/25/2012) [-]
Alternate beginning: "Would you like to pay?"   
"You're the man you have to pay you inconsiderate pig!"   
Same ending
Alternate beginning: "Would you like to pay?"
"You're the man you have to pay you inconsiderate pig!"
Same ending
#384 to #377 - bananabaker (03/25/2012) [-]
LOL THAT GIF
#375 - Thepotatofromhell (03/25/2012) [-]
>never been on a real date
>had sex with +20 girls
>has ridiculous dating standards
>dated 5 girls
>Every one of them have ****** me over in a way (cheated, lied, dumped me for no real reason, etc)
Feeling pretty beta right now. :l

A lot of people think its some huge achievement to have a lot of promiscuous sex with a bunch of girls that mean nothing to you. Speaking from experience, its not. It makes you feel like **** , like you're a dirty piece of untrustworthy **** .
Anyway, /rant-ish.
#400 to #375 - anonymous (03/25/2012) [-]
I had to dump my girlfriend. She was 5, I was 21 at the time, now I'm 30. I beat her too much.
#380 to #375 - anonymous (03/25/2012) [-]
thank you! i completely agree
User avatar #373 - tehweave (03/25/2012) [-]
It's times like this that make me happy I'm single.
#372 - nuclearromance (03/25/2012) [-]
>First date
>Restaurant and I hate eating out
>Her chick friends show up randomly and sit next to her
>Cool with this
>Her dude friends show up sitting in the group
>Pushed to the outside
>Talks the whole movie with chick friends
>Everytime I try and join in I get the look
>She talks flirting and does stuff under the table with the dude across from her
> **** it. I don't know anyone here, I'm leaving.
>No one says anything as I get up and leave
>Late that night I get a text, "Hey great hanging out with you. I had a blast being together"

NO **** YOU.
#371 - kaisergodzilla (03/25/2012) [-]
I haven't dated/had a girlfriend in a little over this year because of this kind of **** , no kidding almost every date I have been on this kind of crap gets pulled on me, had to run out the back door of an Olive Garden because the exact same thing happened to me as the poor bastard in the posted story.
#395 to #371 - lostinthemusic (03/25/2012) [-]
For her.
For her.
#368 - wewilldinealone (03/25/2012) [-]
>First date with a girl   
LOL Just kidding I've been single all my life   
   
Picture unrelated
>First date with a girl
LOL Just kidding I've been single all my life

Picture unrelated
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