i know i cant,but i still think that if i was there i could have done something
i should stop now,im making myself depressed

for tonight and the rest of tomorrow

thank you

14th
will you be my valentine?

i dont think i have
and if i did what did you say?

oh,its ok
ill get one some day
sorry for wasting your time

really?
thats nice of you to say
its fun talking to you too




can i tell you a secret

i have never gotten a valentines day card
and iv never had someone be my valentine

i hate you
and feel happy for you at the same time
its rage inducing happiness

i really doubt it
but,i feel happy for you
im going to sound like a dick right now
seeing people happy makes me feel depressed
because i cant feel that happy

because people tend to avoid me,alot
and i mean all people,they keep away from me like im some sort of plague
never got invited to parties or had any close friends
just me

i did have one friend tho
he was nice,and i could always talk to him
but a few years ago he...
well lets just say he isn't with us anymore

we were best friends
i moved away but every summer i would go see him
i did this for years
but one summer i didnt go,i was upset
then,a few weeks later
i hear the news,he and a friend were messing around
he decided to go in his dads dresser and pull out his gun,his friend was in another room and heard a bang
he shot himself in the head
it wasnt suicide,he wasnt like that


i sometimes think that if i was there i could have stopped it from happening

14th
today is 11th in EST
3 days