anal lube sandwich. . My vagina smells because I swear to god you Coat your dick in mayo wary time WE MAYBE IF “r’ OUD STOP KEEPING THE LUBE IN THE FRIDGE AND A
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anal lube sandwich

My vagina smells because I
swear to god you Coat your
dick in mayo wary time WE
****
MAYBE IF “r’ OUD STOP
KEEPING THE LUBE IN THE
FRIDGE AND ACTUALLY ‘WET
THAT GRAN DPES EAR OF A
CUNT BEFORE WE **** I
WOULDNT HAVE HAD THAT
HAM, ANAL LUBE AND
CHEESE SANDWICH
...
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Comments(83):

[ 83 comments ]

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#2 - kaboomz (12/27/2013) [+] (2 replies)
This image has expired
#13 - Ninjaxon (12/28/2013) [-]
Vajayonnaise
Vajayonnaise
#26 - anonymous (12/28/2013) [+] (27 replies)
You guys don't know the meaning of vaginal terror.
There was this girl in my class last year who was notorious for getting off by putting foreign objects in her cunt and ass.
Now, everyone knew this kid had ****** up kinks. But it was that fateful morning in math class that changed everyone's perception of 'kink' forever. And I got a front seat view of the entire event. You see, I sat right across from her. It began like any other class; turn in homework, write down notes, etc. But then the people in our group began to notice a smell.
Vinegar.
Yes, that's right. Vinegar. Then I look up and see her shifting around in her seat, obviously distressed. For the next half hour she squirmed. I put two and two together. She had a pickle. In her ******* vag. In class.
The teacher calls on her. She stands up. And she ******* SCREAMS. **** hits the fan. She falls to the ground and starts violently convulsing and jerking around.

Medic comes in, had to pull the pickle out in front of everyone.

User avatar #56 to #26 - edbanger (12/28/2013) [-]
Sounds like she was in a bit of a pickle.
#3 - katha (12/27/2013) [-]
eurgh.
eurgh.
#15 - kaycie (12/28/2013) [+] (6 replies)
idk if this is an urban legend everywhere
but everyone in my town knows the story of the girl who used mayo as lube and a few days later had maggots in her vaj

User avatar #20 to #19 - kaycie (12/28/2013) [-]
a true story in my school was a girl put apple butter on some guys dick and ate it off

he told everybody and during the black history month assembly at the end of a dance or something one of the black kids just said "Apple butter."
and the whole auditorium burst out laughing and screaming

but the girl cried, I felt bad
#12 - ljhpie ONLINE (12/28/2013) [-]
#38 - jvcjvc (12/28/2013) [+] (3 replies)
In other news, in the village my mom grew up in, there was a guy that got his dick stuck in a bottle during a festival.
User avatar #60 - turboderp (12/28/2013) [+] (1 reply)
This girl in school once used a banana.. What she fail'd to realise is that you shouldn't ever peel the banana first. obviously it broke in two. inside her. she tried to get it out, and it ended up well.. squeeze a banana with a fork and you'll get the picture.. anyway, she couldjn't get it out. In panic she went to the doctor. Unfortunately the only doctor on watch was her.. yes, you guess'd it, father. Awkvawd dad-sister talk right thee I guess..
the good news is, she got it out and is ok..
Bad news, her father doesn't buy bananas anymore.
#51 - nortledrones (12/28/2013) [+] (2 replies)
This image has expired
>Chilling at school
>Spelling test
>I get all the words right
>She gives me a 90.
> ******* whore.
#5 - ramerez (12/27/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #8 - majormoron (12/28/2013) [+] (1 reply)
[gagging internally]
#1 - warlockrichard (12/27/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#6 - anonymous (12/27/2013) [+] (4 replies)
This reminds me of a super cool story I must share with you now.
I worked with a girl who was way into secks toys, but they were too big to use without lube. She got all kinds of horny and was out of lube so she legit used mayo. She failed to get it all cleaned out of her and a few weeks later she started to notice she smelled really bad. This went on for a while and she couldn't figure out why her lolli smelled all yuck and junk. She eventually went to the doctor and the mayo that was left inside of her ruined and started smelling and gave her a nasty infection, which eventually led to cancer, which led to hysterectomy.
True story, kids, or at least she said it was true and I kinda doubt a bitch would own something like that if it wasn't true.
Moral of story: Mayo can kill vaginas.
Pussy runs the world, mayo defeats the pussy, MFW mayo becomes the most powerful weapon in the world
Cool story, brodudes?
inb4 tl;dr
User avatar #23 to #6 - insaneguy (12/28/2013) [-]
so... douchebags aren't necessarily bad?
User avatar #17 - Blargosnarf ONLINE (12/28/2013) [+] (2 replies)
If it's her vagina, why would they be using anal lube? Is it a problem for some women that they don't properly self lubricate?
User avatar #22 to #17 - heartlessrobot (12/28/2013) [-]
Extra lube is never a bad thing.
#50 - cazabrow ONLINE (12/28/2013) [-]
We'll this'll be awkward if people look when I'm switched tabs.
#11 - anonymous (12/28/2013) [+] (3 replies)
Grandpa's Ear of a Cunt
#49 to #43 - zytherman (12/28/2013) [-]
Dude this isn't youtube.   
Take your hate for liking a joke somewhere else
Dude this isn't youtube.
Take your hate for liking a joke somewhere else
User avatar #65 - liamdurf ONLINE (12/28/2013) [+] (1 reply)
WARNING: avoid the horror of the comments, turn back while you have a chance!
#72 to #65 - manirock (12/28/2013) [-]
I didn't listen. I didn't listen!!!
#48 - sanbonzakura (12/28/2013) [-]
omg im crying
omg im crying
#40 - captainhobnob (12/28/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
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