You will never be this much badass. . did you knew? In ‘I Bins, Capiche warrior Goldarina had both hands cut off as punishment far defying the Spanish. He retur funny pics history did you know
Upload
Login or register

You will never be this much badass

Click to block a category:GamingPoliticsNewsComicsAnimeOther
did you knew?
In ‘I Bins, Capiche warrior Goldarina had both
hands cut off as punishment far defying the
Spanish. He returned home, raised an army
and fought the Spanish with blades tied ta the
stubs of his arms.
tumblr. com
...
+1953
Views: 62884 Submitted: 04/26/2014
Hide Comments
sicanoctum has disabled anonymous comments.
Refresh Comments (235)
[ 235 comments ]
asd
#34 - Welshhobo
+280 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Couldn't have done much good, they lost.

There is a lesson to be learned in this though: Don't bring two knife-hands to a Conquistadors-with-guns fight.
#123 to #34 - piddythediddy
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #179 to #34 - theshadowed
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Battle of Otumba is a perfect example of this.
#223 to #34 - silentwarrior
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Actually, the did win the war and were independent for hundreds of years. They were colonized much later, but thats a whole other story. The lesson to be learned here is that two knife-hands is badass!

Source: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arauco_War
#130 to #34 - frankbeeflinks
+5 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
..... conquistadors-with-guns and diseases fight*.
User avatar #195 to #130 - notnewaccount
-1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
They weren't the only ones facing new deseases.

I've read about a battle. One of this "civilizations" with 20.000 warriors (4.000 loses) vs 1 Spanish patrol (4 loses)
That's not just shooting and spreading flu
#229 to #195 - frankbeeflinks
0 123456789123345869
(04/28/2014) [-]
Interesting.... Where can I find the web page or book to read it? Also, I was making a small joke but thanks for the input.
User avatar #234 to #229 - notnewaccount
0 123456789123345869
(04/28/2014) [-]
I found it in this site, but I don't find that battle I told you.
latinamericanhistory.about.com/od/theconquest/a/09armsconquest.htm
You can search it, if you are interested.
One thing. This guy describes us as ruthless assassins who love blood.
The winner writes the history, you know. So we were awful people, usually.
User avatar #233 to #229 - notnewaccount
-1 123456789123345869
(04/28/2014) [-]
I've found this, btw.
"Spanish footsoldiers could use a variety of weapons. Many people incorrectly think that it was firearms that doomed the New World natives, but that's not the case. Some Spanish soldiers used a harquebus, a sort of early musket. The harquebus was undeniably effective against any one opponent, but they are slow to load, heavy, and firing one is a complicated process involving the use of a wick which must be kept lit. The harquebuses were mostly effective for terrorizing native soldiers, who thought the Spanish could create thunder.

Like the harquebus, the crossbow was a European weapon designed to defeat armored knights and too bulky and cumbersome to be of much use in the conquest against the lightly armored, quick natives. Some soldiers used crossbows, but they're very slow to load, break or malfunction easily and their use was not terribly common.

Like the cavalry, Spanish foot soldiers made good use of swords. A heavily armored Spanish foot soldier could cut down dozens of native enemies in minutes with a fine Toledan blade."
#235 to #233 - frankbeeflinks
+1 123456789123345869
(04/28/2014) [-]
Wow! Thanks for all the info its really interesting. Thanks again. Btw funny for you.  Because of the last part of the post I thought of this.
Wow! Thanks for all the info its really interesting. Thanks again. Btw funny for you. Because of the last part of the post I thought of this.
User avatar #232 to #229 - notnewaccount
-1 123456789123345869
(04/28/2014) [-]
I've read it few years ago, so it may take long
#1 - warlockrichard
+188 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
#2 to #1 - sicanoctum [OP]
+4 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
#3 to #2 - warlockrichard
+7 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
#45 to #3 - vonspyder
+2 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
User avatar #99 to #2 - boomerpyro
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
the freedom you stole?
no offense
User avatar #8 to #1 - wellimnotsure
+15 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Histories sorest of losers
User avatar #20 to #8 - captainrattrap
+70 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Well it's mostly cuz Europeans used too many hacks and exploits.

Basically they were that guy in DayZ that yelled FRIENDLY! Then shot you in the back and camped for the whole game while using wallhacks.
#52 to #20 - hansenthirtysix
+10 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
He even waits for you to start sharing supplies and **** too before he does that
#26 to #20 - toohntown
+4 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
I love this analogy so much
User avatar #76 to #20 - meganinja
+1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
I love how people always say the Europeans were so bad blah blah blah.

During the early days of the colonies, Virginia had complete peace with the local Powhatan tribe. They traded with them, and were even on such close terms that they would let the Indians into their homes to talk and eat. One day, the Indians decided that they didn't like there being white people, because they had wanted them as allies for them to destroy other tribes, but the English were neutral in Indian affairs. So they send out Indians to kill literally every settler. They killed half of them, and even then the only reason they didn't kill them all was because in the cities, there were Indians who gave away the plans, but in the countryside it went smoothly.
#180 to #76 - innocentbabies
+1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
>Implying somebody who isn't white could be responsible for war crimes
We all know the Indians only wanted to smoke their peace pipes, and were totally different from every other greedy human that ever lived.
#83 to #76 - haeckal
+1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
There were some initial skirmishes when the English first arrived, but other than that, you are absolutely correct. The English and the Indians had a policy of peaceful coexistence (helped out by Pocahontas), until the Indians decided to go for a surprise massacre in 1622. War followed, and a peace treaty declared in 1633.

Then, in 1644, the Powhatan Indians did the exact same thing again.

**** got real after that.

User avatar #94 to #83 - captainrattrap
+5 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
"Powhatans" So one tribe's crimes justified the genocide of an entire continent??


Kinda like one extremist's group's aggressions justifying the invasion of several islamic nations? Except instead of a few countries, and entire people.
#108 to #94 - haeckal
+2 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
The replacement of American Indians by European settlers in the New World took place over 400 years, and involved many different tribes/nations, who found themselves in many different situations. No one intentionally set out to kill off all the aboriginal peoples across the entire continent - the land was sparsely populated to begin with, and Old World diseases like smallpox were unwittingly unleashed on a previously isolated population with no natural immunities, which accounts for most of the Indian die-off. It was tragic, but not a crime. Population pressure from Europe took care of the rest.

Today there are still millions of Indians living in both North and South America, and many tens of millions more if you count multiracial people (who are the majority in Latin America and the Caribbean).

My example was only meant to illustrate the fact that Indians were more than willing to use "unfair tactics" such as surprise attacks and massacres against white Europeans. There is nothing more intrinsically good, innocent, or noble about being an Indian as opposed to a white person, and history bears this out. We are all human, and we are all capable of doing wrong.
User avatar #178 to #108 - theshadowed
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Well actually smallpox was wittingly unleashed. The British donated blankets to native american tribes. The blankets had been owned by smallpox victims
User avatar #119 to #94 - cabbagemayhem
+1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
You mean the countries that harbor those terrorists, and provide them with resources?
User avatar #191 to #119 - madmario
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
You realize Pakistan and (most likely) Afghanistan were the currupt governments involved in the whole mess. And possibly Iran too. We invaded Iraq. To put this in white people terms, that's like saying a group of Greek rogues attacked the US and were given refuge by the government in Spain and Portugal. So we spend huge sums of time and money for the next 10+ years invading Ukraine. Just saying.
User avatar #230 to #191 - cabbagemayhem
0 123456789123345869
(04/28/2014) [-]
Saddam had been terrorizing his own people for decades. We also had reason to believe they were maintaining weapons of mass destruction. They were still also harboring terrorists, and that was the wrong year to be harboring terrorists.
User avatar #177 to #76 - theshadowed
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
SO one tribe?

How about the fact that the British gave blankets to the native Americans to help them survive the winter. But the blankets were from smallpox victims.
Also the Americans time after time tricked the Indians out of their land and just generally ignored every treaty they made
User avatar #225 to #177 - meganinja
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
It was one example.
#12 - serotonin
+122 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Tradition lives on
Tradition lives on
User avatar #36 to #12 - gayboard
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Lol that ain't terrifying.

Just kick one of it's leg blades out, watch it trip and cut itself
User avatar #38 to #36 - letriggs
+12 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
"just kick the blade out"

now let's think that plan through
as you can see in the gif it walks so can balance on 2 limbs. the blades are attached to the limbs so it can just move the blade out of the way as you go to kick it and then most likely stab you with said blade. It is clearly feral meaning that before you even get close it would pounce and **** your day up. If you were to walk into a place and see that you would automatically stood rooted to the spot voiding your bowels until you have nothing inside you
User avatar #60 to #38 - sagedivinity
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
It's balance doesn't look to good to me, I bet if you flip it on its back it'll have a hard time getting up plus swinging even one arm looks like a pain with its awkward balance it can't stand firmly to the ground to get a clean cut and the blades are only sharp on one side.
User avatar #61 to #60 - broswagonist
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
This all hinging on it having awkward balance, and that looks fine to me, especially with it running (galloping?) at the camera
User avatar #72 to #61 - sagedivinity
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Really? that's the part that seems the worse to me. Still I don't think it would be too nimble and after falling it's screwed.
User avatar #77 to #72 - zoologyexplain
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
I don't know, man. Someone who spends all their time doing something (like, idk... walking on sword limbs) they'd probably get pretty good at it.
User avatar #80 to #77 - sagedivinity
+1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Yea, if it's spent a lot of time walking like that I guess it would be skilled, but I've never seen the movie so I'm not sure how much time it has actually been.
#40 to #38 - letriggs
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #39 to #38 - gayboard
-4 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
then just drop kick it. done
User avatar #41 to #39 - letriggs
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
"the blades are attached to the limbs so it can just move the blade out of the way as you go to kick it and then most likely stab you with said blade. It is clearly feral meaning that before you even get close it would pounce and **** your day up. If you were to walk into a place and see that you would automatically stood rooted to the spot voiding your bowels until you have nothing inside you" - letriggs
User avatar #43 to #41 - gayboard
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
"then just drop kick it. done" -- Jimi Hendrix
User avatar #50 to #36 - cryingchicken
+4 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
I bet you win all of the imaginary fights you get into.
User avatar #82 to #36 - theism
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Or just shoot it, it can't be very good at dodging.
User avatar #74 to #12 - thepandaking
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
can someone explain how this even works as a villain? the "feet" are points, you need at least 3 points for a stable base, so if it rears up to use its arms wouldn't it be insanely off balance? unless it came at you and just raised one arm to cut you which would be pretty easy to focus on just one...
#154 to #74 - daemascus
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
think of a horse rearing up and kicking. but knifes instead of hooves
User avatar #155 to #154 - thepandaking
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
but a horse has more joints, and wide hooves. I'm just saying the balance would be terrible
#157 to #155 - daemascus
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
i have a feeling that it may be somewhat supernatural
User avatar #159 to #157 - thepandaking
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
probably. Then it would be 2spoopy, but if it was a normal thing, it probably wouldn't be so hard to fend off.
User avatar #84 to #12 - thetom
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
its like the suffering.... but its not
User avatar #21 to #12 - alphaben
+2 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Sauce?
User avatar #31 to #21 - toguro
+6 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Tokyo Gore Police.
#102 to #31 - terf
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
The movie where, like, household appliances grow from serious wounds?
User avatar #219 to #102 - toguro
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
I havent actually seen it I just know that this gif comes from it.
#69 to #21 - juicyy
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #23 to #21 - therealrottilargo
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
yo-yo tokyo cop?
User avatar #35 to #23 - lawlight
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
tokyo hakusho cop ?
#87 to #12 - tazzerz
+9 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#55 to #12 - darkvanquish
+15 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#62 to #12 - jdubbb
+16 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
he looks like he might know this guy
he looks like he might know this guy
#19 to #12 - guardianranger
+21 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
KILL IT KILL IT!
KILL IT KILL IT!
#70 to #19 - juicyy
+2 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Yeah Death Race 2000
#53 - mrjoobs
+57 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Paint skills: 9001
#6 - RedHulk
+13 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**RedHulk rolled image** Did he win?
**RedHulk rolled image** Did he win?
User avatar #24 to #6 - kindremind
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**kindremind rolls 26** God damn it
User avatar #28 to #24 - groovierpoet
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**groovierpoet rolls 24**
User avatar #25 to #6 - thesavagebreast
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**thesavagebreast rolls 24** check these dubs!
#27 to #6 - bobthebean
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**bobthebean rolls 34** Who cares
#29 to #6 - clemley
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#30 to #6 - clemley
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#44 to #6 - listerthepessimist
+3 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**listerthepessimist rolls 02**
User avatar #10 to #6 - hairysmellyanus
-1 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**hairysmellyanus rolls 84** check em faggots
User avatar #78 to #6 - ubisoft
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
**ubisoft rolls 13** Swish
#79 to #78 - ubisoft
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
#88 to #6 - swampwaterjack
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
**swampwaterjack rolls 56**
**swampwaterjack rolls 56**
#115 to #6 - iatedub
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#15 to #6 - kungfulouie
+1 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**kungfulouie rolls 43**   
   
You say something?
**kungfulouie rolls 43**

You say something?
#16 to #15 - kungfulouie
+12 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Nevermind
Nevermind
User avatar #7 to #6 - litlekalsoy
+2 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Evidently not
#66 to #6 - tomahawkkit
+2 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
**tomahawkkit rolls 56** shwish
#18 to #6 - sanbonzakura
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #32 to #6 - clemley
-1 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**clemley rolls 92** this is my third time trying to roll for the first time
User avatar #63 to #6 - rohedje
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
**rohedje rolls 71** lets see if we are lucky today
#64 to #63 - rohedje
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
User avatar #9 to #6 - karvarausku
-1 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**karvarausku rolls 26** let's try...
User avatar #120 to #9 - geiner
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
**geiner rolls 65**
User avatar #49 to #6 - RedHulk
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
**RedHulk rolls 036**
User avatar #11 to #6 - quotes
+42 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
"However Mendoza's command broke Galvarino's division after over an hour of combat and won the battle killing three thousand Indians, and captured more than eight hundred including him"

nope not even close
#220 to #11 - cannibalvegan
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #47 - useroftheLOLZ
+25 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
And then, an epic battle against the Spanish ensued. Where his numbers numbered at around 20,000, and the Spanish, only 600, including the man who ordered his hand's cut. And then an hour later, Galvarino's forces were defeated, having only managed to wound a bunch of Spanish Soldiers, and kill a bunch of horses, while his casualties numbered at around 3000. He was then executed by being thrown to the dogs.

Much badass.
Very history.
Simple google.
Wow.
#71 to #47 - futuremarinesniper
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
should have cut his achilles tendents and made him walk home
User avatar #124 to #47 - adrilazzaro
+1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
you couldve mentioned the fact the spanish had guns and steel armor
User avatar #196 to #124 - notnewaccount
-1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
You could've mentioned we've been in the world the same time and they still had stone swords.
If you have more technology than your enemy, why would you be ashamed if you use it against him?
User avatar #226 to #196 - adrilazzaro
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
er im just saying its not particularly a heroic battle that deserves praise when you easily out-tech your enemy
User avatar #228 to #226 - notnewaccount
-1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Yeah, but again. It was in the battlefield and still 1 to 33'3...
It's like dropping an atomic bomb on a city. Or like fighting muslim terrorists with bombers, helicopters, way better weapons,...
You know. But we are not anglo-saxons. So it's not as glorious... I guess
User avatar #54 to #47 - serotonin
+17 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Well one has to admire his determination.
Spaniards should have had greater sense of humor...should have cut his legs second time and attach knifes to them and just leave him
#67 to #54 - imnotkickthecat
+20 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
You would of made the best imperialist commander.
User avatar #75 to #67 - chewiewhatawookie
+2 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
I read that in jack's voice.
User avatar #56 to #54 - articulate
0 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
You've got a future in this business.
#92 - fzbarbeque
+22 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #98 to #92 - carlsforcedhunger
+2 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
i had to go further down than i thought i would to see that.
#186 - lastgentleman
+21 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
How did he wipe his arse doe
User avatar #199 to #186 - mrgoodlove
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Spread cheeks for a clean poop
User avatar #203 to #186 - slarzie
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
dnt forget fapping
#221 to #186 - harbingerwolf
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Who wipes?
User avatar #194 to #186 - xSly
+4 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Ever heard of the Spreadeagle Position?
#204 to #186 - datgermanguy
+10 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
Very carefully
Very carefully
#57 - dinocaster
+21 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Galvarino when he returned
Galvarino when he returned
User avatar #59 to #57 - mikhailovych
+16 123456789123345869
(04/26/2014) [-]
Except he lost, badly
User avatar #197 to #59 - notnewaccount
-1 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
No, Galvarino is already the one who dies in the gif. Don't you see they took off his knives?
User avatar #169 - hellomynameisbill
+15 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
what handy battle strategy
User avatar #171 to #169 - darkeyedangel
0 123456789123345869
(04/27/2014) [-]
i am both mad and amused
[ 235 comments ]