Watch out, I’m packing heat…. Watch out, I’m packing heat… BIT SCARED WALKING HOME AT NIGHT? BETTER GET THE CAR KEY KNUCKLE l
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Watch out, I’m packing heat…

Watch out, I’m packing heat…

Tags: funny
Views: 9395
Favorited: 2
Submitted: 05/13/2014
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User avatar #1 - frostdrachen (05/13/2014) [+] (30 replies)
When I'm in a city, I tend to wear a chainmail shirt as a middle layer. Talk about paranoid, but so far it has saved me once during the two years I've had it.

So, it had been a bar night and I was walking home. I wasn't that drunk, a nice buzz.

A random guy walked by and asked for a cig, but I don't smoke. I kept on walking and I felt a stab on my lower back. The guy was standing behind me with a large-ish knife, looking dumbfounded.

The mail shirt had mostly stopped the blade, only a quarter inch got through. I was lucky that the blade wasn't smaller, as it would have gotten farther in if it had been. The wound left was very small and didn't bleed much.

I ran away. I probably couldn't have beaten him. I got home safely and put a band-aid on the wound.
User avatar #4 to #1 - meganinja (05/14/2014) [-]
why chainmail of all things? That's not going to protect you for shit. What you need my friend, is some high quality plate armor. Ain't nobody fuck with a guy wearing a motherfucking suit of armor. 'But Meganinja, everybody knows that guns pierce armor!' Niggas don't know that son. They see a guy walking around in a knight suit and they ain't messing with your ass.

You may also be interested in my weapon set. Some guy pulls a knife on you, and you pull a mace on him. Not that pussy spray, but a fucking mace with spikes and shit. God damn son, nobody's gonna want to be within a mile of you.

Limited time only. Products shown may not be as gansta as advertised.
#17 - jafkdb (05/14/2014) [-]
Just FYI, trying to use your car keys in that fashion will tear up the skin in between your fingers, and make it near impossible to keep fighting if you have to. You would be better off holding a single key like a normal knife that you can stab with.
User avatar #9 - dreadedsin (05/14/2014) [-]
I prefer my 'Recompense of the fallen'
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