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uncle anally devastates poor nephew

Very Lonely Luke (y/ ery/ sly/ Luke -
Kyle Ren, what' s up with the cape?
It serves no purpose.
It you' re eon, stop being pretentious and put on El coat.
Emu Kyle Ren @ -
this is El lot to take from someone who used to dress like El
Clockwork Orange extra
...
+1816
Views: 52951
Favorited: 132
Submitted: 01/07/2016
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[ 148 comments ]
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Reply
+158
#12 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
Reply
+47
#71 to #12 - sgtmajjohnson (01/08/2016) [-]
Damn straight. Replace FN-2187 with cheater.
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+89
#10 to #9 - unfitninjuh ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
yet another unrealistic expectation for women
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+580
#5 - lordknightmare ONLINE (01/07/2016) [-]
the piggyback rides are a crucial part of jedihood
no wonder Kylo turned into a dark side asshole
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+93
#6 to #5 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/07/2016) [-]
Rey looks like she **** herself.
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+19
User avatar #87 to #57 - fuckscreennames (01/08/2016) [-]
"your shield you must drop, young woolsworth"
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+2
#110 to #57 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
jesus **** . I need more SBF fan-art.
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+1
User avatar #142 to #57 - lordknightmare ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Pat would be a terrible jedi master
******* go Sith for the chance of immortality
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+326
#1 - tryg (01/07/2016) [-]
GIF
Little did they know about Darth Vader
-1
#2 to #1 - cubsy has deleted their comment [-]
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+15
#30 to #1 - einsampibroch ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
No! No, that's impossible!
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+33
#99 to #30 - gabemczombie (01/08/2016) [-]
Trust your instincs. Yousa know it to be true.
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+5
#127 to #99 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
>no jarjar bb8
>no jarjar chewbacca
>no jarjar r2d2
>doesnt say jarjar abrams

i rate 2/10, try harder
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+99
User avatar #7 to #1 - xCONGiEx (01/08/2016) [-]
Who ******* did this?
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+103
#8 to #7 - nerdmen (01/08/2016) [-]
a monster
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-5
User avatar #54 to #7 - Deavas (01/08/2016) [-]
Shut the **** up
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+3
User avatar #91 to #54 - tarabostes (01/08/2016) [-]
Who ******* did this?
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+3
#109 to #91 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
a monster
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+35
#13 - gedoushinken (01/08/2016) [-]
I wonder if we are gonna get another shocking twist like Empire in the second one.
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0
User avatar #48 to #13 - afaik (01/08/2016) [-]
Friggin' scorchin'
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0
#102 to #13 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
who dat girl?
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-2
User avatar #131 to #13 - billybongthornton (01/08/2016) [-]
Pretty sure Jar Jar aBrams will simply do the same thing he did for FA, hit up Wikipedia and add some sparkle to the Empire Strikes back plot, then tack in some more overacted **** chat for Rey, Finn etc and have Kylo Bitch Tits Ren pull some even more weak ass **** and lose in a lightsaber duel to Leia or ******** .
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0
#140 to #131 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
Thank you for pointing out all the things i hated about this movie.
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+55
#14 to #13 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
yeah. If some ******** doesn't spoil it and spam it all over the ******* internet like they did this time
yeah. If some ******** doesn't spoil it and spam it all over the ******* internet like they did this time
Reply
+12
#21 to #14 - gedoushinken (01/08/2016) [-]
I'll stay off the internet while I can. I was successful until I went on Omegle.
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0
User avatar #15 to #14 - wtfduud (01/08/2016) [-]
People were spoiling it when Empire came out too.
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+18
User avatar #17 to #15 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
yeah but it wasn't spammed to the ******* heavens thanks to the fact that the internet wasn't a thing yet and the fact that george, kasdan, and kirshner kept it completely under wraps until the movie actually came out.

Han's death was spoiled for me way back in october thanks to some faggot.
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+1
User avatar #18 to #15 - schneidend (01/08/2016) [-]
Yeah, but only like four people knew the twist in Empire until it was released.
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0
User avatar #19 to #18 - wtfduud (01/08/2016) [-]
I said when it came out.
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+1
User avatar #20 to #19 - schneidend (01/08/2016) [-]
Yeah I get that. VII was spoiled months in advance.
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0
User avatar #92 to #20 - tarabostes (01/08/2016) [-]
I'm sorry to hear that...
0
#16 to #15 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE Comment deleted by huntergriff [-]
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0
User avatar #132 to #14 - listerthepessimist (01/08/2016) [-]
spoilers are the new meme it seems
Reply
+51
User avatar #23 to #13 - leonhardt (01/08/2016) [-]
50 bucks says
>Rey is Luke's daughter
>Snoke is actually Darth Plaugeius the Wise
>Chewie dies
>Leia dies
>Kylo Ren kills Luke
>Po betrays the Republic
>Finn betrays the Republic
>Tr8t0r becomes a Jedi
Reply
+20
User avatar #27 to #23 - smartythechicken ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
i dont know why but i thought it said "kylo is lukes daughter"
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+21
User avatar #34 to #27 - leonhardt (01/08/2016) [-]
Yes perfect
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+5
User avatar #37 to #27 - jvair (01/08/2016) [-]
No... I am your daughter, search your feelings and you know is true
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+5
User avatar #38 to #23 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Oh there's no way luke's going to survive this trilogy. Chewie may. but Luke, i highly doubt.
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+7
User avatar #40 to #38 - leonhardt (01/08/2016) [-]
He'll probably die and come back as a force ghost

Hopefully a more active force ghost

I wanna see a Force Ghost Luke go and ****** haunt people
Reply
+10
User avatar #46 to #40 - peliaosfiendline (01/08/2016) [-]
Can you imagine a Jedi dying, becoming a Force ghost, and then just passive aggressively haunting the Sith that killed them?

>Sith is picking out clothes for the day
"We both know you're going to pick that basic black cloak, it's the only thing you really have. And yes, it does make you look fat."
>Sith prepares to enter a Lightsaber duel
"Oh, you going to start this one off with [insert saber technique that Sith usually uses early on to great effect, being kind of their signature and how they killed this particular Force Ghost], or save it till the end? You know, I've been noticing some weaknesses to it lately. *rattles off long ass list*"

etc etc
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+9
User avatar #77 to #46 - sgtmajjohnson (01/08/2016) [-]
It would be so easy to torment Kylo Ren. "What, are you gonna cry? Throw your little tantrum and cut the computers apart? It's not gonna make you Vader."
"Sweet mask, Vader's was cooler though. And he made two better lightsabers."
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+1
User avatar #105 to #23 - ztron (01/08/2016) [-]
Or Darth Maul showing since him being alive is canon through the clone wars.
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0
User avatar #144 to #105 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
if that was maul, he'd have horns.
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0
#145 to #144 - ztron (01/09/2016) [-]
He did have horns.
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0
User avatar #147 to #145 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/09/2016) [-]
Oh, disregard...I misread.
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#146 to #145 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE Comment deleted by huntergriff [-]
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+1
#24 to #23 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
I doubt both Chewie and Leia will die in the same movie, if at all. I'm betting Chewie will die, though, he'll probably see Ren in 8 have be filled with Wookie Rage and charge at Ren, maybe do some damage to him before dying so he can be with Han. I doubt Finn or Poe will betray the Resistance, too, it makes no sense
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0
User avatar #26 to #24 - leonhardt (01/08/2016) [-]
You say "That doesn't make sense" like Episode 2 never happened.
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+1
#28 to #26 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
Finn already betrayed the FO, it would be stupid to have him betray someone again. And Poe is basically Luke minus the Jedi powers, he's a hero for the Resistance, there's 0 reason for him to betray them. Also, I'm drawing a blank on what you're referring to in ep 2
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0
User avatar #33 to #28 - leonhardt (01/08/2016) [-]
Why would Jango Fett, the only person that could tie the Clone Army to the Separatists, ever be anywhere near the Jedi they're trying to lead to Kamino to discover the clone army while trying to assassinate a Republic Senator?
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0
#39 to #33 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
You kind of answered your own question, didn't you? His whole point was to lead them to Kamino so Papa Palpatine could use the army
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0
User avatar #41 to #39 - leonhardt (01/08/2016) [-]
Yes but if he was captured on Coruscant with that changeling lady, it would've blown Palpatine's entire scheme wide ******* open
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0
#42 to #41 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
That's true, but something you have to remember with stuff like this is that Lucas is **** at telling stories, he had to make it so everything ended for 4 to happen, so people like Jango had plot armor(for the most part)
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0
User avatar #70 to #42 - holycrapimacupcake (01/08/2016) [-]
Also keep in mind, it's Jango ******* Fett, the Mandalore!
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0
User avatar #29 to #28 - gedoushinken (01/08/2016) [-]
Double agent.
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0
User avatar #32 to #29 - ohemgeezus ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
I doubt if Poe was a double agent the FO would be cool with him blowing up Starkiller
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0
#35 to #32 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
Watch him be like Snoak (Snoke?) 's apprentice or some ****
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0
User avatar #36 to #35 - ohemgeezus ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Snoke
I would be very disappointed if that were actually the case, it would definitely be a twist because Poe is such a nice carefree guy
Reply
0
#50 to #26 - nerdking (01/08/2016) [-]
Episode 2 didn't happen, it was just a bad dream.
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0
User avatar #120 to #23 - sudminator (01/08/2016) [-]
Unpopular opinion incoming.......I think Finn is Lukes son......
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0
User avatar #121 to #120 - sudminator (01/08/2016) [-]
****************** Snoke is Plagueis...
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0
User avatar #84 to #23 - caesarslegion (01/08/2016) [-]
Maybe Snoke is a Yuuzahn Vong. I know the EU is gone, but Disney could still play with it. Say that they're heavy dark side users now.

Honestly it'd be better them just rehashing the original trilogy with different names for everything
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0
User avatar #108 to #84 - Gandalfthewhite (01/08/2016) [-]
What i think would be a cool idea is if Snoke hires out an 'external force' (i.e. the Yuuzahn Vong) to help with the first orders war efforts as mercenaries but in the end they keep bringing too many of their own kind and it spins out of control so they start to destroy and take over the first order and try to invade the whole galaxy. Would be like Saxon Mercenaries in Britain who turned on the natives and full on invaded
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-2
#83 to #23 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
JJ already confirmed snoke isnt plaugeius
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0
User avatar #122 to #83 - sudminator (01/08/2016) [-]
And he said the bad guy in ST2 ISN'T Khan........
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0
User avatar #88 to #83 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Source?
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0
User avatar #75 to #23 - sgtmajjohnson (01/08/2016) [-]
That would be a lot of plot twists for one movie. Is M. Night Shamalamadingdong directing Episode VIII?
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-1
#55 to #23 - asasqw (01/08/2016) [-]
GIF
>Too obvious
>Yeah probably
>Better go out with something on par with having a moon thrown at you
>Yeah probably
>Luke won't put his guard down after what happened to Han
>Kamakazi into something
>Yeah probably
>He becomes a jedi hunter on par with animated grievous
Reply
+4
#76 to #55 - selfdenyingbeggar (01/08/2016) [-]
"too obvious" once you knew Han was Kylo's father you knew Kylo would kill him.

It was obvious Han would die because he always wanted that, and who better to kill him for dramatic effects than his son?
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0
#47 to #23 - solomonkane ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
-True Jedis don't really have kids.
-Thats what im getting a lot of, i still doubt he is though.
-Thats probably 50/50
-Also 50/50
-That would mean Kylo Ren is killing off most of the main cast of the first trilogy.
- **** the Republic, right?
-Nines is dead
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+4
User avatar #61 to #47 - kittywithclaws ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
That was under the Jedi Order of the prequel Republic, and there were still exceptions (Ki-Adi-Mundi was allowed due to a lack of males in his species, and had 5 wives and 7 children). After the rise and fall of the Empire, Luke was the only Jedi left to form the new Jedi Order, and in the old EU he got rid of the rule against relationships (even had a son himself). I think in the new canon, he probably made the same choice, given that one of the main reasons Vader became Sith and the previous Order fell was due to the fact he had to keep his relationship a secret.
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0
#62 to #61 - solomonkane ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
The main reason Anakin fell to the dark side was because he was very angry and fearful. It had nothing to do with keeping his marriage a secret.

I highly doubt that Rey is Lukes kid. One of the MAIN reason why I think so is because we're already assuming it. We see it coming. We're being thrown another curve ball.
Reply
+2
#107 to #62 - greyblade (01/08/2016) [-]
if anakin hadn't been forced to keep his marriage a secret, he probably would've been able to deal with his anger and fear better. if he could trust Obi Wan and the council, he might not have turned to palpatine for help.
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0
User avatar #63 to #62 - kittywithclaws ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Oh, i dont think Rey is Luke's kid, simply because it seems way too obvious. It'd be more of a plot twist if she wasn't. Was just talking about the fact that the rules against relationships don't exist anymore
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0
#67 to #63 - solomonkane ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Look, the rule is there for a reason. A pretty good one. Jedis aren't allowed to have relationships because it can and probably will **** with their minds. Look what happened to Anakin. If he had followed that rule, the Jedis wouldn't have been wiped out.
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+2
#89 to #67 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Anakin fell because of that rule, if no one gave a **** he wouldn't have fallen, and sidious wouldn't have had any way to tempt him, and would have gotten another jedi to do it and then anakin, along with the rest of the jedi would have been slaughtered, unless they found out about it in time. .
Reply
+1
#112 to #89 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
The secrecy of Anakins relationship with padmé wasn't the reason he wen't to the darkside.

IT WAS HIS FEAR OF THE DEATH OF EVERYONE WHO EVER LOVED HIM.
His mother, padmé, their children.
HE JOINED THE DARIKSIDE BECAUSE HE WANTED TO MASTER A DARKSIDE TECHNIQUE.
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0
User avatar #133 to #89 - boarderlinegreat (01/08/2016) [-]
Anakin IMO fell ultimately because he was manipulated from both sides. If it wasn't for the last mistake, Mace Windu insisting of killing Sidius, which is weird because they didn't act, react nor decide anything up until that point, it would have went differently I think.

Anakin was still unsure which side to pick up until that point.
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0
#106 to #89 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
except for the whole anakin being the most powerful force user alive at the time, being born completely of the force and being the chosen one, he was kind of destined to fall from the light side. If it wasn't Padme, it would have been something else.
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0
#66 to #63 - solomonkane ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
They still do until they say they dont.
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+1
User avatar #56 to #47 - holycrapimacupcake (01/08/2016) [-]
When Luke formed the new order he created his own rules. He said Jedi can have romantic attachments, so long as they do not interfere with their work.
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0
#58 to #56 - solomonkane ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
That ***** not canon anymore.
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+3
User avatar #60 to #58 - holycrapimacupcake (01/08/2016) [-]
I think they're pulling pieces out and placing it in. Luke's new laws might be one of them.
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0
#64 to #60 - solomonkane ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Somehow I doubt it, That rule was put in there for a reason and well.. look what happened when someone went against it.
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+3
User avatar #69 to #64 - holycrapimacupcake (01/08/2016) [-]
Quinlan Voss had a child, turned out fine, Ki Adi Mundi had many wives and children, turned out fine, aside from his troops killing him, Luke himself had a son named Ben Skywalker, went dark for a year or so, came back to the light and helped defeat numerous threats against the New Jedi Order.
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0
#74 to #69 - solomonkane ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
Why do you keep using non canon **** to back up your argument? What is canon? Anakin wiping out the jedi order to save Padme. Because he didnt follow the rule of No Love.
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+3
User avatar #82 to #74 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
>>#78

To be fair, Disney and lucasfilm did say they're going to be taking things from the old canon and bringing it into the new canon such as a solo falling to the dark side, han and leia getting married and having a kid, and Rakata prime among other things.

That being said though, while Vos is canon (he even has a mention in episode 3 and shows up in episode I, and he's been in canon content such as SW the clone wars and SW: Dark Desciple) , he didn't have a son in this continuity, and as far as I know neither did ki-adi mundi.

However, it's possible that luke saw the errors in the old jedi order, and saw why his father fell, that he could have done away with the stupid parts of the jedi code like his legends counterpart.
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+3
User avatar #78 to #74 - holycrapimacupcake (01/08/2016) [-]
Ki Adi is still canon, as is Voss.
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0
User avatar #79 to #64 - holycrapimacupcake (01/08/2016) [-]
Anakin was impulsive. He was not trained at the age most are. He had attachments already.
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+1
User avatar #51 to #47 - leonhardt (01/08/2016) [-]
Jedi can, and are sometimes encouraged to have children if they're strong with the force, though.
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0
#53 to #51 - solomonkane ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
The Jedi code says no attachments. Hell, they even chant No Emotion or Passion in their Mantra.
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+26
#31 to #13 - tyrathius ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
She's... She's beautiful!

I must meet this woman!
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0
#138 to #31 - drewjitsu (01/08/2016) [-]
Sorry Bolvar, but the Lich King is dead. The world must never know of your sacrifice.
Reply
+27
User avatar #3 - fightforfate ONLINE (01/07/2016) [-]
both of these accounts are probably run by the same person
Reply
+1
User avatar #124 to #3 - vishnarg ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
They're most definitely not. The grammar and style of argument is completely different. Plus they would do this more often if that were the case.
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0
#137 to #124 - drewjitsu (01/08/2016) [-]
Ever notice how every character in any given book speaks with the exact same speech patterns?...
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+64
User avatar #4 to #3 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/07/2016) [-]
and?
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+15
#49 - stealingbikes ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
More like Kylo Rekt am I rite?
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+9
#25 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
GIF
**anonymous used "*roll picture*"**
**anonymous rolled image** what do
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+9
#22 - sherlockbatman ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
**sherlockbatman used "*roll picture*"****sherlockbatman rolled image** "Rey, I am your father ... I've waited so long to say that "
**sherlockbatman used "*roll picture*"**
**sherlockbatman rolled image**
"Rey, I am your father
... I've waited so long to say that "
Reply
+15
#85 - nopenopejustnope (01/08/2016) [-]
I actually like kylo ren
Reply
+8
User avatar #96 to #85 - rabaneristo (01/08/2016) [-]
I think he's meant to be liked. He's lost on the dark side, sure, but he's human. He has fears and goals. He struggles. Vader was ******* awesome on the original trilogy, but he was not relatable at all. He was no human, not untill the very end.
I think they did with Kylo what they tried to do with Anakin in the prequels, with the difference that they didn't failed miserably this time.
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-2
#125 to #96 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
God, why dont you say that to my face you dirty whore
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+7
#113 - redclover (01/08/2016) [-]
piggyback rides are essential to Jedi training
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+5
#117 to #113 - sudminator (01/08/2016) [-]
GIF
Jedi training is weird.....
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0
User avatar #119 to #45 - sudminator (01/08/2016) [-]
Only pussies hustle tho, MEN work hard for their **** .
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+5
#114 - cursesnew (01/08/2016) [-]
I'm willing to bet that the light side in Kylo Ren is actually Darth Vader trying to get him back to it. Seeing how Darth Vader got turned back by Luke.
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0
User avatar #116 to #114 - sudminator (01/08/2016) [-]
.......nice.
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+2
#130 to #114 - tomthehippie (01/08/2016) [-]
I want to see ghost Vader/Anakin show up and tell Ren he is just being a little bitch and the lightside is where it is at.
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+1
User avatar #143 to #130 - huntergriff [OP]ONLINE (01/08/2016) [-]
well, they were originally going to have anakin show up as a ghost...so...maybe next time.
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0
#148 to #143 - tomthehippie (01/09/2016) [-]
Anakin shows up as a force ghost
Kylo says "Who the **** do you think you are?"
Anakin says "I... am Darth Vader."
"NOOOOOOOOO"
"Search your feelings Kylo.... you know it to be true..."
"Bu... bu.. dark side! Muh rage!"
"Shut up. Force, was I as much of an emo bitch as you when I was your age? Grow the **** up and mourn the fact that you killed your own father. **** , half the reason I went dark side was my mom was killed."
"YOU LIE! Vader is my idol! He was the greatest sith to ever use a red lightsaber!"
"Do I have to force choke you? Seriously, if you keep being this much of a bitch I'm going to force choke you."
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0
User avatar #135 to #126 - huzibizi (01/08/2016) [-]
i don't get it, but this guy was born in the same hospital as me
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0
User avatar #136 to #135 - huzibizi (01/08/2016) [-]
oh thats the traitor guy from star wars lol
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+5
#93 - tarabostes (01/08/2016) [-]
Click to show spoiler
In the new star wars Kylo Ren teams up with...
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+2
User avatar #95 to #93 - herecomesjohnny (01/08/2016) [-]
well he did fookin wreck everyone on his path during his emo phase
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0
User avatar #141 to #95 - feelythefeel (01/08/2016) [-]
>tfw you realize that he isn't supposed to be cool, he's supposed to be what a complete dweeb thinks is cool
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-1
User avatar #97 to #95 - tarabostes (01/08/2016) [-]
Including MJ hehe...... and i'm gonna wreck you too
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-1
#100 to #98 - tarabostes (01/08/2016) [-]
N-No! Wait! Come back to papa it's not as bad as it sounds!
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+2
#128 - ninjasinthedark (01/08/2016) [-]
GIF
**ninjasinthedark used "*roll picture*"**
**ninjasinthedark rolled image**
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+2
User avatar #129 to #128 - ghostninjaguy (01/08/2016) [-]
Rolling Caboose is a good sign
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+2
#86 - aexhaustedheadcase (01/08/2016) [-]
Anyone else feel rey being lukes daughter is to obvious?
Ok sure so far the sequels javent exactly shown the most originality
But i just feel like its to obvious a reveal.
Then again i cant really see who else here parentd could be. Unless somehow shes the spawn of obiwans forbidden love with a tusken raider or something
Reply
+1
#94 to #86 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
i found the fact that a main character being a coward stormtrooper was original enough
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+1
User avatar #11 - harleyquinzel (01/08/2016) [-]
I saw this all unfolding and it's gold. I hope the Han account gets mixed in.
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0
#43 to #11 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
About that...
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+2
User avatar #81 to #11 - sgtmajjohnson (01/08/2016) [-]
Force Awakens spoilers: He would've, but the owner of the Kylo Ren account killed the owner of the Han Solo account.
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+1
#111 - anisbanana (01/08/2016) [-]
clockwork orange EXTRA? EXTRA WHAT????? CHEESE?!?!??!!
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0
User avatar #134 to #111 - gentlemanofbacon (01/08/2016) [-]
people in the background of movies
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+1
#52 - anon (01/08/2016) [-]
youre no darth vader
ANALLY DEVASTATED
12>
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