Trebuchet vs Girlfriend

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The choice is obvious.

Tags: trebuchet | vs | girlfriend

Girlfriend/ Boyfriend Trebuchet
provides you with affection -provides you with the means to bombard castles
needs your support -needs only the support of a few stout oaken beams
may have sex with you -would always have sex with you if it could
makes other people think l/ tou'" not a h:: sser -makes other people fear the approach of your armies
hides behind barriers -destroys barriers with payloads of flaming stone
cilian make parties a drag -great at parties
financially draining -financially sound investment
will leave you over stupid **** -will leave you the master of your opponent' s cities

...

+1260

Views:	47520
Favorited:	126
Submitted:	03/13/2015

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[ 93 comments ]

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68 comments displayed.

+324

#2 - avatarsarefornoobs (03/13/2015) [-]

oh god dont tempt me
i cant start using a trebuchet, what if my ballista found out?

#67 to #2 - anon (03/14/2015) [-]

If your ballista found out it might go ballistic...

ok, I'll put the meme for you in advance...

#40 to #2 - shittingmangos (03/14/2015) [-]

#50 to #2 - baronvonhuckle (03/14/2015) [-]

WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE MANGONEL!?

#79 to #50 - adzoh (03/14/2015) [-]

****** that's a Perrier

+12

#31 to #2 - warzon (03/14/2015) [-]

They would be perfectly okay with sharing.

+113

#1 - knightems (03/13/2015) [-]

Yes but can the trebuchet suck my dick without launching it into a castle wall?

#5 to #1 - accountforstripey has deleted their comment [-]

+12

#3 to #1 - whitelapras (03/13/2015) [-]

that sounds like fun though

+12

#11 to #1 - theism ONLINE (03/13/2015) [-]

With a few modifications anything can suck your dick without launching it into a castle wall.

+30

#4 to #1 - echotheambient (03/13/2015) [-]

why would you not want your dick launched at a castle wall at half the speed of sound?

+41

#6 to #1 - accountforstripey (03/13/2015) [-]

can your girlfriend?

#77 to #6 - anon (03/14/2015) [-]

**anonymous used "*roll picture*"**
**anonymous rolled image** check and mate. tfnogf

+17

#10 - include (03/13/2015) [-]

Too tempting

#45 to #10 - pepemex (03/14/2015) [-]

What game is this?

#49 to #45 - aaauuuggghhh (03/14/2015) [-]

Besiege.

You should check it out.

+31

#21 to #10 - toncheky (03/14/2015) [-]

That's a catapult u pleb.
but it's cool

#23 to #21 - include (03/14/2015) [-]

close enough

+18

#18 - demigodofmadness (03/14/2015) [-]

Reminds me of the time I made a trebuchet for class freshman year of high school.

She left me for my friend who also worked on it with me.

He had a "Bigger garage" and "actually had time to play with her" and "didn't refer to it as a she"

+33

#19 - toncheky (03/14/2015) [-]

I actually made a trebuchet when I was 12-13, launched an egg sized rock like 20m.
I can't believe I actually found 2 pictures of it... this is a good pic but the other is a screenshot from a video probably ( **** video quality on mobile phones in 2009.)
I added more weight later, on pictures it's for tests.

#41 to #19 - chenouttachen (03/14/2015) [-]

That reminds me. Pretty sure my abomination of a trebuchet is in the shed... I think I'll go looking for it tomorrow.

#85 to #41 - toncheky (03/15/2015) [-]

I threw mine away because I made plans for a new one, bigger and better, but couldn't get the materials. Maybe I'll make one this summer.

+21

#20 to #19 - toncheky (03/14/2015) [-]

...and it didn't have sex with me.

+13

#34 to #20 - thememegod ONLINE (03/14/2015) [-]

As long as you tried.
Thats what counts.

+72

#12 - howtostrokeabook (03/13/2015) [-]

>pick both
>fire girl from trebuchet

#22 to #12 - SuperBobbis (03/14/2015) [-]

Jesus Christ. The "fire" bit annoys me way more than it should. You don't fire a trebuchet, you loose it.

+16

#30 to #22 - pootismang (03/14/2015) [-]

I'll loose you like a trebuchet.

#38 to #22 - seriouslyblack (03/14/2015) [-]

gee, well maybe if we didn't have more advanced technology that renders trebuchets obsolete, more people would know the proper nomenclature when referring to it.

im sorry that some people missed the part in history when they taught us the proper grammar to use when referring to using a trebuchet

#47 to #22 - vladhellsing (03/14/2015) [-]

+42

#42 to #12 - thelastelephant (03/14/2015) [-]

>ponies
>positive thumbs

What the **** , man.

#48 to #42 - aaauuuggghhh (03/14/2015) [-]

I thought we were all in agreement

FJ... I thought I loved you

#51 to #42 - SuperBobbis (03/14/2015) [-]

howtostrokeabook is probably the only pony poster that gets thumbs up.

They don't post random ones willy nilly. Its all relevant.

-1

#70 to #51 - greedtheavaricious (03/14/2015) [-]

Don't forget darkjustifier

#72 to #42 - zaucroya (03/14/2015) [-]

It's not ponies that Fj hates, its when bronies bring them up and they are completely irelevant to the content or comment.
We couldn't care less about the fact its ponies, its the bronies that tend to annoy us.

+12

#27 - sovietsamurai (03/14/2015) [-]

Here is an old quote that I think was from 4chan ..

"Why should I spend money on **** like a masters degree to get pussy? Guns don't leave you, they don't try to change you and they don't judge. You would think things like being able to hold a steady job and provide/protect a wife would matter more.

My Raifu and Pistolfu are better wives then actual women.

Dumb whores have all these stupid expectations, when they don't even meet them. Example-
Whore- "I want a guy with big muscles and a big brain and a caring heart"
Meanwhile, she is kinda fat, dumb as a box of rocks, and would rip your heart out because she found a better guy, even though he thinks she is ugly as **** . Dammit, I just want at least a 7/10 that is smart, funny, likes guns and doesn't have weird nipples."

#35 to #27 - bazda (03/14/2015) [-]

...almost brought a tear to my eye.

#56 to #27 - tarabostes ONLINE (03/14/2015) [-]

That was beautiful
if only there was a gun who could turn into a girl...
"Senpai squeeze my trigger"
You need to login to view this link

#78 to #56 - sovietsamurai (03/14/2015) [-]

I ******* love you no homo

#81 to #78 - tarabostes ONLINE (03/14/2015) [-]

I love ******* you да

#71 to #27 - bwiedieter (03/14/2015) [-]

>that feel when you live in Europe and can´t have any cool raifus and have to settle for pyoosey

+11

#43 - kmichel (03/14/2015) [-]

Would always have sex with you if it could.

#57 to #43 - bigbrostrider (03/14/2015) [-]

#53 to #43 - xoyv (03/14/2015) [-]

#54 to #53 - giffythetoad (03/14/2015) [-]

#55 to #54 - xoyv (03/14/2015) [-]

#69 to #53 - brothergrimm (03/14/2015) [-]

Still a better love story than twilight.... i felt obligated

#58 to #53 - tarabostes ONLINE (03/14/2015) [-]

Why couldn't their love exist like Pygmalion when he fell in love with his statue...

+10

#25 - SirSheepy (03/14/2015) [-]

#59 to #25 - tarabostes ONLINE (03/14/2015) [-]

#24 - conoriskool (03/14/2015) [-]

MFW Trebuchet slaps my girl's ass at a party and stares me down

+39

#7 - sociopathstan (03/13/2015) [-]

fixed so as not to offend reality

#29 to #7 - cancerlobster has deleted their comment [-]

#9 to #7 - kolya (03/13/2015) [-]

this guy...this guy knows whats happening

#39 - katarinaismywaifu (03/14/2015) [-]

>Would have sex with you if it could

That. That truly won me over. Trebuchet is best waifu.

#64 - xfz (03/14/2015) [-]

That feel when no trebuchet

#82 to #64 - starkexpanse has deleted their comment [-]

#44 - anon (03/14/2015) [-]

I'D CHOOSE LEFT ONE, BECAUSE I COULD **** PUSSY

AND I'M SCARED OF TREBUCHET SIZE DILDO UP MY ARSE

#62 to #44 - thedarkestrogue (03/14/2015) [-]

everything is a dildo if youre brave enough

you sir are not brave enough

#28 - whomadewho (03/14/2015) [-]

Me to the trebuchet

#68 - thisistheguy (03/14/2015) [-]

"great at parties"

#61 - thedarkestrogue (03/14/2015) [-]

If thats how you see having a girlfriend / if thats what your girlfriend does to you

you're with the wrong ******* person

#63 to #61 - giffythetoad (03/14/2015) [-]

#83 to #61 - starkexpanse (03/14/2015) [-]

People suck at relationships and have low standards when choosing them to begin with, then get all bitter about it and complain on the internet. What's new?