Superpowers. . Taille USELESS SUPERPOWERS. i think some of these are actually pretty useful, with 75% levitation you could jump really high easily. with 1 second super strength youd win fights easily, 1
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Submitted: 10/27/2013
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User avatar #1 - voltkills (10/27/2013) [+] (3 replies)
stickied by biot
i think some of these are actually pretty useful, with 75% levitation you could jump really high easily. with 1 second super strength youd win fights easily, 1 second is enough time to throw a punch...
User avatar #11 - Zekermei (10/28/2013) [+] (6 replies)
Acid Tears Force yourself to cry. Collect all your tears. Save them up. Throw them at your enemies.

Invisibility in the Dark Go stop drug deals in dark alleys? Go out in the woods and try and catch Big Foot? Etc?

Control Remote Control From the picture, i'm assuming this means you're able to move around a remote control without touching it, in which case, that means you never have to get up to get the remote control ever again.

Communicate with Fruit Become a produce farmer. Grow apples and **** . Talk with your fruit to make sure their health. Produce some of the best ******* produce ever. Make bank selling your produce.

Trash Detection If you're a dumpster diver, then this one isn't that bad.

75% Levitation Hey, you're still somewhat floating, right?

Summon a Lamp... Once There are several things that this could help in. You're stuck in a room with a grue? Summon a lamp. The world has become a dark void, where all previous things that used electricity don't work anymore, as well as all old light sources? Summon a lamp. Find your wife cheating on you? Summon a lamp and beat both of them to death.

Bullet Attraction Go to where war is happening. Go to the middle of the battlefield. Set up a bullet-proof dome around you. Activate your bullet attraction. Unless it's a passive ability, in which case you're going to die before you make it to the safety of the dome.

Read Your Own Mind **** if I know what's useful about this.

Instant Hairloss Maybe you need to change your appearance, and fast, for whatever reason. Maybe cops are chasing you. Maybe there are assassins trying to find and kill you. Maybe you're on the FBI's most wanted list.

Abnormal Armhair Growth Again, **** if I know.

Absorb Bad Luck Absorb all the worlds bad luck, from every single person. Become the hero of the world. You'll probably have to kill yourself to make sure your bad luck doesn't hurt anyone, but you'll be a ******* hero.
#16 - anonymous (10/28/2013) [-]
Invisible in the dark is pretty usefull, Plus having a lamp once would be nice.
User avatar #26 - theexo (10/28/2013) [-]
invisibility in the dark? **** join the army and become a specialist.
User avatar #4 - xsap (10/27/2013) [-]
1 sec super strength and invisible in the dark aren't that useless

it takes 1 sec to punch someone, punch their ******* head off
be an assassin that goes out in the dark
User avatar #33 - tabarzins (10/28/2013) [-]
1 second super strength is better than 0 second super strength.
User avatar #25 - adu (10/28/2013) [-]
Communicating with fruit is useful depending on how much the fruit actually knows...
#23 - rishnock (10/28/2013) [-]
One second super strength would be awesome. its all you need to punch someone to the moon.
User avatar #6 - scoggand (10/28/2013) [-]
75% will either make you lighter or allow you to hover and invisibility in the dark would be an amazing power especially if you're batman.
#3 - cptsparklez ONLINE (10/27/2013) [+] (1 reply)
id want levitation for Halloween pranks and the fact i wouldn't have to worry bout ice in winter
#37 - infinitereaper (10/28/2013) [-]
1 Second Super Strength would be great

You could like touch someone and have their heart explode outwardly while the blood splatters all over everyone in the vicinity.

The best part is you don't have to worry about hurting people since you can just turn it on when you need it.

75% levitation would decrease your weight and allow you to jump greater distances, and carry heavy things, very useful.

Invisibility in the dark would help you get away with any crime at night and help you in horror movie situations. Not as good, but good enough.
User avatar #36 - spasticpuppet (10/28/2013) [-]
1 second super strength can help you throw one hell of a punch :T
#35 - cobrien (10/28/2013) [+] (1 reply)
I found one flaw with the word "useless." I would summon the **** out of that lamp.
#34 - thatguyyoumightno (10/28/2013) [-]
Some of these would be AWESOME!
Bullet Attraction: hide in a metal box, go to war, all bullets go to you instead of the dudes your sided with. WIN ALL WARS
Acid Tears: Lean forward, gather tears in some kind of container.
Super slo-mo: work for scientists and help them discover how the body works by doing things in slow motion so they can see what happens to the body as you do it
1 Second super strength: no recharge time means you can just keep activating it over and over again to act like normal super strength. plus im pretty sure the whole downside to super strength is that you can't do normal tasks anymore cause your too strong. this would allow you to turn it off
75% levitation: you can now fall slower than normal. enjoy freaking people out as you jump off the empire state building and land on your feet
User avatar #32 - darman (10/28/2013) [-]
Seducing hats you say....
#31 - infernoimmortal ONLINE (10/28/2013) [-]
This sucks, all of these are useful one way or another, an useless superpower would be to have the ability to stop time for 0,4 nanoseconds every 150 years on a Friday at 3 AM.
User avatar #30 - arcticvenom (10/28/2013) [-]
User avatar #9 - xanderpetty (10/28/2013) [-]
With fruit communication you can place an apple to have it spy on people.
#8 - gryphemthegryphon ONLINE (10/28/2013) [-]
Bullet Attraction: Where bulletproof armor in a battlefield to provide a wider range of cover for allies using weapons that don't use bullets.
User avatar #7 - theincorrigibleone ONLINE (10/28/2013) [-]
Acid tears would be pretty sweet if you resist the acid personally.
1 sec. super strength (as was already pointed out by xsap) would still be ******* awesome.
Invisibility in the dark would still make you invisible to infrared and possibly night vision. I only say possibly because it depends on if "dark" in this sense is defined as what is dark to people or true darkness, and in true darkness, night vision would become useless.
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