Superpowers. . Taille USELESS SUPERPOWERS. i think some of these are actually pretty useful, with 75% levitation you could jump really high easily. with 1 second super strength youd win fights easily, 1
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Superpowers

Taille USELESS SUPERPOWERS
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Views: 9668
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Submitted: 10/27/2013
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User avatar #1 - voltkills (10/27/2013) [+] (3 replies)
stickied by biot
i think some of these are actually pretty useful, with 75% levitation you could jump really high easily. with 1 second super strength youd win fights easily, 1 second is enough time to throw a punch...
User avatar #11 - Zekermei (10/28/2013) [+] (6 replies)
Acid Tears Force yourself to cry. Collect all your tears. Save them up. Throw them at your enemies.

Invisibility in the Dark Go stop drug deals in dark alleys? Go out in the woods and try and catch Big Foot? Etc?

Control Remote Control From the picture, i'm assuming this means you're able to move around a remote control without touching it, in which case, that means you never have to get up to get the remote control ever again.

Communicate with Fruit Become a produce farmer. Grow apples and **** . Talk with your fruit to make sure their health. Produce some of the best ******* produce ever. Make bank selling your produce.

Trash Detection If you're a dumpster diver, then this one isn't that bad.

75% Levitation Hey, you're still somewhat floating, right?

Summon a Lamp... Once There are several things that this could help in. You're stuck in a room with a grue? Summon a lamp. The world has become a dark void, where all previous things that used electricity don't work anymore, as well as all old light sources? Summon a lamp. Find your wife cheating on you? Summon a lamp and beat both of them to death.

Bullet Attraction Go to where war is happening. Go to the middle of the battlefield. Set up a bullet-proof dome around you. Activate your bullet attraction. Unless it's a passive ability, in which case you're going to die before you make it to the safety of the dome.

Read Your Own Mind **** if I know what's useful about this.

Instant Hairloss Maybe you need to change your appearance, and fast, for whatever reason. Maybe cops are chasing you. Maybe there are assassins trying to find and kill you. Maybe you're on the FBI's most wanted list.

Abnormal Armhair Growth Again, **** if I know.

Absorb Bad Luck Absorb all the worlds bad luck, from every single person. Become the hero of the world. You'll probably have to kill yourself to make sure your bad luck doesn't hurt anyone, but you'll be a ******* hero.
User avatar #26 - theexo (10/28/2013) [-]
invisibility in the dark? **** join the army and become a specialist.
User avatar #4 - xsap (10/27/2013) [-]
1 sec super strength and invisible in the dark aren't that useless

it takes 1 sec to punch someone, punch their ******* head off
be an assassin that goes out in the dark
User avatar #33 - tabarzins (10/28/2013) [-]
1 second super strength is better than 0 second super strength.
User avatar #25 - adu (10/28/2013) [-]
Communicating with fruit is useful depending on how much the fruit actually knows...
#23 - rishnock (10/28/2013) [-]
One second super strength would be awesome. its all you need to punch someone to the moon.
User avatar #6 - scoggand (10/28/2013) [-]
75% will either make you lighter or allow you to hover and invisibility in the dark would be an amazing power especially if you're batman.
#3 - cptsparklez (10/27/2013) [+] (1 reply)
id want levitation for Halloween pranks and the fact i wouldn't have to worry bout ice in winter
User avatar #36 - spasticpuppet (10/28/2013) [-]
1 second super strength can help you throw one hell of a punch :T
#35 - cobrien (10/28/2013) [+] (1 reply)
I found one flaw with the word "useless." I would summon the **** out of that lamp.
#34 - thatguyyoumightno (10/28/2013) [-]
Some of these would be AWESOME!
Bullet Attraction: hide in a metal box, go to war, all bullets go to you instead of the dudes your sided with. WIN ALL WARS
Acid Tears: Lean forward, gather tears in some kind of container.
Super slo-mo: work for scientists and help them discover how the body works by doing things in slow motion so they can see what happens to the body as you do it
1 Second super strength: no recharge time means you can just keep activating it over and over again to act like normal super strength. plus im pretty sure the whole downside to super strength is that you can't do normal tasks anymore cause your too strong. this would allow you to turn it off
75% levitation: you can now fall slower than normal. enjoy freaking people out as you jump off the empire state building and land on your feet
#31 - infernoimmortal (10/28/2013) [-]
This sucks, all of these are useful one way or another, an useless superpower would be to have the ability to stop time for 0,4 nanoseconds every 150 years on a Friday at 3 AM.
User avatar #30 - arcticvenom (10/28/2013) [-]
Revive bugs, BRING BACK THE PREHISTORIC MEGA DRAGONFLY'S AND RULE THE WOOOOOOOORRLLLLDD!
User avatar #29 - thephoenix (10/28/2013) [-]
pretty sure number two and three would be extremely useful, especially invisible in the dark, raping would be so much more efficient and easy!
#28 - Snowplows (10/28/2013) [-]
Seduce... HATS?
Seduce... HATS?
User avatar #20 - icameheretotroll (10/28/2013) [+] (1 reply)
1) acid tears are ******* horrible I agree
2) hijack the power, sneak in anywhere, night vision goggles can't see you
3) hijack the remote control, buy a toy remote controlled robot, make it control the robot
4) leave fruit in room, ask fruit what happened in room free hidden video cameras
5) go to junkyard, whatever you don't detect is not trash therefore useful
6) Become a ******* ninja since you can jump twice as better
7) Ok this is useless
8) have bulletproof shield, become master to take down terrorists with guns aimed at civilians
9) Reading your own mind would cause that high pitched sound to start bumping in your head, which is a mobile mute button for you cause you won't be able to hear anything else
10) This is completely useless as well
11) become wolverine
12) Cure other people's bad luck by making yours even worse, become a true hero
13) Jump off building, slow down, end up unhurt
14) Revive fossils of giant enormous bugs, awesome
15) Best way to suicide, get a chair, sit in front of a mirror and watch yourself age
16) Become a doctor
17) Punch someone while using the super strength, their face will turn into mush
18) You get to be a laptop, come on this is awesome
19) seduce fedoras, tell them to raid all the alpha males, get all the bitches
20) Say you are god of art and you absorb it through your skin, desaturate stuff and be worshipped
User avatar #19 - jacencaedus (10/28/2013) [-]
This just described half of Haven
#18 - emilovitch (10/28/2013) [-]
Read your own mind? Access to any information ever absorbed in your mind one way or another. Anything you have learned or seen that has been layered somewhere in your brain where you wouldn't be able to reach it is suddenly wide open for you to use in any way you like.

That would be pretty sweet if you ask me...
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