Son, your new tutor is here!. . Son your new tutor is here!
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#99 - aklex
Reply +119 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [+] (21 replies)
stickied by assjaw
Source Une famille bien allumée - Une après-midi très chaude
#189 to #99 - anon id: 5053a7f4
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Jesus, what's the woman's name!?!?
User avatar #202 to #99 - technobanana
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Being english I have no idea what the **** was said
#256 to #99 - anon id: 0e3e8526
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
inb4 baguette jokes
User avatar #142 to #99 - timelordjam
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
can anyone translate the end please?
User avatar #186 to #142 - chupiter
Reply +17 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
- So.. Do you like the new baguette flavours?
- Yes I do. But anyway, do you want to go see the Eiffel tower?
- Sure thing, comrade. I'm just going to grab my striped sweater.
#259 to #186 - anon id: 0e3e8526
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Well, at least you didn't make surrender jokes
User avatar #261 to #259 - chupiter
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I was going to, but I thought it would be to obvious.
#270 to #261 - anon id: 0e3e8526
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
More like it's an inaccurate maymay popularized by people who don't know **** about history
#156 to #142 - drunkdentist
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
- I kept putting the heating up, she was taking off all hers clothes. It was awesome. So hot!
- Wow! Respect. So your new app undresses women, right?
- No it's an app to set the heating at home. And I used it to undress he.r

#262 to #156 - anon id: 0e3e8526
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
With Wiser, using your heating has never been so easy.
User avatar #169 to #99 - edraham
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
xD même la vf passe bizarrement !
User avatar #163 to #99 - sonnyboii
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
It actually kinda hurts when i've had french for 3 years and i understood one word
User avatar #167 to #163 - studsper
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I had french for 6 years, and understood like 5 words.
User avatar #168 to #167 - sonnyboii
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
It feels good when other people knows the same feel
User avatar #198 to #168 - nandaaz
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I don't know that feel.... had french for 2 years, dropped it ASAP cuz i hated it, and for some reason I understood more than 10 words
#258 to #198 - anon id: 0e3e8526
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Well, it's quite a sophisticated and tricky language
Being french is a huge advantage since English is so easy to learn
User avatar #199 to #198 - sonnyboii
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Good for you, i cant drop it
#257 to #167 - anon id: 0e3e8526
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Well, the kid uses some slang
Like "meuf", pronounced like "muff" in english, which is "femme" ("fahm") reversed, meaning "woman"
User avatar #286 to #163 - thesinful
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(02/22/2014) [-]
I had French for an hour and I didn't understand a damn thing.
In college, I accidentally signed up for a class for people who've had 5 years of French instead of one for people who never took French.
I managed to say, "My name is thesinful and I'm from Apple Orchard" in French. Then switched to English for, "And I'm in the wrong damn class apparently."
#249 to #163 - anon id: e796bed5
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Been in french since I was like 5 and I don't know one word they said
User avatar #204 to #163 - matriculator
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
French is my first language, although I understand a good chunk of it and it's little undecipherable.
#9 - babyweewee
Reply +542 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
#228 to #9 - walkerjam
Reply +46 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Paint Skills off the chaaarrts
User avatar #245 to #228 - Pompano
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Why doesn't this have more thumbs?
#266 to #245 - godlessgod
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #5 - afrodemon
Reply +324 123456789123345869
(01/29/2014) [-]
jesus ******* christ, no wonder she was sweaty when she wore that much clothing
#210 to #5 - tyraxio
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
wat.

A tank top, a jumper, a cardigan and a scarf? Is that a lot of clothing? I am confused.
#217 to #210 - anon id: 9a11e68d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Well, for being in a heated house it is.
#218 to #217 - tyraxio
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Maybe. Tbh, I don't think it was heated a lot until he started using that app.
#1 - fezzo
Reply +195 123456789123345869
(01/29/2014) [-]
I gotta get myself an Ipad
User avatar #180 to #1 - jokersaysamuseme
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
No.
#140 to #1 - meter
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
plz no   
   
 it was an Android, get that, that's better    
   
 good boy
plz no

it was an Android, get that, that's better

good boy
#159 - redragond
Reply +169 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
User avatar #6 - thisbepi
Reply +13 123456789123345869
(01/29/2014) [-]
i dont get it
User avatar #39 to #6 - inserttexthere
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
the temperature is in Celsius my fellow american
#7 to #6 - chords
Reply +143 123456789123345869
(01/29/2014) [-]
hes controlling the temp with his ipad so his tutor will strip down more
User avatar #221 to #7 - elmarcocfc
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Oh I see. I thought he had it down there to cover up him trying to contact his dick with his finger.
User avatar #15 to #7 - theirishalbino
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I must say this is advertisement at its best.
User avatar #14 to #7 - kinggrantb
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
What does the eye thing mean?
#93 to #14 - crackedpepper
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Its a thing you can use when replying, its a spoiler tag, so unless you mouse over it you dont see anything, its to avoid spoiling endings of shows or plot and such, but mostly for making jokes and stuff
User avatar #137 to #93 - sexymossantamby
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I may be the 1% of funnyjunk here. but how does someone make a spoiler tag for his or her comment?
User avatar #143 to #137 - zaach
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
When you're writing your comment, its in the top right. Just click the eye and write inbetween the spoiler tags.
User avatar #145 to #143 - sexymossantamby
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
oh wow im dumb thank you
User avatar #242 to #14 - thorstoned
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I don't mean to be roude or anything, but you did not know this after having a fj account for bout 4 years?
#241 to #14 - thorstoned
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#129 to #14 - anon id: e8ba6664
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
nice troll
User avatar #2 - sinery
Reply +121 123456789123345869
(01/29/2014) [-]
I thought she was going to have a penis.
I don't know why.
User avatar #181 to #2 - jokersaysamuseme
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Your blue name explains it
#102 to #2 - neschapretoe
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Because you have been on the internet long enough to know its too good to be true.
User avatar #11 to #2 - Einsty
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Too much internet exposure. Can't be cured and it's terminate.
#25 to #2 - hates
Reply +17 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
That's still be hot for me
User avatar #28 to #25 - pootismang
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
All aboard the dickchick bandwagon.
User avatar #35 to #28 - hates
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Here, I just made this gallery, for you. It's most of my collection of shemale images ( I might've missed a few pics though. Also, I like how I happen to have exactly 69 shemale pics)

imgur.com/a/1I6gR
User avatar #240 to #35 - tomorrowsnightmare
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Is that GoFudgeyourselff girl still on here?
User avatar #188 to #35 - savvasp
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
These make me question my sexuality
#46 to #35 - hjklasdf
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I like thank your for sharing that.
User avatar #50 to #46 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
You're welcome, I have a ton of pics. I especially try to save shemale ones, and you might've noticed in the gallery I have a lot of celeb fakes, since it's easier to find fakes of your favorite celebrity, instead of looking for the best pics of random girls.
#52 to #50 - hjklasdf
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
And you lied it is 68 pics. Not that I am complaining.
User avatar #53 to #52 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
It said 69 when I was uploading them, apparently one image didn't upload all the way (no idea which one)
#55 to #53 - hjklasdf
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Still more in one place than I have ever found before.
User avatar #61 to #55 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I also have a total of ~2,600 celeb fakes (2,606 exactly, but I know I saved a few images twice on accident)
#64 to #61 - hjklasdf
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Well was not expecting that amount.
User avatar #65 to #64 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Hey, you know what they say, go pro or go home. I have to save all of the pics
#67 to #65 - hjklasdf
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Agreed I only have close to 250ish haven't counted lately.
User avatar #69 to #67 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I didn't count, I just right clicked on my "celebs" folder and viewed the properties. In total, I have 3,911 porn pics. I'm surprised by how much of that is taken up by celebs, though.
#72 to #69 - hjklasdf
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Mine are just thrown into a random folder I just estimated the amount I have.
User avatar #73 to #72 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Mine are always in a folder marked "misc" (for the last few years, so "misc" has become synonymous for "porn" for me) and I try to organize it somewhat.
#76 to #73 - hjklasdf
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Makes sense and I should organize mine since I have random pics that I give to people in the same folder. That would be one bad situation if I clicked on some pics I have.
User avatar #77 to #76 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I have some folders in my misc folder, them being: Best, Caroline Moseley, Cartoon, Celeb, Jane Doe, and Rule 34. I have a million pics in the "best" one (it was originally meant for the select few pics that were really good) and then there's a ton of pics that are just loose in the misc folder. And my rule 34 one is for the most... interesting... of rule 34 pics (there's a cartoon rock with a dick, a powerglove on someone's dick, and someone ******* ET, for example)
User avatar #84 to #77 - powerglove
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
i have that powerglove picture too. i love you and it.
User avatar #87 to #84 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I love finding the weirdest Rule 34 pics. I also have a woman with giant googly eyes over her eyes, giving a blowjob while shaking her head
User avatar #173 to #87 - hudis
0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I need to see this.
#78 to #77 - hjklasdf
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Well it is technically rule 34 I have yet to find holocaust porn to prove to someone that it does exist.
User avatar #81 to #78 - hates
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I have one pic of Anne Frank and her sister, but while I was looking for holocaust porn just now, I found out that my pic is just one panel from a comic (I probably shouldn't upload it since it's technically ***************)

Here's the link to the full comic, though:
You need to login to view this link
#85 to #81 - hjklasdf
0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Well thank you that ends that journey. I actually think rule 34 is right.
User avatar #83 to #81 - hates
0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Also, apparently people photoshopped Anne Frank's head onto nudes... Not even people who have been dead for 70 years are safe from Rule 34
User avatar #88 to #46 - hates
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
(Hit the reply limit)
Also, one of my friends pointed out that there's one thing we have yet to find r34 for: ceiling fans
User avatar #157 to #88 - tornadomad
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
you wanna bet?
User avatar #40 to #25 - demigodofmadness
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Serious questions, no offense meant by any of these and I'm not judging you.

a) If you took a girl home and she turned out to be a shemale would you be pleasantly surprised?
b) Would you not even take a girl home, would you specifically look for a shemale?

I have to say, never been a big fan of guy/girl, so if I'm looking at hentai and someone has to get rammed with a dick, I would prefer the person with the dick to have nice tits, a clean shaven body and a pretty face, but I'd really just prefer a strap-on.
User avatar #48 to #40 - hates
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Also, you don't have to worry, I'm a laid back person, so it'd take a lot to actually make me mad/insulted. I used to be a brony (USED TO) so I've gotten used to being hated/insulted.
User avatar #54 to #48 - demigodofmadness
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
It's not about being hated, I just wanted to make sure I'm not judging you. I've got my flaws I've been made fun of for and that doesn't bother me. It's being judged that's always bothered me.
User avatar #57 to #54 - hates
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
No, I don't care if you judge me, I just tell myself that everyone has some weird interest. But I'm mainly ok with all this since I'm mostly anonymous. I'd never tell my friends/family that I like shemales (or my other fetishes...)
User avatar #59 to #57 - demigodofmadness
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
It's true, I have a foot fetish. I've only told one friend, so I could get it off my chest. But in your case I'm guessing you've ruled out a long term relationship with a shemale?
User avatar #63 to #59 - hates
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I'm a huge introvert who spends most of my time on the computer, and I'm horrible at holding conversations. I'm somewhat lucky if I have relationships...

But I definitely would like a relationship with a shemale, but I'd probably prefer a regular, vagina-equipped girl for a long-term relationship.
User avatar #66 to #63 - demigodofmadness
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I used to be pretty introverted too, I still am really. But out of all my friends in engineering I'm the most outgoing person. If you still need help breaking out of your shell, I propose finding a job and becoming friends with your co-workers. That helped me. It helps to be put in situations that remind you others care just as much about your opinion as you do theirs.
User avatar #71 to #66 - hates
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I work at a coffee shop (I've had the job for about 9 months now) and it's helped my be more social. The thing is that it's easier for me to talk to strangers, since I won't see them again anytime soon, so I don't have to worry about sounding like an idiot or anything. It really helped that my first actual friends were when I was in college for the past 2 years, but one of them thought that pretty much everything I said was borderline retarded. (To be fair, I would sometimes say stupid stuff sarcastically, but I give no hint that I'm being sarcastic. Still, it didn't help my self-esteem when talking to friends.)
User avatar #74 to #71 - demigodofmadness
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
That will help. I was at a sandwich shop for 2 years before I quit. Hearing strangers embarrass themselves when ordering really helped. It used to be that I was really shy around people at first and then I warmed up to them and just said every thought that popped into my head. Most of the things I said were stupid, but every once in a while I would get a good laugh out of someone. Helped me to distinguish what was funny and what wasn't.

I used jokes so much until they stopped being funny so often that one of my friends would say, "you killed it Nick, you killed it." whenever I did that. Embarrassing and helpful.

It's been nice talking to you, time for me to go to sleep now though. Later.
User avatar #79 to #74 - hates
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Aw, good night, sir. And I also have the problem of using the same jokes and chat topics over and over, since I can't think of a whole lot of things to say in conversations. That's why I prefer to talk to people via texting, or talking to them online, so I can take my time to think of what to say without having awkward pauses.
User avatar #45 to #40 - hates
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
a) I'd probably rate a shemale as the same as a regular girl, I guess. It depends on my mood, so if a regular girl is a 5, then a shemale is a 5-6 for me.

b) Like I said, I like both equally, but her being a shemale would be a pleasant surprise.

I'm sure that the fact that I'm bi (but leaning more towards girls than guys) is a big factor in this. But I'd prefer a shemale at least 5 times more than I'd like just a guy. And strap-ons would be nice, but I'd just prefer a real dick.
#113 to #45 - dandyhandycandy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
It doesn't having anything to do with being bi, apparently gay men usually aren't attracted to transgenders since they are specifically targeted at straight men, they have all the facets of a female minus the Vagina, You being Bi just means you don't mind Anal Penetration, I'm straight but I'd totes **** a trans in da booty.
#33 - learmy
Reply -52 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I'd push her to my bed and **** her hard.
User avatar #114 to #33 - SwirlSkull
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
you may want to put your fredora on the night stand honey you might dent it
#96 to #33 - stealingbikes
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
User avatar #149 to #33 - techjoker
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
What's your point?
User avatar #155 to #33 - kolsinder
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
But I don't know what you mean...
User avatar #172 to #33 - garymotherfingoak
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
you're not **********
neither is golliath
#196 to #33 - niggernazi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
you are one of the biggest heroes on funnyjunk
#224 to #33 - padorak
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
this is suspicious
#230 to #33 - greensky
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I love comments like that I dunno why they're getting thumbed down but I tell you this, keep it up.
#34 to #33 - baconbiscuits
Reply +49 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
What? How can you use that meme with that statement. Something like "Next lesson: Anatomy." would have been acceptable.
#121 to #34 - jayenoh
Reply -4 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I feel like people are too quick to jump on the misuse of that maymay. Just like any other stupid thing from 2 or so years ago, the proper use of this is ******* cancerous. This wasn't particularly artful, but it has potential. In summation, irony may be the only thing that could make that image relevant once more, and you're stifling it. Please don't
#42 to #34 - golliath
Reply -34 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I do what I want.
#43 to #42 - baconbiscuits
Reply +89 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
So do the mentally challenged.
User avatar #44 to #43 - golliath
Reply -31 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
But that worked? I mean I do what I want... IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. Jerk
#47 to #44 - baconbiscuits
Reply +17 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #115 to #47 - edwardyeap
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
You could've noticed how try-hard these users are.
#49 to #47 - golliath
Reply -25 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
User avatar #187 to #49 - carnivoreapples
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
FJ doesn't seem to like you very much.
maybe you should leave.
User avatar #279 to #187 - golliath
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/31/2014) [-]
I'll take my red thumbs like a man. I'll stick around no matter what gets thrown at me.
User avatar #280 to #279 - carnivoreapples
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(02/01/2014) [-]
but what if i throw poop

i mean, it smells a lot
you probably won't like it
User avatar #281 to #280 - golliath
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(02/01/2014) [-]
I'LL STILL TAKE IT LIKE A MAN DAMN IT!
User avatar #282 to #281 - carnivoreapples
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(02/01/2014) [-]
hmm

but what if the poop is green
User avatar #283 to #282 - golliath
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(02/01/2014) [-]
I'LL ******* TAKE.... Actually that's kinda gross. Nah maybe.. NO I'LL TAKE IT LIKE A MAN DAMN IT.
User avatar #284 to #283 - carnivoreapples
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(02/01/2014) [-]
that's the right mentality.
here, have my thumb.

be sure to keep it nice and warm inside your ass though, else it might break or something

also, the thumb is green for a reason
User avatar #285 to #284 - golliath
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(02/01/2014) [-]
Thank you. I think you're the second person that has thumbed me up with these comments.
User avatar #51 to #44 - scoobi
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
you seem new here
#56 to #51 - golliath
Reply -20 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
And apparently no one can take a joke around here.
User avatar #58 to #56 - scoobi
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Not a funny joke
#60 to #58 - golliath
Reply -17 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
#62 to #60 - golliath
Reply -16 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
And here's a cat to maybe cheer you up from your mood.
And here's a cat to maybe cheer you up from your mood.
User avatar #86 to #56 - higaphix
Reply -13 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
I like your arrogant sense of humor, mine is the same way
**** yeah man
User avatar #278 to #86 - golliath
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/31/2014) [-]
Thanks man guess funnyjunk just doesn't like it too much. Whatever though.
#21 - supercookieduster
Reply +75 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
#95 - badboywantsu
Reply +72 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Only problem i see with this is the dad bursting in yelling "who touched the thermostat?"
#216 to #95 - nthmetal
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#101 to #95 - deadbyapril
Reply +35 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Who touched the thermostat?!
#110 to #101 - screencleaner
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Gif version
Gif version
User avatar #138 to #110 - frutus
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
But it's not the same version of the episode... PHONY
User avatar #267 to #110 - birdlaw **User deleted account**
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
Jewish Peter?
#128 to #110 - anon id: 708df657
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
this gif is from the first season ever made before it got cancelled. (the pilot i believe)
the picture is from a remake of the same episode.
User avatar #131 to #128 - screencleaner
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/30/2014) [-]
That's true