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70 comments displayed.
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+116
#2 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Awesome! So how do you turn the kid blue? I've always wanted a blue child.
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+1
#100 to #2 - markisundercontrol (08/07/2015) [-]
**markisundercontrol used "*roll picture*"**
**markisundercontrol rolled image**just have a child, I'm sure it will be blue for the rest of it's life if you are its parent. or any other color
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+2
User avatar #20 to #2 - xxReaper (08/06/2015) [-]
You get a vasectomy apparently.
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+4
#21 to #20 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Huh. What about a ying yang colored one? 69 a black girl?
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+4
User avatar #83 to #2 - empithree (08/07/2015) [-]
I'M BLUE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
DABADEE DABADIE DABADEE DABADIE
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+3
#16 to #2 - anon (08/06/2015) [-]
Okay, first you save before birth, then you go and fight those rock dudes and note down the time your fight took, then go and do the birth thing and see what color the baby is, if it isn't the color you want, you need to reload your save and repeat the fight but this time make the fight last another minute or two, keep doing this until the kid is blue, personally I like orange but blue is cool too.
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0
#19 to #16 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Sooo...pull the baby out and put it back in?
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#26 to #19 - anon (08/06/2015) [-]
Paper mario thousand year door joke, you hatch a yoshi in it, the color of the yoshi is based on how long it took you to hatch him.
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+1
#27 to #26 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Nice.
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+6
User avatar #24 to #2 - oldmanmagee (08/06/2015) [-]
I'm blue dabadee dabadie...
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+42
#25 to #24 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Here, have something relevant.
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+31
#3 to #2 - anon (08/06/2015) [-]
You choke it to death.
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+45
#4 to #3 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Instructions unclear. Kid turned orange.
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+40
#5 to #4 - anon (08/06/2015) [-]
CHOKE, not STOKE.
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+22
#6 to #5 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Oops. Here's another question. Where is the best place to hide a small body?
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+4
User avatar #7 to #6 - metalheadtildeath (08/06/2015) [-]
thank you for that wonderful journey
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+3
#8 to #7 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Sure man. Tomorrow we can paint old people faces at nursing homes. It's gonna be great!
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+4
User avatar #9 to #8 - metalheadtildeath (08/06/2015) [-]
sounds like a plan! i'll bring lube, some duct tape, and a grim reaper costume.
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+3
#10 to #9 - lunacyexport (08/06/2015) [-]
Awesome. I'll bring fruit snacks and juice boxes! We'll make a picnic out of it!
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+2
User avatar #11 to #10 - metalheadtildeath (08/06/2015) [-]
mmm tasty!
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+229
#22 to #1 - assassindash (08/06/2015) [-]
it's so nice they taught their kid to play the piano.

ORIGINAL JOKE EVERYBODY!
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+82
#23 to #22 - norwegiansnowman (08/06/2015) [-]
I for one salute you for that, I miss nignog jokes on fj.
Miss the times when everybody could handle the edgy ****** jokes.
Now everybody thumbs you down to oblivion
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+55
User avatar #29 to #23 - thejjmax (08/06/2015) [-]
Nig jokes are almost always thumbed up still, just more people complain about it.
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+7
#46 to #29 - anon (08/07/2015) [-]
how is it a nig joke?

No one ever said the baby refused to get a job.
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+1
User avatar #34 to #29 - lvlonemeepo (08/06/2015) [-]
What a bunch of wieneys if you ask me
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+1
User avatar #43 to #29 - KillinTime (08/07/2015) [-]
dass ok if you see someone complaining about nignog jokes you can just block their ass, no more downvotes no more people bitching about how it's offensive win/win 2 birds and a stone.
-3
#38 to #29 - norwegiansnowman has deleted their comment [-]
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User avatar #108 to #23 - alekshm (08/14/2015) [-]
I agree with you, norwegiansnowman
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0
#107 to #23 - anon (08/14/2015) [-]
Yes it really is a shame that people sometimes react negatively to racism.
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User avatar #93 to #23 - thinemother (08/07/2015) [-]
wot u on about m8, there's a nig nog joke in every content that contains a hint of a primate.
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#87 to #23 - anon (08/07/2015) [-]
the thing is this one was actually clever
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User avatar #85 to #23 - henrycolt (08/07/2015) [-]
175 green thumbs and counting. You miss the times of what, ***** ?
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+1
#47 to #22 - thehistorylover (08/07/2015) [-]
**thehistorylover used "*roll picture*"**
**thehistorylover rolled image**... I am quite fond of that youtuber guy.
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+58
#12 - cursedfool (08/06/2015) [-]
"It has to be yours, you're the only one, I swear!"

strange how nature do dat
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+7
User avatar #33 to #12 - zorach (08/06/2015) [-]
Is that a black eye?
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+177
User avatar #35 to #33 - Infernal (08/06/2015) [-]
No, the whole baby is black.
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+54
#37 to #35 - guto (08/07/2015) [-]
10/10
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0
#99 to #35 - markisundercontrol (08/07/2015) [-]
**markisundercontrol used "*roll picture*"**
**markisundercontrol rolled image** top cake
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+34
#31 - alyssryuzaki (08/06/2015) [-]
Oh jesus, that's terrible
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+51
#14 - rollingpicture (08/06/2015) [-]
**rollingpicture used "*roll picture*"**
**rollingpicture rolled image**

And thats how the hulk was born
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0
#105 to #14 - anon (08/09/2015) [-]
That lady was probably doing it as a joke or some stupid ass protest.
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+11
#41 - carlsaganrealness ONLINE (08/07/2015) [-]
When your co worker just discovers the fact that she's 12 weeks pregnant
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+8
User avatar #45 - mendelevium (08/07/2015) [-]
"I'd like mine in blue please"
I tell the doctor mid-snip
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+16
#40 - missoracle (08/07/2015) [-]
**missoracle used "*roll picture*"**
**missoracle rolled image** The real dad of the baby is this guy.
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+1
User avatar #15 - theplanetearth (08/06/2015) [-]
**** cucks.
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+20
User avatar #17 to #15 - mrjunebug (08/06/2015) [-]
I don't get how the word "cuck" is being thrown around in every scenario where someone cheats. That's not what a cuck is, at least not in this scenario.
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+3
#52 to #17 - anon (08/07/2015) [-]
I think its more closer to the biology term for cuckold raising a child that isnt your own
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+1
#53 to #17 - anon (08/07/2015) [-]
The cuckoo bird tricks other birds into raising its children. That's what the term came from, it fits this like a glove.
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-7
User avatar #18 to #17 - theplanetearth (08/06/2015) [-]
It's mostly because of the gullibility.
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+4
User avatar #30 to #18 - heartlessrobot (08/06/2015) [-]
Or because sarcasm doesn't translate well over the internet.
I'm sure they didn't check facebook for "Sam Delanche is now single "
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+3
User avatar #42 to #18 - brothergrimm (08/07/2015) [-]
Define the original meaning of "cuck" and use it properly or shut your ******* gob.......
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+5
#32 - anon (08/06/2015) [-]
disgusting.
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+5
#65 - harrypottergirl (08/07/2015) [-]
**harrypottergirl used "*roll picture*"**
**harrypottergirl rolled image** what my baby looks like
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0
User avatar #68 to #65 - unbelievable (08/07/2015) [-]
We found phanact's mom...
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0
User avatar #73 to #68 - harrypottergirl (08/07/2015) [-]
**** i thought i could keep my secret. welp it looks like the cats out of the bag now
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0
#95 to #73 - jumperzero (08/07/2015) [-]
box*
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+5
#28 - messier (08/06/2015) [-]
**messier used "*roll picture*"**
**messier rolled image** danm
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+4
#13 - Kairyuka (08/06/2015) [-]
At first I thought it was some kinda pun on getting a blue kid
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+1
#88 - summin (08/07/2015) [-]
Welcome to da club, booooooooi!
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-1
#98 - sirleeroy (08/07/2015) [-]
**sirleeroy used "*roll picture*"**
**sirleeroy rolled image**
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0
User avatar #96 - Garblestickleshlop (08/07/2015) [-]
My uncle's vasectomy repaired itself. When you get a vasectomy, at least certain kinds, you have to go for a follow up and ejaculate into a cup to make sure everything worked right. He never went to that so we don't know if it was successful or if his tubes grew to allow sperm through, which does happen sometimes. Anyways, my aunt got pregnant and it was this big blow up thing which almost caused a divorce but he got a sperm count done which proved that he could still impregnate. My cousin is his spitting image now which is hilarious because he was once suspected as the product of infidelity.
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-2
#91 - deported (08/07/2015) [-]
**deported used "*roll picture*"**
**deported rolled image**
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