Red Lobsterfest. That black girl from the drunk sex scene in beerfest was sexy as . ICOULDN' T HAVE DAD. PLEASE. u/ HY, DAD? mu CAN' T KEEP Seeu. AN so RIGHT TH lobsters Jesus Sausage gawd red
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Red Lobsterfest

That black girl from the drunk sex scene in beerfest was sexy as ****

ICOULDN' T HAVE
DAD. PLEASE. u/ HY, DAD?
mu CAN' T KEEP Seeu. AN
so RIGHT THERE N SHELFISH ARE ?
LEVITICUS!
YOURSELF. “ME” AND AN
HAPPY' DAR. cnn
...
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Views: 18841
Favorited: 19
Submitted: 03/27/2014
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User avatar #5 - obsidicus (03/28/2014) [+] (12 replies)
"And he [Jesus] said to them, “Then are you also without understanding? Do you not see that whatever goes into a person from outside cannot defile him, since it enters not his heart but his stomach, and is expelled?”(Thus he declared all foods clean.)" Mark 7:19
#8 - pizzaweed (03/28/2014) [-]
The face of a man who tried to **** a lobster
User avatar #2 - halotalim (03/27/2014) [+] (3 replies)
Jesus touched the dead and lepers, both were consideredc unclean. He even said "Its not what you touch that makes you clean or not, but whatb ids in your heart."
User avatar #9 - brokentrucker (03/28/2014) [+] (4 replies)
So I heard somewhere that lobsters are immortal.

I have not done further research, just some dude talking about "They can't die of old age"

I thought it was pretty neat.
User avatar #11 to #9 - mrgoodlove (03/28/2014) [-]
It's true, they don't die naturally, they just get bigger. My friend and I have this theory that deep in the sea there are giant lobsters waiting for their day to strike.
#1 - vitunhenkka (03/27/2014) [+] (2 replies)
**vitunhenkka rolled a random image posted in comment #1033478 at Friendly **why he hates shellfish so much
**vitunhenkka rolled a random image posted in comment #1033478 at Friendly **why he hates shellfish so much
#32 - jiggyoog (03/28/2014) [-]
living lobsters are blue.....
cooked lobsters turn red
User avatar #22 - muffintime (03/28/2014) [-]
Gods just being shellfish...
#33 - bulanu (03/28/2014) [-]
**bulanu rolled image**
#26 - kez (03/28/2014) [+] (6 replies)
Can anyone explain to me the bit where Jesus has just been put on the cross?

God gets angry and a storm starts to happen / clouds but then Jesus says to god its all ok and its not their fault and then Gods like ok, I understand.

God is Jesus yeah? So is he talking to himself? and why?

How can God be reasoned with? Hes all knowing. He knew he would be persuaded before it happened.

Thats the bit I read when I was about 5 that made me not believe in God. Can anyone explain it to me? Genuinely curious
User avatar #27 to #26 - douevensax (03/28/2014) [-]
All depends on the church.

I'm a mormon, so I believe God and Jesus are seperate.

Jesus says to God that the Romans know not what they do, which is true to some extent, but you can't really NOT blame them for killing him. Jesus did nothing but help, and they killed him. The Roman king (or whatever his title was) was persuaded by the people to kill him.

With this kind of disrespect and blaspheme, it was needed to show that what they did was very wrong.

At least that's what I remember, been a while since I fully studied that part.

Anyways, shouldn't you try reading again, since 5-year-olds tend to miss some things, and I don't really trust what I remember from more than 10 years ago.
User avatar #36 - trojanmannn (03/28/2014) [-]
>Leviticus
>Christianity
>Trying to greentext on FJ
User avatar #34 - mrselfdestruct (03/28/2014) [-]
well, the laws of leviticus were written by the leaders of the levite tribe. which is why we christians consider it irrelevant.
the "no shellfish/no pork" thing is likely due to sanitary reasons.

shellfish are bottom feeders, so the jews considered them unclean. and also fatal to eat come red tide season.

pigs were considered unclean because they rolled around in mud a lot. and eating pork that wasn't cooked well does lead to tapeworms.

TL;DR those laws were more of a health code than a divine code
#20 - anonymous (03/28/2014) [-]
bible camp ^
v
User avatar #7 - mechanichore (03/28/2014) [-]
The comment is seriously ******* no dude.
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