Not prepared for battle. via @CrackedSorcerer Cartoon: Don't always fits www.crackedsorcerer.com/post/1728/Not-a-Real-Surgeon-Simulator. 101 likes Some men will funny
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[ 85 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
#2 - sinery
Reply -39 123456789123345869
(09/02/2014) [-]
But guess what?   
Your below mediocre chain mail won't protect you from my trusty thrust!
But guess what?
Your below mediocre chain mail won't protect you from my trusty thrust!
#4 to #2 - anon id: 6c4a4722
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/02/2014) [-]
He's saving up for plate.
#25 to #2 - anon id: 453769ab
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Why....Why did this get so many down votes? It was a joke... D:
#26 to #25 - sinery
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
I have no idea.
I have no idea.
#40 to #2 - captainp
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
longsword > katana
also chainmail > katana

www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kHs0tXeq9Y
#41 to #40 - sinery
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Read my comments.
User avatar #8 to #2 - poetsofthefall
Reply +133 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
If you're using that katana it is.
User avatar #9 to #8 - sinery
Reply +18 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Katanas aren't made for thrusting and does so poorly though.
User avatar #27 to #9 - garin
Reply -11 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Not true dude, versatile weapon, they have a curvy pointy bit on the end specifically for catching guts and pulling them out after stabby stabby goodness. Have a thumb anyway Mr Sinery
User avatar #29 to #27 - sinery
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Yeah, yeah, but they're not optimized to do so.
User avatar #63 to #29 - pillowmeister
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
he should've downloaded an AMD optimizer.
User avatar #64 to #63 - sinery
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Sounds cancerous.
User avatar #66 to #64 - pillowmeister
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
nvidia optimizer then?
User avatar #67 to #66 - sinery
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
A cancer that kills you slightly less painfully.
User avatar #70 to #67 - pillowmeister
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
uh.....
**** i dunno, Pentium 3 optimizer?
User avatar #71 to #70 - sinery
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Sounds like a self pleasuring device.
User avatar #72 to #71 - pillowmeister
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
abacus lubricant
User avatar #30 to #29 - garin
Reply -10 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
It would be a pointless weapon if it was optimised to do anything. That is the beauty of a katana, smash through armour, cut through muscle and fat, poke a hole in the plates, deflect cuts etc not they are not the best at anything but they are pretty good at everything. I have a hard on for weaponry, but I am no expert at all haha
#33 to #30 - sinery
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Katanas are agile, not versatile.
They are light, thin, and sharp - ideal vs unarmoured opponents.

But they won't be much damaging to someone in full chain mail or heavier, unless you get a thrust that breaks through a ring / the plate.
A longsword is heavier and have it's weight and point centered which brings a much deadlier thrust.
Also, the light wight of a katana is easily absorbed, where the sheer weight of a longsword will be much more damaging.

Moreover, katanas break easily and they lose their cutting edge very quickly, which means that after a battle the katana won't be worth many damns - where a good longsword just needs a sharpening stone and then is good to go.

TL;DR: Katanas are for spoiled cunts.
User avatar #35 to #33 - garin
Reply -8 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Damn man, chill your beans, I ain't looking for an argument, just passing on information. First off, have you seen a battlefield Samurai Armour? not exactly a linen cloth. I am not competing different fighting styles. Sure a Viking could smash through a chest plate with an axe, an English Halberd could smash through the hardest helmets etc I am just saying that the katana is a multi-purpose weapon.

They didn't need shields because the sword was one. You never meet a weapon head on with a katana because it would break, you deflect with it.

I am not going to carry this on buddy, I was just trying to spread some knowledge, sorry to get you all riled up.
#50 to #35 - wwhhaaq
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
>gets BTFO
>"lol wow chill man no need to get mad xD"

the fact you thought katanas were not only versatile, but also thrusting weapons pretty much proves the real point of the argument made by sinery

#56 to #35 - applescryatnight
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
katanas arent multi-purpose.
thats why you have multiple different blades with different uses.
shorter blades for stabbing and thrusting, like a tanto or shoto.
the katana is considered a long blade, so it is basically for slashing only.
User avatar #37 to #35 - sinery
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Samurai are spoiled cunts though.
User avatar #38 to #37 - garin
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
The highest classes always are
User avatar #46 to #30 - anonymoose
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
You need weight behind a stab to break through mail. Katanas are light.
#10 to #8 - thatonesouthernkid
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
any thoughts on the khopesh? I think they're sexy as ****, really underrated coolness factor
User avatar #23 to #10 - asasqw
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
As useless as they are cool
#42 to #23 - anon id: 526f18ac
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Not useless, it's a good chopper, pretty much an axe-sword.
#44 to #42 - glayn
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
None of the weight of an axe, with half the thrusting capacity of a sword. It looks cool and you could get away with using one, but really an axe or a short sword will do either of its functions better. If you want a sword-cum-axe, try a war-pick, pictured to the left.
#80 to #44 - thatonesouthernkid
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
it was actually often used to reach around shields and tear them away, so it is useful in that regard. but I will have to hand it to you than when the time comes to pierce through plate it's going to be as useless as a spoon ladle. but keep in mind that it was designed for dispatching lightly armored foot soldiers. actually **** that, egyptians didn't wear ANY ******* armor. but I don't doubt its ability to slice through cloth and leather armors.
#81 to #80 - glayn
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/04/2014) [-]
Fair enough, I'll bow to your superior knowledge on the subject, I'm not really a history buff, what I do know is about Roman and Medieval Britain but what you say makes sense! Is that one a replica though? o.0 It looks worryingly like its mould forged.
User avatar #84 to #81 - thatonesouthernkid
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2014) [-]
so in short, the earlier ones actually were.
User avatar #83 to #81 - thatonesouthernkid
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2014) [-]
the egyptians didn't have the technology for forging steel despite recent developments in forging at the time as well as their adept skills in technology. so they did what the japanese did and made use of what they had: Bronze and iron (but iron was only used in the new kingdom period). what they would do to make a useful weapon with a razor sharp edge that wouldn't chip during battle is they would make a mold of the weapon with the edge being slender like that of a katana, this side was used for offense. The spine would be thicker, it was used for blocking and parrying to avoid chipping the edge. the egyptians, as smart as they were, just never got around to inventing the furnace; so steel was never an option. the biggest drawback to the khopesh was the amount of training needed to wield it, because if used improperly you ****** up your weapon and would most likely die. so it was more of an elite soldier weapon.
#85 to #83 - glayn
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(09/04/2014) [-]
I can imagine, made in a forge I'd expect it to shatter if you attempted to block any weapon with weight behind it, but then I suppose warfare was different in that region.
User avatar #57 to #10 - sinery
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Unless it can turn your enemies into ash, I'm not really interested.
User avatar #62 to #57 - jimmyrustlinhustla
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
I'd just shoot you with my M16a4 Service rifle.
User avatar #65 to #62 - sinery
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
That would be unwise.
User avatar #68 to #65 - jimmyrustlinhustla
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
yeah because you're funny and I like you
#69 to #68 - sinery
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
User avatar #13 to #10 - tomahawkkit
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
get an ax, save some money
User avatar #31 to #8 - commontroll
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
But if it's Samurai Jack who's actually talking, then it most definitely will do the trick.
#15 - almostninja
Reply +94 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
> Accuses me of being ill-prepared   
> Missing 90% of his armor
> Accuses me of being ill-prepared
> Missing 90% of his armor
#51 to #15 - theowerdawg
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
his reason  = ladies get wet around him and want him, therefore he doesn't need heavy armour
his reason = ladies get wet around him and want him, therefore he doesn't need heavy armour
#52 to #15 - anon id: 15b4f025
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Still 10% more than you!
#16 to #15 - ronjeremysweiner
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
who needs armor when ur on shrooms and trippin balls across bifrost!
User avatar #61 to #15 - nemecyst
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
To be honest chainmail is more than most people had during war. The most common form of armor was nothing at all for most people, leather armor for wealthier peasants, chainmail for men-at-arms, and plate armor for knights.

Plate armor and weapons were prohibitively expensive, hence why armor was commonly passed from father to son
#1 - crazyolitis
Reply +44 123456789123345869
(09/02/2014) [-]
#20 - sweatanus
Reply +33 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
This is thin, transparent mail, and worn over a t-shirt. Not to mention he is wearing aventail on his head with nothing under or over it.
He isn't ready for battle either.
Mail to be useful has to be thick woven so it would absorb impact. You would have a thick leather coat under it, to protect you from getting chain rings into your body,
And never ever put chain on your hair without something under it. Padding to protect you from impact and because chain will pull half your haircut off when you take it off.
#24 to #20 - superoldbadgertwo
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
That's a coif he's got on his head. An Aventail is chainmail attached to a helmet, usually a bascinet helmet.

But yeah, padding's hella important. The chainmail might stop the blade, but it won't stop the impact.
#3 - aldkai
Reply +23 123456789123345869
(09/02/2014) [-]
#43 - Tazdingo
Reply +13 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
>no plate
#49 to #43 - anon id: 36d3ed32
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Plate armor wasn't as common as you seem to think. Especially not early on.
User avatar #53 to #49 - conzota
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
He could of still spent more money on his chain mail, the rings on those pieces are huge
User avatar #32 - dawggz
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Serious question here.

Can that mail protect against a ******* 2 handed axe attack ?
Axe weighs roughly over 20 kgs. made of Iron.
User avatar #45 to #32 - neoexdeath
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Depends on the strength of the person swinging it around. At low levels of force,it'll soften the blow enough to prevent it from actually cutting into the flesh. Furthermore, it'll likely cause intense bruising and/or broken bones.

Now, if someone's strong enough, the armor weak enough, or both...Then you're right screwed. Heavy melee weapons tend to cut through chain mail pretty effectively if you're strong enough to hit hard.
User avatar #47 to #32 - iamkagji
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Like neo said. It also depends on the type of axe and how it's being swung. If it comes in from the side or the front it'll afford more protection, but coming straight down on the shoulder and you're ******.
User avatar #34 to #32 - thegreenrecon
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
If its modern steel chainmail and he didnt cheap out sure, it wont break, now the squishy human inside said armour... mmmm thats up for debate.
#19 - liberalgodess
Reply -6 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Chainmail doesn't offer even the slightest protection against modern weapons.

Only neckbeard medieval wannabes who play runescape buy this kind of ****.
User avatar #48 to #19 - iamkagji
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Or, y'know, the people who buy this ****, then go out with their friends and beat the **** out of each other with medieval weaponry for fun
User avatar #73 to #48 - tankeruber
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
>liberalgodess

Im thinking it's a troll.
User avatar #79 to #73 - liberalgodess
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
or
or...
or.........
maybe I'm just a liberal
User avatar #82 to #79 - tankeruber
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2014) [-]
Nah, confirmed for troll, thank you for clearing any possible doubt I still had.
#7 - squidgy
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
That ******* I <3 NY shirt tho
User avatar #12 to #7 - styketor
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
Maybe he realy does love New York and just wants to protect the city he loves so much.
#36 - datmine
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(09/03/2014) [-]
He needs some heavy armor.   
 And of course someone to help him put it on.
He needs some heavy armor.
And of course someone to help him put it on.