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No homo

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Views: 29953
Favorited: 13
Submitted: 06/03/2014
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Comments(135):

[ 135 comments ]

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#1 - ihearcolors ONLINE (06/03/2014) [+] (1 reply)
#30 - pillowhumper (06/04/2014) [+] (5 replies)
Norwegian, 18, never had sex, doesn't look promising either
at least i got my hands....right?
#31 to #30 - mysteriouswaiz (06/04/2014) [-]
I didn't have faith in myself until one day I said **** it.... so I raped someone
#62 - specialone (06/04/2014) [+] (9 replies)
I didn't cum the first 3 times I had sex, and even then it was only in the morning after a lot of stuff the night before and pounding like a Drowzee on cocaine.   
   
Even now it takes me 						*******					 ages to cum yet give me porn and I'm done in a few tugs.   
   
Feels good but at the same time bad.
I didn't cum the first 3 times I had sex, and even then it was only in the morning after a lot of stuff the night before and pounding like a Drowzee on cocaine.

Even now it takes me ******* ages to cum yet give me porn and I'm done in a few tugs.

Feels good but at the same time bad.
#60 - neoexdeath ONLINE (06/04/2014) [-]
#11 - leagetshitpack (06/04/2014) [+] (5 replies)
i'm 17. norway as well. i feel with you bro
#73 - kingofhazard (06/04/2014) [+] (5 replies)




My first time was great, I was amazing at it
#3 - nlglet (06/03/2014) [+] (4 replies)
ty for replies, not really gay tho(suprise much)
#70 - nimba (06/04/2014) [+] (3 replies)
It's funny... you go through your life, thinking "hey, I'm pretty good at this sex malarky" and then every now and then you remember your first time(s).    
Battling noodle dick because of all the spaghetti dripping out your pockets while trying to put a condom on. You don't even know what you're going to do with it if it works HOW MANY HOLES ARE DOWN THERE? oh 						****					 oh 						****					 which one... i.. is that it? No? uh... is that it? No? C..can you...? Wet noodle again.    
Round two: all systems go, full mast let's do this. start prodding with wanger until she maneouvres herself into the right place. Pretty 						*******					 awesome sensation. Cue the most inconsistent humping, going at it like a 						*******					 rabbit for like 15 seconds until losing rhythm. No core strength yet, arms wobbling like bamboo shoots in a tropical typhoon. She tries dirty talk and bless me I can't focus on it so I reciprocate it in the cringeist ways. Thought occurs to me "do people talk during sex or are they mainly quiet?" Can't stop thinking about it, atmosphere in my head turns from passionate intimacy to awkward silence while sitting too close to someone at a bus stop. boner dead oh 						****					 too late.   
Nobody ever tells you that you just start off 						****					 at sex and it'll take years of constant practice before you actually get any good at it. They spend so much time trying to stop you doing it, but the most effective way would be to just show two idiot teenagers trying it for the first time.
It's funny... you go through your life, thinking "hey, I'm pretty good at this sex malarky" and then every now and then you remember your first time(s).
Battling noodle dick because of all the spaghetti dripping out your pockets while trying to put a condom on. You don't even know what you're going to do with it if it works HOW MANY HOLES ARE DOWN THERE? oh **** oh **** which one... i.. is that it? No? uh... is that it? No? C..can you...? Wet noodle again.
Round two: all systems go, full mast let's do this. start prodding with wanger until she maneouvres herself into the right place. Pretty ******* awesome sensation. Cue the most inconsistent humping, going at it like a ******* rabbit for like 15 seconds until losing rhythm. No core strength yet, arms wobbling like bamboo shoots in a tropical typhoon. She tries dirty talk and bless me I can't focus on it so I reciprocate it in the cringeist ways. Thought occurs to me "do people talk during sex or are they mainly quiet?" Can't stop thinking about it, atmosphere in my head turns from passionate intimacy to awkward silence while sitting too close to someone at a bus stop. boner dead oh **** too late.
Nobody ever tells you that you just start off **** at sex and it'll take years of constant practice before you actually get any good at it. They spend so much time trying to stop you doing it, but the most effective way would be to just show two idiot teenagers trying it for the first time.
#7 - felixjarl ONLINE (06/04/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#16 - wheretheheartroams (06/04/2014) [-]
**wheretheheartroams rolled image**
#10 - leobreacker (06/04/2014) [-]
10/10 laughed through the whole thing.
#87 - stalini ONLINE (06/04/2014) [+] (5 replies)
>Scandinavian
>faggot

Yep, seems about right
User avatar #99 to #98 - yonyon (06/04/2014) [-]
I now realize I'm stupid.
User avatar #67 - omenaaa (06/04/2014) [-]
English not my first language, it took 20 minutes to translate this post with a dictionary. Well done OP.
User avatar #112 - magicmace (06/04/2014) [-]
You must have lasted a very long time! Congratulations!
User avatar #13 - littlehozz (06/04/2014) [-]
well done. some chuckleswere had
User avatar #2 - icangetyoumad (06/03/2014) [-]
Well you got to have sex
so you got that going for you

so overall no win/lose here.

5/10 conflicted but amused
#117 - Orc (06/04/2014) [-]
Would've been funnier if you hadn't put "FML" before "So did he".
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