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#34 - anon (09/14/2015) [-]
Click to show spoiler
and for everything else...
#81 to #34 - supersixfourr (09/14/2015) [-]
Was thinking the exact same thing the entire time
#66 to #34 - wcar (09/14/2015) [-]
Dammit I saw that coming too
Dammit I saw that coming too
#36 to #34 - Ulmer (09/14/2015) [-]
ur a witty lil cunt i'll give ya that mate
#40 - swirlytwirl (09/14/2015) [-]
I get the feeling this is the plot of an anime in a nutshell.
User avatar #45 to #40 - notsohappygamer (09/14/2015) [-]
im pretty sure it is
#1 - xskullgirlsx (09/14/2015) [-]
Only 2 million dollars for telekinesis?

What a steal, go into heavy debt for so much power
User avatar #58 to #1 - mrfloop (09/14/2015) [-]
shut the **** up idiot themed account
User avatar #46 to #1 - notisac (09/14/2015) [-]
lend money
buy telekinesis
go to bank
steel money with telekinesis
nobody knows its you
pay debt (to the shady guy you lended it from)
User avatar #47 to #46 - trollmobile (09/14/2015) [-]
to lend is when you give it to someone else
to borrow is when someone else gives it to you.
also, steel is the metal, steal is the crime.
User avatar #48 to #47 - notisac (09/14/2015) [-]
oh mybad on the lend
but i wrote steel, god damn!

User avatar #49 to #48 - trollmobile (09/14/2015) [-]
it's ok little ***** , you can do it.
- black guy
#74 to #46 - othelox (09/14/2015) [-]
oh yes, i just love going to the bank and steeling from them.
User avatar #67 to #46 - juter (09/14/2015) [-]
>go to banks
>turn all money into steel
>value of dollar shoots up because money turning into nonprecious metal
#82 to #67 - chrisfisto (09/14/2015) [-]
>Dumps jet fuel on the money
#84 to #67 - anon (09/15/2015) [-]
hey love you juter gimmie a big wet kiss
User avatar #52 to #46 - kevinator ONLINE (09/14/2015) [-]
Why not just kill the guy who you borrowed from the moment you get your superpower ?
#61 to #52 - anon (09/14/2015) [-]
Because the same **** that happened in the comic starts again on a larger scale.

Did you even read smh
User avatar #85 to #46 - notisac (09/15/2015) [-]
A FACKING OMFG THIS GUY MADE A MISTAKE LETS THUMB HIM DA FACK DOWN BIG ******
User avatar #50 to #1 - dreygur (09/14/2015) [-]
I can sell my family's house for the coolest superpower? Tell me where to sign up
#42 to #1 - anon (09/14/2015) [-]
Hey now i don't want to end like akira.
User avatar #27 to #1 - demastrix (09/14/2015) [-]
Lol the firestorm you accidentally? started is quite entertaining
#73 to #1 - adderallxassassin (09/14/2015) [-]
i have nothing against you or any other themed account but that comment.... why?
User avatar #2 to #1 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
then use said power to "aquire" ******** of valuable materials which you sell for money to pay off said debt.

or, ya know...conquer the world and **** .
User avatar #3 to #2 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
Am I the only person that would use telekinesis for mundane **** like getting a new roll of toilet paper, or picking up my pen from the floor?

If I had telekinesis, I'd be the laziest ****** alive. I wouldn't lift my hand for anything except maybe to jack off, if I can't do that with telekinesis already.
User avatar #4 to #3 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
No, but that's the kinda **** you do AFTER you've got the entire world grovelling at your feet...
I personally would conquer to the to make it a all around better place..
User avatar #5 to #4 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
"You can't please everyone, all the time."

I guarantee, if you take over the world. People will kill you.

Telekinesis won't stop a bullet if you're sleeping.
User avatar #6 to #5 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
Yeah..when I said make it a better place, I don't mean the whole "Make everybody happy" kinda better, I mean the " **** the oil money and push towards clean, sustainable energy, better waste disposal/recycling, see about creating jobs and stopping the somewhat stupid levels of inflation" that kind of better...the one that would make the average joe's life a bit better and keep the world alive for the generations to come.

also, what is this sleep you speak of?
User avatar #7 to #6 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
I'm an insomniac, I don't sleep.

2-4 hours of broken sleep a night with a 1 hour nap at noon.
User avatar #8 to #7 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
I don't really sleep as per say, more of a light napping that ya wake from when ya want than anything else....

also if you had ************* telekinetic powers, you could use them to surround your domicile with stupidly high levels of armour, by like piling up hugeass metal walls and **** for when you sleep, and when you get up you can just mvoe em out of the way.
User avatar #9 to #8 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
I believe Telekinesis is my super power of choice to be honest.

It seems like it would have the most benefits with the least drawbacks, as well as being fairly easy to hide.

I like Telepathy, but I figure it would get annoying. Flying I can do with telekinesis. You just push yourself around in the air. Invisibility would be another interesting one to play with, but would ultimately end up with me being a criminal.

Fire/Ice powers could be dangerous, especially if untrained.
I wouldn't want super strength. It just seems too mundane.

Flash speed would be nice, and is probably the best super power overall, but is ridiculously overpowered.

I basically just want Magneto's powers, but for anything instead of just Metal.

This makes me really want a X-men movie that's rated R. Blood guts and gore, with powers being used as real weapons rather than fanciful toys.
I want to see just how overpowered they can make each power. Bring them to the utter extreme of what they can do.
User avatar #10 to #9 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
Mine would be the ability to control kinetic energy at will, with it I could stop a speeding missle or bullet just as easily as a pingpong ball, and I could even weaponise it, after all have you ever though about what would happen if you threw a small rock with the kinetic energy of a space shuttle launch?
#12 to #10 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
I'm well aware of what Kinetic energy can do.
When you've lived in Oklahoma I was there for a year , you research Tornadoes.
This is a piece of straw, embedded in a tree.

Also. Rocks moving at very high speeds are what cause Meteorites.
We've all seen the craters those can cause, and many of them were no larger than a softball.
User avatar #17 to #12 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
Yes, now you can see why it would be one of the more terrifyingly strong powers to have.

now imagine if instead of a pebble it was a steel ball-bearing or shard of glass, or even a knife...
User avatar #19 to #17 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
Regardless of what you are launching at people, if you put enough kinetic energy into it, they will be disintegrated on contact.

You could launch a grain of sand through someones skull and have their entire body explode from the sheer force.
User avatar #21 to #19 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
I'm well aware of that, but lets be a little realistic here, have you ever tried throwing sand..it dosn't exsactly hold together very well over distances.
User avatar #23 to #21 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
I'm not saying a handful of sand, I'm talking a single grain. Like a grain of salt, or a bread crumb. TINY objects, that with enough kinetic energy behind them, would be immeasurable forces of destruction, that can't be seen.

If you're manipulating it's kinetic energy at will, you'd be able to effectively control where it goes, at what trajectory, and what speed.

You'd also be able to alter those values at any point.
User avatar #24 to #23 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
True, but small objects would have the issue of being fiddly to use under pressure, so you'd need something that's small enough to be tricky to notice, but large enough to easily handle......darts perhaps?
User avatar #26 to #24 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
Toothpicks.
User avatar #28 to #26 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
But then there is the second issue, the thrown item would need enough mass to conserve the kinetic energy on impact with hardened targets...such as those wearing steel insert Armour laminated with Kevlar, would be tricky to get though such material with a toothpick, no matter how much energy you put behind it.

and before you say "infinite energy" the item you're throwing has to be able to survive the air resistance incured from traveling at such high speeds.
User avatar #29 to #28 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
Well, then I think a tungsten or nickel ball bearing would be your best bet.
User avatar #30 to #29 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
Or I could go about it the other way around, and instead of throwing things, I just walk up to them, (stopping any incomming attacsk with das power) and punch them in the face, while increasing the kenetic energy imparted onto them from said punch...turning them into thin red paste...
User avatar #32 to #30 - Tusura (09/14/2015) [-]
Or just alter their kinetic energy so they are flying upwards at a rapid rate.

Don't make them have a exit velocity. Just enough to send them into the air, so they have a minute or so to think about why they are about to smash into the ground.
User avatar #11 to #10 - highkingtorygg (09/14/2015) [-]
I like that idea, but instead absorb the kinetic energy, if you're shot, the bullet will fall to the ground after touching you, and you will be able to release the equal amount of force into whatever else
User avatar #15 to #11 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
While that sounds like it would be better, the issue with having you absorb the energy, is that it would have a rather clear limitation as to how much you can absorb/expel at any one time.

Where is if you went with my original idea, controlling the energy at will, you could cancel the energy of any incoming object to null as well as multiply the energy of anything you throw with the only limit being how well you have control over your power, sure It would take more pratice to get right, but it would be far more effective in the longrun.
User avatar #16 to #15 - highkingtorygg (09/14/2015) [-]
limitation how?
User avatar #18 to #16 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
"if you're shot, the bullet will fall to the ground after touching you, and you will be able to release the equal amount of force into whatever else"

that would imply that the power is the ability to transfer kinetic energy rather than control it, meaning you would have to source it somewhere before discharging it.
User avatar #20 to #18 - highkingtorygg (09/14/2015) [-]
true
but it's not as overpowered meaning it would be a better power for fiction
User avatar #22 to #20 - notyuu (09/14/2015) [-]
maybe so, but overpowered would only come into the equation if we were talking comic-books here, but we're not...instead we are talking theoretical real world powers and potential application...oh which note, what power would you have?

yes power, as in singular.
User avatar #25 to #22 - highkingtorygg (09/14/2015) [-]
that depends...
the power to control probability would be nice
but the ability to selectively disregard the laws of physics would be better I don't believe in gravity *starts floating*, friction no longer exists for me, etc
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#14 to #10 - Tusura has deleted their comment [-]
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#33 - wakadoo (09/14/2015) [-]
fix'd
#43 - newdevyx (09/14/2015) [-]
6000 dollars for bulletproof vest
User avatar #44 to #43 - keatontheghostfox (09/14/2015) [-]
Yeah a glock would be like $500, and a bullet proof best would also be around that much, maybe less
User avatar #62 to #43 - dorfdorfdorf (09/14/2015) [-]
its a really nice vest
#63 to #43 - shaturnex (09/14/2015) [-]
Have you heard of fashion, baby?
#76 to #43 - mulletisha (09/14/2015) [-]
It's gucci
#39 - barakakaka (09/14/2015) [-]
What i expected...
User avatar #68 - congorepublic (09/14/2015) [-]
And getting your ass congo'd pays you
User avatar #69 to #68 - ppheadbuttface (09/14/2015) [-]
CAN'T WRONGO THE CONGO
#70 to #69 - congorepublic (09/14/2015) [-]
mfw plebs try to start some ****
#56 - defski (09/14/2015) [-]
Comment Picture
#51 - hoodrh (09/14/2015) [-]
Click to show spoiler
This is worth even more than 3 million $$
User avatar #31 - lirfy (09/14/2015) [-]
reminds me of toying with your enemies in Dishonored
#37 to #31 - aizeinstein (09/14/2015) [-]
I prefed blinking on top of down and doing the land-kill thing. But that was because I relied heavily on blink and non-lethal methods. Wasn't a good killer but a good hider.
User avatar #38 to #37 - aizeinstein (09/14/2015) [-]
*top of them
#72 - nipplelessmage (09/14/2015) [-]
why is he buying a gun when he has perfectly working rocket Launcher?
User avatar #75 to #72 - Marker ONLINE (09/14/2015) [-]
think of it like Toon Town yeah, remember that **** ? , you can just pull whatever he **** you want out of your pocket, but you're still probably buying **** anyway.
#77 to #75 - funpunk (09/14/2015) [-]
Man, Toontown was the **** . Too bad it was one of those games that made you pay for 90% of it. Like Wizard101, which was also the **** and still continues to be.
User avatar #59 - thismustbeseen (09/14/2015) [-]
You mean to tell me that I can get powers of telekinesis and teleportation for just $5 million? Sign me right the **** up.
#79 - sparkysniper (09/14/2015) [-]
Figured I'd ask on here, I'm looking for the gif version of the "You're so ******* basic" comic. Can anyone help?
#54 - thecolored (09/14/2015) [-]
blowjobs are also free
#57 to #54 - defski (09/14/2015) [-]
That's the funny.
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