Jokes
I ordered a book on Migrant workers but it hasn't come yet. I guess they use the same shipping method.
I invited the Muslim family next door for a barbecue. I told the husband that his wife was cheating on him. She wasn't, I just needed the rocks on my lawn moved.
I saw this nice Flatscreen TV at the mall today. It was a bit pricey, so I decided to wait until the next sale to buy it. Or until police shoot a black guy again.
Shortly after discovering the god particle, scientists report they've found the "Allah Particle." Until it blew itself up, that is.
Feminists like to moo that internet porn is ruining sex. Hey, just because Messi is better than me at Football doesn't mean I'm giving it up.
I used to be scared of the dentist because of the pain. Now I'm scared because of the cost.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry escaped from his chamber.
An Iranian judge walks out of his chambers laughing his head off. A colleague approaches him and asks why he's laughing.
"I just heard the funniest joke in the world!"
"Well, go ahead, tell me!" says the other judge.
"I can't - I just gave someone ten years for it!
As a divorced man, I cried at the news of the royal baby. It's another child I'll never see but have to pay for my whole life.
Give a woman a fish and she'll make you dinner. Give a woman a laptop and she'll start a blog complaining that men are dominating the fishing industry.
People tell me Manny lost to Floyd at the fight of the century. I call ******** . At the end, Mayweather had two black eyes, a flat nose, and puffed lips!
With the upcoming election, it's important to keep in mind that Hilary outsourced her only meaningful job to Monica Lewinsky, and she blew it!
Sweden announced it's putting minority voters first. It's about ******* time someone looked out for us white people!
The orphanage I run burned down and killed 80 kids. Thank god I don't have to tell their parents!
My wife said she'd like another baby. I said thank god, the one we have is ******* annoying!
During sex I **** my wife up the ass, spit in her face, call her a dirty cunt, smack her ass, and she loves it... but one comment about her driving...
What do you do when you come across a paraplegic? Give her a towel and apologize.
I invited the Muslim family next door for a barbecue. I told the husband that his wife was cheating on him. She wasn't, I just needed the rocks on my lawn moved.
I saw this nice Flatscreen TV at the mall today. It was a bit pricey, so I decided to wait until the next sale to buy it. Or until police shoot a black guy again.
Shortly after discovering the god particle, scientists report they've found the "Allah Particle." Until it blew itself up, that is.
Feminists like to moo that internet porn is ruining sex. Hey, just because Messi is better than me at Football doesn't mean I'm giving it up.
I used to be scared of the dentist because of the pain. Now I'm scared because of the cost.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry escaped from his chamber.
An Iranian judge walks out of his chambers laughing his head off. A colleague approaches him and asks why he's laughing.
"I just heard the funniest joke in the world!"
"Well, go ahead, tell me!" says the other judge.
"I can't - I just gave someone ten years for it!
As a divorced man, I cried at the news of the royal baby. It's another child I'll never see but have to pay for my whole life.
Give a woman a fish and she'll make you dinner. Give a woman a laptop and she'll start a blog complaining that men are dominating the fishing industry.
People tell me Manny lost to Floyd at the fight of the century. I call ******** . At the end, Mayweather had two black eyes, a flat nose, and puffed lips!
With the upcoming election, it's important to keep in mind that Hilary outsourced her only meaningful job to Monica Lewinsky, and she blew it!
Sweden announced it's putting minority voters first. It's about ******* time someone looked out for us white people!
The orphanage I run burned down and killed 80 kids. Thank god I don't have to tell their parents!
My wife said she'd like another baby. I said thank god, the one we have is ******* annoying!
During sex I **** my wife up the ass, spit in her face, call her a dirty cunt, smack her ass, and she loves it... but one comment about her driving...
What do you do when you come across a paraplegic? Give her a towel and apologize.
| |