Jokes on him. . Storytime /b/. Feel free to contriboot wt your own similar stories. Hired wants me to get a summerjob do i do that at age -14 spretty sure its i
Home Original Content Funny Pictures Funny GIFs YouTube Funny Text Funny Movies Channels Search

hide menu

Jokes on him

Storytime /b/. Feel free to contriboot wt your own similar stories.
Hired wants me to get a summerjob
do i do that at age -14
spretty sure its illegal
sany' way I ask my neighbors ifl could dog sit while they' re on vacation
sthis is allmost to please my dad
definitely don’ t want to do this ****
ttheir dog is as old as me
std
sbik ass labrador
sthing looks like its three steps from deaths door
days into
unlock the doodoo their apartment
We ******* dead
call Jim and ask what to do with it
she says take it to a vet who’ sjust down like 4 blocks
VET
DUE
tell him how sounds
tthey anticipated it and made plans to get it cremated
show do i get this big ******* lab down 5 flights of stairs and at blocks down the street without having people see me carrying this dead dog
don’ t have a car or license
Him tells me to put it in his daughters luggage that was left behind
sso i **** covered dog into the suitcase
weenie it has a broken ******* set rkwheels
sso i' m carrying this **** down the stairs
sheave as hell for my ‘lat year old body
sgetti the
ssome dudebro asks ifi need help
ston‘ t want him to question the luggage
sor seeing the dead dog if it opens or some ****
she insists and helps me carry it down
smake up some ******** that its electronics
ssome sort system
tthese are heavy right?
swe getto the firstblood
she lifts it up on his shoulders and bolts
shatto call Jim and explain that his pink luggage and dead dog got stolen because some guy thought it was speakers
cant even imagine his face when he opened that ****
...
  • Recommend tagsx

Comments(202):

[ 202 comments ]

Show All Replies Show Shortcuts
Show:   Top Rated Controversial Best Lowest Rated Newest Per page:
Order:
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#5 - akabei ONLINE (03/22/2014) [+] (37 replies)
I think that's one of the best greentext stories I've ever read
I think that's one of the best greentext stories I've ever read
#12 - I Am Monkey (03/22/2014) [-]
The man later died of inability to even.
The man later died of inability to even.
#26 - mattdoggy (03/23/2014) [+] (20 replies)
>dad used to be a stoner prankster and the things would always go way wrong
>half the stories people tell me make me wonder how i'm still alive
>my dads friends are hanging out with me at a cookout one time and they ask me if i can help unload some garbage which i just hide
>one of them laughs and says "just like a Derpington to not get rid of something right"
>proceed to tell me about how they caught an unusually large bobcat once and his mom told him to get rid of it
>it was sickly, but he decided to nurse it back to health
>turns out the thing was mean as hell and proceeded to try and kill anything that it saw near its cage
>eventually they realize they have to get rid of it
>they work some sleeping meds into some hamburger meat and it gets knocked out
>they have nothing to carry it in so they stuff it into a suitcase and plan to just let it go near a dump
>my dads drugged up self has a better idea
>they wait until the thing is woken up in the case and drive it into a ghetto near the edge of town and a swamp
>they leave the suitcase in the middle of the road and sure enough someone stops and picks it up
>4 big burly black guys in a fancy car who got around 40 yards down the road before someone must have opened it
>they all shot out of the car while the thing was still driving and the bobcat just went wild into the backseat until the car went into the swamp
>i realized my dad was an idiot, but a fun one at that
#44 - maaarknuuuut (03/23/2014) [+] (1 reply)
#2 - slowshade ONLINE (03/22/2014) [-]
hfw
#15 - thebobinito (03/22/2014) [-]
I was expecting to read:   
   
>he lifts it up on his shoulder and I hear a rip   
>before I knew it, the suitcase had split and the dog came tumbling down on him   
   
Good ending though, 						*******					 lol'd 11/10.
I was expecting to read:

>he lifts it up on his shoulder and I hear a rip
>before I knew it, the suitcase had split and the dog came tumbling down on him

Good ending though, ******* lol'd 11/10.
#49 - breezykun (03/23/2014) [-]
**breezykun rolled a random image posted in comment #3 at Meth ** hfw
#95 - ryanroyazzopardi (03/23/2014) [+] (9 replies)
**ryanroyazzopardi rolled a random image posted in comment #4 at Can'tstoptherock.mp4 ** His face when he opens the case
#96 to #95 - guu (03/23/2014) [-]
**guu rolled a random image posted in comment #1000 at Hottest Girls on FJ Submission **
Nuhuh, it's this.
#17 - chopliver (03/22/2014) [+] (5 replies)
#24 - MasterManiac (03/23/2014) [-]
Thief's FW he opens the suitcase.
Thief's FW he opens the suitcase.
#1 - anonymous (03/22/2014) [+] (1 reply)
HE WAS MERELY PRETENDING
#171 - internetnick (03/23/2014) [-]
I hear 14 in 2008 and think "damn, that's young."
Then I realize that was 6 years ago. I was 14 in 2008.
User avatar #23 - jzwangpk (03/23/2014) [+] (7 replies)
Okay, even if this is true, I'm pretty sure your so-called '14-year-old body' could easily have given chase. I used to have a labrador, and that 'dudebro' was probably not going anywhere fast lugging that thing.
#31 to #23 - ennemi (03/23/2014) [-]
He might be able to catch up to him, but what is he suppose to do ?
User avatar #105 - metalmind (03/23/2014) [-]
Yeah, last time I read that story, It had a Laptop instead of speakers, and took place in new york city.
#57 - girguy (03/23/2014) [-]
ten out of 						*******					 ten   
   
   
this is beyond what I expected
ten out of ******* ten


this is beyond what I expected
#68 - afroadam (03/23/2014) [-]
14 year olds face when the dude took off with it
14 year olds face when the dude took off with it
#9 - alexianary (03/22/2014) [-]
Same thing happened to one of my friend's relatives, xcept that the dog died during a trip and they put it in a box for a television that was in at the time on their way back. They parked in a lot to get more food for the trip someone broke into their car and stole the box with the dead dog inside
#16 - xcoreyx (03/22/2014) [-]
One of the better laughs I've had in a long while. Thanks OP
One of the better laughs I've had in a long while. Thanks OP
[ 202 comments ]
Leave a comment
 Friends (0)