I wish I thought of that. Scammer: Hello sir, we got a message saying that your computer has a virus Setsan: Oh? Is that so? Scammer: Yes indeed. I will help yo
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I wish I thought of that

Scammer: Hello sir, we got a message saying that your computer has a virus
Setsan: Oh? Is that so?
Scammer: Yes indeed. I will help you through to getting rid of the virus
Setsan: Okay but I have a question
Scammer: And what's that?
Setsan: What's a computer?
Scammer: ...
*Hangs up on Setsan*
Setsan: ...
Setsan: What a ******

THE NEXT TIME YOU GET A CALL
FROM A BLOCKED on UNKNOWN
DONE, BUT THERE' S BLOOD
EVERYWHERE". THEN HANG UP.
...
+476
Views: 25086
Favorited: 19
Submitted: 07/19/2014
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#7 - anonymous (07/20/2014) [-]
*Getting a call*

The Indian guy tries to direct me through it all, whilst I act like I'm **** with computers. After 15 minutes I finally say: "Do they have this software for Linux?" & he hung up :c
User avatar #2 - namehasntbeentaken ONLINE (07/20/2014) [-]
my probation officer didn't find this funny
User avatar #5 - ansjovis (07/20/2014) [-]
"I don't think you're getting the job after all, mr Anderson"
#12 - sabertoothmoose (07/20/2014) [-]
Got a 						****					 ton of calls like this a year ago, i was in a sort of limbo between ending school and starting in the army, so i had nothing to do - and these calls pissed me off beyond ignoring them. So i started to notice at what times a day they would ring, and prepared accordingly. so everytime they rang, i proceeded by first talking through the first steps, and then asking them to wait when i hit a "problem", while i played some soothing (stereotypical) indian music on my phone. longest call i had lasted around 10 minutes. They still call. but i evolve, always finding new ways to 						****					 with mr. George Michaels from microsoft....   
   
needless to say  there are probably a couple indian guys who want me dead
Got a **** ton of calls like this a year ago, i was in a sort of limbo between ending school and starting in the army, so i had nothing to do - and these calls pissed me off beyond ignoring them. So i started to notice at what times a day they would ring, and prepared accordingly. so everytime they rang, i proceeded by first talking through the first steps, and then asking them to wait when i hit a "problem", while i played some soothing (stereotypical) indian music on my phone. longest call i had lasted around 10 minutes. They still call. but i evolve, always finding new ways to **** with mr. George Michaels from microsoft....

needless to say there are probably a couple indian guys who want me dead
#3 - shine (07/20/2014) [-]
(Insert name of city you reside in) Sperm Bank, you spank it we bank it!
#18 - nickotak (07/20/2014) [+] (1 reply)
Scammer: (In horrible american accent. Clearly Indian) HEY SIR WE GOT A NOTIFICATION THAT YOUR SOFTWARE HAS A VIRUS.

Me: **** ... **** ....

Scammer: Sir?

Me: CALL LANGLEY IMMEDIATLY AND TELL THEM I'VE BEEN COMPRIMISED THE SOFTWARE HAS HOLES IN IT.

Scammer: Sir we just need you to go to this link and download the software.

Me: I CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO FIX IT THE ******* RUSSIANS WILL BE HERE ANY MINUTE. CALL. LANGLEY. THE. **** . UP. I NEED A SAFEHOUSE!

Scammer: Just go to the link and i w-

Me: SHUT THE **** UP HOLY **** WE NEED TO FILES, JEFF. WE NEED THE ******* FILES JEFF!

*Scammer Hangs up*

I **** you not this actually happened. My mom will verify.
User avatar #6 - hanyouvale (07/20/2014) [+] (2 replies)
I almost did this one time and i am glad i didnt. it was the U.S. Army the called
User avatar #9 to #8 - hanyouvale (07/20/2014) [-]
other than the fact that i am enlisted, here are a few reasons wy the army would be calling me at ungodly hours:

1) ask me questions that i have no answer to simply because the questions are based around my life 10 or more years ago.

2) they just wanna bitch at me because someone on my reference sheets dont have a middle name listed, and they assume everyone in america has a middle name because 90% of americans have a middle name.

3)bitch at me because the only person i have listed in my foreign connections dont have a middle name listed so they assume she has a middle name because 90% of americans have a middle name.
#1 - atrocitustheking (07/19/2014) [+] (3 replies)
User avatar #13 to #10 - thechosentroll (07/20/2014) [-]
Wait, I thought I was the evil one.
User avatar #23 - laxxy (07/20/2014) [-]
>implying i ever get phonecalls
#21 - puffyclouds (07/20/2014) [-]
actually, don't do that
i got a call from someone who was unknown
i thought it was a prank or something like that
turned out i had unpaid bills
that's why they called me
#19 - munyman (07/20/2014) [+] (1 reply)
...it could be the police...
User avatar #15 - dashandsmash (07/20/2014) [-]
Nevada national Sperm Bank, you spank it we bank it.
User avatar #11 - theoneweirdguy ONLINE (07/20/2014) [-]
*inb4 cops call your cellphone about a gruesome murder*
User avatar #4 - overthetopawesome (07/20/2014) [-]
I have had that phone call
I just acted like I was computer illiterate and the scammer was getting angrier with everything I said then he wanted me to download an big brother admin software so I hung up
still waiting for them to call again. hope they do
#16 - anonymous (07/20/2014) [-]
Enjoy your phone bills.
User avatar #17 - slenderwolf (07/20/2014) [-]
Hello, Texas crematorium, you kill 'em we grill 'em, how may I direct your call?
Houston Sperm Bank, you squeeze it we freeze it, how may I help you?
Joe's Slut Hut, you got the doe we got the hoe, how may I be of service today?
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