I'd read that. . I wish there were necklaces given to us at birth that were half of a unique shape and your soulmate wore the other half and they got warmer the I'd read that I wish there were necklaces given to us at birth half of a unique shape and your soulmate wore the other they got warmer
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I'd read that

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I wish there were necklaces
given to us at birth that were
half of a unique shape and your
soulmate wore the other half
and they got warmer the closer
together you were and colder
the further away we were
you could gee on this journey
when yeu’ re ready to find your
other half so that Wu could be
spared all the pain and
heartbreak of being played with
by those who don' t take dating
as seriously as you do
you should write a book
...
+1261
Views: 51217 Submitted: 11/18/2013
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[ 309 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
#12 - sinery
Reply +497 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
... Finds a grave.
#277 to #12 - anon id: f8034f33
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
...She just happens to be 11
#308 to #12 - jalthelas
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
This truly does kill the man.
User avatar #138 to #12 - crazehtoast
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Could be part of the book.
Soulmate leads to a grave.
#19 to #12 - rgmayhem
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Well, I'm saddened now...
#142 to #12 - habasparkz
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
#25 to #12 - taurusguy
Reply +21 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Never too late to find your new inner fetish.
#26 to #25 - taurusguy
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
or sacrifice a virgin to satan and resurrect your other half, either way works
#28 to #12 - sinery
Reply +32 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
These replies.
#223 to #28 - hillbillypowpow
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Now's my chance to post antics pictures.
#23 to #12 - imgoingtorapeyou
Reply +149 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
... Owns a shovel
#69 to #23 - artyomthebadass
Reply +23 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
...Necklace will warm them up
#261 to #23 - bleeduntildeath
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
*finds michael jackson*
#228 to #23 - utarefson
+3 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#31 - AlexPaincakes
Reply +264 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
MFW I hold my necklace
#206 to #31 - anon id: 6f759c18
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
...and then you realized the necklace was anal beads.
User avatar #7 - moshimoshi
Reply +130 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
And then it turns out that your soulmate is a midget eskimo.

Anyway, I'll add some tips here if someone is bothered by being alone.

Partners are like lost keys. You find them when you aren't looking, and the more desperate you are the more they hide from you.

Clubs and pubs are the worst place to look for your future spouse.

If you are too picky about looks you don't deserve a good partner, and that's just as well because you'll only find skanks/jocks and one night stands.

Never be jealous you dumb ****. If he/she wants to go to the bahamas for a week with her friends you just say "have fun!"

Confidence is the key attribute to attract women. Turning off your computer and going out in the real world is the next best. They care much less about looks, muscles and penis size than you think.

Never underestimate the dog trick. Plus, getting a dog will in itself get you a loving companion that's always happy to see you (and gets you up off your ass and out in the fresh air).
#66 to #7 - sparkysparkybooman
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
"Partners are like lost keys. You find them when you aren't looking, and the more desperate you are the more they hide from you."
Is pretty bad advice. Especially for introverts.
User avatar #128 to #66 - xchewsifferx
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
I wouldn't say it's bad advice, it's just not applicable to everyone.

I mean you have to kind of agree that if you're so worried about being with someone, you might put yourself in a bad relationship that you otherwise would have kept yourself out of
User avatar #306 to #128 - moshimoshi
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Yes... also the thing i call the "desperadar". I have a friend who is good looking, nice and friendly in every way, has money, has a nice big house with pool and stuff. He's also 41 years old and for the last 20 years he's been DESPERATE for a girlfriend. Or well, OK he's had 3 relationships. All short . He's a bit tiresome and can talk about the same thing for days, but I swear it's the girls desperadar that makes him single. He just tries too hard and they feel it at once.
User avatar #29 to #7 - timmity
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
size and nationality doesent ******* matter, its personality for soulmating, ohysical appearance for.. physical mating
#98 to #7 - unholyjebus
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Didn't say anything I haven't heard before except for the lost key example, which I haven't heard of due to it being terrible advice. If people listened to that, then all it would mean is that they are less likely to approach a person that they like.
User avatar #117 to #98 - commontroll
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
He means if you're just going everywhere looking for a spouse. Go and look for a friend instead, but be confident that it could become more. When you accept yourself and you're okay with being alone (in a healthy way) then that's when you're probably most ready for a serious relationship.
#221 to #7 - dantastic
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
"getting off your ass" huh?

please, oh wise one. tell me where to start looking.
#20 to #7 - rgmayhem
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Your words are gold, and I respect you for them...
(Pic relevant b/c of the thumbs up...)
#53 to #20 - anon id: ae33db22
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Who you gonna call for advice?
GHOST NAPPA!
User avatar #24 to #7 - miklthepikl
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
I agree with everything except for the 'dont be jealous clause'. tried that **** twice and it backfired hard, ruining both relationships. Instead, i'd say dont be overbearing, just use desecration. Like, if its for a week in the bahamas with her family, w/e, but if its a week in the bahamas with her friends to go party, be careful and lay down some ground rules
User avatar #193 to #7 - deafmagnets
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
I like this but I'm not sure about the jealous one... My uncle and aunt married for 23 years recently split up because he found out she was cheating on him. She always went to her mom's in their beach house, but come to find out she went else where and was cheating on him... My cousin actually may not be his, he doesn't want to get a test done because he say's she is his and he'll never stop doubting that...
User avatar #219 to #193 - nighkey
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
She would have cheated anyway, more than likely. Just some place else if not there. When married, guy or girl, if you really do love the person you are with, you could be locked up with a nude person of your preferred gender who is a perfect 10/10 and refuse there advances. It's a weird feeling to suddenly not feel sexually attracted to anyone else, for it would hurt you do break the bond you have with a partner. That doesn't mean you don't find other people beautiful or attractive, or don't fap to desirable content, but in real life you just stop doing more than flirting at the most when you are actually happily married.
User avatar #305 to #193 - moshimoshi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Thata always the risk, isn't it? But being the tiniest bit jealous RUINS your relationship. I've been with my wife for 15 years, and if she's cheating on me she's extremely discreet, and i''ve never come close to cheating on HER. Sometimes I go hunting away from her for a month at a time, and worriyng about her would ruin the fun completely. Of course, if I walked in on her banging another dude (if she was banging another chick I'd ask to join in like any normal guy), violence would happen. But it's stupid and pointless to worry about it in advance.
User avatar #39 to #7 - shuckmywang
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
i know im gonna get thumbed down for this but
honestly, while looks arent the most important thing, it is important to have a healthy level of physical attraction. girls will not sleep with somebody they are attracted to.
bottom line, keep yourself decently groomed, and it wont be a problem. somebody will find you attractive. unless youre an ugly ******. then youre just SOL
User avatar #110 to #7 - commontroll
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
All of this. All my life I looked for a relationship, it wasn't until I truly stopped looking for one that I met a girl who took my plans for the future and tossed them in the air (in a good way) and gave me a reason to be adventurous again.

Of course, she also just broke up with me a few weeks ago after dating almost a year, so take that with a grain of salt. Regardless, there's no such thing as a soul mate, you have some who are more compatible than others, and you have to find them. If they leave, then you'll eventually find somebody who won't, and they're that much better because of that.
User avatar #215 to #7 - nighkey
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
I am a married woman. I can vouch this is 100% true, every bit of it.

Unfortunately I met my soul mate on World of Warcraft. But I only said hi because of his unique pet. (The dog trick..) Back in that day, you had to feed your pets on wow, so it made him stop questing to feed the pet, and we ran into eachother in 'town.' Ended up skinny dipping in blood hoof lake and sleeping together in the inn about the time the sun was coming up. The server time matched real time, the sun really was coming up.
User avatar #247 to #215 - chezburgadominator
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
That's so sweet.
User avatar #285 to #215 - stripey
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
that's a nice story
#10 to #7 - Jowi
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Some of these are terrible advice.
User avatar #11 to #10 - moshimoshi
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
If you say so. I understand it's quite different in countries with "date culture" but I meant every word. I could also add that when you get to 30-35 it's a mans world and the chicks that married the "cool" arseholes at 20 are available in droves.
User avatar #52 - exceeding
Reply +45 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
**exceeding rolled user mimithedragonborn ** this glorious bastard is my soulmate and spirit animal
#54 to #52 - mimithedragonborn
Reply +101 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#296 to #54 - thebiggestfail
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
I LOVE IT
User avatar #297 to #296 - mimithedragonborn
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
I NOTICED THAT LOTS OF PEOPLE ALSO LOVE IT.
THANK YOU.
I LOVE MY .GIF COLLECTION AS WELL.
#298 to #297 - thebiggestfail
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
I presume you'd seen that TomSka video right?
User avatar #299 to #298 - mimithedragonborn
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Nope.
I've been trying to find the source.

Which video is it?
#300 to #299 - thebiggestfail
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Coming Out by TomSka. Such a FANTASTIC video
User avatar #301 to #300 - mimithedragonborn
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Ah.
Merci, amico.
#302 to #301 - thebiggestfail
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Of course!
#311 to #54 - anon id: 0c8d64fe
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
sorry i had to link this here
i couldn't just post it.... on your profile... being anon and all. i'm just a little birdy here to show you something you may want to see....
www.funnyjunk.com/user/shis.no/3341#3341
i don't know any of you but i just looked into your situation and it seems like this is an appropriate thing to see...
User avatar #312 to #311 - mimithedragonborn
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Who are you?
I'm not going to read that. That's a ******* private conversation between two of my friends, who I respect.
God I hate it when people do this.
#77 - mrfourtysevenman
Reply +49 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
BUT WHUT IF SHES UGLEY
#198 to #77 - anon id: f4f54e29
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Then quit being a bitch and actually love someone you sellout.
User avatar #86 to #77 - deadmansdope
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
You got a gun?
User avatar #89 to #86 - mrfourtysevenman
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
why yes i have four actually.
.22
mosin
or shotguns?
User avatar #91 to #89 - deadmansdope
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
I don't even know where I was going with this...
User avatar #92 to #91 - mrfourtysevenman
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
lets go to the range mebruddah!
User avatar #113 to #77 - martycamp
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
You give her a paper bag
User avatar #156 to #77 - antisocialtwilight
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Then she likely wouldn't be your soulmate. In a soulmate, physical attraction can be equally as important as personality. Simple as that.
User avatar #157 to #77 - timmity
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
it says soulmate not *********
User avatar #80 to #77 - leafonthewind
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
maybe she has a hotter sister

inb4 mrs fourty eight woman
#84 to #80 - mrfourtysevenman
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
but will i ever find my true love?...
#67 - xxitzchubbsxx
Reply +31 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Any one else get the impression of some 17 year old chick who bounces from guy to guy after her relationships fail and then wonders why guys are all the useless and the same?
#289 to #67 - anon id: a12ccd0e
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
It was taken from tumblr, so that's kind of implied.
User avatar #111 to #67 - thechosentroll
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
****, I was gonna say the same thing. Good call.
User avatar #73 to #67 - brucekillah
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
yepp
#75 to #73 - xxitzchubbsxx
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Sweet not just me then friend
#118 - thechosentroll
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
And then you finally get together, share that long expected kiss and the necklaces get so hot that they burn through your necks and decapitate you.

The end.
#196 to #118 - anon id: edcd7bf2
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
I enjoy your use of Fran.
I enjoy your use of Fran.
#222 to #118 - anon id: 31a91de4
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Sounds like someone has some relationship issues.
#290 to #118 - coupdegrace
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
you should write a book.
#133 to #118 - ofalo
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
thank god i wasnt the only one thinking along those lines
User avatar #1 - hoponthefeelstrain
Reply +19 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Heartbreak is half the reason we enjoy finding our soulmate so much. What if you're ready and they aren't?
User avatar #2 to #1 - mrsgooser [OP]
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Won't know until the sequel
User avatar #3 to #2 - hoponthefeelstrain
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
I bet someone will fall in love with someone who's piece doesn't fit theirs.
User avatar #139 - fyaq
Reply +16 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
What if she turns out ugly
or fat
or worse....
black
#231 to #139 - utarefson
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #295 to #139 - errdayimfjing
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
hahahahhahaa first thing that actually made me laugh out loud in a while.
#140 to #139 - flufflepuff
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
if she is any of those things, you'd probably be okay with it.
seeing as how they'd be the best possible match for you.

if you're a shallow asshole with no soul, she will be too. everything works!
User avatar #141 to #140 - aldheim
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
But... black?
#233 to #140 - fyaq
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
its a joke, not a dick.
So don't take it so hard.
#250 to #233 - flufflepuff
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
why would you take a soft dick?
#50 - keybladewarrior
Reply +10 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Then it turns out to be a feminazi extremist atheist vegan that is try to be lesbians but can't because of the ******* necklace. And you're here like, "So, you like Pokemon?" "**** YOU, RAPIST PIG, RRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH."   
   
my mind is an enigma. or just ******* weird.
Then it turns out to be a feminazi extremist atheist vegan that is try to be lesbians but can't because of the ******* necklace. And you're here like, "So, you like Pokemon?" "**** YOU, RAPIST PIG, RRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH."

my mind is an enigma. or just ******* weird.
User avatar #79 to #50 - roflerman
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Well if it was that and you didn't like it then she wouldn't be your soulmate? O.o
User avatar #83 to #79 - keybladewarrior
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
I concur, good user. It says that you get warmer or colder when you find your soulmate. So, if this is a birth right necklace to find your soulmate, the person you are suppose to live with the rest of your life, it could lead you to someone either you will either have to deal with or be miserably together. Or I'm just overthinking and it would lead yout o a perosn that could be like your other half.
User avatar #87 to #83 - roflerman
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
That's what I'm thinking OP had in mind. That it wasn't just somebody you got stuck with and your supposed to love just because your necklace says so, but from a more "higher power" kind of stand point that would make the person your necklace fit with out to be "born to be with you" in a sense. Somebody that would be completely compatible with you.
#94 to #87 - keybladewarrior
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/18/2013) [-]
Ah, yes. I completely understand now. I overthought to such possibility. Forgive me.
Ah, yes. I completely understand now. I overthought to such possibility. Forgive me.
#279 to #94 - roflerman
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/19/2013) [-]
Sa'll good.
Sa'll good.