I Am Very Smart

Student: Can I borrow a pencil?
Teacher: I don' t know. Can you?
Student: Yes. I might add that colloquial
irregularities occur frequently in any
language. Since you and the rest of our
present company understood perfectly
my intended meaning, being particular
about the distinctions between "can"
and "may" is purely pedantic and
arguably pretentious.
Teacher: True, colloquialism and the
judicious interpretation of context help us
communicate with nuance, range, and
efficiency. And yet, as your teacher, my
job is to teach you to think about
language with care and rigor.
Understanding the shades of difference
between one word and another, and to
think carefully about what you want to
say, will give you greater power and
versatility in your speech and writing.
Student: Point taken. Maal have a
pencil?
Teacher: No, you may not. We do not
have pencils since the state cut funding
for education again this year.