I am the manager
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127 comments displayed.
#9
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europe (09/08/2015) [-] 
tfw a customer wants to talk to the manager and the manager just repeats to them what you told them
#88 to #84
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captainotaku (09/09/2015) [-] Team 4 Star's Dragon Ball Z Abridged.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nYozPLpJRE&list=PL6EC7B047181AD013
www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nYozPLpJRE&list=PL6EC7B047181AD013
#86 to #84
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flamingwhitetiger (09/09/2015) [-] team fourstars dragonball abridged
this one is the lord guru movie i think
this one is the lord guru movie i think
#107 to #6
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EnergizierAnon ONLINE (09/09/2015) [-] Gohan: i need an adult..
Goku: I Am an adu-
Gohan: No. No you are not.
Goku: I Am an adu-
Gohan: No. No you are not.
#38
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jaigurudevaom (09/08/2015) [-] I heard a woman complain that the changing room floor was wet...
the changing room for a swimming pool
the changing room for a swimming pool
#108 to #65
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alabamacoffeebean (09/09/2015) [-] I work at a Starbucks. You'd be surprised (or maybe not) how many people get upset because "this tastes like coffee! I dont like the taste of coffee!"
#112 to #108
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methylgroup (09/09/2015) [-] Bartender in a college town at a popular sorority bar:
"What will you have?"
"What's good?"
"Whiskey sour?"
"I don't like whiskey."
"Rum and Coke?"
"I don't like rum, either."
"Vodka and Red Bull?"
"Vodka is bad for you and I don't like sweet things."
"Beer?"
"Too many calories."
"...Ma'am, what do you want?"
"The three of us will split a Triple Strawberry Daiquirita."
"...Coming right up."
Daquirita was essentially a drink that held vodka, rum, splash of whiskey, pureed super sweet daiquiri, and floated with beer. It's not only disgusting, but it's literally everything they "didn't want."
This was every night for me.
"What will you have?"
"What's good?"
"Whiskey sour?"
"I don't like whiskey."
"Rum and Coke?"
"I don't like rum, either."
"Vodka and Red Bull?"
"Vodka is bad for you and I don't like sweet things."
"Beer?"
"Too many calories."
"...Ma'am, what do you want?"
"The three of us will split a Triple Strawberry Daiquirita."
"...Coming right up."
Daquirita was essentially a drink that held vodka, rum, splash of whiskey, pureed super sweet daiquiri, and floated with beer. It's not only disgusting, but it's literally everything they "didn't want."
This was every night for me.
#113 to #112
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alabamacoffeebean (09/09/2015) [-] I understand.
There's this "secret menu" thing, which is basically just a bunch of white girls sharing crazy complicated ******** on Pinterest, and they all expect me to know what the ******* **** a snickerdoodle crunch frappe or some such is, and get mad when I dont know what they're wanting. I've started refusing to even guess what might be in one of those things when they refuse to pull it up on their phonesbecause "the other guy made it different. this isnt right!"
And if we ever run out of white mocha or pumpkin spice......
There's this "secret menu" thing, which is basically just a bunch of white girls sharing crazy complicated ******** on Pinterest, and they all expect me to know what the ******* **** a snickerdoodle crunch frappe or some such is, and get mad when I dont know what they're wanting. I've started refusing to even guess what might be in one of those things when they refuse to pull it up on their phonesbecause "the other guy made it different. this isnt right!"
And if we ever run out of white mocha or pumpkin spice......
#114 to #113
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methylgroup (09/09/2015) [-] Dude, I HATED people handing me their phone with ****** requests like, "Can you make this drink with 8 different specialty liqueurs that you clearly don't have sitting behind you? WHAT WHY NOT?!!"
#154 to #114
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alabamacoffeebean (09/10/2015) [-] listen, man, if you can make a proper daiquiri and rum sour, you've got my business.
#156 to #155
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alabamacoffeebean (09/10/2015) [-] I make them at home so I can tinker a bit with the recipes and rums (I'm a whore for good rum). I've been surprised too many times with blended up alcoholic slushies. But then, I rarely go to bars. Every once in a while I'll have a drink at dinner wherever I'm at; that's always a hit or miss kinda thing
#22
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hourlyb (09/08/2015) [-] Story time.
>Work at Target
>Pretty nice job, to be honest. Boring, but easy.
>Unlike Brawlmart, most of the time guests/customers/other employees are decent and normal.
Most of the time
>9:45 on July 2-3, about 15 minutes from closing
>Basically cleaning up the shelves for tomorrow
>Suddenly ******* banshee wails from down the aisle
>White trash Jupiter and her three screaming moons are stopping for a late night snack, which, in human terms, would be a feast for a small village
>"Where are the damn chips." she belches at me.
>"Oh, they're over in aisle G36."
>Her moons are still screaming, running up and down the aisle
>"I already checked there. Why aren't there any there?"
>July 4th was literally right around the corner, so "picnic" food like chips sold out really quick.
>"I'm sorry Ma'am, we probably just ran out tonight. They'll be in stock tomorrow. Sorry for the inconvienience."
>Most people would probably say 'Alright, thanks for the help' and leave at this point
>Not her
>She really needed those chips
>"Listen here, dumbass. I drove 30 ******* minutes to get this **** . I'm not leaving until I get it. So get them, understand. "
>"I'm sorry, Ma'am, but if we don't have it on the shelves, we don't have it at all. Bu.."
>" ******** . You're just being ******* lazy. ******* check the backroom, I know you ******* have it."
>Before I was about to tell her we can't just do that with food, I see the stores AP, basically a security guard/manager who walks around in plain clothes. Let's call him Tom. Tom was a insanely fit dude in his late 20's, and was probably the chillest dude in the store. He might have been ex-Army or something, but truth be told I don't know.
>"Woah, what's up here?"
>She waddles to face him
>"Finally, someone who knows something. This guy says you don't have anymore chips, can you tell him to get some."
>Tom looks at me, then back at the heaving planet system before him
>"He's right, Ma'am. We aren't allowed just grab food items from the back. Please che.."
>" **** YOU! I WANNA TALK TO A MANAGER ABOUT THIS! NEVER HAVE I...!"
>Tom's eyes light up. No ******* joke, you can tell he's probably dreamed about doing this.
>"Lady, I. am. A MANAGER. And I don't appreciate you yelling at my employee's like this. So, since we're closing in about 10 minutes, I'm going to have to ask you to check tomorrow. Maybe you'll have better luck coming in before we're closing."
>MFW
>Jupiter is so shocked that he basically told her to **** off that she actually does leave, with her three moons following her orbit
>Tom walks over, and says "Don't worry about her. She's prolly just pissy because her life sucks."
>I shrugged, "Whatever, just because her ex sucked at pulling out isn't my problem."
>He ******* laughs, and then promises to never tell anybody about it.
TL; DR My boss was a ******* bro and saved my ass from a raging hamplanet
>Work at Target
>Pretty nice job, to be honest. Boring, but easy.
>Unlike Brawlmart, most of the time guests/customers/other employees are decent and normal.
Most of the time
>9:45 on July 2-3, about 15 minutes from closing
>Basically cleaning up the shelves for tomorrow
>Suddenly ******* banshee wails from down the aisle
>White trash Jupiter and her three screaming moons are stopping for a late night snack, which, in human terms, would be a feast for a small village
>"Where are the damn chips." she belches at me.
>"Oh, they're over in aisle G36."
>Her moons are still screaming, running up and down the aisle
>"I already checked there. Why aren't there any there?"
>July 4th was literally right around the corner, so "picnic" food like chips sold out really quick.
>"I'm sorry Ma'am, we probably just ran out tonight. They'll be in stock tomorrow. Sorry for the inconvienience."
>Most people would probably say 'Alright, thanks for the help' and leave at this point
>Not her
>She really needed those chips
>"Listen here, dumbass. I drove 30 ******* minutes to get this **** . I'm not leaving until I get it. So get them, understand. "
>"I'm sorry, Ma'am, but if we don't have it on the shelves, we don't have it at all. Bu.."
>" ******** . You're just being ******* lazy. ******* check the backroom, I know you ******* have it."
>Before I was about to tell her we can't just do that with food, I see the stores AP, basically a security guard/manager who walks around in plain clothes. Let's call him Tom. Tom was a insanely fit dude in his late 20's, and was probably the chillest dude in the store. He might have been ex-Army or something, but truth be told I don't know.
>"Woah, what's up here?"
>She waddles to face him
>"Finally, someone who knows something. This guy says you don't have anymore chips, can you tell him to get some."
>Tom looks at me, then back at the heaving planet system before him
>"He's right, Ma'am. We aren't allowed just grab food items from the back. Please che.."
>" **** YOU! I WANNA TALK TO A MANAGER ABOUT THIS! NEVER HAVE I...!"
>Tom's eyes light up. No ******* joke, you can tell he's probably dreamed about doing this.
>"Lady, I. am. A MANAGER. And I don't appreciate you yelling at my employee's like this. So, since we're closing in about 10 minutes, I'm going to have to ask you to check tomorrow. Maybe you'll have better luck coming in before we're closing."
>MFW
>Jupiter is so shocked that he basically told her to **** off that she actually does leave, with her three moons following her orbit
>Tom walks over, and says "Don't worry about her. She's prolly just pissy because her life sucks."
>I shrugged, "Whatever, just because her ex sucked at pulling out isn't my problem."
>He ******* laughs, and then promises to never tell anybody about it.
TL; DR My boss was a ******* bro and saved my ass from a raging hamplanet
#147 to #22
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candlejackismyhomi (09/09/2015) [-] >White trash Jupiter and her three screaming moons
I laughed so hard I transcended this dimension.
10/10, would read again.
I laughed so hard I transcended this dimension.
10/10, would read again.
#90 to #22
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slyforawhiteguy (09/09/2015) [-] **slyforawhiteguy used "*roll picture*"**
**slyforawhiteguy rolled image**mfw i hear the glorious german space magic that is the G36. ALso the G36c mmhmm nice
**slyforawhiteguy rolled image**mfw i hear the glorious german space magic that is the G36. ALso the G36c mmhmm nice
#98 to #97
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slyforawhiteguy (09/09/2015) [-] hah i wish Australian gun laws are tighter then a cats asshole
#63 to #22
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theshadowwalker ONLINE (09/08/2015) [-] Fellow Target team member. Your AP sounds a lot like mine, the 'glow in his eyes' is so ******* true!
Also, it's still weird to me how other Targets have different aisles for their departments. To me, dry/dairy/frozen is W and always remains that way. But hey, that's just me.
I don't have anything valuable, so plz take this unrelated gif.
Also, it's still weird to me how other Targets have different aisles for their departments. To me, dry/dairy/frozen is W and always remains that way. But hey, that's just me.
I don't have anything valuable, so plz take this unrelated gif.
#133 to #63
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lickmeforfree (09/09/2015) [-] Idk where you are from, but if you ever go to Australia, and you need a job, dont apply to NSW eastgardens target, you will die. the manager is this super fat pissed **** who has an orbit size of the galaxy.
#37 to #22
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lookatmyhouseofwax (09/08/2015) [-] Any story including hambeasts getting BTFO is good in my opinion
#35 to #13
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planetpluto (09/08/2015) [-] I had to lift my left ear phone off my head by an inch and even then it felt like a centipede was trying to crawl it's way in there.
#15 to #14
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stormieskys ONLINE (09/08/2015) [-] Well, the iron hot iron ball is sinking in a cube of butter... I think. The butter finds it pretty hot though
#24 to #15
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malaysianflight (09/08/2015) [-]
It's the RHNB from carsandwater on YouTube. Enjoy his many videos of testing what happens when you take a red hot ball of nickel and put it onto random objects.
#77
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lesolan (09/09/2015) [-] I used to work for a guy that owned this shirt shop in a touristy area of Florida (near the beach). Hr wasn't a morning person, so he'd have me come in and open shop for him sometimes. I would like to note that while I am definitely not a morning person as well, I certainly was more able at hiding it when faced with customers. One day, just after Henry (the owner/my boss at the time), a woman was bitching at me because not all of the shirts were, shall we say, 'family friendly'... As I am selling and making more of them. Eventually she gets pissed because I'm kind of ignoring her in favor of people who intend to help pay my rent (see: buy stuff), and finally just demands for my manager. So I said, 'alrighty then.' Then I turned around and yelled into the back rooms for Henry. 2 minutes later, he comes into the store, looking pissed as **** that I'm interrupting his smoke break. So, with lit cigarette and nearly full cup of coffee in hands, and a shirt that has the exact thing the lady was bitching about on, the only thing that could be heard (aside from the ****** music Henry had on the speaker system, and the cars going by outside the open front door) is my unhinged laughter. It was a good day to be working that job.
#121
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anon (09/09/2015) [-] Manager stories.
I'm the manager of a pizza joint. I work the dough station next to the phones, so the front line always ask me for help. We have this one customer who is always a huge ******* ordeal because he's outside of our delivery area, and ABSOLUTELY ******* REFUSES to order from the store that is literally a block away from him. We tell him this every time, and he still insists that we deliver outside of our area, just for him. But we do it anyways because the GM says so, but we cannot guarantee any time for delivery.
So I get a new kid, a 16 year old high school girl, on the Front line answering phones, and this douche calls us up. Kid does good, respectfully tells him that he's outside of our delivery area, and asks if he would like the phone number of the store that would deliver to him.
I ******* hear this idiot scream, over the phone, over the sound of both of our ovens, over the sound of my other manager beating the **** out of some frozen dough balls.
Girl on the front line drops the phone in shock, and I spring and pick it up.
"Thank you for calling [pizza place] my name is Leon, would you like to try our-"
"I AM ******* SICK AND TIRED OF YOU GIVING ME THE SAME **** EVERY ******* TIME I TRY TO ORDER FROM YOU RETARDS"
At this point I have every right to hang up, and mark on his account that we will no longer take his order because he was abusive to the staff. But I let him finish because he made the new girl cry.
"I TELL YOU EVERY TIME THAT I REFUSE TO ORDER FROM THE OTHER STORE AND THAT YOU SHOULD DELIVER TO ME. HOW ******* HARD IS THAT TO GRASP? LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR ******* MANAGER."
"Sir, I am the manager."
"NO YOU"RE ******* NOT, LET ME TALK TO THE REAL MANAGER."
"Speaking."
"LET ME TALK TO YOUR DISTRICT MANAGER THEN"
"I am not authorized to give out our district manager's personal number in this case. If you would like me to take down your name and phone number, I will have him return your call as soon as he comes into the store again." (Except that no, he won't)
"THIS IS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE SERVICE, I AM GOING TO GET YOU ******* FIRED" (Doubtful, since I've known the DM since I was in middle school)
"Sir, let me just ask you one thing."
"WHAT THE **** DO YOU WANT"
"Would you like the number of the store that delivers to you?"
He hung up on me and I laughed.
I mean goddamn it's just ******* pizza. The **** we went through with him on a regular basis could not have been any worse than what the other store that he refused to order from did.
![Manager stories.
I'm the manager of a pizza joint. I work the dough station next to the phones, so the front line always ask me for help. We have this one customer who is always a huge ******* ordeal because he's outside of our delivery area, and ABSOLUTELY ******* REFUSES to order from the store that is literally a block away from him. We tell him this every time, and he still insists that we deliver outside of our area, just for him. But we do it anyways because the GM says so, but we cannot guarantee any time for delivery.
So I get a new kid, a 16 year old high school girl, on the Front line answering phones, and this douche calls us up. Kid does good, respectfully tells him that he's outside of our delivery area, and asks if he would like the phone number of the store that would deliver to him.
I ******* hear this idiot scream, over the phone, over the sound of both of our ovens, over the sound of my other manager beating the **** out of some frozen dough balls.
Girl on the front line drops the phone in shock, and I spring and pick it up.
"Thank you for calling [pizza place] my name is Leon, would you like to try our-"
"I AM ******* SICK AND TIRED OF YOU GIVING ME THE SAME **** EVERY ******* TIME I TRY TO ORDER FROM YOU RETARDS"
At this point I have every right to hang up, and mark on his account that we will no longer take his order because he was abusive to the staff. But I let him finish because he made the new girl cry.
"I TELL YOU EVERY TIME THAT I REFUSE TO ORDER FROM THE OTHER STORE AND THAT YOU SHOULD DELIVER TO ME. HOW ******* HARD IS THAT TO GRASP? LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR ******* MANAGER."
"Sir, I am the manager."
"NO YOU"RE ******* NOT, LET ME TALK TO THE REAL MANAGER."
"Speaking."
"LET ME TALK TO YOUR DISTRICT MANAGER THEN"
"I am not authorized to give out our district manager's personal number in this case. If you would like me to take down your name and phone number, I will have him return your call as soon as he comes into the store again." (Except that no, he won't)
"THIS IS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE SERVICE, I AM GOING TO GET YOU ******* FIRED" (Doubtful, since I've known the DM since I was in middle school)
"Sir, let me just ask you one thing."
"WHAT THE **** DO YOU WANT"
"Would you like the number of the store that delivers to you?"
He hung up on me and I laughed.
I mean goddamn it's just ******* pizza. The **** we went through with him on a regular basis could not have been any worse than what the other store that he refused to order from did.](http://static2.fjcdn.com/comments/Manager+stories+i+m+the+manager+_e89637be5aa09419867f405589bf0b68.jpg)
I'm the manager of a pizza joint. I work the dough station next to the phones, so the front line always ask me for help. We have this one customer who is always a huge ******* ordeal because he's outside of our delivery area, and ABSOLUTELY ******* REFUSES to order from the store that is literally a block away from him. We tell him this every time, and he still insists that we deliver outside of our area, just for him. But we do it anyways because the GM says so, but we cannot guarantee any time for delivery.
So I get a new kid, a 16 year old high school girl, on the Front line answering phones, and this douche calls us up. Kid does good, respectfully tells him that he's outside of our delivery area, and asks if he would like the phone number of the store that would deliver to him.
I ******* hear this idiot scream, over the phone, over the sound of both of our ovens, over the sound of my other manager beating the **** out of some frozen dough balls.
Girl on the front line drops the phone in shock, and I spring and pick it up.
"Thank you for calling [pizza place] my name is Leon, would you like to try our-"
"I AM ******* SICK AND TIRED OF YOU GIVING ME THE SAME **** EVERY ******* TIME I TRY TO ORDER FROM YOU RETARDS"
At this point I have every right to hang up, and mark on his account that we will no longer take his order because he was abusive to the staff. But I let him finish because he made the new girl cry.
"I TELL YOU EVERY TIME THAT I REFUSE TO ORDER FROM THE OTHER STORE AND THAT YOU SHOULD DELIVER TO ME. HOW ******* HARD IS THAT TO GRASP? LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR ******* MANAGER."
"Sir, I am the manager."
"NO YOU"RE ******* NOT, LET ME TALK TO THE REAL MANAGER."
"Speaking."
"LET ME TALK TO YOUR DISTRICT MANAGER THEN"
"I am not authorized to give out our district manager's personal number in this case. If you would like me to take down your name and phone number, I will have him return your call as soon as he comes into the store again." (Except that no, he won't)
"THIS IS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE SERVICE, I AM GOING TO GET YOU ******* FIRED" (Doubtful, since I've known the DM since I was in middle school)
"Sir, let me just ask you one thing."
"WHAT THE **** DO YOU WANT"
"Would you like the number of the store that delivers to you?"
He hung up on me and I laughed.
I mean goddamn it's just ******* pizza. The **** we went through with him on a regular basis could not have been any worse than what the other store that he refused to order from did.
#128 to #121
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bwiedieter (09/09/2015) [-] I have a morbid fascination with stories like these. It´s like staring into the abyss in the heart of men.
