I am the deification of the spaghetitron
Alright guys, I was going to make this into a comic, but I realized I'm not that artsy, so it's gonna be a greentext. This is the story about Paris, love, and Autist sex.
>Be me
>In Paris for spring break on a school trip
>Have slightly autistic roommate
>Cool enough guy, just doesn't know how to act in social situations
>Spent half an hour talking about how amazing his new vest was
>Get sick and stay at the hotel one day
>When he comes back, he's together with this weird girl
>She was cool enough, but she was known for pissing herself.
>Like, really often.
>Go to bed that night, roommate's hanging out with other people.
>Wake up to someone saying "Hey" at two in the morning
>About to reply when I hear second voice.
>It's my roommate and his girlfriend. They're sharing a bed.
>Feel awkward, but they're just talking, so I go back to sleep.
>Next day they're all over each other.
>Always hugging, walking down the street with arms around each other
>It was weird and kinda annoying.
>Get back to the hotel that night
>Absolutely exhausted from being sick and running around all day
>Go to bed as soon as possible.
>Wake up to voices at 2 am again
>About to tell them to shut up when I notice
>They're not talking
>They're grunting
>All I could think was "NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO&quo t;
>Exhausted brain thinks "WE NEED TO LEAVE"
>Exhausted brain also thinks "It'd be awkward to disturb them"
>Decide I need to exit stealthily
>Roll out of the bed, and go prone on the ground.
>Have to crawl across entire room, including in front of roommate's bed
>Start army crawling on ground.
>Being as silent as possible.
>Still hearing the grunting
>At foot of roommate's bed
>Terrified of getting accidental autist facial
>Pass with no semen on my person
>Finally get to the door.
>Can't do this silently
>Throw myself up, grab the handle, and slam into the door.
>Remember the door was a pull door.
>Bounce off door
>As I was falling through the air, I regretted every decision ever.
>Landed on ground, realizing the sound I made was probably loud enough to wake literally everyone up.
>Laying on ground, grunts have stopped.
>Stand up slowly, open door, and close it behind me.
>MFW They told me the next day that they noticed as soon as I rolled out of bed
>MFW I learned they never even had sex
>MFW I have no face anymore.
>I am the deification of the spaghetitron.
>Be me
>In Paris for spring break on a school trip
>Have slightly autistic roommate
>Cool enough guy, just doesn't know how to act in social situations
>Spent half an hour talking about how amazing his new vest was
>Get sick and stay at the hotel one day
>When he comes back, he's together with this weird girl
>She was cool enough, but she was known for pissing herself.
>Like, really often.
>Go to bed that night, roommate's hanging out with other people.
>Wake up to someone saying "Hey" at two in the morning
>About to reply when I hear second voice.
>It's my roommate and his girlfriend. They're sharing a bed.
>Feel awkward, but they're just talking, so I go back to sleep.
>Next day they're all over each other.
>Always hugging, walking down the street with arms around each other
>It was weird and kinda annoying.
>Get back to the hotel that night
>Absolutely exhausted from being sick and running around all day
>Go to bed as soon as possible.
>Wake up to voices at 2 am again
>About to tell them to shut up when I notice
>They're not talking
>They're grunting
>All I could think was "NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO&quo t;
>Exhausted brain thinks "WE NEED TO LEAVE"
>Exhausted brain also thinks "It'd be awkward to disturb them"
>Decide I need to exit stealthily
>Roll out of the bed, and go prone on the ground.
>Have to crawl across entire room, including in front of roommate's bed
>Start army crawling on ground.
>Being as silent as possible.
>Still hearing the grunting
>At foot of roommate's bed
>Terrified of getting accidental autist facial
>Pass with no semen on my person
>Finally get to the door.
>Can't do this silently
>Throw myself up, grab the handle, and slam into the door.
>Remember the door was a pull door.
>Bounce off door
>As I was falling through the air, I regretted every decision ever.
>Landed on ground, realizing the sound I made was probably loud enough to wake literally everyone up.
>Laying on ground, grunts have stopped.
>Stand up slowly, open door, and close it behind me.
>MFW They told me the next day that they noticed as soon as I rolled out of bed
>MFW I learned they never even had sex
>MFW I have no face anymore.
>I am the deification of the spaghetitron.
| |
