Husband 1- Wife 0

#6 - wertgf

Reply+471

(02/21/2014)[-]

Husband doesn't get any until next winter - 1-1

#128 to #6 - KillinTime#255 on commentsRank#255

Reply+4

(02/22/2014)[-]

it's his wife, he wasn't getting any anyway.

#53 to #6 - thesecretberry

Reply+1

(02/22/2014)[-]

being lazy > getting layed

#122 to #6 - lightshadow

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

I want you to thumb me down

#123 to #122 - wertgf

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

That's nice

#55 to #6 - anon id: 607cac5b

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

husband divorces that selfish cunt, moves to another country, she never sees a dime of his money, ***** hotter, younger and less selfish bitches for the rest of his life. Ex hubby 5 million, selfish ex cunt: shove that 1 point up your asshole!

#17 to #6 - zebestfapfoldah

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

At this moment husband knew, he ****** up.

#12 to #6 - anon id: 12cb4578

Reply0

(02/21/2014)[-]

doesnt that mean the wife doesnt get any either?

#35 to #12 - bann

Reply+47

(02/22/2014)[-]

A woman's spite is stronger than her sex drive typically...this is not typically true in the case of men.

#14 to #6 - jubbehhh

Reply-5

(02/21/2014)[-]

That just means the wife is a slut whose only influence and bargaining chip isn't their intellect, but their body.
Basically meaning their only use is for sex.

#44 to #14 - anon id: a32fb49a

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

Believe it or not, that is not the only conclusion you can draw from that statement

#21 to #14 - anon id: 13be5678

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

god you ******* suck

#18 to #14 - anon id: c3386c63

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

No that just means she's punishing him by not giving him sex.
Furthermore, you're either a 12 year old or a neckbeard.

#19 to #18 - jubbehhh

Reply-5

(02/22/2014)[-]

Found the whiteknight

#23 to #19 - imsodrunk

Reply-2

(02/22/2014)[-]

white knight how

#24 to #23 - jubbehhh

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

Showing empathy for a woman who abuses her role in a relationship and claiming that it empowers them and that she's doing nothing wrong. Then goes on to use two of the most commonly used, and worst insults.

#25 to #24 - imsodrunk

Reply+3

(02/22/2014)[-]

yea ok just so you know i wasnt the anon i just wanted to know why you called him white knight and your arguments good though he never said it empowered her

#26 to #25 - anon id: caf1b5d9

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

disregard that

i was anon

#27 to #26 - imsodrunk

Reply-1

(02/22/2014)[-]

i know i said i wasnt

#28 to #24 - anon id: fd623f48

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

lmao "abuse"

you've never had a girlfriend, have you?

#106 to #14 - disniggahere

Reply-2

(02/22/2014)[-]

"their only use is for sex", who are they? and how did you arrive to this general conclusion?

#10 - fuzzyballs

Reply+75

(02/21/2014)[-]

look at all these comments overthinking a simple joke

#68 to #10 - lamarisagoodname

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

what kinda nazi generalizes about every comment on Funnyjunk. I bet you're horribly insecure

satire

#121 to #68 - fuzzyballs

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

**** dude, that's deep

#8 - ninjagaiden

Reply+33

(02/21/2014)[-]

The amount of snow shoveling skill required here would be the equivalent of your average Canadian.

Clearly a man must have done this, as women not native to Canada rarely even know what a snow shovel is. I suspect foul play here.

If this picture was taken in Canada I revoke my statement.

#11 to #8 - SteyrAUG

Reply+8

(02/21/2014)[-]

It couldn't have been taken in canada. The ground is wet, and therefore not frozen.

#15 to #11 - moen

Reply+14

(02/21/2014)[-]

could be summer

#9 to #8 - crowd [OP]

Reply+2

(02/21/2014)[-]

Kinda looks like canada doesn't it?

#16 to #8 - dsendreturns

Reply0

(02/21/2014)[-]

The house holds a victorian figure (note the pointy roves) The doors and window shutters have a dutch feel to them.
This limits the options to either a Pennsylvania Dutch community or a lower portion of Ontario, possibly even Quebec.
The license plates in Canada are all white with blue letters and Pennsylvania plates are all white with black letters.

#20 to #16 - friedgreenpomatoes

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

PAfag here, the license plates are white with a blue band on top and a yellow band on the bottom.

#135 to #20 - dsendreturns

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

I was born in Pottsville PA actually, moved away in 1999. at the time I was there they were b&w.

#13 - include

Reply+28

(02/21/2014)[-]

#43 - redbannerman

Reply+26

(02/22/2014)[-]

And then he sleeps on the couch

Victory: Nobody

Revenge is like a circle, once it starts it never stops until someone grows up.
Overthinking jokes is also like a circle because it starts with an O.

#47 to #43 - shadowsynergy

Reply+5

(02/22/2014)[-]

Man refuses to sleep on the couch because it's his house too, she threatens divorce, he points out that she can't get along without him because all women are hopeless. He's right. Game set match, victory man.

#46 to #43 - anon id: cc903bb5

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

Most men don't mind sleeping on the couch

#45 to #43 - sugoi#187 on commentsRank#187

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

Why does the man always sleep on the couch?

#49 - bookyle

Reply+2

(02/22/2014)[-]

There need to be a good way of shoveling the drive way. Like if you could lay down a tarp or something when it starts snowing, and when it stops snowing just slowly roll up the tarp or something.

Anyone got a better idea?

#52 to #49 - jacklane

Reply+8

(02/22/2014)[-]

Get a snow blower.

#60 to #52 - jasohazard

Reply+16

(02/22/2014)[-]

Ah yes, Nordic women are great aren't they

#61 to #60 - jacklane

Reply+3

(02/22/2014)[-]

#63 to #61 - jasohazard

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

#94 to #52 - bookyle

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

ok, an efficient, cheap way that doesn't involve machines

#56 to #52 - saltyfries

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

this
I have one
it's a manly machine

#62 to #49 - undyingrage

Reply+2

(02/22/2014)[-]

tractor with plow ftw

#98 to #49 - pridefulmatthew

Reply+1

(02/22/2014)[-]

Fire!

#125 to #98 - misfitsftw

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

someone already tried that
You need to login to view this link
"fed up of battling the elements" "did not possess the willpower necessary to move four billion tons of white ********"

#29 - deezknuts

Reply-24

(02/22/2014)[-]

I mean seriously that's kind of a dick thing to do.

#31 to #29 - xxitzchubbsxx

Reply+4

(02/22/2014)[-]

why?

#32 to #29 - anon id: 029dd597

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

I know, right? She could have just shoveled the whole thing while she was there.

#36 to #32 - deezknuts

Reply+2

(02/22/2014)[-]

lol *highest of fives*

#76 to #36 - acemcgunner

Reply-2

(02/22/2014)[-]

die!

#75 to #29 - acemcgunner

Reply-7

(02/22/2014)[-]

geez, I don't know, man.. I wouldn't do that to my wife but, ya know what? , mmm it's a joke.. a real man wouldn't ******* do that to his wife!! so, maybe you're the dick, nooo, wait... you don't have one, you're a fag, cocksucker!!

#86 to #75 - germed

Reply+11

(02/22/2014)[-]

You showed him!

#88 to #86 - acemcgunner

Reply+1

(02/22/2014)[-]

**acemcgunner rolled a random image posted in comment #104950 at Social Board ** here have this, germed, as your reward...my gift to you, use it proud!!

#89 to #88 - germed

Reply+6

(02/22/2014)[-]

I don't like that reward

#91 to #89 - schitzopsycho

Reply+1

(02/22/2014)[-]

what game is this..

#95 to #91 - germed

Reply+4

(02/22/2014)[-]

no idea man, I don't watch wrestling

#92 to #89 - acemcgunner

Reply-1

(02/22/2014)[-]

**acemcgunner rolled a random image posted in comment #23 at German ads ** here then... better?

#134 to #75 - deezknuts

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

"it's a joke. a real man wouldn't do that to his wife"

I mean I completely undertand what you're saying, but that's not how jokes work.

a joke is me going "HAH you're a ****** you ****** faggot go jump in a pool of AIDS and 9/11"

because it's just words. if you get offended you're being offended by letters.

the difference is that UNDER THE CONDITION THAT THE POST IS TRUE, it would be more of a dick move than just something for *****+giggles. What i'm saying is that I would be pissed if it happenned to me.

NOW I STILL THINK ITS FUNNY

I'm not offended by the snow post, I'm just saying the husband is kind of a tool, which isn't wrong. I still think it's funny, but I also understand that if it's true, the joke surpassed words and became actions, making it actually influential in a practical sense.

tl;dr I'm not offended, it's just a little toolish

#133 to #75 - deezknuts

Reply0

(02/22/2014)[-]

We need to work on your insulting skills.

A lot

that was embarrassing to read

#58 - TittyCinnamon

Reply+10

(02/22/2014)[-]

good thing that arrow was there to show me where the husban shoveled. i probably wouldn't have found it otherwise.

#112 to #58 - jacobpicardy

Reply+1

(02/22/2014)[-]

you got nice titties for a little boy

#113 to #112 - TittyCinnamon

Reply+1

(02/22/2014)[-]

you look pretty good.

#51 - weirddark

Reply+8

(02/22/2014)[-]

#2 - sneleoparden

Reply+6

(02/21/2014)[-]

if being a terrible husband is a victory then yes I guess, or considering the possibility that she had to clear the driveway and is being a bitch about, then I guess he did well

#3 to #2 - crowd [OP]

Reply0

(02/21/2014)[-]

I'll be honest.
He does not seem like a good husband.
But, she also seems like a good wife.
Look at the house, pretty nice i guess.
Look at the driveway, it's big and a big garden.
Look at his car. Dodge charger ( i think )
Look at her car, Some liana or ****?
She did not steal his money.
But he should still do some **** at home