How to piss off your girlfriend. .. Can't relate How to piss off your girlfriend Can't relate
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> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
User avatar #18 - Karfeyenta
Reply -187 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
as a girl who's never had an orgasm with a partner... never even gotten close... Doing something like this is just rubbing a lot of emotion pain and insecurity in her face..
#24 to #18 - anon id: 431c304d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
With worry of coming across as a dick.

Perhaps the issue in you not having an orgasm with a partner, if attempted with more than one, lies with you and not the man. It is an easy thing to get a woman to orgasm, using the right position and adding fingers and lips to the mixture of thrust.

Perhaps you ought to talk with your partner, indulge in a few desires/fantasies.
#92 to #18 - kez
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Maybe you're just not worth the effort to him.
User avatar #107 to #18 - erikus
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Or maybe is a ******* joke and you fail at sex.
User avatar #128 to #18 - anusraper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
whale alarm !!!
#154 to #18 - chibullsa
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
***** this ain't reddit
User avatar #138 to #18 - ponieswererolled
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
lol rubbing
User avatar #28 to #18 - infinitereaper
Reply +26 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Maybe you just have a really big vagina
User avatar #118 to #18 - wellimnotsure
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Since you've been thumbed into oblivion, what are the Daedra like?
User avatar #42 to #18 - paronix
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Oh go cry for attention somewhere else
User avatar #29 to #18 - cannibislover
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Women are emotion, pain, and insecurity.
User avatar #37 to #18 - wellimnotsure
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
If you haven't had an orgasm you're probably doing something wrong
#51 to #18 - ilikeducks
Reply +10 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Thanks. I've been waiting to use this
Thanks. I've been waiting to use this
#69 to #18 - niggernazi
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
or you could save some electricity and embrace yourself for my giant 12 inch schlong if you know what i mean :^)
or you could save some electricity and embrace yourself for my giant 12 inch schlong if you know what i mean :^)
User avatar #84 to #69 - cocoman
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I love you.
User avatar #156 to #69 - sonnyboii
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
For some reason i find these hilarious as **** +
#44 to #18 - sedativechunk
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Apart from the war going on in the comments, allow me to add something insightful (I studied human sexuality in college from a famous sex expert ):
1) Perhaps this is an underlying health problem either physically, mentally, or both. Are you able to orgasm on your own? If so, there's nothing physically wrong with you, it has to be a mental-related issue. Perhaps you get nervous or weirder out and just can't get in the mood. There are alot of reasons to not get in the mood. Maybe you don't like/trust the people you are with enough. Just ideas. If you are having a physical problem though, you should see a doctor immediately, it could be something serious.
2) Are you sure you are not a lesbian or have a gender-related issue? I'm not saying you are/nothing wrong with that but one of my past relationships my girlfriend didn't like physical contact because she was a closet lesbian.
3) There is a word for this type of people I can't think of at the moment, but some women literally don't like having objects inside of their vagina, including sex toys and a penis even though they're heterosexual. If this is the issue, you should see a specialist that can help deal with sex-related problems, they can help you find ways to get comfortable with yourself.
4) Contrary to popular belief on the internet, a man's size does not matter, this has been proven time and again since the 1960's with Masters and Johnson's sex trials. Also a women cannot really be "stretched out", even after children sex is still relatively the same for both parties.
5) Maybe you've just had awful sex partners (in which case you can call me if you live in Western Pennsylvania ) I know alot of guys first times they don't last more than 20 seconds sometimes. That's not long enough to get a women off.

Good luck.
User avatar #88 to #44 - setimanosomo
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
You passed over a golden opportunity to say 'sexpert'
#89 to #18 - ishalltroll
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Either your partner is **** or you don't know how to sex.
So do something about it or quit bitching and masturbate like everybody else.
User avatar #66 to #18 - desuforeverlulz
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Explain how?
#56 to #18 - dubator
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Hate to break it to you, but you werent girlfriend just cumdumb.
Hate to break it to you, but you werent girlfriend just cumdumb.
User avatar #19 to #18 - godtherapist
Reply +227 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
SHUT THE **** UP. THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU.
#94 to #19 - wadawada
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #20 to #19 - Karfeyenta
Reply -98 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
insecure much? Do you have a little mouse pinkie for a dick?
User avatar #21 to #20 - godtherapist
Reply +77 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Yes I do. My dick is very small but it still doesn't change the fact that your insecurities have nothing to do with this post. Stop ruining a good joke with your ********.
User avatar #57 to #21 - kalimah
Reply +22 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
>expecting a woman to have sense of humor
User avatar #22 to #21 - Karfeyenta
Reply -99 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I was simply adding something to it. If you don't like it, get your stupid ass over it and **** off.
User avatar #31 to #22 - youngneil
Reply +117 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Sounds to me like you are the one that needs to get off.
User avatar #32 to #31 - godtherapist
Reply +46 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Awwww SNAP!
#50 to #31 - ilikeducks
Reply +29 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Damn son
Damn son
#99 to #50 - ilikecows **User deleted account**
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
ilikeducks?

ilikecows
#100 to #99 - ilikeducks
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Holy. ****.
User avatar #83 to #31 - cocoman
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
REKT
#129 to #31 - bossguycumsplash
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #95 to #31 - oceanfrank
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
it's not even the amazing comeback you just had, it's your username.
#93 to #31 - bogbean
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #23 to #22 - godtherapist
Reply +24 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I think that YOU are the one that needs to get the **** over it.

Life isn't fair, boo hoo, I need to masturbate because I don't know how to have sex properly.

Seriously?
User avatar #25 to #23 - dracolegacy
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
best argument ive seen today, and it wasnt at work, thank you.
User avatar #26 to #25 - godtherapist
Reply +32 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I'm thinking of becoming a comic. Instead of jokes I'd go on stage and just get angry the first stupid person to open their mouth.
User avatar #27 to #26 - dracolegacy
Reply +15 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
i think you would be a great act, just remember who supported your beginning when you get famous. free tickets will be more than sufficient.
#75 to #20 - killasmasha
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Don't know about this guy, but your "partner" clearly does..
#86 - ishalltroll
Reply +133 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Can't relate
Can't relate
#103 to #86 - anon id: cc2b202b
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
EU plugs masterrace
User avatar #116 to #86 - threadcreator
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I once bought a German product and tried plugging it into an Italian outlet. They don't work everywhere, unfortunately.
#123 to #116 - anon id: cba71d21
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
The plug in the picture works in Italy...
User avatar #130 to #123 - lordlolland
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
No no, he meant that the plugs in Italy don't work everywhere... Its Italy, if anything works as it should then it is either corrupt as **** or a mistake.
User avatar #157 to #130 - threadcreator
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
The Italian plugs are slightly wider.
User avatar #162 to #157 - lordlolland
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I know, I am just being casually racist against Italians.
User avatar #163 to #162 - threadcreator
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I hate them too.
User avatar #158 to #157 - threadcreator
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
but they do have regular EU plugs here
User avatar #6 - teoferrazzi
Reply +111 123456789123345869
(01/08/2014) [-]
I sat here looking at it for a while wondering how it happened, then I realised it's a plug from another country.
#7 to #6 - anon id: 020b31fa
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/08/2014) [-]
no you retard it's american
User avatar #8 to #7 - kaliban
Reply +33 123456789123345869
(01/08/2014) [-]
Dude, how is he supposed to know if he's never seen a north american plug before?
User avatar #14 to #7 - pheonixinstinct
Reply +23 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
not everyone on this site american.
i also hope this is bait
User avatar #90 to #14 - teoferrazzi
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
plot twist:
it was me, on my mission to tarnish the reputation of the US,
obnoxious comment by obnoxious comment
#121 to #90 - anon id: cc329fea
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
You diabolical bastard. You would have gotten away with it, too, had you not been such an upstanding gentleman!

But maybe that's it. You'll be more polite than Americans! And then they'll love you AND your America-hating slander! YOU'RE A MADMAN AND A GENIUS.
#122 to #121 - teoferrazzi
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
maybe that was the whole plan.
maybe not.
yes.
#9 to #7 - anon id: 0879543c
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/08/2014) [-]
wtf are you retarded or something? fag ass retard stupid dick ass ******* piece of ****
#33 to #9 - sgtxrootbeer
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
jeez man, quit having an anger-gasm
User avatar #15 - travismackie
Reply +94 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Hehe, serves her right for singing with that microphone all the time in the house.
#41 to #15 - tkfourtwoone
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Here, you dropped this
#45 to #15 - mrksx
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
User avatar #68 - niggernazi
Reply -15 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
that is one bigass dildo.

your gf must be a slut
User avatar #74 to #68 - pawnman
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
not a dildo, it just vibrates up against the vagina sending sensations through it.
#71 to #68 - gaminggenus
Reply +28 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Girls need pleasure too mate.
Girls need pleasure too mate.
User avatar #72 to #71 - niggernazi
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
the only pleasure a girl needs is the bible

by shoving it up their vaginas
#73 to #72 - gaminggenus
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Well...
Well...
#105 to #72 - dambusta
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
#146 to #71 - purplegolem
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
This has got to be the most relevant and funny deal with it gif I have ever seen.
#12 - mrbriteside
Reply +21 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
User avatar #34 - doombunni
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Am I the only girl who's slightly terrified of putting something that's plugged into a socket on my vagina?
User avatar #36 to #34 - wellimnotsure
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
it does sound horrifying
User avatar #43 to #34 - articvibe
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
fair enough they have these models that are powered by battery pack probably to help people get around that
User avatar #39 to #34 - calawesome
Reply +19 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
as a guy, i'd be more terrified to find a vagina one morning. when I get out the shower
User avatar #58 to #39 - MonkeyManz
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
wtf do you mean getting out of the shower...you use the toilet before the shower so how would you not notice
#63 to #58 - wanicochil
Reply +10 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
>Not pissing in the shower   
   
Damn casual
>Not pissing in the shower

Damn casual
#109 - Defenestro
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Why would someone do that to a toy microphone?



Yes I know it's not a toy microphone.
#113 to #109 - tyroneisanigger
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I once saw my six year old sister using one of these as a microphone. I laughed until my stomache ached.

I didn't take it away though...
#112 to #109 - albertjester
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
here use this.
#35 - ubbashnubba
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Am I the only one who would be insulted if my partner had a sex toy?
#40 to #35 - anon id: 5982e1a6
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Sometimes it is a good thing.
My girl had a sex toy when I met her. Turns out she had named it the same as I named my penis.

And this is how I met your mother.
User avatar #119 to #40 - omnifish **User deleted account**
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Plot twist: You are not his father.
User avatar #144 to #119 - namnori
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
WAAAAATT you genius! Ted never actually mentions that they are his kids, just tells the story of how he met their mother I could be wrong but I'm completely flabbergasted
#126 to #35 - hemming
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Why the **** would you be insulted by that?
Are you seriously that insecure about your penis?
User avatar #108 to #35 - greatboobya
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I wouldn't give a ****. They don't owe anything to me.
User avatar #111 to #108 - reginleif
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
That comment was so beta, people's penises fell off. :/
User avatar #114 to #111 - greatboobya
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
My existence doesn't suddenly require them to stop doing what they like, that's conceited as ****.
User avatar #110 to #35 - penileburglar
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
It takes a special amount of insecurity to have a problem with your girlfriend having a sex toy.
User avatar #53 to #35 - melwach
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Not the only one, but I don't get it. I guess you also feel insulted if she masturbates?
As long as it's not replacing your mutual sex life I don't see a problem. Some variety doesn't hurt anyone plus you can use it during foreplay or whatever.
#70 to #35 - potatos
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
If my man leaves town for a few days, i still need my candy.
User avatar #169 to #70 - travismackie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
That face and the word "candy" are really disturbing me...
#82 to #35 - downsyndrisachoice
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Why would you?
You masturbate probably too when she's not around...
User avatar #67 to #35 - armsdealer
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I'd rather her have that than someone else if I can't be there.
Long distance relationships suck
User avatar #106 - mymiddleleg
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
If she needs one of them you mustn't be doing a very good job
User avatar #140 to #106 - darkmaker
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
nobody ever does a good enough job
User avatar #142 to #140 - mymiddleleg
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Speak for yourself lol
User avatar #143 to #142 - darkmaker
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
I am, but also for you.
User avatar #148 to #106 - sketchE
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
if i still feel the need to jack off shes not doing her job