How to irritate…. . MN TO IRRITATE... PORSCHE DUDESS SCIENTISTS ENGLISH tlt s IS Arlo A l hits IT' S
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Comments(114):

[ 114 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #6 - worldatarms (08/10/2014) [-]
I don't care how much English Majors get pissed off. I'm still going to call it small, medium, and large
User avatar #99 to #6 - darrensankari (08/11/2014) [-]
Wait, what's so annoying about that?
#31 to #6 - John Cena (08/11/2014) [-]
you have nothing better to do than irritate english majors? hmm how's living with your mom still?
User avatar #89 to #31 - cocopopsonfire (08/11/2014) [-]
he never said he wanted to irritate them you dumb ****
#1 - ohayougozaimasu (08/10/2014) [-]
Why are they penguins?
User avatar #33 to #1 - alphagex (08/11/2014) [-]
Because they are CRitikal thinkers
User avatar #2 to #1 - springbok ONLINE (08/10/2014) [-]
You think that penguins can’t be scientists! RACIST
#3 to #2 - ohayougozaimasu (08/10/2014) [-]
I'm not racist.
Racism is a crime.
And crime...
is for black people.
User avatar #4 to #3 - springbok ONLINE (08/10/2014) [-]
You make a good point! Last year a black family moved into my apartment building and yesterday my wallet went missing. Coincidence? I think not!
User avatar #7 to #3 - richardastley (08/10/2014) [-]
I'm not sexist.
Sexism is wrong,
and being wrong...
is for women!

I heard the racism one before the sexism one.
#18 to #7 - John Cena (08/11/2014) [-]
Marry one and learn the reality of the opposite.
User avatar #40 - scootabot (08/11/2014) [-]
Guys, I'm still pretty early in college, I'm about to take on my second half of my first semester.

I wanted to become an English Teacher.

Should I go through with this **** , or what?
User avatar #45 to #40 - roflnaut ONLINE (08/11/2014) [-]
If you want to become an English teacher, go for it.
Don't let guys on a humor website tell you otherwise.
User avatar #56 to #40 - mrselfdestruct (08/11/2014) [-]
rule 1: don't let a a webcomic make your decisions for you.........
User avatar #57 to #56 - mrselfdestruct (08/11/2014) [-]
**** that extra 'a'
User avatar #64 to #40 - Sethorein (08/11/2014) [-]
Don't wait until you get out of college to try to get connections. Spend your entire university career schmoozing with profs and other useful people who you will only see during your university career.

If you establish connections before graduating you'll be less likely to be stuck working at starbucks.

Same goes for if you're interested in doing anything besides teaching with your english. Wanna do any professional writing? Get involved in clubs for writers in your college.

English majors who do poorly are english majors who didn't apply themselves. The field is less stable than sciences and business, but it still has plenty of opportunity for people who understand how to apply the skills they are taught since english degrees are far more skill based than content based majors... you know... unless you're doing philosophy...
User avatar #67 to #64 - scootabot (08/11/2014) [-]
My sister majored in Philosophy, and now she's being forced to sell her blood to make ends meet.

No thanks.
User avatar #68 to #67 - Sethorein (08/11/2014) [-]
yeah... philosophy, much like classics, is meant for minors, not majors.

I highly suggest trying to be a creative writer. It's something that you can practice in your spare time and won't interfere with your teaching, but will definitely pad your salary well if you end up being published and selling modestly.
User avatar #74 to #40 - languagexplain ONLINE (08/11/2014) [-]
It's not as bad as arts or philosophy majors, but it's a pretty generic degree. I advise you to go trhough with what you want, cause if you'll take a trajectory that doesn't interest you, you'll lose motivation and possibly fail.
User avatar #80 to #40 - nightlynutria (08/11/2014) [-]
***** just because most people dont make it big on that field doesnt mean you cant! There can always be an exception, just get inspired by the right people on your field. The only limitations are the ones you put on yourself...or let anyone else put.

Listen to this guy, forget about success for a second and just follow his advice www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyhOmBPtGNM
User avatar #41 to #40 - ugottanked (08/11/2014) [-]
Do whatever you want to do, that's what i'm aiming for.

college shouldn't be about picking a job with the biggest paycheck, it should be about studying what you love.
User avatar #42 to #41 - scootabot (08/11/2014) [-]
I've ALWAYS enjoyed reading and writing. I write small stories on a daily basis. I've always done well in school with English subjects.

English was my favorite subject to study in School, besides the sciences.
User avatar #44 to #42 - ugottanked (08/11/2014) [-]
English is also my favorite, i write stories, but i cant write them on a daily basis, if i do it just feels...forced yknow? i just need that inspiration, and then i will actually be able to write something

but i dont know, i might go into a double major, because why not
User avatar #46 to #44 - scootabot (08/11/2014) [-]
Well, I've got an aunt who is a teacher at one of the local elementary schools.

She's telling me some great pointers on how to get the job and it'll be something you love.

I was told that I should teach 3rd to 5th grades. All I have to do is know basic math, social studies, and English, and I could teach them all if I wanted.
#69 to #41 - John Cena (08/11/2014) [-]
Great Bate. Subtle yet satisfying.
User avatar #71 to #69 - ugottanked (08/11/2014) [-]
I dont see how deciding to study what you love doing is counted as bait.
User avatar #75 to #71 - scootabot (08/11/2014) [-]
He's been on the internet so long when he sees good advice, he automatically assumes it's an asshole remark or troll-bait.
User avatar #76 to #75 - ugottanked (08/11/2014) [-]
i guess
#15 - ryles (08/11/2014) [-]
mutha. 			******		. penguins.
mutha. ****** . penguins.
User avatar #9 - deltaxomega (08/11/2014) [-]
Argument: Evolution is just a theory.

Response: So is gravity, now go jump off a cliff.
#10 to #9 - John Cena (08/11/2014) [-]
Wait, really?
Gravity has not been proved yet?
#13 to #10 - epicscorpion ONLINE (08/11/2014) [-]
Assuming that "proving" means mathematically or physically quantifying gravity, no. It is still accepted only by the means that all evidence we see points to "yes, gravity".
#12 to #10 - comradewinter ONLINE (08/11/2014) [-]
Certain things in science haven't been directly proven, but it has been determined to be so by what it affects. For example, gravity has been theorized because we can see a connections in weight, drag and altitude, but because gravity doesn't emit any waves that we can observe it remains an invisible theory.
User avatar #11 to #10 - deltaxomega (08/11/2014) [-]
outside of observation, no we have not.
#14 to #9 - exsequor (08/11/2014) [-]
Gravity is a law, not a theory.
User avatar #17 to #14 - ihatem (08/11/2014) [-]
Gravity can't be a law, gravity is explained by the theory of general relativity.
"Things fall when you drop them when you're on Earth" can't be a law, neither can Newton's equation, as it's a mathematical property of gravitational effects.
User avatar #58 to #14 - klaes (08/11/2014) [-]
Gravity is actually still a theory. Not because there's any doubt in how it happens, but because we're not entirely sure why and there's multiple theories describing how it works(quantum vs general relativity, etc.)

The equations governing how two regular objects are attracted to each other can be called a law, but gravity as a collective of how it works AND why it works is still a theory
User avatar #79 to #14 - nightlynutria (08/11/2014) [-]
Uhm its actually both.
There's Newton's law of gravity and Newton's theory of gravity. But it's actually well known that it's not a universal fact, which makes me wonder why is people thumbing you up and not deltaxomega.
User avatar #34 to #14 - mamaluweegee (08/11/2014) [-]
The way I look at it (and it has worked against everything I've tried it on) laws can be broken while theories cannot. You can counteract gravity, but eventually you're coming back down, somewhere.
#96 to #34 - popeflatus (08/11/2014) [-]
Theories can be broken, ie, proven wrong. Take Newton's theory of gravity for example. It was well tested and never shown to be wrong until Einstein came along 100 years ago and showed that there are cases involving large scales and velocities where Newton was wrong. His theory was 'broken'. Laws can be shown to be wrong too.
#59 - Kairyuka ONLINE (08/11/2014) [-]
People who question evolution with horrible arguments
People who question evolution with horrible arguments
#85 to #59 - notapancake (08/11/2014) [-]
But it's just a theory.

AH GEIM THYOREEE
#104 - andovaredoras (08/11/2014) [-]
Creationist's face when you try to prove Evolution to them.
Creationist's face when you try to prove Evolution to them.
User avatar #102 - mrdrpage (08/11/2014) [-]
I feel like a faggot every time I say "Grande" or "Venti" for a drink size at Starbucks.

Come to think of it, I feel like a faggot every time I walk into a Starbucks.
#29 - exclamation (08/11/2014) [-]
Then pronounce Grande as Grand, like a Grand Prix or "grand" in grandiose.
User avatar #103 - acetrainerewan (08/11/2014) [-]
my sister passed english literature after a 3 year course and got a 2 1

for the past 2 years she has worked as a barista in 4 different chains/shops and 6 different shops
User avatar #100 - brothergrimm (08/11/2014) [-]
: Small, Medium, Large : Foamy The Squirrel and that's all i have to say about the last one
#50 - dicewarfare (08/11/2014) [-]
Me being a Porsche owner, I can relate to this. To top it off my dad owns a Camaro and he says Porsche wrong all the time. (Pic is of my 944)
#70 to #50 - catburglarpenis (08/11/2014) [-]
My car will beat up your car.
#54 to #50 - bellbottomshark (08/11/2014) [-]
**bellbottomshark rolled image** Is his Camaro faster than your porsh?
User avatar #109 to #54 - dicewarfare (08/11/2014) [-]
No, my car can Short shift and accelerate faster.
User avatar #86 to #50 - PlagueDoctor (08/11/2014) [-]
I love the 944
User avatar #16 - gandaalf (08/11/2014) [-]
>camaro
>faster than porsche

i dun fink so m8y
User avatar #22 to #16 - firesquire (08/11/2014) [-]
camaro ZL1 is faster the the porsche cayman, so idk its possible
#81 to #22 - guitarexplain (08/11/2014) [-]
And the new Z/28 is even faster. Now is it faster than the high end porches, no, but still well up there.
User avatar #105 to #81 - firesquire (08/11/2014) [-]
im talking more about which ones are closest in price and speed, sure you can spend a 100k on a sweet Porsche and its gonna be faster but the cayman and the zl1 are about the same in price while the zl1 gives you more bang for your buck
User avatar #60 - lemurlemur (08/11/2014) [-]
lets just cut the crap, evolution has been proven. Anybody who doesnt believe it is denying scientific evidence
#65 to #60 - xaumberpauffe (08/11/2014) [-]
Bugger off m8
User avatar #88 to #60 - nimba (08/11/2014) [-]
There's no proof that it is happening, there's no proof yet that it isn't happening
User avatar #101 to #60 - littleliz ONLINE (08/11/2014) [-]
the reason its called the evolutionary theory is because its a theory. it hasnt been proven. its very wrong to say it has since theres still so many missing links. theres still a chance it can be wrong.
User avatar #61 to #60 - theanonguy (08/11/2014) [-]
speaking of crap... I'll always select small, medium or large. **** you Star Money!!!!
User avatar #8 - jonnyp (08/11/2014) [-]
It isn't pronounced "Porsch-eh" its just "Porsche" one syllable. that's how EVERY German says it, even in Stuttgart. you're an ass hat if you say it with 2 syllables.
#62 to #8 - jestersjake (08/11/2014) [-]
What? I'm a native german speaker and it's indeed pronounced with 2 syllables. Do you even know what syllables are? Silben auf deutsch für dich. Por-sche. 2 Silben = syllables.
User avatar #110 to #62 - jonnyp (08/12/2014) [-]
I never heard it pronounced with 2 syllables. Worked at a car shop for 3 years, see them all over and i never heard more than 1 syllables.
#111 to #110 - jestersjake (08/12/2014) [-]
maybe, but it's not correct. in germany/austria/switzerland it's pronounced por-sche (like porshay)
User avatar #112 to #111 - jonnyp (08/12/2014) [-]
Intresting. must be the Hessen dialect then mostly.
#49 - cdroid (08/11/2014) [-]
I'll routinely order a large and then complain when they give me the wrong size (for my own entertainment, I understand exactly how big of a douche I'm being). You see, tall would imply big but it's the smallest. Grande actually means large but it's the medium and Venti is supposed to mean 20, but most of the Venti drinks on the menu are actually 24oz. Then they introduced the Trendi which is supposed to mean 30 but it's actually 31 ounces. The sizes. Make. No. Sense.

More importantly I make a better coffee on my own espresso machine at home (the last few baristas I've seen there hadn't a clue) so I haven't been back in a while cause there's almost always an alternative (even if it's no coffee, sometimes that's the better alternative by the taste of some of the drinks I got from Starbucks).
User avatar #63 to #49 - Sethorein (08/11/2014) [-]
grata, you're a douche...?
#90 to #63 - popeflatus (08/11/2014) [-]
Is that douche with two syllables?
User avatar #55 to #49 - faktopus (08/11/2014) [-]
As someone who works in the food service industry.

"Oh I care about the exact definition of the drink sizes!" ~nobody. ever.

you are the worst kind of customer. we do not get paid enough to put up with your whiny, bitch ass, and if customer service related jobs are the same where you live as myself, we pretty much have to put up with it either way.

So, to fix your **** , here's 3 simple steps to ordering ANYWHERE.
-1: figure out what the **** you want. we don't care why you like it, we don't care what your personal thoughts are, just figure it out. If you have questions, ask them.
-2: tell us what you want. not your ******* life story, just what you ******* want from the menu.
-3: pay the **** up and go away.
#108 to #55 - cdroid (08/11/2014) [-]
I know I'm what you'd consider the worst type of customer. I made it clear that I already know.

I found a simpler step to ordering at Starbucks:
1. Don't. As in Dooooooonnn't ever go to Starbucks.

I piddle around with drinks on average once or twice a week and I can make a better coffee (leaf and all, which is purely aesthetic) than Starbucks. If the baristas who work there every day and make many drinks a day suck at what they do (and I judge them against Pete's and ma and pa places not my own drinks).

Here are a tip to making a good cup of coffee that I learned from a Starbucks barista (who hassn't work there in years) because they used to know this:
Shots you pull go stale in about 10 seconds. If you haven't poured the milk into the shot within a minute then the coffee will taste horrible.
The last few baristas I've had have done something along these lines:
Pull shot
go make a tea or iced drink
pour milk into cup
make another tea or iced drink
go to steam milk and realize there's not enough so go find another gallon
put more milk in the cup and start steaming
go make another tea or iced drink or two
pour the steamed milk into the cup and the shot has been sitting there for no less than 3 minutes and it's the worst coffee I've ever had which is saying something.

If this is the customer service I get, then **** you, and **** your face.
User avatar #77 - languagexplain ONLINE (08/11/2014) [-]
As an english major who's been in this situation, I can usually tell what they mean because I studied human comunication for several years.

0/10 Should have picked art major.
#43 - alphadolan (08/11/2014) [-]
Built not bought    
   
   
 fgget
Built not bought


fgget
#94 to #43 - therealjc (08/11/2014) [-]
So you manually forged every part that's in that car?   
No you bought them from a shop.    
			*******		 hate that saying.
So you manually forged every part that's in that car?
No you bought them from a shop.
******* hate that saying.
#97 to #94 - alphadolan (08/11/2014) [-]
No it's about doing the work yourself and taking pride in what you have built and how far you went to get there.

Not whipping out your ******* wallet and buying something that you have no knowledge of.
User avatar #98 to #97 - therealjc (08/11/2014) [-]
Install one turbo, installed them all, amirite?
But seriously, I understand the meaning behind it.
Just hate the saying.
#39 - John Cena (08/11/2014) [-]
The new Camaro z 28 starts at 79k with 505hp from 7L v8. The Zl1 starts at about 60k and has 580 hp from 6.2l v8 (vette and cts-v engine im guessing).

Porsche cayman starts at 60k and has 275hp and the gts starts at 90k at has 340hp. Both v6.

So the Camaro are probably faster in a straight line, but Porsche would probably keep up in the track.

No doubt Porsche is the nicer car, but GM has some seriously fast cars for decent prices.

only issue is they're GM lol (I own a GM too)
#82 to #39 - guitarexplain (08/11/2014) [-]
The new Z/28 is track focused, not as much looking to do fast 1/4 miles like the days of old, the new Dodge Hellcat Challenger certainly is though.
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