Home Line. so uh, tumblr = thumbs?. i once came home from my morning jog and i went to my door and i coolant find my Keys i retracted my path for are minutes lo
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Home Line

Home Line. so uh, tumblr = thumbs?. i once came home from my morning jog and i went to my door and i coolant find my Keys i retracted my path for are minutes lo

so uh, tumblr = thumbs?

i once came home from my morning jog and i went to my door and i coolant find
my Keys
i retracted my path for are minutes looking for my keys and i ended up try my
door
i unlocked the door and looked in my house for my Keys
i searched tirelessly for another rainy minutes
i called my dad from the home line
Me: hey dad have you seen my keys
Dad: no nathan, I have not
Me: well can you hurry home because Fm locked out
Dad: nathan, what line are you calling from'?
Me: from the-
and that' s the day I my father was done
...
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Views: 47680
Favorited: 71
Submitted: 04/26/2014
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Comments(89):

[ 89 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #1 - tipjar ONLINE (04/26/2014) [+] (3 children)
stickied by mayihavecaps
Patience is key
User avatar #8 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (04/27/2014) [+] (19 replies)
stickied by mayihavecaps
For those wondering how these things happen, it's actually less to do with stupidity and more to do with expectations, and it actually happens very often, including to you (although, probably not in such extreme cases).

Basically, when you make something routine, your brain builds up a pattern, that's HOW you make something habit and routine. However, when you skip something in this habit or routine, or get thrown off track, your brain basically 'shifts' so that you subconsciously notice things the same way you did during your patterns and don't notice how they really are until you consciously realize them (usually by being 'shocked out' of it), so even if you miss a beat, you react as if you didn't.

So, when this guy followed his routine he could have easily just put the keys in a different pocket, breaking it slightly. He's so used to reaching for his regular pocket that he never bothered to check the other one and he thought it got lost when he was really just holding it in his hands. And even WHEN he unlocked the door and got into his house, he still consciously believed he lost the key when he just subconsciously missed a part of the pattern. Get it?

That's how you can walk out of your house and go to school and only realize you're not wearing your backpack when you're half-way there, or how you might break a morning routine and feel like you have to poop when you SWORE you just went an hour or so earlier, or how you go to lock up your work at the end of the day and have to re-do it 5 times because you swear you skip steps each time.

It has nothing to do with actual 'intelligence', but just how well your brain can form and break patterns and have you adapt to it.

#16 - arcticastronaut (04/27/2014) [-]
That last line...
That last line...
#71 to #16 - mrbuzzard (04/27/2014) [-]
He was his own father. And he was done.
He was his own father. And he was done.
#6 - mordenkrad (04/27/2014) [-]
On several occasions I have hung up on calls suddenly after saying "Wait a minute, sorry, can I call you back, I think I just lost my phone"
On several occasions I have hung up on calls suddenly after saying "Wait a minute, sorry, can I call you back, I think I just lost my phone"
#19 to #6 - OldSnake ONLINE (04/27/2014) [-]
#37 - fareastbrainseer (04/27/2014) [-]
"the day I my father was done"
User avatar #2 - thechosentroll (04/26/2014) [-]
I feel like theses are becoming the new greentexts - either utter ******** or proof that it's indeed possible to be too stupid to insult.
User avatar #3 to #2 - mayihavecaps (04/26/2014) [-]
But all the same, they can make you cry in fury or in laughter, nd sometimes in feels
#4 to #2 - vorarephilia (04/27/2014) [-]
**vorarephilia rolled image**
They have always been similar, but it shows the clear difference in how both sites function. greentexts don't need bold because the people who read them are usually more patient and probably have a higher reading comprehension

BUT on the other hand.

>be me
>newfag
>still learning the ropes of greentext
>confused
>MFW i realized ">" served as all linking words and conjunctions
>MFW I realized this meant you could compress a movie script down to a few pages at most.
greentext compresses the information, tumblr bolds important bits . both ways save time for people wasting theirs on the internet.
User avatar #5 to #2 - sladee ONLINE (04/27/2014) [-]
Difference is, most greentexts that get posted here are either funny, feels, cringe or cool storys bro
User avatar #14 to #2 - therealtjthemedic (04/27/2014) [-]
Yes, but greentexts are always funny, or sad.
These are just blogs.
They're just what happened that day.
#41 - Wahoona ONLINE (04/27/2014) [-]
To the tumblr faggot who is OP
To the tumblr faggot who is OP
User avatar #27 - noisia (04/27/2014) [-]
Of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.
User avatar #73 to #27 - KevinPutt (04/27/2014) [-]
Of all the comments that weren't funny the 80th time around...
#57 - rpgamer (04/27/2014) [-]
>Dad's face when
#22 - John Cena (04/27/2014) [-]
SO DONE XDDD
DID U JUST ?!!!
#7 - kaarvaag (04/27/2014) [-]
Even the fathers of tumblr users are done now?
Man **** this ****
#11 - twofreegerbils (04/27/2014) [-]
This is not funny, and if you thumb it up, you should feel ashamed.
#23 to #11 - erotictentacle (04/27/2014) [-]
that's a nice picture you got there
#59 to #23 - twofreegerbils (04/27/2014) [-]
Are you the one who made it? I know I saved it off here just a week or so ago from a comment that was in reply to me.
Are you the one who made it? I know I saved it off here just a week or so ago from a comment that was in reply to me.
#60 to #59 - erotictentacle (04/27/2014) [-]
well, i recently used it after cropping it out, and i haven't seen anyone using any Yamada and the seven witches stuff.

So i guess its mine, but keep using it, at least my small efforts are not in vain!
#76 to #11 - rakoom (04/27/2014) [-]
As if humor is objective and not subjective.

I'll enjoy this, so thank you and have a nice day.
User avatar #26 - JonathanNowFuckYou ONLINE (04/27/2014) [-]
I can guarantee that this isn't true. I will happily place any wager of any kind with anyone to bet that this did not happen. And I would win your money/kidneys because this is not true. Fact.
#32 to #26 - rollinggolem (04/27/2014) [-]
**rollinggolem rolled image**
I bet 20 FJ points. (Didn't want to bet anything of value.)
#46 - metalnettle (04/27/2014) [-]
> At a party ( huge warehouse rave) (admittedly not completely sober)   
> Girl comes up to me, asks help finding her phone   
> I get my phone out for light   
> She explains that a guy has been going around taking people's phones   
> I feel my pocket   
> Phone not there    
> Freak out    
> '' Oh 			****		 he got mine too''   
> Realise phone is in my hand    
> mfw
> At a party ( huge warehouse rave) (admittedly not completely sober)
> Girl comes up to me, asks help finding her phone
> I get my phone out for light
> She explains that a guy has been going around taking people's phones
> I feel my pocket
> Phone not there
> Freak out
> '' Oh **** he got mine too''
> Realise phone is in my hand
> mfw
#39 - saltyfries ONLINE (04/27/2014) [-]
I'm sensing a pattern that people from Tumblr are not aware that they have found said object that they were looking for and continue to find it like idiots...
#25 - mankey (04/27/2014) [-]
What did the opera singer do when she was locked out of the house?   
   
She sang the scales till she found the right key.
What did the opera singer do when she was locked out of the house?

She sang the scales till she found the right key.
#9 - symmiie (04/27/2014) [-]
MFW my name is Nathan.
#20 to #9 - mayihavecaps (04/27/2014) [-]
I am also, OP is also Nathan.
We are all Nathan on FunnyJunk.
Even Phanact
We are all Nathan
And we shall open the gates to ObliviNathan
The Nathan-Nation shall rise
#34 to #20 - rollinggolem (04/27/2014) [-]
**rollinggolem rolled image** I wasn't going to thumb until the last line.
#44 - partysloth (04/27/2014) [-]
REALLY....and i mean REALLY, i know that sometimes you thumb up made up stories because there are funny and...let's say, at some point, believable, i did too.    
   
But this, THIS is too much, how does anybody believes this 			****		 or even thinks that it's funny? come on guys, we are better than this...   
   
To be honest, i don't know if i'm lactating with rage or lactating with disappointment.
REALLY....and i mean REALLY, i know that sometimes you thumb up made up stories because there are funny and...let's say, at some point, believable, i did too.

But this, THIS is too much, how does anybody believes this **** or even thinks that it's funny? come on guys, we are better than this...

To be honest, i don't know if i'm lactating with rage or lactating with disappointment.
#68 - dontknowmeatall (04/27/2014) [-]
How can Tumblrites be completely unable to use punctuation properly but they can use bold and italics so neatly???
User avatar #69 to #68 - mayihavecaps (04/27/2014) [-]
I see only one instance where punctuation is needed and has not been used.
#70 to #69 - dontknowmeatall (04/27/2014) [-]
couldn't
hey,
dad,
keys?
no,
well,
home?
All capital letters and periods.
User avatar #72 to #70 - mayihavecaps (04/27/2014) [-]
"Hey dad," is acceptable.
So is " No nathan,"
"Well can" is also
Capital letters =/= punctuation
I think the periods may be excusable since they are rather large text breaks between each senetnce
#33 - OldSnake ONLINE (04/27/2014) [-]
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