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Giraffe story

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Views: 14977
Favorited: 3
Submitted: 11/13/2013
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User avatar #4 - lorithilio (11/14/2013) [-]
OP, I'm gonna say "cool story, bro" in a minute. I just wanted to warn you, and make sure you understood I'm not being sarcastic or mean. It really was a cool story, and I'm glad you got to pet a giraffe. That sounds pretty awesome.

Okay, here goes.

Cool story, bro.
#3 - Muppetz (11/14/2013) [-]
#12 - acksl (11/14/2013) [-]
Everytime I see giraffes at the zoo:   
   
Me: Damn they're huge!   
Brain: Yes and we've known that since we were like 3 years old.   
Me: Yeah but just look at it, I could walk right under it and I wouldn't even have to duck. It would look like a giant giraffe hat.   
Brain: Yes but we now this remember? Giraffes have always been huge and we've seen these exact giraffes for the like 15th time! Because we constantly went to the zoo when we were younger.   
Me: And it's not like I'm small I'm 1,88 m   
Brain: I'M YOUR BRAIN YOU 						*******					 TARD I KNOW HOW TALL WE ARE!!!!   
Me: Did you know humans and giraffes have the same amount of vertebrae? Let's look for someone to tell him this fun fact.   
Brain: Did YOU know your tongue doesn't fit comfortably in your mouth?   
Me: .... 						****					 you.   
Brain: Well 						****					 you too you dumbass.   
Me: You're my brain, you're the one making me dumb.   
Brain: Hey easy there, let's just be civil here and stop arguing. Do you want a beer?   
Me: Yes please.   
   
Liver: I 						*******					 hate you guys...
Everytime I see giraffes at the zoo:

Me: Damn they're huge!
Brain: Yes and we've known that since we were like 3 years old.
Me: Yeah but just look at it, I could walk right under it and I wouldn't even have to duck. It would look like a giant giraffe hat.
Brain: Yes but we now this remember? Giraffes have always been huge and we've seen these exact giraffes for the like 15th time! Because we constantly went to the zoo when we were younger.
Me: And it's not like I'm small I'm 1,88 m
Brain: I'M YOUR BRAIN YOU ******* TARD I KNOW HOW TALL WE ARE!!!!
Me: Did you know humans and giraffes have the same amount of vertebrae? Let's look for someone to tell him this fun fact.
Brain: Did YOU know your tongue doesn't fit comfortably in your mouth?
Me: .... **** you.
Brain: Well **** you too you dumbass.
Me: You're my brain, you're the one making me dumb.
Brain: Hey easy there, let's just be civil here and stop arguing. Do you want a beer?
Me: Yes please.

Liver: I ******* hate you guys...
User avatar #1 - lordfluffs ONLINE (11/13/2013) [-]
That was a nice story OP, I too want to pet a giraffe someday.
#25 - matralith (11/14/2013) [-]
''So ******* cool.''
#23 - willindor (11/14/2013) [-]
TFW no giraffe
#9 - babyraper (11/14/2013) [-]
i like giraffes and horses
i like giraffes and horses
User avatar #2 - dashgamer (11/13/2013) [-]
I know your girlfriend has a bit of a long neck and is good at blowjobs, but it is still very rude to call her a giraffe.
#18 - mattdoggy ONLINE (11/14/2013) [-]
>Go to a small little park when i was kid with my class   
>few carnival style rides there and a half dozen cool animals   
>nothing big but i was like 6 so it was amazing   
>we leave the park to have lunch in the parking lot where they have a few picnicking tables   
>in the parking lot we see a man standing by a big barn looking thing who motions us over   
>what could go wrong with little boys and girls going into a barn with an adult stranger   
>when we get there he points us up some steps to a platform which we do   
>at the top we see them   
>giraffes    
>none of that "the giraffe needs to only be able to reach the persons hands to eat a carrot" crap the they have these days   
>we could have ridden those sluts if we wanted   
>they chewed on our clothes and hair and one gave me a cow/giraffe lick for my hair   
>years later i've gone back and they moved the giraffes back into the park and you have to lean over some rail to barely be able to hand them a 5 dollar carrot   
>but i can say that i've been licked by a giraffe
>Go to a small little park when i was kid with my class
>few carnival style rides there and a half dozen cool animals
>nothing big but i was like 6 so it was amazing
>we leave the park to have lunch in the parking lot where they have a few picnicking tables
>in the parking lot we see a man standing by a big barn looking thing who motions us over
>what could go wrong with little boys and girls going into a barn with an adult stranger
>when we get there he points us up some steps to a platform which we do
>at the top we see them
>giraffes
>none of that "the giraffe needs to only be able to reach the persons hands to eat a carrot" crap the they have these days
>we could have ridden those sluts if we wanted
>they chewed on our clothes and hair and one gave me a cow/giraffe lick for my hair
>years later i've gone back and they moved the giraffes back into the park and you have to lean over some rail to barely be able to hand them a 5 dollar carrot
>but i can say that i've been licked by a giraffe
User avatar #29 - mrshrapnel (11/14/2013) [-]
Listen here ****** .
Im a zookeeper and i get to do this often.
And its not as fun as it seems at times.
#27 - radeckal ONLINE (11/14/2013) [-]
#20 - aguywithlonghair (11/14/2013) [-]
This image has expired
Loved the story, OP.
User avatar #15 - hyeroshi (11/14/2013) [+] (1 reply)
During my time in high school there was a promise from the school that every senior year there would be a field trip to the local zoo where you could pet animals. It just so happened that I was in my junior year and the seniors were off on their field trip and one of the students didn't like giraffes, so when it was his chance to pet it he punched it in the face. The dude punched a goddamned giraffe.

To say the least, I never did get to go to the zoo my senior year.
User avatar #10 - xtwinblade (11/14/2013) [-]
this story confuses me... so did you let the giraffe eat from your hand? and why does the story end on such a weird note? You went to go pet a giraffe, well did something happen, did you bail or actually pet it. its like ending a story by saying "I went to my car"

This has me more confused than it should be allowed to be.
User avatar #31 - sarcasticrunner (11/14/2013) [-]
Sounds like someone from Northern Alabama who is trying to make it sound better.
User avatar #30 - ninjaawesomeface (11/14/2013) [-]
They have something like that at the zoo in Springfield, MO
User avatar #28 - Riukanojutsu ONLINE (11/14/2013) [+] (3 replies)
sarcasticrunner
User avatar #24 - chuffberry (11/14/2013) [-]
i am a giraffe keeper. be jealous. the baby giraffe likes to wrap her tongue around my ponytail and follow me around as i work.
User avatar #6 - whothefkisanon (11/14/2013) [-]
I can confirm OPs story. I got to pet a giraffe in SA. Those animals are just amazing. Another great experience was being close to the lions in a game park. We were so close to them we could have petted them.
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