he-lo dark-ness my old friend(7)
iv'e come to talk to you again(7)
be-cause a vi-sion soft-ly creep-ing(9)
left its seeds while i was sleep-ing(8)
and the vi-sions that was plant-ed in my brain(11)
still re-mains(3)
with-in the sounds of si-lence(7)

he-lo gay re-tard my old friend(8)
iv'e come to talk to you again(7)
be-cause a lack-of-vi-sion soft-ly creep-ing(11)
left its re-tard seeds while i was sleep-ing(10)
and the vi-sions im-plant-ed in my brain(10)
Still re-main(3)
with-in a gay re-tard(6)

Doesn't fit at all. i give it a 1/10, as some of them have the right syllable count. It could have easily been fixed by making it:
"he-lo re-tard my old friend(7)
Iv'e come to talk to you again(7)
be-cause a lack-of-vis-ion creep-ing(9)
left re-tard seed on me sleep-ing(9)
and the vi-sion that was plant-ed in my brain(11)
still re-mains(3)"