Endless Circle. Credit to For Lack of a Better Comic. In i' alh' Hana Hm! Lamkat" atilla@ Mita Haw: AEE' anailea ' FER he To HIRE fan can mun ERR: TTH Endless Circle Credit to For Lack of a Better Comic In i' alh' Hana Hm! Lamkat" atilla@ Mita Haw: AEE' anailea ' FER he To HIRE fan can mun ERR: TTH
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[ 138 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
User avatar #2 - thechosentroll
Reply -55 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Just volunteer somewhere, *******.
#4 to #2 - lolollo
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Yeah! That'll pay the bills

Brilliant!
#47 to #4 - Lintutu
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
heres the gif version
heres the gif version
User avatar #12 to #4 - noblexfenrir
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Yeah that's a way to look at it, or you could see the time invested in procuring experience in the field in one way or another as an investment to help get a job in the future.
User avatar #15 to #12 - lolollo
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I can make all sorts of safe bets for the future. Hell, me being in school is supposed to be a safe bet for the future.

But the apartment complex that currently shelters me while I'm going to that school has a tendency to want their money when they want it, not when I can promise it in the future.
User avatar #17 to #15 - noblexfenrir
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
That's all good and well, I rent out apartments so trust me I know it's not a game and even more so I'm glad your one of the few people who actually realize you have to pay your bills. (Surprisingly not a common trait nowadays.)

The point was though, during these times employers are going to be requiring more and more education and experience because of things like minimum wage and other government ordered benefits. Teenagers and young adults need to learn what they need to do to be able to be successful. One of those things is gaining a broad range of work experience early, whether through internships, volunteer work, community work, day job centers, etc.
User avatar #19 to #17 - lolollo
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I have plenty of work experiences. I have some petty sign waving experience, which isn't much, and just recently I landed a "job" working back in the kitchen of some bar and grill, and most of all I have military training and service under my belt. I'm plenty experienced.

Do you know what the issue is?

I walk into an interview for something that loves be because of my military service: "We need you for full time, if you can't work full time, we can't hire you."

I walk into an interview for a small, part time job making sandwiches: "Your military service is impressive and all, but unless you have experience making sandwiches, we can't hire you."

That's the **** I deal with.
User avatar #21 to #19 - noblexfenrir
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Why did you feel it necessary to put job in quotes? Are you somehow insinuating that it isn't dignified to be called such? Because that's something I find incredibly ridiculous.

"I walk into an interview for something that loves be because of my military service: "We need you for full time, if you can't work full time, we can't hire you." "

I thank you and appreciate your service whichever it may have been, but they need someone for a specific task and time slot. You can't fulfill that need, why are they the problem?

"I walk into an interview for a small, part time job making sandwiches: "Your military service is impressive and all, but unless you have experience making sandwiches, we can't hire you." "

You are aware you can apply non-retail experience right? I'm pretty sure you've made food by yourself before.

Again, thank you for your service but it isn't a "get a job for anything" free card. You still need experience in the specific field you're going for. I own a construction business, do you think I hire absolutely anyone who can't show me they know what they're doing? I don't ask for specific job experience though, I accept at-home work that shows evidence of their skills, it especially helps if they come with all the tools required because it gives indication they know how to use them.

Why is it so absurd to you that employers want qualified employees?
User avatar #23 to #21 - lolollo
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Please don't be that guy who tries to guilt me when I mention my military experience. I mention it because it's experience, not because I expect it to guaruntee me a job. It's experience I can put down in the "prior work experience field". And I'm glad you're so optimistic about how liberal you can get in what you can call "experience", but if I were to take that "I've made food by myself" bit to anyone, they'd laugh me out the door. I know because it's happened, he thought I was joking and then insisted that I have experience at another restaurant of the exact same type if I wanted to get hired. It makes me wonder what the **** it takes to get hired at that place in the first place!

And I call it a "job" because the managers are still unsure what the hell they're doing with schedules. They're constantly scheduling people for times they explicitly said they wouldn't be available to work, saying "Oh, alright, we'll fix it!" and then just copy pasting the same schedule for every week, week after week. Last week, I needed six days off for a mission with my unit (site security + new years) and it was great that they gave it to me (not that they'd legally have a choice in the matter) but then they copied that week I had off for this week...and they'll probably do it again next week.

If I didn't do anything about it, like I have to constantly do, I wouldn't work there...not really. I'd be on the payroll, and in their books, but if I never showed up to that place again no one would notice, because I would never be scheduled to work...ever.

Tell me how that's proper business ethics.
User avatar #26 to #23 - noblexfenrir
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I'm in no way trying to pull guilt over you, it is experience, so rightfully so you should be able to put it down. But you do realize that it isn't experience that translates into all fields correct? Don't get me wrong, the majority of it is incredibly supplementary experience, especially going for any kind of leadership position, but you need primary experience as well for it to support.

"they'd laugh me out the door. I know because it's happened, "
Did you phrase it as "I've made food for myself"? Because yeah, that doesn't work lol. I've never had a problem putting down personal experience as work experience, I do however notice a difference in how we phrase it, (if you did write it as such). Back in high school when I was mass applying everywhere I didn't write it so casually, I wrote that I had previous food preparation experience, working with large amounts of people requesting different items, etc. I mean these were simply dinners I made/helped make for my family and friends, but how you word it is incredibly important.

"And I call it a "job" because the managers are still unsure what the hell they're doing with schedules. "
Ah I thought you put it in quotes for others reasons. Anyways, I agree with you, they are running their business in a ****** fashion if that's how they conduct themselves. So no, it isn't proper business ethics, and I'm assuming it's a chain store otherwise I don't see how they're in business. ******* hate people who buy into chain businesses because they can be complete ******** and still pull in barely enough profit to scrape by, by brand name alone.
User avatar #28 to #26 - lolollo
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I understand that military experience doesn't translate into every field, but when the guy at subway looks down at me because I don't have "official subway sandwich making experience" it gets on my nerves. And how I word it is that I've had to make my own meals for the last 2-3 years since moving out of the house, but that factoid never seems to impress anyone.
User avatar #5 to #4 - thechosentroll
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Your options:
a) Keep failing job interviews, because you don't have any experience.
b) Volunteer and get experience. You'll still get paid, by the way. Just far less.
c) Stay at home and bitch about it on the internet.

One of these options seems more profitable than the rest.
User avatar #6 to #5 - lolollo
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
You don't quite get what volunteering is, do you?
User avatar #7 to #6 - thechosentroll
Reply -8 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
There's programs and **** where the government covers your wages instead of the employer, so you're making minimal wage without it costing the employer a cent. I refuse to believe that my ********* of a third world country has employment plans like those, yet 'murica doesn't.
User avatar #8 to #7 - lolollo
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
You really refuse to believe that? That's really so unbelievable?

The closest I've gotten to not officially being employed by someone, yet still getting paid, was when I was a sign waiver for some place where the guy would pay me $20 to wave signs at people for the 3 hours that encompassed the lunch rush. It was a pretty stable gig, and the guy running the business was awesome.

Other than that, you're either lying on your resume about experience, or risking financial issue volunteering at some place because no one else will hire you under the pretenses that they'll only hire people who have already been working there. It really is that retarded. The only way I got the job I have right now is that the place was just opening, so they had to staff the whole building, and even then they're cutting hours left and right, wherever they can.

I was required to take a week off one week for the military, and they went ahead and copy pasted the week I had off onto the week after. What's worse is they'll probably do it again for next week, unless I go in and put my foot up somebody's ass like I've had to do for the last 4 months just get the mediocre hours I had before my big army mission.

The truth is plain and simple, almost every single business owner in the country has got their head so far up their ass they can smell their own breakfast, and they're justifying all of it under the guise of "good business." Is it good business to hire someone with experience over someone who might need their initial experience? Probably, but it's not very insightful for the long run, now is it?
User avatar #9 to #8 - thechosentroll
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Wow, ****. Wait, doesn't the government do something about it? I mean, at least around here it offers tax breaks to employers who hire graduates and other inexperienced workers. Plus, a lot of companies like picking up students and training them, so when the student graduates, they're instantly hired. The company gets an experienced employee that knows their way around and can be trusted, while the student gets an instant job. Then again, it's not all that important to get a job instantly, since you can pay off your university education by working minimal wage for the duration.

Where exactly are you from? Because I'm from Bulgaria a.k.a. Europes' asshole. You're telling me that my country, officially the poorest ******** in all of Europe, ****** over by every organization to ever exist, the country sharing the first spot with Romania for the worst gypsy infestation, the country with the lowest wages and life standard in all of Europe and half of Asia and the only third world country on the continent, has better employment programs?
User avatar #14 to #9 - lolollo
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
The government does do stuff, and does have some things in place to help people like me, but if you listen to what the rest of society tells you, you're not allowed to accept any of them. You can't take unemployment or welfare, because then you're just a liberal leech on the system. You can't complain about how you can't get a job, because then people tell you that you should've done better in college (despite the fact that I'm still in college. I have plenty of full time opportunities for AFTER college, but until then I have a year and a half of rent, food, and utilities to consider.)

It's not just where I am to (the midwest), it's like that almost everywhere. It's ingrained in our culture, and I can't ******* stand it.
User avatar #93 to #14 - viperish
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
So you're too proud to accept any outside help? You're worried what your parents or friends are gonna say?

To me, if my parents or friends had me rather live on the street than accept money that's legally mine to take I would feel obligated to tell them to go **** themselves.
User avatar #95 to #93 - lolollo
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
That's precisely how I feel, and I'd take those in a heartbeat over turning up homeless, but chances are, as bleak as things are, that's still a rather dire option to end up having to accept. I do still have a job, even though it's only "technically" so and requires constant babysitting just to have it pay off, the military is still giving me a monthly paycheck, though meager given how it's just a weekend at a time, and in the end, my parents are still the type to bend over backwards to help me out. They've made it clear that they're more than willing to soak up some of my rent if the situation called for it, and that I'd always be welcome to move back in, though the whole "they live 8-10 hours away" thing might scramble my livelihood a bit.

And as for not wanting outside help, it's less a manner of "I'd rather go homeless!" and more a manner of the fact that I'm actively trying to finantial independence, and anything that would be a step back from that is just depressing.
#3 to #2 - shareacokewith [OP]
Reply +110 123456789123345869
(01/09/2014) [-]
Bitch, I've been in work since I was 15, and I've never had any trouble getting a job, but I know so many people who complain about this sort of thing and I thought the comic was funny. *******.
#38 to #3 - ventriloquist
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
mfw I was 15 and no one hire me cause muh work laws
#44 - TomHamilton
Reply +70 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
#31 - hugsta
Reply +55 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I recently got my first proper job (the kind that pays taxes) working at a relatively fancy restaurant with no prior experience. It was actually really easy to get an interview.   
The secret to getting an interview is  To make sure your half-sister is the manager of the restaurant
I recently got my first proper job (the kind that pays taxes) working at a relatively fancy restaurant with no prior experience. It was actually really easy to get an interview.
The secret to getting an interview is To make sure your half-sister is the manager of the restaurant
User avatar #103 to #31 - wizzerdofaus
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
ah i see that's the trick
User avatar #84 to #31 - midnightglass
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
well **** i've been looking for a job in all the wrong places then
User avatar #94 to #31 - disniggahere
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
It's not about what you know, but who you know
User avatar #104 to #31 - pwnigator
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
You little ****, I thought... I don't have a ******* clue, what I expected.
#105 to #31 - widsquard
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Actual good tip to getting a job a restaurant apply before the restaurant opens, thats when they are desperate for employees
#139 to #31 - anon id: 6d2feb31
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/17/2015) [-]
dam that move i cant remember the name of it e.e
User avatar #140 to #139 - hugsta
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/17/2015) [-]
nisemonogatari?
User avatar #25 - FunkMastaNickyNick
Reply +15 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
This is especially bad in my town, where for some reason, the only jobs that companies are hiring for is management positions, to which they specify you must have experience with their company already to even bother applying.
#30 to #25 - GuardianofzeBlind
Reply -6 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
> get job
> kick ass at it
> move up the ladder
> be aggressive and opportunistic
> ???
> management positions!
-quit being a little bitch and go WIN!-
User avatar #48 to #30 - FunkMastaNickyNick
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Right, now how does that work when it has to be a job within the company for the experience to apply towards the management position, and they won't hire anything other than management? Or did you conveniently overlook that little detail?
#126 to #48 - GuardianofzeBlind
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I'll drink my own peepee
#40 - crowsnest
Reply +13 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Want a job? Practice your interviewing skills.    
   
Ask anyone you know in a management position to interview you. Learn what makes an employer happy and for god sakes STUDY THE COMPANY BEFORE YOU GO TO THE INTERVIEW. If you walk in already having some knowledge of the company (founders, goals, strategic values) and great employee skills (social ability, relatedness, and eager for work) it is REALLY hard for an employer to say no to you even if you do not have the experience necessary.   
  just because it's hard for them to say no, does not mean they won't    
   
protip: When you are nervous, don't say Uhhh or Umm. Instead either say "Well..." or just shut your mouth until a useful word comes out. It will make you sound MUCH more intelligent.   
   
Source: me  I give interviews all of the time for my company. Its crazy how people don't know how to talk during these things.
Want a job? Practice your interviewing skills.

Ask anyone you know in a management position to interview you. Learn what makes an employer happy and for god sakes STUDY THE COMPANY BEFORE YOU GO TO THE INTERVIEW. If you walk in already having some knowledge of the company (founders, goals, strategic values) and great employee skills (social ability, relatedness, and eager for work) it is REALLY hard for an employer to say no to you even if you do not have the experience necessary.
just because it's hard for them to say no, does not mean they won't

protip: When you are nervous, don't say Uhhh or Umm. Instead either say "Well..." or just shut your mouth until a useful word comes out. It will make you sound MUCH more intelligent.

Source: me I give interviews all of the time for my company. Its crazy how people don't know how to talk during these things.
User avatar #54 to #40 - hawaiianhappysauce
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
You forgot about lying. Lying and putting tons of emphasis on that internship you did one summer. If they ask if you know Python, you say yes. If they ask if you have experience doing anything you say yes. If you don't have experience doing something, you are off the list.
#58 to #54 - crowsnest
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I'm gonna have to disagree with that. I never lie well, i don't to the best of my ability. . And not having experience is not a game changer. HR does the hiring for most companies. If the HR's ******** detector goes off, you are not getting the job. Also most companies acknowledge that whoever they hire, they are going to have to train. They want people who will respect the position and they believe can be a quick assimilation. Experience is needed in management and upper level positions, but I can tell you that entry level positions are much more about a workers ability, and not his "useful" experience.

That being said, every job is different, and every company has different hiring practices, but what I said previously will help you in ANY interview. Lying wont.
User avatar #98 to #58 - hawaiianhappysauce
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Maybe for entry level jobs that are not STEM jobs. But jobs in Math, Science, Engineering, and CS are looking for results (unless you are a woman because affirmative action laws).
User avatar #113 to #40 - keeganembry **User deleted account**
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
It's going to be a little while before I get a job, because I'm not eligible yet. But one of my worst problems is social awkwardness, and I just can't talk to people without getting nervous. Any tips on how to overcome this? I'd appreciate help, mate.
#127 to #113 - crowsnest
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Just practice interviews over and over. Want a real challenge? Ask a girl you like to help you practice interviews. If she says no she's probly a bitch and doesn't deserve you anyway. If she says ok (which she should because you are just a friend asking for a study buddy right *wink**wink*) then that will make the interviews even harder to keep calm during.

It takes time but practice is key for anything social. It took me 2 years of college before I could talk to a girl without ******** out my internal organs, but now I'm "one of the most bubbly guys I know" according to an entire sorority pledge class. (I know it sounds like ****, but hey that changes nothing)

Just throw yourself in the fire, and take in everything you can. That's how I did it, and it has seriously changed my life. Pic not related.
User avatar #136 to #127 - keeganembry **User deleted account**
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Thank you for the advice, I've never really known anyone who could give good advice, so I usually turn to FJ for help. But sure! I'll try that. First I'll have to gather the courage to even talk to a person of the opposite gender. But anyways, I really appreciate it!
#137 to #136 - crowsnest
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
No problem! Any time dude, I love helpin people out!
User avatar #60 to #40 - freemanareso
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
So I shouldn't tell them the truth to this question?: "Why do you want to work here"? I generally say something like this: "I want to work here because i'm planning on going to college and supporting my family, so I need a job to accomplish this".
#70 to #60 - crowsnest
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
There's nothing wrong with that. It is actually a very promising answer. Just rephrase your answer to something like: I want to work here because I am trying to make a difference. I am trying to better myself and the ones around me, and I would like to think that I can do the same for your business in the process.

Managers love to be talked about. If you can turn any question around into making their business better, for them, they will eat it up.
User avatar #75 to #70 - freemanareso
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Thanks, I just try to be as honest as I can, because I believe people find honest to be one of the top tier of qualities. Hopefully I can get a job soon because I can feel in my gut bad times are ahead if I don't. Have a nice day/night.
#83 to #75 - crowsnest
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
My dad taught me one rule growing up. Liars, cheaters, and thieves are the worst kinds of people in the world. If you can prove that you are not those things, people will respect you. I appreciate your honesty!!   
   
My best advice is have someone sit in front of you and ask you questions over and over until it is a second nature. My mother used to type up a resume and walk into my room, turn of my xbox and say "here's your resume, this is the company you are applying for, go". If I didn't get the job, I wasn't allowed to play xbox the rest of the night. Set up something to that extent where someone holds you accountable and gives you surprise interviews. It doesn't matter what the questions are. Practice is practice.   
   
Good luck!
My dad taught me one rule growing up. Liars, cheaters, and thieves are the worst kinds of people in the world. If you can prove that you are not those things, people will respect you. I appreciate your honesty!!

My best advice is have someone sit in front of you and ask you questions over and over until it is a second nature. My mother used to type up a resume and walk into my room, turn of my xbox and say "here's your resume, this is the company you are applying for, go". If I didn't get the job, I wasn't allowed to play xbox the rest of the night. Set up something to that extent where someone holds you accountable and gives you surprise interviews. It doesn't matter what the questions are. Practice is practice.

Good luck!
User avatar #52 - WHATTHEPISSTRAINE
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Easiest way to get an entry level job. Know two people who work at any place befrend them both, Get them to put in the good word for you. I say two because In case no positions are open after a few weeks. Kill one of them and tell no one
User avatar #29 - myaccountisnew
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I can relate. After a full year of searching, I finally got lucky and got a job recently, and while it's not much, it's way better than unemployment.

Still, all the places that never called back or anything got really frustrating.
User avatar #88 - fourtwentt
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Wtf is with all these job posts today, i don't wanna spend my entire shift looking at such posts
User avatar #49 - Yojimbo
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
"Sorry, you don't have enough experience. But we will be hiring the druggie jackass whose friend is the manager's son."
User avatar #22 - Hybricide
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I know that volunteering will count as experience, but for people with kids, you just don't have time to waste doing work for no money.
User avatar #32 to #22 - gammajk
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
If you have kids and have absolutely no work experience, you're a ******* moron
User avatar #34 to #32 - Hybricide
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
I never said "absolutely no work experience".

What if you're trying to get a job better than the one you have? Nobody has experience in EVERYTHING.
User avatar #62 to #34 - jubbehhh
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
The real question is why the hell would you have kids when you're not even financially stable?
User avatar #130 to #62 - Hybricide
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Accidents happen, rape happens. **** happens. Not everyone is so lucky to get to choose.
User avatar #131 to #130 - jubbehhh
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Get an abortion, simple as that. If you don't want a legal abortion, get an ILLEGAL abortion.
User avatar #134 to #131 - Hybricide
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Not everyone believes in abortion. Or even if they do, not everyone could live with themselves afterwords.
User avatar #135 to #134 - jubbehhh
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(01/10/2014) [-]
Either they can't live with themselves, or they can't afford to live.