D&D Stories #4. High Impact Sexual Violence.jpeg. been years since We played , but anyway, the first time I ever played any form of RPG/ Tabletop was in - Pplay
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D&D Stories #4

High Impact Sexual Violence.jpeg

been years since We played , but anyway, the first time I ever played any form of RPG/ Tabletop was in -
Pplaying a monk
Paarty is made up of several bizarre characters
Twighlight being a Polar Clearcoat was enchanted to lactate pure alcohol. while being immune to it' s effects
character is at some point infected by a poison which brings on total insanity at random intervals. and unvarying severity
Anywho,
Chalking through forest. our group is looking for a treasure of some kind
Agroup finds a box being sold by a roadside beggar. among underthings
matches description map container
ethic buy it. and immediately start arguing whithered open the box ohwait until we can get a professional to span it (Apparently. the box was cursed)
GGM passes me a note
Roll for Insanity."
**** ."
33 93543
underlie table. only GM and I looking
Unatural one
GGM starts laughing hysterically
At this point, the group is wondering what is happening - The GM is midway between laughing and fretting, and neither of us is sure what will happen.
GGM asks me to roll a " with each number representing a different state bginsanity/ behaviour
Murderous Rage"
starts attacking one ofthe other party members . beating the absolute christ out of him and him
WHAT THE **** ANON"
Because I rolled a one, the GM simply says "Look, you - Roll the DE again-"
Theoden weren't, jpg
the DE again
scour
Suicidal Psychosis"
GGC) GM
attacks most powerful of attacks. GM asks me to roll for severity ofthe attack
uses Flurry of Fists orwhatever it is. directly in his own crotch
Drolls 3 DB' s for damage
AARE YOU ******* ME
In the space of about thirty seconds, my party went from talking to a beggar, to having the monk cave the rogue' s face in, and then kill
himself by punching himself in the dick so hard, he died of shock.
first ever DELI character died of Serler/ FY:] Critical Groin Trauma
...
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Views: 27116
Favorited: 84
Submitted: 07/11/2014
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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#4 - mrbobert (07/12/2014) [+] (4 replies)
Glorious, Keep these coming. I've always had trouble finding good D&D greentexts
#1 - pepperoni ONLINE (07/11/2014) [+] (1 reply)
hilarious, have my +1
User avatar #9 - malific (07/12/2014) [+] (2 replies)
We really need a channel for these.
User avatar #15 - sirbearington (07/12/2014) [+] (1 reply)
GROWL, ROAR, GROWL. GRRRR HRRFT GROWLROR GRRN HFFT HFFT.
User avatar #6 - deliciousdee ONLINE (07/12/2014) [+] (4 replies)
I DM'd a Warhammer Fantasy RP campaign at one point. One of my players was playing a Skaven (rat person) wizard and singlehandedly managing to break each and every session with his ridiculous antics and magic rolls.
So naturally I threw a wrench into his magical gears: an aether storm, a natural event that causes magic to backfire.

I even warned him what was going on and he started casting anyways. First time he tried to cast a cantrip. It worked but he gave himself a severe headache.
The second time he cast a spell it simply fizzled, confusing the rat greatly.
But the third time, oh lord. He crit failed his roll and sent enough arcane energies spiking through his body to kill an elephant. The healer managed to keep him alive but his character was out cold for the rest of the session.

He was a bit more careful with his magic after that.
User avatar #13 - discord (07/12/2014) [+] (4 replies)
is there a way to play dnd online? I've never played and am curious.
User avatar #11 - misterblack (07/12/2014) [-]
My first character was a Selkath Noble in the Star Wars tabletop. Heir to a large kolto empire (this campaign was some KOTOR **** ), he probably should have been a well educated, business-savvy dude. Nope, I played him as a complete ******* retard.

> be turned bisexual after a close encounter with a Twilek man-whore's junk in a oneshot
> drop a cave on the entire party in another oneshot (we are kill)
> earn the strange hatred of my family (mom's a cunt, dad doesn't do much, sister is also a cunt)

The only redeeming factors were the fact that I had a Corellian YT-1300 (the Millennium Falcon) and I made precisely one successful business deal, which somehow quickly turned into the Black Sun gaining control of half the hospitals on Coruscant, all aided by my family's kolto.
User avatar #7 - Nihatclodra ONLINE (07/12/2014) [-]
******* lol, that's a new one!
#8 - anonymous (07/12/2014) [-]
i thought we played rpg like idiots but these stories are stupid as ****
> roll under table but gm instantly tell everyone by laughing
> gm laugh at a situation dice and he made basically his own joke
> roll 1 on the insanity check will then later fail the attack and made a reroll on the check again, basically reverse time

> guy have to use skills and roll attack to hit himself instead of just saying "i kill myself" ******* stupid, there is even a rule you can kill helpless characters without rolling, suicidal not going to punch himself
> polar bear
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