Chatroulette Penis Song

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philskimbosh

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Back in the day I tried this original song several other times, but there were too many variables (puppeting, running the audio, glancing at the lyrics) for my brain to deal with, so despite this guy being all laggy (he can still hear what is going on) and not too much to look at in the reaction department, it still ended up being my best "performance" for doing this live. My hubris strike me down: I am rather proud of the lyrics, which is why I share this with you in webm form.

Tags: puppets | Penis | song | chatroulette

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Views:	23306
Favorited:	24
Submitted:	11/07/2015

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#1 - philskimbosh [OP](11/07/2015) [-]

I've seen so many penises on Chatroulette today,
I've seen so many penises I might as well be gay.

When we are clicking next we are taking that horrible chance
that our future random partner will be a partner-sans-pants.

The process for these penile pair ups is really quite a laugh,
Chatroulette calls it, "Spinning The Wheel" but I call it "Getting The Shaft!"

Testicles from Turkey
Cocks from Kazakhstan
Little dicks from Denver
And peckers from Pakistan

Penises from all over the word have taken root and I fear
That we won't be any logical reason for us to even be here!

(Humdiddle)

I don't want to sound like a complete microphone hog
but step the **** back, give me some breathing room, dog.
I'm the Super Sonic Foxomatic Auto Jimmy Rustler,
I don't subscribe to Playboy but occasionally flip through Hustler.

There seems to be an online random chat penis brigade.
I can only assume it is the only way that some of these dudes get laid.
And even there, who gives a **** ? Who gives a **** about that?
Just be honest with yourself Chatroulette, and call yourself "Penis Chat."

And don't even get me started on Chatroulette's alleged "Safe Mode,"
I've felt safer holding uranium rods by the armload.
I bet you if they broadcast Chatroulette in to outer space,
I'd end up with some alien triple-cosmic-penis in my face.

Funky fuzz on hairy nuts and too many weird shots of hairy butts,
People pooping in a cup and scary tranny super-sluts
These are some of the things on Chatroulette I've seen today, it's true,
But apparently it is the only thing that this stupid dog wants to do.