I say mothatrucka because ************ seems too harsh to be put in the title. Rest assured, the unofficial title shall henceforth be referred to as Blacklight Phone ************ . Not to be confused, or affiliated with, ************ Jones, who is one of the most underrated characters of modern comedies. Illegally taping movies? And here I was thinking that he committed a more serious crime! What a doozy! Have you ever seen Osmosis Jones? It sucked. Maybe I should have watched it when I was a kid, but I was forced to watch it with my girlfriend and her little brother. Didn't even make out. What a bummer. Looking back, my despair towards lack of getting any action might have contributed to the review of the movie. And to be clear, I wanted to do things to my girlfriend, and not to her little brother. Beat you to it, didn't I? While I'm being honest, I'm thinking of breaking up with my gf because she wants to get more serious, and her mom is a butt ugly bitch. They say that to see a woman's future, check out her mom. The scariest part is that her mom says, "You remind me of me when I was younger so much" all the ******* time. Sure, she might be cool now, but if she turns into that, I might end up on one of those informative murder porn shows. You know, like Snapped. I'd rather be on a show like Survivor or Big Brother. Yeah, I still watch Big Brother, big whoop, wanna fight about it? It's entertaining, but then again, I was kinda hook on Jersey Shore, so maybe my judgement isn't the best when it comes to televised programming preferences. Well, if you're still reading, you're a glutton for punishment, and I hope you've enjoyed your torture. By the way, the first person to say "titties" in the comments will be stickied. Imagine the faces of those who haven't finished this like you, you brave time wasting son of a bitch, that will think "why are titties stickied?" But we'll know, and we'll keep it our little secret. I won't tell if you don't. Titties!