Blacklight phone muthatrucka. I say mothatrucka because seems too harsh to be put in the title. Rest assured, the unofficial title shall henceforth be referred
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Blacklight phone muthatrucka

I say mothatrucka because ************ seems too harsh to be put in the title. Rest assured, the unofficial title shall henceforth be referred to as Blacklight Phone ************ . Not to be confused, or affiliated with, ************ Jones, who is one of the most underrated characters of modern comedies. Illegally taping movies? And here I was thinking that he committed a more serious crime! What a doozy! Have you ever seen Osmosis Jones? It sucked. Maybe I should have watched it when I was a kid, but I was forced to watch it with my girlfriend and her little brother. Didn't even make out. What a bummer. Looking back, my despair towards lack of getting any action might have contributed to the review of the movie. And to be clear, I wanted to do things to my girlfriend, and not to her little brother. Beat you to it, didn't I? While I'm being honest, I'm thinking of breaking up with my gf because she wants to get more serious, and her mom is a butt ugly bitch. They say that to see a woman's future, check out her mom. The scariest part is that her mom says, "You remind me of me when I was younger so much" all the ******* time. Sure, she might be cool now, but if she turns into that, I might end up on one of those informative murder porn shows. You know, like Snapped. I'd rather be on a show like Survivor or Big Brother. Yeah, I still watch Big Brother, big whoop, wanna fight about it? It's entertaining, but then again, I was kinda hook on Jersey Shore, so maybe my judgement isn't the best when it comes to televised programming preferences. Well, if you're still reading, you're a glutton for punishment, and I hope you've enjoyed your torture. By the way, the first person to say "titties" in the comments will be stickied. Imagine the faces of those who haven't finished this like you, you brave time wasting son of a bitch, that will think "why are titties stickied?" But we'll know, and we'll keep it our little secret. I won't tell if you don't. Titties!

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Views: 38510
Favorited: 218
Submitted: 07/19/2014
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Comments(61):

[ 61 comments ]

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User avatar #5 - arkamedies (07/19/2014) [+] (7 replies)
stickied by thebadspellir
titties?
#6 - anon (07/19/2014) [+] (3 replies)
If I wanted to see my seed all over the place I would just get a bloody garden.
User avatar #3 - eiramart ONLINE (07/19/2014) [+] (3 replies)
Oh man, my dick is once more stuck in the ceiling fan.
#4 to #3 - anon (07/19/2014) [-]
Oh ma gawd so fawny haw haw
User avatar #13 - rebornpotato ONLINE (07/20/2014) [-]
Even though this is super simple and im sure nothing bad can happen, i'm still skeptical of this after seeing posts like the ones on 4chan for how to make the "magic crystals"
#17 - zestothefolf (07/20/2014) [+] (2 replies)
Am I the only one who thinks he wrote on this paper with cum?
User avatar #16 - evilanakie (07/20/2014) [-]
this is ********
i turned it on in my room and it glowed white not purple
0/10
User avatar #11 - Kairyuka ONLINE (07/20/2014) [-]
I'm seriously skeptical of this
User avatar #14 - dehfurk (07/20/2014) [-]
I can finally clean the semen all around my room without getting a blacklight
#10 - ohsopainful ONLINE (07/20/2014) [+] (1 reply)
does this work on all devices?
does this work on all devices?
#12 to #10 - anon (07/20/2014) [-]
Theoretically, it should.
#2 - kampi (07/19/2014) [-]
Although the content is quite interesting and gives me the urge to try it out myself so am I far more impressed by the informative story in the description.   
   
+1 for you, good sir!
Although the content is quite interesting and gives me the urge to try it out myself so am I far more impressed by the informative story in the description.

+1 for you, good sir!
#23 - Sworley (07/20/2014) [+] (1 reply)
homemade camera zoom from laser pointer
#51 - wiredguy ONLINE (07/20/2014) [+] (2 replies)
>people thinking that UV light alone is enough to make semen glow

you need to apply luminol and an oxidant. luminol glows under UV light in its oxidised state, the iron in the blood or semen or whatever will catalyse this effect and make areas where it is present more visible than those where it's not.
User avatar #45 - copsncrooks (07/20/2014) [+] (4 replies)
So how is UV light produced?
#49 to #48 - flyingfisherman (07/20/2014) [-]
1. It is rubbish   
2. It works   
3. You could do this with nearly any light source   
Naturally for better  light You buy one but this would be some case of emergency to read secret  message from your spy daddy lulz
1. It is rubbish
2. It works
3. You could do this with nearly any light source
Naturally for better light You buy one but this would be some case of emergency to read secret message from your spy daddy lulz
#43 - anon (07/20/2014) [-]
If a dog has no nose, how does it smell?

Awful.
User avatar #30 - ratbag (07/20/2014) [+] (4 replies)
It's funny because hack was used correctly here

(Hack= to fix or improve)
User avatar #26 - guidedhand (07/20/2014) [+] (2 replies)
pretty sure thats not gonna be anywhere near the right wavelength. LED's arent even true white.
#54 - anon (07/20/2014) [-]
This is actually awesome, it works!
User avatar #52 - bitchesdigcelestia (07/20/2014) [-]
the comments are just full of people complaining about iphones....who really cares? it's a phone...
User avatar #46 - reican ONLINE (07/20/2014) [-]
"apple"
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