At least he wasn't texting. Share your encounters with the law! I once got pulled over for expired license plates and received a warning....yea, I'm a riot at p pan Criminal
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At least he wasn't texting

At least he wasn't texting. Share your encounters with the law! I once got pulled over for expired license plates and received a warning....yea, I'm a riot at p

Share your encounters with the law!

I once got pulled over for expired license plates and received a warning....yea, I'm a riot at parties.

Tags: pan | Criminal
Anonymous (ID: )
04/ 26/ 14( sat) tyl: 38: 43 No. 5438981 76
a cop
doing cop things
a guy driving like 15 miles
below the speed limit
36 KB we Reweaving around like a
************
see lets of smoke coming out of his
windows
he' s blazing it, pull him over
up to his window and he rolls it down
s got a ******* hot plate plugged into his
cigarette lighter
is making pancakes while driving
and burned them
...
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Views: 27175
Favorited: 32
Submitted: 07/07/2014
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#1 - reretzu (07/07/2014) [-]
You gotta do what you gotta do.
You gotta do what you gotta do.
User avatar #4 - thamuz ONLINE (07/07/2014) [-]
Do county jail stories count?? If so I have a few I can share.
#12 to #4 - huehuehueone (07/08/2014) [-]
Story time!
Story time!
User avatar #14 to #12 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
>Control calls over radio XXX-PD has one en route. Heavily intoxicated,and a fighter.
> ******* .jpg I love fighters.

>10 minutes pass and the PD pulls into the bay. We have the chair and other needed things ready.
>Dude calms down,not fighting anymore,still drunk,but was tazed/cleared by ER before arrival.
>Open door to the whole scene of Eddy Murphy opening the kids bathroom door. Horrible **** /piss/vomit rank. 11/5.
>Me being the FNG and this is my first ever pat search of a new intake. Wonderful.
>Ask the guy his name and if he's ok due to being visibly drunk still.
>start patting him in and feel something horribly squishy in pants legs. Ask him if he's ok again. Roll pant leg up and see big brown smear
>starts laughing as a small puddle forms by other foot.
>continue pat search.
>goes by smooth until I get to the belt. man starts giggling again and the smell hits us.
>This ************ **** himself! Again!
>Sargent looks at another officer and states this dudes getting a free shower tonight.
>finish pat search and walk off and bathe in hand sanitize while trying not to laugh at the poor trusty who came up to pick up his clothes so they could be washed.
>laughed at the poor clean up trusty who came up to was the patrolmans car clean.

See comment 13 for another story.
User avatar #7 to #4 - soldieroffortunemp (07/08/2014) [-]
Me too.
User avatar #15 to #7 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
Posted 2.
User avatar #18 to #15 - soldieroffortunemp (07/08/2014) [-]
Those are by far worse than any I have but I will give it a try.

>Be me FNG and I hear a call over the radio
>YCSO in with one male he is combative. Oh yes never been in a fight before bring it.
>The car pulls into the bay we are all ready to get it on with this guy.
>out steps this little man about 5'4" at most and saying "sorry".
>he had a bloody head wrap he got from the hospital.
>after we get the guy searched and placed into holding we ask the cop what happened.
>"this guy was punching and kicking the crap out of his wife, when is showed up I told him to stop and get on the ground, he refused. So I tased him. I went to get him into the cuffs. he stood back up and tried to kick me so I tased him again. He fell over and smashed his head open."
> I check on him in the holding cell and he has taken his bandage off and started smearing blood all over the cell and windows.
>he writes I'm sorry.
User avatar #19 to #18 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
I hated dealing with bleeders. Never know what you could catch from those nasty ass ******* .
#10 to #4 - obxgamer (07/08/2014) [-]
tell your tale, stranger.
User avatar #13 to #10 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
>Female comes into intake,drunk,and tipsy. 3/10 drug monkey visible track marks and horrible body care/odor hair all over and in PJ pants and tank.
>Male officers(i am one of them) can't pat her in. Call female officer to intake.
>about a quarter of the way of the intake frisk,officer notices a faint buzzing sound. Thinks its a cell phone.
>Arresting officer has her cell phone. Wonder if its another one. After questioning her she states she doesn't have a cell phone. But she wont tell us what she has.
>Get another female officer up front to assist. Arresting officer asks us to perform a strip search of her.
>Paperwork filled out,female officers take her into the room we use for stripping inmates out for housing.
>Buzzing object not located but they can hear the buzzing during the strip. Female continues to refuse to give it up.

*note* at this point,we cant house her in a detox cell. due to legal reasons and stuff(any law enforcement members will know what we talk of here)

>have her sit in chair in a jumper
>shes visibly uncomfortable
>10 minutes later after talking to arresting officer and paperwork start processing her property
>open purse expecting to find usual lady like things.
>NOPE.jpg purse full of used and horribly disgusting dildos. I mean used and heavily used. Can visibly see hair/fecal matter/dried stuff all over them hilt to tip. They reek.
>Contain disgust. Call Corporal over ask wat do?
>Cpl looks at bag,looks at her "Do you have one of these in you?"
>Female doesn't respond,visibly something,not sure if in pain or Ecstasy at this point.
>Cpl walks off to find Sargent. I continue to inventory the purse. They never stop ending!
>at least 25-35 rubber phallus in bag. Finally sort the rest of her stuff.
>Female states she needs to use the rest room really badly.
>Call Sgt over and a pair of female officers.
>She will willingly give us whatever is inside her if we let her use the rest room after.
>Turns out it was a vibe bullet It was in her ass.
#28 to #13 - DrDanny (07/08/2014) [-]
hwat in the..... post more plz
User avatar #29 to #28 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
That's minor compared to some of the things ive seen come out of an orifice in that job..
User avatar #31 to #29 - DrDanny (07/08/2014) [-]
You should post more as content.
User avatar #33 to #31 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
FJ has a rather odd thing with OC and here. Maybe I will when I can write them all down in a cohesive manner.
#35 to #33 - DrDanny (07/08/2014) [-]
if you don't mind answering, I've been thinking about joining the police force (I'm 19. 20 in August) would you recommend it, any advice, and what should I expect?
User avatar #36 to #35 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
Its possible. But I will recommend strongly starting in the jail before going to a PD. As a street officer you dont have to deal with the idiots after you drop them off. But knowing how they act/talk/behave in the jail gives you a huge leg up in the streets because you understand what they are saying.

Paperwork paper work paperwork. Learn it,if it isnt written down it never happened.

I don't really fear inmates. I don't really have reason to. Now fellow officers and ranking echelons? That is a whole other story.
User avatar #37 to #36 - DrDanny (07/08/2014) [-]
If you don't mind, could you tell me about yourself? like what draws you to want to do what you do? I'd like to know if I'd be a good fit for it. Are you happy with that job?
User avatar #38 to #37 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
Currently a jailer without an agency. I was let go for failing a pretest by 2 points.

Will be hired back after i finish my training. Have to do the hands on.

Eh,what do you wanna know? I wanted a job,I wanted to help people. Seemed to work.

Was I happy with the job? When I first started. But when I was let go? No. I dreaded going to work. Coupled daily policy changes in the agency I worked for,and the constantly in your ass but never on the floor admin didn't help. I loved the crews I worked with. But the upper echelon? I dunno. I respected them but they have forgotten how to work a floor and don't know what it's like to run a floor where you have 88 guys asking for the same ******* thing over and over again.

Its not who you know,its who you blow. Being an ass kisser goes far.
User avatar #45 to #38 - thesinful (07/08/2014) [-]
My uncle 2nd cousin but uncle was easier when I was a kid is a warden so he's told us some stories. One main thing that stuck with me is that despite what people think, inmates usually gave less lip to female guards than males. Something along the lines of not feeling like they're being challenged so much.
User avatar #46 to #45 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
Its a bit of that,but its also a bunch of they know they can get the **** kicked out of them by the other inmates. Especially if its a good female officer who has a solid presence in the units.

Most younger(read:kids) don't understand this and will be smart mouthed ********* to anyone in the units. Both guards and other inmates and then cry when they get rehoused in the segregation units.
User avatar #39 to #38 - DrDanny (07/08/2014) [-]
Interesting. Thanks for your input!
User avatar #40 to #39 - thamuz ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
I should also say this law enforcement is just like the story of Damocles.

You have that sword over you every day even if you have the uniform on or not. From legal liability to those you piss off. I will not hesitate to say that some of those mafia members scare the **** out of me and you don't expect it when you meet them. Some people have no problem gutting you or cutting your head off and sending it to your mother in a box with a thank you card. Some of the gangs are just as bad when you see what they can do.
User avatar #42 to #40 - DrDanny (07/08/2014) [-]
That is definitely good to know.
User avatar #8 - missaddie (07/08/2014) [-]
I was on my way home from the grocery store one night and forgot to turn my headlights on (I was used to driving a car that had automatic lights) and was pulled over. The cop came with a flashlight on and checked the backseat, asked me for my license registration and insurance, and said 'You forgot to turn on your headlights. Is that Neapolitan Icecream? That's my favorite. We can't let that melt, go on."
User avatar #6 - Lambda (07/07/2014) [-]
One time I was out for a walk in my neighborhood around midnight in the summer.
A cop pulled over and began to question me about where I was going and why, and didn't want to accept my explanation that I was out for a walk just for the enjoyment of the night.
I asked him if he'd ever read The Pedestrian by Ray Bradbury. He went quiet for a second, then told me to shut up and go home, and he drove away. I think he'd read it.
User avatar #11 to #6 - jacksipian (07/08/2014) [-]
what's the book about?
User avatar #16 to #11 - fatalkill (07/08/2014) [-]
It's a short story. Its about a writer that was going on a walk at night, a cop pulls up on him because EVERYBODY does nothing but watch tv. He explains that he's a writer and doesn't have a tv. The cop thinks he's crazy and takes him to an asylum.
sauce
[spoiler] mikejmoran.typepad.com/files/pedestrian-by-bradbury-1.pdf[/spoiler]
User avatar #17 to #16 - jacksipian (07/08/2014) [-]
oh cool.
User avatar #9 to #6 - redpancake (07/08/2014) [-]
Same thing happened to me, they thought I was some guy who broke into a Salvation Army thrift store. If it weren't for my friends I would have probably been booked that night for breaking and entering...
User avatar #24 - sirbearington (07/08/2014) [-]
-aside, to butler- grr. rowlor? -gestures at face- rrft rfft hrrng.
User avatar #25 to #24 - bearingtonbutler (07/08/2014) [-]
I'll let them know, sir.


-ahem- HIS LORDSHIP GREETS YOU ALL WARMLY. SIR BEARINGTON HAS A MIGHTY HUNGER FOR PANCAKES, AND REQUESTS THAT YOU POST PANCAKES AND PANCAKE ACCESSORIES.
#34 to #25 - rasorburn (07/08/2014) [-]
He gets waffles, 			************		.
He gets waffles, ************ .
#41 - thesinful (07/08/2014) [-]
> Move to new town
> Finish unpacking. Decide to walk around town
> Listening to ipod, learning where **** is in town.
> Cop pulls his car in front of me
> Cop questions me about burglaries in town over last month.
> Cops says he's never seen me in town before and I look suspicious.
> Tell cop I just moved here. Finished unpacking less than an hour ago.
> Cop insists I look suspicious and demands ID>
> Whatever. Hand it over
> Cop radios in my name to check for outstanding arrest warrants on me.
> After 15 minutes cop finally accepts he's got nothing on me. Lets me go with warning he's "got his eye on me."
> 10 hours later get "randomly" pulled over by same cop on my way home from dinner.
< Cfw every time he saw me.
#3 - davemill ONLINE (07/07/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#23 - Customer Services ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
>A cop
>Enjoying 4chan
User avatar #43 - irishalbino (07/08/2014) [-]
My friends and I were hanging out in one of my friend's driveways screaming random **** . We got the cops called on us, and the description the person gave the operator was that she heard a bunch of girls screaming. There were only six of us and only one girl.
User avatar #32 - arsonistchapel (07/08/2014) [-]
When me and my friends were 16 and stupid we put a smoke machine in my car. god, we were stupid
User avatar #22 - phoenix grinder (07/08/2014) [-]
back in my day, we looked down on reposts

#27 - anon (07/08/2014) [-]
how many times will i see this reposted
User avatar #20 - neokun ONLINE (07/08/2014) [-]
Is that something he could be arrested for?
User avatar #21 to #20 - iiiphoenixiii (07/08/2014) [-]
Reckless + dangerous driving charges would = at least a license loss.
#5 - maracassass (07/07/2014) [-]
I like pancakes...
#2 - cdroid (07/07/2014) [-]
Still had to get a ticket for reckless endangerment. Anything you do that makes you unsafe is grounds for a ticket.
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