American joke
| |
Anonymous comments allowed.
68 comments displayed.
#3
-
drayden (09/30/2015) [-] this dude slams americans for being fat all the time even though he's not in good shape at all....
#5 to #4
-
drayden (09/30/2015) [-] without a doubt! i just dont find fat jokes as relevant to americans as much considering every other country i've been to seemed to have a similar amount of fatties around , but i do live in the healthiest state in the country so i guess i dont associate fat with americans as much. the south has slobs like the pic you posted.
#11 to #3
-
frenzyhero (09/30/2015) [-] It's fine, we slam Germans for being Nazis, and French being useless in war, and Brits as being civilized - none of these things are totally true.
Also, everyone is a critic. Just because someone can't build a car doesn't mean they can't give feedback on its performance, for example.
I mean, what's really funny is the new Corvette._ It's a Mexican car_! It's unreliable, it cuts cost with cheap material, discards driver accommodations, but hey! At least it's fast!
Attached is only slightly related.
Also, everyone is a critic. Just because someone can't build a car doesn't mean they can't give feedback on its performance, for example.
I mean, what's really funny is the new Corvette._ It's a Mexican car_! It's unreliable, it cuts cost with cheap material, discards driver accommodations, but hey! At least it's fast!
Attached is only slightly related.
#63 to #62
-
frenzyhero (10/01/2015) [-] Yeah oh boy I sure wish there was a 911 out there that could run at 210mph for more than 20 minutes!
#64 to #63
-
dasbrot (10/02/2015) [-] Wouldn't it be nice if there was a simple car that could blitz a racetrack, blast like a rocket, howl like god's plumbing, be endlessly repairable/tunable, doesn't catch fire at any speed, NOT cost a mortgage payment to buy, and not be charged 500+ euros for a GPS that should've been standard in the first place?
I love the 911. But I would buy the vette. Or maybe a GTR?
I love the 911. But I would buy the vette. Or maybe a GTR?
#66 to #64
-
frenzyhero (10/02/2015) [-] And when I post a tweetybird I obviously am not referring to the new 911s.
#65 to #64
-
frenzyhero (10/02/2015) [-] Because it's an unreliable ******* .
www.motortrend.com/features/performance/2015_motor_trend_best_drivers_car/viewall.html
Last year's model had even worse problems.
www.carbuzz.com/news/2014/9/10/New-Corvette-Stingray-Suffers-Total-Engine-Failure-After-Just-6-000-Miles-7722520/
2013 model had faulty valve guides.
www.arfc.org/complaints/2013/chevrolet/corvette/engine/problem.aspx
You get my point?
www.motortrend.com/features/performance/2015_motor_trend_best_drivers_car/viewall.html
Last year's model had even worse problems.
www.carbuzz.com/news/2014/9/10/New-Corvette-Stingray-Suffers-Total-Engine-Failure-After-Just-6-000-Miles-7722520/
2013 model had faulty valve guides.
www.arfc.org/complaints/2013/chevrolet/corvette/engine/problem.aspx
You get my point?
#67 to #65
-
dasbrot (10/02/2015) [-] Not really. I don't know why Porsche fanboys pint and laugh at other cars when they're just as guilty, and a third more expensive, and way more expensive to repair here in N America.
www.thetruthaboutcars.com/2010/08/porsches-deadly-sin-1-1999-porsche-911-996-3-4/
money.cnn.com/popups/2006/autos/reliable/5.html
www.ausmotive.com/2014/02/15/991-porsche-911-gt3-lights-my-fire.html
Again I'm not bashing either car. I'm just bashing the feverish fanbases that claim superiority because it's their favorite car, regardless of any merit on the car's part. Do you understand?
www.thetruthaboutcars.com/2010/08/porsches-deadly-sin-1-1999-porsche-911-996-3-4/
money.cnn.com/popups/2006/autos/reliable/5.html
www.ausmotive.com/2014/02/15/991-porsche-911-gt3-lights-my-fire.html
Again I'm not bashing either car. I'm just bashing the feverish fanbases that claim superiority because it's their favorite car, regardless of any merit on the car's part. Do you understand?
#68 to #67
-
frenzyhero (10/02/2015) [-] I never once said a damn thing about modern 911s.
And I even just said that I wasn't talking about new 911s. Verbatim.
Technically I never even posted a Porsche on this thread, and for posting a Yellowbird doesn't make me a fanboy.
And I even just said that I wasn't talking about new 911s. Verbatim.
Technically I never even posted a Porsche on this thread, and for posting a Yellowbird doesn't make me a fanboy.
#16 to #15
-
frenzyhero (09/30/2015) [-] Most of the jokes are about Hammond being short or May being old, or Lamborghinis being for idiots.
#50 to #11
-
broswagonist ONLINE (10/01/2015) [-] You're the first American on funnyjunk I've seen that said it's fine to slam americans because you do the same to other countries.
#53 to #50
-
frenzyhero (10/01/2015) [-] Just because we don't say it doesn't mean we don't care. The **** do I care what other people say?
#56 to #53
-
broswagonist ONLINE (10/01/2015) [-] Because you keep quiet there's an overwhelming vocal majority that believes people pick on Americans too much while being huge hypocrites. And since they're the only ones we hear from, well... you get the picture.
#58 to #56
-
frenzyhero (10/01/2015) [-] The loudest majority is the minority in any community. That's why idiots think /b/ is full of pedos, when in reality it's just a bunch of faggots that get off to furry porn.
#59 to #58
-
broswagonist ONLINE (10/01/2015) [-] That's not a given, and regardless the loudest majority are the ones that are going to give the impression to others. I can't just assume "oh sure, most of the americans I've seen online seem to think like this, but clearly it's not a significant number of them". That's dumb.
#57 to #54
-
frenzyhero (10/01/2015) [-] It's Stefan Roser test driving the RUF CTR Yellowbird on the Nurburgring circa 1987. The Yellowbird is a modified '87 Porsche 911. For reference, the 2008 Porsche 911 Carrera 4S is only 0.48 seconds faster, and the Yellowbird is 0.68 seconds faster than the 2012 BMW M6 F13. Minimum of 21 years later and it's still an incredibly fast production car.
Fun fact: Because RUF produces their own parts for their cars, Germany recognizes them as a manufacturer, not a tuning house, which makes the Yellowbird a production car, not a modified car.
Which made the Yellowbird, at the time of its release, the fastest production car in the world. And 21 years later, it's still an incredibly fast car, with a top speed of 213MPH. For reference, the new GTR has a top speed of 193MPH. Their 0-100mph dashes are 6.71 and 7.8... in the Yellowbird's favor.
Though the GTR is still faster around a circuit than the Yellowbird. A stock yellowbird. If you brought its suspension and tyres up to today's standards, reduced its cd and increased downforce, it could most likely post in the low 7 minutes. However, it's a collector's car now, combined with the extreme danger of driving it and the pointlessness of it all, it's not worth it.
Fun fact: Because RUF produces their own parts for their cars, Germany recognizes them as a manufacturer, not a tuning house, which makes the Yellowbird a production car, not a modified car.
Which made the Yellowbird, at the time of its release, the fastest production car in the world. And 21 years later, it's still an incredibly fast car, with a top speed of 213MPH. For reference, the new GTR has a top speed of 193MPH. Their 0-100mph dashes are 6.71 and 7.8... in the Yellowbird's favor.
Though the GTR is still faster around a circuit than the Yellowbird. A stock yellowbird. If you brought its suspension and tyres up to today's standards, reduced its cd and increased downforce, it could most likely post in the low 7 minutes. However, it's a collector's car now, combined with the extreme danger of driving it and the pointlessness of it all, it's not worth it.
#21 to #11
-
becauseoprahsaidso (10/01/2015) [-] it would suck to pop a tore in a car going that fast without a rollcage
#24 to #21
-
frenzyhero (10/01/2015) [-] Or brake for about a millisecond too long or too hard, misshift, forget to revmatch and unbalance the car during a downshift while entering a corner, hit a cold part or graffitid part of the track at the wrong angle or while cornering, angle the wheel just a millimeter off, or gas just a tad too hard.... all done in 1987, fully stock RUF CTR Yellowbird- which means 1987 tyres, too.
The Yellowbird is one of the most notoriously difficult cars to drive, on the Nurburgring, the most deadly course on the planet.
The Yellowbird is one of the most notoriously difficult cars to drive, on the Nurburgring, the most deadly course on the planet.
#25 to #24
-
becauseoprahsaidso (10/01/2015) [-] do you really have to be that precise? I always thought there was a bit of wiggle room when racing, not much but some.
#23
-
Visual (10/01/2015) [-] The constant America jokes are tasteless and boring. I can laugh at good America jokes all day but these jokes just come across as forced and samey. It's always something to do with fat people, "LOL AMERICA AMIRITE GUIZE", and/or Britbongs are superior than 'Muricans because of something trivial. It's very pretentious.
#29 to #23
-
shieeetposter (10/01/2015) [-] I'm good (but not humoured) for any type of plain old joke, but not when it's forced. The fst joke here is a bit of a stretch.
#42
-
anon (10/01/2015) [-]
It's almost as if he knows Americans can't take being made fun of and he gets a massive kick from that.
Predicting tears in comments
Predicting tears in comments
#44 to #42
-
dildobarbarian (10/01/2015) [-] thats basically one our most treasured traits as being english.
#18
-
donfailed ONLINE (10/01/2015) [-]
I think we usually lump that stuff together with Indian food or call it "Middle Eastern." Can't say for sure, since I've only been to one or two restaurants that serve it. I know it'll be a dead giveaway if you see the word "Halal" on the menu, though.
#37
-
padorak (10/01/2015) [-] HEY GUIZE BIRTISH PEOPLE HAVE POOR HYGIENE!
Now where's my two thousand thumbs because that's literally the equivalent of what this guy says every stupid ******* episode of this show.
America joke are funny as **** , in moderation, and when you don't beat the dead horse so bad it turns into a red paste.
Now where's my two thousand thumbs because that's literally the equivalent of what this guy says every stupid ******* episode of this show.
America joke are funny as **** , in moderation, and when you don't beat the dead horse so bad it turns into a red paste.
#40
-
veryfahnyjokes (10/01/2015) [-]
Good thing it said Jeremy Clarkson in the first picture I thought it was that fat bitch Rosie O'donnell
#17
-
pokemonstheshiz (09/30/2015) [-] I'm pretty sure the only people that eat Iraqi food are Iraqi
#30
-
heartlessrobot (10/01/2015) [-] >Iraqi food
Sorry, I don't like goat that tastes like sand and plastic explosives.
Sorry, I don't like goat that tastes like sand and plastic explosives.
#10
-
tittylovin (09/30/2015) [-] Meanwhile this cuck is so used to absorbing ********** culture it's the first thing that springs to mind when he thinks of something European.
#22
-
richardhammondmark (10/01/2015) [-] Obviously we need more immigrants if it can't find Iraqi restaurants.
