A very Pokemon green text

>Be 10
> Just moved to a ****** small town in Hoenn.
> Dad is a Pokémon gym leader, never get to see him.
> Stresses me out to the point of having white hair.
> Decide to become a Pokémon trainer to slap him around in his own gym (for being so distant.
> Go to Birch laboratories… no one’s home.
> Throw a few computers down in a rage.
> Walk over to the tall grass
> It feels familiar, like I’ve done this before in another life.
> Hear a cry for help
> It’s some dumbass being attacked by a poochyena.
> He says, “ you over there take a Pokémon out of my bag and save me!”
> I try to leave
> I’m not allowed to leave.
> Look through his ghetto ass yellow bag
> “ **** three starters!”
> Take them all like a boss
> Wait several hours for the poochyena to kill him dead.
> Poochy walks away
> Approach the dying bitch ass
> He says, “tell my wife I love her”, then dies.
> I send out Treecko, and order it to cut that bitch open
> I throw the organs into the grass to thank poochy for my new slaves
> I crawl inside the carcass
> Then feel through his pockets and find an ID saying he was Prof Birch.
> A devious smile crosses my face
> I think to myself, “I’ll show you for not being available earlier”.
> Go to his house.
> **** his wife for a decade.
> Father some bitch named May.
> Send her out into the world to become a Pokémon master.
> Follow her from afar as her friendly rival Brendan.
> The cycle of distant fathers is finally broken.
> mfw